Women and shoes.

aruna

On a wing and a prayer
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 14, 2005
Messages
12,862
Reaction score
2,846
Location
A Small Town in Germany
Website
www.sharonmaas.co.uk
I don't think there is any stereotype I hate more than this one. And I hate the way it's seeping more and more into the popular consciousness that female = shoe obsession.

The other day I was watching Millionaire in Germany and a woman won EUR 16000. So Guenther Jauch asked her what she's going to do with the money. She said she's going to buy a Harry Potter first edition. He didn't like that. "That's not a very womanly choice," he said, hint hint hint, shoe shoe shoe. So of course she added, rather coyly, '... and "of course" I'm going to do some shoe shopping!'

I see this all the time on TV (which I don't watch much, but every time I do the shoe thing seems to crop up. Women boasting how many shoes they have, showing off their shoe cupboard like their shoes are trophies or something, TV presenters saying things like "I bet you'll be spending it all on shoes!' to women, and women agreeing.

When did this nonsense start? I mean, in my day yes, girls liked fashion and beauty too, but there wasn't this idea that the highest goal for the female of the species is to own a room full of useless, expensive shoes!

Was it Imelda Marcos who started it all off? Or was I living under a stone all those years before I caught on to how I 'should' be spending my hard earned cash?

Sorry. Just had to vent.
 
Last edited:

Brutal Mustang

Loves interplanetary chaos.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Apr 14, 2008
Messages
2,003
Reaction score
449
Location
Casper, Wyoming
When did this nonsense start?

I don't know, and don't understand it either. I own a pair of steel toe boots, a pair of paddock boots with half chaps, and a pair of running shoes. Oh, and flip flops, of course. That's about it.
 

crunchyblanket

the Juggernaut of Imperfection
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 18, 2011
Messages
4,870
Reaction score
766
Location
London's grey and pleasant land
I don't know, and I can't stand it. I couldn't give a shiny shite about shoes as long as they're comfy - I've got arthritis already, I don't need my knees made worse by ludicrously high heels.

It's kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy, though. Popular culture tells women they're supposed to be mad for shoes, you'll get a sizeable proportion of women who'll internalise that message.
 

aruna

On a wing and a prayer
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 14, 2005
Messages
12,862
Reaction score
2,846
Location
A Small Town in Germany
Website
www.sharonmaas.co.uk
I don't know, and I can't stand it. I couldn't give a shiny shite about shoes as long as they're comfy - I've got arthritis already, I don't need my knees made worse by ludicrously high heels.

It's kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy, though. Popular culture tells women they're supposed to be mad for shoes, you'll get a sizeable proportion of women who'll internalise that message.

Exactly. And then you have so-called celebrities tottering around on ten-inch spikes and everyone thinks they have to follow suit. Consumerism at its best!
Shoes, for me, are for comfort. I basically wear the same pair day after day; at the moment, it's boots. Last summer it was a pair of trainers I've had for years, and which are SO comfortable! And then another pair I can wear with a dress (I do have one dress!) and that's about it.
 
Last edited:

crunchyblanket

the Juggernaut of Imperfection
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 18, 2011
Messages
4,870
Reaction score
766
Location
London's grey and pleasant land
My one footwear indulgence was a pair of hand-stitched cowboy boots. They are the comfiest shoes I own now I've worn them in. Otherwise, I own two pairs of trainers and two pairs of work shoes (I wear one pair to death and replace with the other)
 

aruna

On a wing and a prayer
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 14, 2005
Messages
12,862
Reaction score
2,846
Location
A Small Town in Germany
Website
www.sharonmaas.co.uk
If I do collect shoes, it's because I can't bear to throw away old pairs that have served me well for years and years, and are so very comfortable -- even if the soles are worn away!
 

Diana_Rajchel

Writing from my Seaside Palace
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 24, 2010
Messages
561
Reaction score
54
Location
San Francisco, CA
Website
blog.dianarajchel.com
There is nothing I hated more as a kid than shoe shopping, and as an adult I do it almost exclusively online. For me, it's a bit ironic - I run a fashion blog. A woman I went out for drinks with recently asked me if I owned a lot of shoes. Definitely more than the world average (my job, after all) but still less than the average woman in the US. I consider most badly designed instruments of misogyny, not things I want to spend money on.
 

dolores haze

international guttersnipe
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 18, 2007
Messages
4,952
Reaction score
3,937
Location
far from the madding crowd
When Sex and the City was popular I noticed a lot of women getting on the 'I'm a shoeaholic!' bandwagon. I despised that show with a passion. Forced myself to watch a few episodes. I dunno. Maybe it got better.
 

