Concussions

AndyD

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So I was pretty badly concussed last Friday (type iii -- there is no type iv unless you want to include permanent brain damage). While skirting around a shoving match outside a bar I was punched in the back of the head. I was immediately knocked unconscious but hit repeatedly until the man was pulled off of me. I've no memories of the situation, of the ambulance ride, ct scans, and nights worth of medical treatment I received afterwards, but my friends tell me I didn't speak or look at the man. He just decided to attack.

The past few days have been rough, for lack of a better word. No one really prepares you for what the situation entails. Ignoring that my cheek was fractured, there's constant headaches that are more severe by a large margin than anything I've felt. Nausea creeps on, leaving you wanting to vomit for an hour. Random spouts of dizziness will knock you over if you're not careful. But what's really intolerable are the mental limitations. Simply put, you forget things. You struggle to form a coherent or articulate sentence. You can't read or focus for more than five minutes without bringing on the headaches and nausea -- this post has been an effort. You're not yourself. All your body wants to do is sleep -- it's 7:00 pm and I've spent two hours out of bed today.

At any rate, what I really need is some cheer ups. My friends have been great the last couple days but I don't think they realize the scope of the injury or the fact that it'll be between three weeks and three months before I'm back to normal. Jokes, funny stories, reminders that it'll pass, I'm new here, but I'd appreciate anything you can offer.
 

Caitlin Black

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First off, sorry that this happened to you. It really sucks.

Okay, funny stories or jokes or somesuch...

I'll start with a story that's sort of relevant, though I see it as funny now that it's ancient history.

I was on holiday interstate with the family as a kid, probably about 9 years old. At that age, I loved to run, and I was pretty fit. So we were walking along the sidewalk next to a beach, and it was night time. There were only a few street lights, but enough to see by.

So my family were walking really slowly, and I was like, "I want to run ahead."

"Stay in sight."

Okay, so I was off. It was great for about 30 seconds, then I reached some minor construction work. Basically there was some metal set-up so that people could go up above, sort of thing (I forget what it's called... rigging? I don't know).

So I saw that, and there was a metal pole going horizontal near the ground. Great - I'll jump that!

So I did. And hit my head on the *other* horizontal pole up higher. I was out like a light. The rest of the story was told to me afterwards.

A guy on a motorbike (a biker) saw me laying unconscious on the ground and decided to take me to the hospital. Cue the biker putting me on the back of the bike and driving off, with dad chasing after him swearing his head off.

Eventually the biker noticed dad, and he stopped and explained and everything. So I was taken to the hospital in a cab (it was nearby).

I distinctly remember running and jumping, but nothing after that.

(Well, I think it's funny now.)

Okay, jokes...

Hmm. Most of the jokes I know are too dirty for Office Party...

Ah!

What is brown and sticky?

A stick.

...

A goth is walking along the street with a rat on her head. An old woman sees them and says, "Ugh, what are you doing with that disgusting creature?"

"Squeak squeak," says the rat.

...

How many philosophers does it take to change a light bulb?

Define "change"...

...

Okay, that's all I've got right now. Feel better!
 

Kylabelle

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:roll: at Cliff! Well done! hahahaha

Andy, gosh, me too, I am sorry you're going through this, but it does sound like you have a handle on the process and you're gonna be fine.

If you want, feel free to come over to the Coffee Shop and hang out with us... We share all kinds of challenges plus weird fun stuff... It's a nice place just to hang out. Very low key and accepting.

We like newcomers! But be warned, some of our regulars enjoy welcoming folks with a *tacklehug* so don't be shocked. I believe a virtual tackle would probably not be too difficult for you. :D
 

Brightdreamer

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First off - a bit OT, but those side effects are the kind of thing too many writers tend to overlook when whalloping characters over the head every other chapter, shaking it off with a splash of water when they come to. I mean, sure, it makes for a convenient way to jump scenes, but concussions aren't to be taken lightly.

I'm afraid my life is too boring to provide any funny stories. When I need cheering up, the Internet is my friend. The following are more-or-less surefire smile generators for me.

(WARNING: Occasional swearing and off-color humor in some of the following links!)

Basic Instructions -Comic (Pretty consistent generator of humor.)

Filmcow.com - Humorous videos - (Particularly the Charlie the Unicorn series, Llamas in Hats series, Dark Midnight series, and Cosmic Adventures of Doctor Fabulous.)

Kingom of Loathing - FREE Parody Online RPG (Loaded with pop-culture and gaming references, while still being an eminently playful and highly addictive gaming experience.)

Rip Haywire - Comic (Action-hero parody; one of the funniest things to hit the comics page since Pearls Before Swine and Brewster Rockit.)

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Comic (Some crude humor and subject matter, but danged if I don't laugh more often than not.)

And, when all else fails, Neon Pegasus. Or Dumb Ways to Die (Video Game Parody). Can't help smiling watching those.
 

