Make Me Get the Heck Up

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JennaGlatzer

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For a couple of months, but particularly in the last week, I've had a lot of trouble getting out of bed. I know it's stress. I've taken on too much (as usual) and have tons of deadlines coming up, along with interviews scheduled.

Pretty much every day, the same thing happens. I vaguely hear the phone ring or someone leaving a message on my machine, and this little song runs through my head:

You know the song "I Wanna Be Loved By You" (just you, and nobody else but you)? Well, in my mind, it plays "I Wanna Be Left Alone."

Most of the time, it's a coauthor, editor, publicist, or agent on the machine, wanting to schedule a conference call or telling me that copyedits are coming or asking if I'm available for an 8 a.m. radio interview. I try not to weep.

I go back to sleep. At some point the alarm goes off or Anthony tries to wake me, but this never lasts unless it's a MUST GET UP day (e.g., a day when I absolutely have to be up for a call with an editor or a radio interview). When I finally do wake up on my own, I lie there arguing with myself for at least an hour, sometimes two. Today I woke up at 3 p.m., but couldn't get myself out of bed until 5. For these two hours, what went through my head was something like this:

Damn, I really should get up. I want to get that chapter done, and I need to go to Staples to get an erasable colored pencil because my editor told me I need to correct the proofs with an erasable colored pencil and she forgot to enclose one. Damn editor. I finished that book almost a year ago. Now she expects me to jump because she took her own sweet time getting to it. I hate this business.

No, I don't hate it. Get up, Jenna. I have to prep questions for that interview tomorrow, and that editor sent me questions last week, and I still haven't called back that client, and...

But it's so warm and nice here. When I get up, I'm actually going to have to do stuff. And it's going to be cold. Nope. I think I'll stay here.

No. I can't. It'll just be worse tomorrow if I waste another hour today. And I'm going away next week, so I have to write out two newsletter issues in advance. And have you seen my inbox? 426 messages that I haven't answered yet.

Yes, I have seen that inbox, and that's precisely why I've decided to just stay right here today, thank you very much. Mmm. Blankie. Pillow. They never ask me for anything.

...

See, once I'm up and about, I'm okay. But it's that dread... that crushing dread every day about all the stuff I know I have to get done...

I had improved my sleep schedule a bit toward the end of the summer, but I'm right back to my worst now. I wake up extremely late, which means there's no way I can go to sleep before dawn the next day. And it's depressing me.

So... what do you do to make yourself get up on days when you really, really don't want to get up?
 
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I don't have any answers, Jenna, but you have my sympathy. I have all sorts of trouble getting any sleep at all; I've been up the past three nights running, but when I do get some kip, I sleep in, or go all nocturnal. I'll be watching this thread to see if anyone comes up with a solution. Apart from moving to another time zone...
 

emeraldcite

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When I first moved away from home, I had a lot of trouble motivating myself. My fiance and soon-to-be daughter were four hours away and I tended to use the weekends to drive home...put a lot of miles on my car.

I hate phone calls too. They make me cringe. My blood pressure rises. Bleck.

I think I just force myself out of bed most days. I usually have two alarms set. One by me, one far, far away. You could set up a loud, annoying alarm in your living room or kitchen so you have to get up to turn it off.

That usually motivates me after a few minutes. Once you're up, you can force yourself to continue your day.
 

ChunkyC

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First, a :Hug2: for you.

Me, I've been getting up earlier and earlier. I used to sleep in, now I'm waking up nearly 2 hours before the alarm is set to go off.

Why? Good question. I know it's not work, so it has to be that book thing, I just can't wait to see what the day is going to bring.

I know, it's not helping. :tongue
 

rhymegirl

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This probably won't help you much, Jenna, but it's a lot easier to get up in the morning if you have KIDS!!!

I do not particularly like getting up at 6 am every weekday morning but I HAVE TO in order to get my son off to school. He won't get out of his bed unless I make him get up. So that is the perfect motivation for me to get up.

Maybe you could PRETEND you have kids??
 

DeniseK

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Sounds to me like you're burned out. Your health is more important than anything you have to do. Reschedule, cancel, get some guilt free R & R before you have to go away next week. Do whatever flips your trigger, but nothing related to work. If you feel like writing, write something fun and silly.

And hire an assistant. :kiss:
 

BlueTexas

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I'm with Sarah. Force yourself to take a day off and do something aimless and fun--see a movie, have drinks with friends, anything that will take your attention completely away from your real life.

And place the alarm far enough from the bed you have to get out of it to shut it off. If I didn't do that, I'd never get up. Drinking an entire bottle of water before I go to sleep helps too--true motivation to get up fast!
 

maestrowork

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:Hug2:

Seems like you're burned out, in a rut, or depressed/stressed because you're burned out or in a rut. ;)

It's time to take a vacation. Shut everything off. Leave your cell phone at home. Turn off the computer. Disconnect from the Internet. And put up a sign: DO NOT DISTURB.

