I have the hiccups.

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JennaGlatzer

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I've been holding my breath for, like, four minutes and it isn't working.

Could somebody scare me, please?
 

BradyH1861

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I got the hiccups once when I was a youngster. Momma told me that someone had just run over my dog. It was mean, but it worked.

(and I was mentally traumatized for life, of course)

Brady
 

TheIT

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Every wannabe writer in the world suddenly discovers AbsoluteWrite and tries to login at the same time. The servers go up in flames and the entire database is lost.

Hang on, I think I just scared myself... ;)
 

AdamH

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Your Celine Dion biography has been found out to be all made up (even the part about Celine saving the world from evil insectoid aliens)!!!! And the media's breathing down your neck!!!! And you lose all respect from your peers!!!!!







-how's that? :tongue
 

rtilryarms

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jenna, I sent you a nude self pic.
You are now hiccupless
 

TheIT

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Every outstanding assignment deadline you have has been moved up to tomorrow.

(Uh, you've started breathing again, I hope? Holding your breath for four minutes is a long time...)
 

rhymegirl

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I'm not gonna scare you I'm gonna help you.

You have to hold your breath while swallowing 3 times and silently counting to 10. That should get rid of your hiccups.

I'll send you a bill for the medical advice.
 

robeiae

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JennaGlatzer said:
Could somebody scare me, please?
Nonsense. Drink some scotch (I find that this cures pretty much everything that doesn't involve open wounds...and it still helps those, too).

Rob :)

P.S. If you want to be scared, imagine Michael Moore and Ann Coulter having sex on Bill O'Reilly (his person, not his show).
 

JennaGlatzer

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scarletpeaches said:
NICOLE RITCHIE HAS WRITTEN A NOVEL!!!

:D Wait, I can one-up that...

AND THE AGENT I WORK WITH REPRESENTED IT!!

:e2smack:

You guys are pretty great. My hiccups are gone!
 

NeuroFizz

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Here ya go...

All better? Elvis Cameltoe is back!
 
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The presence of KTC in this thread disturbs me.

So much so that I doubt I shall ever hiccup again.
 
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That man either has a double ballsack or a camel toe.

Fake Elvis, I mean, not KTC.

Unless that was KTC?!
 

emeraldcite

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Take a mouthful of water. Tilt head back as far as you can. Swallow. It makes a funny noise and they are gone.

Heard that on the radio about ten years ago and I've used it ever since.

The only time it didn't work is when I visited a friend in pittsburgh, had a few shots of tequila, went to a bar, and had six or seven very large long island iced teas.

Yeah, nothing helped that one. Those most painful hiccups ever.
 
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KTC said:
Hunny, I would look better in an Elvis jumpsuit than Elvis did. That is not me!

You say the sweetest things. Ask Mrs KTC if I can borrow you.:Hug2:



My new chainsaw needs testing.
 

Shwebb

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Hey, Jenna--glad your hiccups are gone.

(BTW, did your husband, despite his refusal to open your OJ, ever catch your cold?)

Incidentally, the reason holding your breath or drinking ten swallows of water works when you hiccup is because not breathing puts your diaphragm out of commission, giving it a chance to relax and quit spasming.
 
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