Priene

Out to lunch
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 25, 2007
Messages
6,422
Reaction score
879
When Sex and the City was popular I noticed a lot of women getting on the 'I'm a shoeaholic!' bandwagon. I despised that show with a passion. Forced myself to watch a few episodes. I dunno. Maybe it got better.

Seconded, on all accounts. I'd never heard anything about women having a particular love of shoes before that dross aired.
 

backslashbaby

~~~~*~~~~
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2009
Messages
12,635
Reaction score
1,603
Location
NC
I used to hate shoes (I have genetically deformed toes on both feet, so I'm bound to hate shoes). I got made fun of a little for picking one pair for each situation and only wearing those. But they are a pain, literally.

OTOH, sometime after college I kept finding beautiful shoes that I could wear. Maybe it's because I had more money? Maybe it's just how the styles changed (there are still a ton I can't wear). In any case, I'm not embarrassed now that I can fall in love with certain pairs of boots or whathaveyou. It's not something I'd put top on a list of things about me, but it does no harm :)

I don't usually tie it in to being a woman. That really is silly, I think. I'm pretty sure my brother still cares more about shoes than I do.
 

aadams73

A Work in Progress
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
9,901
Reaction score
6,428
Location
Oregon
I like pretty shoes. There was a time when I wore them to work every day. But my passion for them has long since dimmed, and these days I live in my Frye boots.

I didn't even cry when United Airlines lost my Jimmy Choo slingbacks last October. Well, not in public.
 
Last edited:

FabricatedParadise

Can be bribed with circus peanuts
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 22, 2010
Messages
2,485
Reaction score
1,267
Location
In a house with lots of books
I own about 10 pairs of shoes, but mostly because as a mom, student, wife, 20-something woman, gym addict, etc. I have to wear many different hats shoes.

I have exactly 2 pairs of dressy heels -- black for serious, color for fun.

The most expensive pair of shoes I own are my $60 running shoes and that was out of a need for proper shoes to work out in.

I think the shoe obsession is silly.

But then again, I'm sure a woman with a lot of shoes might say the same thing about my 600+ book collection.
 

Lavern08

Sit Down, and Shut Up!
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 14, 2009
Messages
21,790
Reaction score
7,436
Location
7th Heaven
Hi,

My name is Lavern and I have a ton o' shoes.
icon11.gif


However, I don't own any that I paid over $60 for...

...You see, although I consider myself a fashionista (a girly-girl who lurves clothes and shoes and jewelry and purses, etc.), I always find the deals and the steals.

I agree with Aruna that the "women are obsessed with shoes thing" is gag worthy, but some people love and collect books, music, or whatever, and some women just feel better about themselves when they wear pretty clothes and shoes. :Shrug:
 

icerose

Lost in School Work
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 23, 2005
Messages
11,549
Reaction score
1,646
Location
Middle of Nowhere, Utah
When I was a kid my parents had to tackle me and force me to wear shoes and with every opportunity they were back off. I'd walk over gravel for short distances before I'd put on shoes.

I'm not a whole lot different today other than my feet can't handle the gravel anymore. I am barefoot as often as I can be and if I ever did pay a lot of money for shoes, it'd be those barefoot feeling shoes so I could walk on the gravel without pain and still feel like I was walking around barefoot.
 

Maryn

Sees All
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
55,451
Reaction score
25,479
Location
Snow Cave
The shoe love goes back at least to my teenage years in the 1960s. And while I don't own a lot of shoes, and no designer shoes at all (poor me, huh?), I totally get it. If I cared more about appearances than I do, there are a lot of amazing shoes I'd want to own.

But really, it's not fair to characterize all women by such a shallow stereotype. I care about nail polish colors, too, but I'd rather spend my money on books, music, and travel--each more interesting to talk about, too.

Maryn, who got new boots not long ago
 

leahzero

The colors! THE COLORS!
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 1, 2009
Messages
2,190
Reaction score
377
Location
Chicago
Website
words.leahraeder.com
Never got this either. I own one pair of shoes and one pair of boots. But then, I also don't own a single dress, skirt, or sleeveless top. *shrug*

My female friends, who are all fellow geeks/nerds with geeky/nerdy interests and hobbies, are similar. Though I do think I'm at the extreme, as most of them tend to own a few dresses/skirts with shoes to match.
 

thethinker42

Abnormal Romance Author
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 30, 2006
Messages
20,733
Reaction score
2,669
Location
Pittsburgh, PA
Website
www.gallagherwitt.com
I haaaate shoe shopping. The only reason I own more than five or six pairs of shoes is because I have four pairs of riding boots (different styles required for different disciplines).

