How much would a four year-old understand about...

mrsmig said:

...breastfeeding?

I am working on a scenario in which a four year-old boy has observed his brand-new sister being breastfed and later, on discovering the baby crying and unattended, attempts to breastfeed her himself.

Would this be something a four year-old would do? The boy in question has no other siblings and limited contact with babies in general.

Thanks in advance.

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Entirely possible, especially if no one's really explained that it's something only mommies can do. My 2.5 year old saw his little sister being supplemented with a bottle in the hospital and even though she nursed almost every feeding after that, he still thought she needed a bottle when she was hungry. I think it's hard to understand that food is going into the baby when they don't really see it, like when they see a clear bottle being drained.

4-year-olds are good with making logical conclusions. The flaws in their logic are are usually because they're missing some vital piece of info.

Based on my kids that's perfectly feasible. The only question would be can the 4yo pick up the baby and attempt to position it appropriately.

I agree with the picking-up issue, but I would be very surprised indeed if a four-year-old boy tried to do what is suggested.

What do you mean by 'brand new'? Days? Weeks?

Why doesn't the lad call for Mummy?

Is there scenario information missing here?

ETA - crossposted.

Children are mimics, and very small children are terrific mimics. Having two younger brothers, I can tell you that such an attempt would appeal to the logic of the three to four-year-old mind. Older than that? I'm not sure, but likely not.

Mimic is right! My daughter tried to French kiss me goodnight when she was four because "they do that on TV." We still laugh about it a decade later. I think your scene is totally feasible.

I'm no expert in child psychology but as a reader I think this is plausible especially if the wet nurse had just been nursing the infant, went off somewhere to drink, then the 4 yo picks up the baby and mimics the wet nurse. I wouldn't go much beyond that, in terms of what's in the mind of the 4 yo. If you do then I think a lot of research into child psychology would be in order.

I do question if a 4 yo could understand the ramifications of taking care of an infant though. Making a promise like that, and understanding the consequences of it, is beyond most present day teenagers, much less a 4 yo.

Hope that helps.

Ditto previous posters... it's completely feasible he might try to mimic an action like that he's seen before, but it's quite beyond a normal 4yo's comprehension to make a promise like that and/or really understand what that would entail.

PandaMan said:

I do question if a 4 yo could understand the ramifications of taking care of an infant though.

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I do agree with this, to a point...it's more plausible for a child that small to think "this makes baby stop crying" or something similar, than actually understanding it must be fed.

Family anecdote:

I was four when my sister was born. My mother was breast-feeding her and I was watching. I asked what the baby was doing; 'Drinking milk,' my mother said. Then she must have explained that in her breast was milk, for a baby to drink.

So I asked, 'Can she drink anything else?' My mother said, 'Yes, orange juice.'

So I said, 'Oh, is there orange juice in the other one?'

My daughter was four when her little sister was born, and she did this. Entirely plausible.

As for the "taking care of the baby" thing, she was able to understand things like:

- don't pick your sister up, but you may hug her
- playing with her feet and hands are okay, but don't touch her face
- if she's crying, come get mommy or daddy (this pretty quickly graduated to jumping up and saying "I didn't do it!" the moment the baby fussed . . . usually when she was, in fact, responsible!)

I agree that this is plausible. He might do so because he knows that breastfeeding is the way to feed a baby, and a crying baby might need to be fed. (But I think he'd probably only know this if someone--the mother or the nurse--told him that's how a baby gets milk). Or he may have observed that when the baby is upset, the mother or nurse has put the baby to the breast, and that the baby stopped crying; he might not know there's milk involved, might just know that doing so makes the baby stop crying.

Regarding making a promise to take care of the baby: I don't think it's likely a child that age would initiate such a promise. However, I think it's plausible that the four-year-old would have agreed to take care of the baby if the mother had said something like, "You take care of your baby sister, okay?"

My son begged me for a little sister when he was 5. I explained that I wasn't going to have another baby and he said, "Please mommy! She can sleep in my room and I'll take care of her." I think he imagined having a little sister would be like having a puppy.

I have a 4-year-old, although his brother is 20 months old at this point. When he was 2, I talked to him a lot about my tummy baby, and how he would have to be a good big brother and protect the baby. Whenever he would be rough with his little brother, I'd remind him of the need to "protect the baby." So if his mother made a point of introducing him to his sibling before birth (feeling kicks, talking to the baby, singing to the baby, etc), and of giving him a role to play, it could be feasible that it made an impression on him.

And yes, my 4-year-old boy has pretended to nurse his teddy bear. I have less confidence that a 4-year-old would be able to support a newborn's head and neck properly, or move one carefully.