Virtual monkeys write Shakespeare

scarletpeaches · Sep 26, 2011

Not the most deep and meaningful item in P&CE I know, but there's always room for a bit of fun, right?

A few million virtual monkeys are close to re-creating the complete works of Shakespeare by randomly mashing keys on virtual typewriters.

Linky McLinkerson.

My favourite part of this article is the caption under photo #2:

Monkeys: more interested in throwing faeces than writing sonnets.

seun · Sep 26, 2011

Is today the first of April?

Diana Hignutt · Sep 26, 2011

scarletpeaches said:
Not the most deep and meaningful item in P&CE I know, but there's always room for a bit of fun, right?Linky McLinkerson.

My favourite part of this article is the caption under photo #2:

The question as I see it is:

Can you get a peck of virtual Shakespeares to throw poo eventually?

Shakesbear · Sep 26, 2011

Fair do's! Shakespeare did mention monkeys and apes ...

... for a wilderness of monkeys ...

... more new fangled than an ape ...

... and all be turned to barnacles or apes ...

.. . if the fat villain hath not transformed him ape ...

... lead apes in hell ...

Williebee · Sep 26, 2011

I like this part:

"Almost all other books, being shorter, would appear (countless times) before Shakespeare did."

Imagine the headlines:
"Monkeys reproduce the work of Williebee."
"Monkeys reproduce the work of Stephen King."
"Monkeys reproduce the works of SP, get horny and completely lose interest in doing anything other than... reproducing."

leahzero · Sep 26, 2011

scarletpeaches said:
Monkeys: more interested in throwing faeces than writing sonnets.

Sounds like they're writers already.

Vince524 · Sep 26, 2011

Williebee said:
I like this part:

"Almost all other books, being shorter, would appear (countless times) before Shakespeare did."

Imagine the headlines:
"Monkeys reproduce the work of Williebee."
"Monkeys reproduce the work of Stephen King."
"Monkeys reproduce the works of SP, get horny and completely lose interest in doing anything other than... reproducing."

Why do I have a sudden desire to read something SP wrote?

pangalactic · Sep 26, 2011

My favourite part of that article is this;

Also in 2003, Paignton Zoo carried out a practical test by putting a keyboard connected to a PC into the cage of six crested macaques. After a month the monkeys had produced five pages of the letter "S" and had broken the keyboard.

scarletpeaches · Sep 26, 2011

Given my lack of maternal urges, I'd hate to think any of my works urged people to reproduce.

Mharvey · Sep 26, 2011

Awesome. Maybe while we're at it, we can get a monkey to reproduce a half-decent query letter for my latest novel. At this point, I'll take inspiration wherever it comes from, even if Donald Maass has to wipe a bit of monkey feces off the corner.

kuwisdelu · Sep 26, 2011

Hmm, but if it were actually an infinite number of monkeys, you'd get there pretty quickly.

Y'know, after reading this, I'm slightly tempted to implement it myself.

But only slightly.

Williebee · Sep 26, 2011

Is it inappropriate to point out that I wrote this story a couple of years ago?

It is? Ok, I won't then.

kuwisdelu · Sep 26, 2011

Williebee said:
Is it inappropriate to point out that I wrote this story a couple of years ago?

It is? Ok, I won't then.

I can't count it unless you actually implemented it. If you did, send me the code. I know you're capable if you ever really had enough time to throw at it, and you know I'd be able to tell if you're bullshitting or not.

Shadow_Ferret · Sep 26, 2011

Each sequence is nine characters long and each is checked to see if that string of characters appears anywhere in the works of Shakespeare. If not, it is discarded. If it does match then progress has been made towards re-creating the works of the Bard.

To get a sense of the scale of the project, there are about 5.5 trillion different combinations of any nine characters from the English alphabet.

Wow. And I thought I knew how to waste time at work.

kuwisdelu · Sep 26, 2011

Shadow_Ferret said:
Wow. And I thought I knew how to waste time at work.

Well, to be fair, once you have it set up, you don't really have to do anything.

That's kind of the point of computers.

Shadow_Ferret · Sep 26, 2011

Not being a programmer, I have no idea. All my programs need human interaction to make them do anything.

kuwisdelu · Sep 26, 2011

Shadow_Ferret said:
Not being a programmer, I have no idea. All my programs need human interaction to make them do anything.

They probably have a GUI, too. :tongue

Jake Barnes · Sep 27, 2011

"Also in 2003, Paignton Zoo carried out a practical test by putting a keyboard connected to a PC into the cage of six crested macaques. After a month the monkeys had produced five pages of the letter "S" and had broken the keyboard."

Sounds like one of my first drafts.

Shadow_Ferret · Sep 27, 2011

kuwisdelu said:
They probably have a GUI, too.

Only if I let my chocolate bar melt onto the keyboard.

Williebee · Sep 27, 2011

kuwisdelu said:
I can't count it unless you actually implemented it. If you did, send me the code. I know you're capable if you ever really had enough time to throw at it, and you know I'd be able to tell if you're bullshitting or not.

In this case it was all bullshit... err.. fiction. Yeah, fiction, that's the ticket!

Virtual monkeys write Shakespeare

scarletpeaches

seun

Horror Man

Diana Hignutt

Very Tired

Shakesbear

knows a hawk from a handsaw

Williebee

Capeless, wingless, & yet I fly.

leahzero

The colors! THE COLORS!

Vince524

Are you gonna finish that bacon?

pangalactic

Gargling blasters

scarletpeaches

Mharvey

Liker Of Happy Things

kuwisdelu

Revolutionize the World

Williebee

Capeless, wingless, & yet I fly.

kuwisdelu

Revolutionize the World

Shadow_Ferret

Court Jester

kuwisdelu

Revolutionize the World

Shadow_Ferret

Court Jester

kuwisdelu

Revolutionize the World

Jake Barnes

Shadow_Ferret

Court Jester

Williebee

Capeless, wingless, & yet I fly.