That said, I *will* spend a pretty good chunk of money on a pair of shoes. $150 for a pair of dress shoes or steel-toed boots, maybe up to $200. Reason being, there is nothing worse than an uncomfortable pair of shoes, one with no support, etc. I'm willing to pay through the nose for a pair that will last years and won't hurt my knees/feet/back. I once bought a pair of work boots for some obscene price, but they lasted almost ten years. I bought another rather pricey pair of dress shoes when I was working in retail. At the end of the day -- after buying them on my lunch break and breaking them in at work -- my feet didn't hurt. Even after some 12-hour days, my feet didn't hurt. Those shoes were worth their weight in gold.

So...yeah, I'll pay for comfort and durability, but beyond that? I'd rather lick a cheese grater than go shoe shopping.
 

jjdebenedictis

is watching you via her avatar
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 25, 2010
Messages
7,063
Reaction score
1,642
I can understand a person getting obsessed with shoes, but only because I can understand human beings getting obsessed with things that are beautiful and exquisitely designed, like shoes, or motorcycles, or porcelain dolls, or decorative knives.

When I was in university and making my own experimental apparatus in the machine shop, I loved the shiny little machines I crafted. It was so satisfying to look at this intricate, glittery thing you made that also was beautifully designed for its purpose. And that reaction certainly wasn't tied to me being female; the guys in the lab photographed and swooned over their hand-crafted apparatuses too.

I agree it's a sexist stereotype to say women get obsessed about shoes, but the impulse to love something for its beauty and clever design is pretty normal human behaviour.

All the same, my brain balks at anyone spending a thousand dollars on a pair of shoes that will hurt. Display it in your house as artwork, sure, but to wear?!
 
Joined
Aug 7, 2005
Messages
47,985
Reaction score
13,245
I don't think I've ever owned more than ten pairs of shoes at one time, but of those, I wear two or three regularly, and the others are kept for special occasions, i.e. hardly ever.
 

Toothpaste

THE RECKLESS RESCUE is out now!
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 18, 2006
Messages
8,745
Reaction score
3,096
Location
Toronto, Canada
Website
www.adriennekress.com
I hate shoe shopping. It's my absolute least favourite kind of shopping. Finding a pair of shoes that are actually comfortable seems like an impossible task.

At the same time, I like attractive things, be it a painting, a dress, shoes, a building etc.

I guess for me while I hate the notion that all women are obsessed with shoes, I also hate the backlash, that women who AREN'T obsessed with shoes sometimes display. That if you are a woman who likes attractive items of clothing, who DOES own more than one dress and dressy tops etc, that that makes you more superficial and less intelligent or cool or whatever.

I think as women we need to stop judging each other based on our choices, especially such superficial ones, and at the same time be wary about what the media is trying to conform us to. It's not just the popular trends that affect people, but the attitudes in response to it as well. For years I was proud not to enjoy shopping (for anything), and I thought that made me superior to the flaky girls who were all about looks and not about substance. But that changed as I grew older. I still don't much like shopping (I'm not good in crowds), but I like clothes, I like looking nice, I like coming up with cool outfits. And I denied that part of myself for so long for fear it would make me seem less intelligent or feminist or whatever.

Let's try to change all generalisations - not just the ones we don't like - so yes "All women like shoes" ought to be changed, but so should the attitude that "women who like shoes are superficial and flaky".
 

aruna

On a wing and a prayer
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 14, 2005
Messages
12,862
Reaction score
2,846
Location
A Small Town in Germany
Website
www.sharonmaas.co.uk
Toothpaste, I agree with you and it was not my intention to put down women who DO like clothes, shoes and so on. In fact, my daughter LOVES nice clothes, shoes, bags and so on, and she is anything but flaky and shallow. She is an example of how it is possible to have that balance between caring about your appearance and wearing nice things, and still care and be concerned bout more serious matters.

It's the all pervading cliche that gets on my nerves -- and the mindless consumerism that drive it, and the showing off -- look how many shoes I have!
Equally -- look how few shoes I have! which is far less pervasive, but exists all the same.
 

CaroGirl

Living the dream
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 27, 2006
Messages
8,368
Reaction score
2,327
Location
Bookstores
I don't care much about shoes. My feet used to be considered on the large side and I traditionally couldn't find the "cute" shoes in my size. So I lost interest. My size has since fallen within the norm but I still don't care much about shoes.

That said, I live in an extreme climate and I need a variety of shoes and boots to cope with it. None of the ones I own are particularly stylish, however. All are practical.

I don't care much about what other women spend their money on but I'd prefer not to labelled with the "shoe obsession" simply because I'm a woman.
 

Lavern08

Sit Down, and Shut Up!
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 14, 2009
Messages
21,790
Reaction score
7,436
Location
7th Heaven
Aruna,

We knew you meant no offense, Sweet Pea. :Hug2: