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Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2013, 05:17 PM
... a space!

Anyone remember where I parked the king?

Haggis
04-01-2013, 05:18 PM
... a space!

Anyone remember where I parked the king?
You mean Elvis?

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2013, 05:25 PM
Pffft.

No, you ninny. The real king. Richard.

BTW... your ears look okay, but what's with that nose?

Maryn
04-01-2013, 05:32 PM
It's my parking space. I zipped in here first, ahead of you with your turn signal on. Good luck getting me out.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2013, 05:33 PM
But I bet I'm older and I have more insurance.

Alessandra Kelley
04-01-2013, 05:38 PM
But I bet I'm older and I have more insurance.

Mnemosyne cares not our eyes to hide.
In seeking chariots what's needed is endurance,
To find the long parked car and thence to ride.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2013, 06:12 PM
Y'all ain't from 'round these parts; are ya?

stormie
04-01-2013, 06:22 PM
There's a kingdom known here in NJ as the Garden State Parkinglot. It's probably stuck there.

Xelebes
04-01-2013, 08:04 PM
Lot 3-H, Parking Space 318-G on zoned parking provision 319876-54 has a hearse. If you need help, you can ask the driver there for a lift.

SWest
04-01-2013, 08:11 PM
:idea:











*queen takes bishop's pawn*

Checkmate!

:D

Haggis
04-01-2013, 08:15 PM
http://i116.photobucket.com/albums/o15/Damnhaggis/king-richard-parking-ticket-550x386.jpg

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2013, 08:56 PM
Geez... what would the fine for 528 years of illegal parking be?!

Haggis
04-01-2013, 09:07 PM
Geez... what would the fine for 528 years of illegal parking be?!
I'm not sure, but I once kept a library book that long.

SWest
04-01-2013, 09:08 PM
Geez... what would the fine for 528 years of illegal parking be?!

For sure it'll be cheaper to buy new identity papers and a plane ticket to Brazil...

Maryn
04-01-2013, 09:12 PM
I dunno, but my dad owes more than two grand to the library in fines on a book he checked out in 1944. As a child, I used to calculate what he owed every New Year's Day.

That probably pales in comparison to the parking fee, even with a daily maximum.

Maryn, laughing

Edit: Haggis, are you my dad?

benbradley
04-01-2013, 09:12 PM
Around back of the Waffle House. The King and William Shatner were wolfing down pancakes and hashbrowns.

Haggis
04-01-2013, 09:17 PM
I dunno, but my dad owes more than two grand to the library in fines on a book he checked out in 1944. As a child, I used to calculate what he owed every New Year's Day.

That probably pales in comparison to the parking fee, even with a daily maximum.

Maryn, laughing

Edit: Haggis, are you my dad?
I wouldn't wish that on you, Maryn. :roll:

Wicked
04-01-2013, 09:38 PM
... a space!

Anyone remember where I parked the king?


Down in Goals and Accomplishments?

Xelebes
04-01-2013, 11:40 PM
Geez... what would the fine for 528 years of illegal parking be?!

Bless Edward I's wisdom with his law against usury.

Catalyn
04-02-2013, 12:30 AM
Geez... what would the fine for 528 years of illegal parking be?!

Ok, we can work this out...

I once received a 60 fine for buying a parking ticket in a train station car park at 8.58am (before 9am was permit parking only and I didn't have a permit).

So if 2 minutes = 60, 528 years would be 8,325,504,000

Please note that I have not factored in leap years, nor added on any overdue fines. The train station car park was also in the arse end of Kent, where fines may be more draconian than elsewhere in the UK.

Alternatively, we could just clamp the body and have it towed away and crushed... I believe there's still an impounding fee involved here though.

ETA - actually if you don't pay a parking fee within 28 days it increases by 50% - not doing the maths on that one :tongue

shakeysix
04-02-2013, 12:38 AM
He's over in the handicap parking. Notice the little tag with the hunchback icon?

