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JoeEkaitis
02-18-2006, 10:21 PM
From The Dorcus Collection (http://lileks.com/institute/dorcus/index.html)

JoeEkaitis
02-18-2006, 10:22 PM
Why do people ask me for Ellen Degeneres's autograph?

eldragon
02-18-2006, 10:26 PM
"Everyone thinks I'm a girl."

robeiae
02-19-2006, 03:12 AM
"Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a woman's man, no time to talk..."

tiny
02-19-2006, 03:14 AM
"God, I feel like a tool."

PattiTheWicked
02-19-2006, 05:53 AM
"And those guys back home used to pick on me.... who's a stud now, huh, pal?"

Albedo of Zero
02-19-2006, 08:00 AM
"God if I didn't love her so, I'd so get rid of these clothes she makes for me."

Shwebb
02-19-2006, 08:02 AM
"Geez, what did I just put my foot in?"

PrettySpecialGal
02-19-2006, 08:54 AM
"Yeah, look at her. She wants me. Bad."

Paint
02-19-2006, 07:19 PM
"I can't bend over in these pants!"

brokenfingers
02-19-2006, 07:39 PM
Do I make ya horny, baby? I'll give you one guess what I'm holding in my hand...

rhymegirl
02-19-2006, 07:52 PM
"I really need to take a whiz--should I use the Men's Room or the Ladies Room?"

Unique
02-19-2006, 08:19 PM
I'll get you for this.

Shwebb
02-19-2006, 08:28 PM
She said she'd be right back, but it's been about an hour now. . . hmm. Those bathroom lines sure must be long.

Jaycinth
02-23-2006, 09:12 PM
I....I ....I peed myself!

Cheryll
02-24-2006, 10:33 AM
Elliott, the blonde Dorothy Hamill.

alleycat
02-24-2006, 10:32 PM
The "Who Reunited Tour '06" will soon be coming to a shopping mall near you! Tickets available at TicketMaster and select Paul Mitchell Salons.

DeniseK
02-24-2006, 10:36 PM
If I get any better looking, I'm gonna need two of me.

threedogpeople
02-25-2006, 05:17 AM
"I kinda' like the way it hugs my man b**bs."

Spirit_Fire
03-05-2006, 07:25 PM
"I might look like a girl... but at least I look super cool in this imitation chain mail shirt and imitation sandpaper ensemble!*"

(* I don't really know what you'd call a matching vest and pants set made with imitation sandpaper.)

poetinahat
03-20-2006, 05:51 AM
Hey, baby... I may be opinionated, but I'm eeeeeasily suede, if you get my drift...

Danger Jane
03-20-2006, 08:07 AM
"I wonder if Joe was lying when he said he saw Peyton Manning in this shirt..."

WerenCole
03-20-2006, 08:42 AM
I wonder if she likes my new fangled urban camoflage getup. . .

unthoughtknown
03-20-2006, 08:58 AM
Oh my gawd, here she comes and there's a hole in my shoe! Say, if I keep my foot in this pot plant while we are talking, I think my coolness is still manageable...

BlackCrowesChick
03-21-2006, 12:03 AM
"I bought this shirt from a Brady Bunch auction on ebay."

Godfather
03-21-2006, 12:05 AM
"she so wants me...


wait... that IS a she, right?"

Stew21
03-21-2006, 12:17 AM
"I should have worn my paisley Nehru!"

talkwrite
08-06-2007, 09:41 PM
Pardon me boy, it this where I catch the Chattanooga Choo-choo?