BradyH1861

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When I was in high school, I made a particularly hard hit on a kid on the football field. I got up and walked towards the sidelines. People were looking at me funny. Finally a teammate grabbed me and turned me around 180 degrees.

In my semi-concussed state, I was headed towards the opponent's sideline.
 

jjdebenedictis

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Okay, don't barf on me, dude; I'm comin' in.

**gentle hug**

I hope you feel better soon, and that your recovery winds up being on the speedy side!
 

AndyD

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That story cracked me up Clint -- particularly the partial kidnapping.

Belle -- I'd be happy to check out your coffee shop if only I could locate it! Seems to be hiding from me somewhere and I can't find the password to it. A virtual tackle hug doesn't sound too bad.

Bright -- Ahhh! I used to love SMBC. Haven't checked it in forever but their comics are great. And trust me, not having stories about getting the crap pummeled out of your head isn't an indicator that you've had a boring life.

Decided to take a few days and stay with my parents. It's nice but they won't stop reminding me that I could've been killed and that sort of talk doesn't seem terribly positive. Going to see an ENT thursday to discuss why my sinuses are leaking blood and a plastic surgeon Friday to -- hopefully -- reassure me my face look like itself in a couple weeks. Can't remember who brought it up, but I've got a newfound appreciation for all the heroes routinely getting pummeled in the head. Not to mention boxers. Christ.

edit: bright side? my face is too tender to shave, so this is the first time in my life I've grown a beard. Kinda like it.
 
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mirandashell

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Andy - don't worry too much. Your face will heal.

As for a joke - here's my favourite. (And all the oldies on the board are groaning cos they know what's coming.....)

What's the difference between a duck?

One of its legs is both the same.




Actually - that may not have been the best joke to tell you if thinking brings on a headache ......
 

SuspiciousCookie

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First off: That sounds terrible, Andy. He really just jumped on you for no reason whatsoever? People suck. I'd tell you to read my introduction and some of my other posts since people have told me several times they enjoyed reading them quite a bit, but that sounds like self-promotion so I'll just leave it with this implication.

Anyway, something that kind of interests me ... what happened to the guy that did this to you? Did he get arrested, at least? Or did your friends beat him up? I know I'd do that if someone I know got randomly jumped on.

Cheers,
Cookie
 

sheadakota

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Andy, concussions suck big time man, hope the world stops spinning for you soon and your brain starts playing nice again. As a trauma nurse, I understand what your going through. Hugs

As for the joke, well here's the first one I ever learned, I think I was 8, so keep that in mind.

A woman is at a dance and is very self conscious of her wooden eye she sits on the side lined until she notices a boy with very large ears sitting and looking miserable. She works up her courage and walks over to him and asks him to dance. He looks up at her elated and yells, " Would I, would I! Would I!"

She is shocked and yells back, "Fine, big ears, big ears big ears!"


Remember I said I was 8.
 

AndyD

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Cookie -- like I said, they were shoving eachother, we went in the street to walk around them, as far as I can tell one of them got pushed near me and decided I had a face he'd like to hit. My friends tell I was hit in the back and side of my head, collapsed unconscious, and then he started hitting me in the mouth. My older brother pulled him off, hit him once, before he was hit in the back of the head by one of the kids friends (he's got a minor concussion)-- there were six of them and three of us. They spotted a police car off in the distance and ran.

The police car spotted us, saw six kids running and assumed the worst, which in this case was kinda accurate, but decided they should probably help the guy who wasn't moving on the sidewalk. There's video surveillance footage but nothing to identify the kids with. I say kids but they were probably 19-21.
 

SuspiciousCookie

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Oh, I see. I must have missed that "shoving match" part on my first read. I didn't realize it was a whole group of guys. That really sucks.

What was the age difference, by the way? You guess them about 19-21 years, but what about you (it may be entirely possible you already said that somewhere and I, again, missed it, but please enlighten a silly cookie anyway :3), your older brother and the third guy who was with you (in case I didn't actually skip that part again)? Just wondering. Sorry to bother you with these silly questions.

Cheers,
Cookie
 

AndyD

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I'm 23, although I was insisting to the police I was 20 and still in college after they woke me up -- my brother had to correct me. My brother and his friend are 24.
No worries.
 

c.e.lawson

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Hi Andy,

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I don't know how much information/advice you were given by your doctor, but I'm going to post a link here with some very helpful and practical information. Yes, I realize you're not a high school athlete (which the info is geared towards), but it is a useful summary of what you might be experiencing and how you can help your brain heal, especially in these crucial early days following the injury. There are guidelines towards the end, if you scroll down, that are especially helpful. Take care of yourself and don't rush things! You will heal faster, the more you allow your brain to rest early on.

https://www.oata.org/documents/resources/Concussion_Parent_Info_Sheet_OHSAA_717C5D49FF347.pdf