Catalyn
04-02-2013, 12:40 AM
He's over in the handicap parking. Notice the little tag with the hunchback icon?


Wait wait wait....

If he parked in a disabled space without displaying a valid blue badge, he's in SERIOUS trouble

Haggis
04-02-2013, 01:09 AM
Wait wait wait....

If he parked in a disabled space without displaying a valid blue badge, he's in SERIOUS trouble
I believe he parked under the disabled space.

WriterWho
04-02-2013, 02:20 AM
:e2crown:

Henry VII
04-02-2013, 03:59 AM
I believe he parked under the disabled space.

You do unbend your noble strength, to think so brainsickly of things.

Maryn
04-02-2013, 04:38 AM
Henry, my king, may I suggest you raise your son and namesake with a firm hand in regard to respecting the fair sex?

If you need guidance in what a 'firm hand' entails, your Worship, you have certainly come to the right person.

Haggis
04-02-2013, 05:34 AM
You do unbend your noble strength, to think so brainsickly of things.
Brainsickly? Tudor scum, what kind of evil doest thou utter?

Henry VII
04-02-2013, 05:36 AM
At last! Someone with respect for my crown!

Master de Sade: as for Henry, my younger son - he is destined for the priesthood. Arthur will be king when I am gone and he is betrothed to a princess from Aragon. So, you see, Henry's proximity to women will be limited.

Master Haggis: Varlet! Art thou one of those Plantagenet toadies? Be gone before I order thee beheaded!

shakeysix
04-02-2013, 05:42 AM
"Children should never be seen or heard...from, ever again!" Er..wait. That might have been WC Fields.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-02-2013, 05:46 AM
"Children should never be seen or heard...from, ever again!" Er..wait. That might have been WC Fields.

Think of the tourist trade!

Haggis
04-02-2013, 06:03 AM
Master Haggis: Varlet! Art thou one of those Plantagenet toadies? Be gone before I order thee beheaded!

Too late, usurper. I am already undone by your traitorous toadies, run through and through and left nothing more than a sop for crankcase oil beneath yon car park.

shakeysix
04-02-2013, 06:08 AM
a crookback crankcase sop? poetic!

Haggis
04-02-2013, 06:12 AM
a crookback crankcase sop? poetic!
Thank you.

I thought 'traitorous toadies' was right there as well.

Henry VII
04-02-2013, 06:17 AM
Posh and piffle! Your face is as a book, where men may read strange matters.

Haggis
04-02-2013, 06:26 AM
A million million spermatozoa
All of them alive:
Out of their cataclysm but one poor Noah
Dare hope to survive.


Okay, fine. It's not mine. I would have written it if Huxley hadn't first.

shakeysix
04-02-2013, 06:30 AM
Huxley? Not Aldous but close enough. You, sir, have ruined my evening. My seniors are reading Brave New World. I feel a clerihew coming on. Where is nymtoc? My Kingdom for a nymtoc!

Haggis
04-02-2013, 06:34 AM
Huxley? Not Aldous but close enough. You, sir, have ruined my evening. My seniors are reading Brave New World. I feel a clerihew coming on. Where is nymtoc? My Kingdom for a nymtoc!
Aldous, indeed. Read it once and was never able to shake it.

BNW was one of my favorites. But sorry. Homey don't do no clerihews.

Speaking of clerihews, have you ever read any Thomas Lynch?

shakeysix
04-02-2013, 06:39 AM
Thought sure it was Thomas, Darwin's Bulldog --(?). Anyway my seniors are fascinated; asking all kinds of questions about babies in jars and sexophons. I started to tell them about Barbarella but decided against it.

Ken
04-02-2013, 02:52 PM
... funny stuff :-D

Haggis
04-02-2013, 02:59 PM
Thought sure it was Thomas, Darwin's Bulldog --(?). Anyway my seniors are fascinated; asking all kinds of questions about babies in jars and sexophons. I started to tell them about Barbarella but decided against it.
:roll:

Komnena
04-02-2013, 06:19 PM
Just don't wither my arm, please.