Everything else can wait, including deadlines. Life, on the other hand, can't.
 

JennaGlatzer

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astonwest said:
Or some folks would probably be willing to give you theirs...
;)

LOL! Okay, who wants to lend me an early-rising child?

Yep, I know you're right about the reassessing. I've been turning down new projects like crazy, but I can't do anything about the ones I'm already contracted for, and somehow they always seem to jump out at me all at once. Two book launches on the same day, followed by the proofs of another book coming in a week later, the halfway deadline on another book days later, etc. And every now and then a new project that tears me in half to turn down... I mean, the editor in chief at Simon & Schuster offered me a celebrity bio a few weeks back and I agonized about telling her no. But I think it would have put me over the edge.

I have been watching Lost as my "guilt-free downtime" activity.

I also have PMS today, so I can factor that in.

My husband and I each have alarm clocks-- his is across the room and mine is near the bed. He set his for me today, so I did actually have to get up and walk across the room to turn it off. Yet I managed to crawl right back into bed.

I think this vacation is going to help a lot. I just hope the dread isn't even worse when I get back because more will have piled on by then!
 

reph

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1. Wear warmer nightclothes and socks so leaving the nest won't be so painful. If the bathroom floor is part of your problem, put a rug on it.

2. Look into the possibility of depression. Reluctance to get up is a classic symptom.
 

poetinahat

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reph is very right on. I knew I was in trouble when I was sleeping until 9:45 -- and I had to be at work by 8:30.

Anyway, my own thing is to set the alarm half an hour early (or more), so I can enjoy a sleep-in anyway... and turn off the TV AND computer an hour before bed, so I can actually get to sleep!

A good wake-up song helps. As The Man says,

Get up (get on up!)
Get up (get on up!)
Stay on the scene (get on up!)
-- come on now, how can you not want to groove?
 

William Haskins

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jenna, this may sound simplistic—even blunt—but suffice it to say i know a great deal about what you're going through.

here's the plan. there are three things to which you must commit:

-- when your alarm goes off, you get out of bed.

-- as soon as your feet hit the floor, you head straight to the shower.

-- once you're out of the shower, going back to bed is not an option.

after that, it's up to you. but once you take oversleeping, the grogginess of lethargic morning and self-permission to go back to bed out of the equation, you'll either be productive or bored out of your skull. either is better than what you do to yourself when you allow yourself to hide from your day.

best wishes to you.
 

biotales

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Jenna,
would my night sweats help.... or I could just lend you my menopause surges...
that seems to get my butt out of bed...
 

Dawno

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Do you like coffee in the morning? Getting a coffee maker that has an automatic timer on it to start the coffee a few minutes before your alarm goes off means that you'll smell it brewing before the alarm goes off. That provides a positive reinforcement ("mmm if I get up there will be fresh coffee!"). Even though I don't drink coffee anymore when someone is brewing it in the morning I get a good feeling from the smell.

It's not the solution but one of those other little things you can do...

I hope you get over this bump soon and feel better!
 

Susie

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Jenna, I sure hope your vacation is the best and very sorry you're having that feeling of not wanting to get out of bed. It probably is because of all your deadlines, etc. Hopefully, you'll be your young self in no time! :Hug2:
 

Unique

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Awww, Jenna...

Big hugs:Hug2: . You can borrow my early rising kid. He makes most excellent car noises - Vrooom, VROOOM, VAROOOOOM. It would make you get up if for nothing else but to make him shut up!

I've used the old 'drink a lot of water' trick. It works for me. And Will is right. Delaying the shower just delays the start of the day.

I do some virtual assistant stuff. If I can do anything that can help you - let me know. There's 4,000 of us here who want to make sure you have a most excellent vacation.
 

JennaGlatzer

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Hmm. These are good ideas. I do have an auto-timer on the coffee maker, though I never read the instruction book to know how to set it. That might be a good incentive-- I do like my coffee. Even though I'm supposed to drink decaf (caffeine sets off panic attacks), it still feels nice to wake to a warm cup.

And maybe I'll keep a robe next to the bed... I usually dash to my office, where I have a wraparound blanket, but convincing myself to get up even for those few cold seconds first is tough.

Yeah, I guess I'm a bit depressed. Nothing in comparison to the bone-crushing depression I had during my agoraphobic years, but more of a "I feel like sighing a lot" sort of depression. I managed to trap myself in my own life... and it's a good life. It's just overloaded. It feels stupid complaining sometimes. Talked to a friend of mine yesterday about how I have all these interviews about Celine coming up, and he said, "But... isn't that cool?" Yes. It's cool to get attention for something I wrote, cool to talk about someone who I admire a great deal, cool. But also exhausting when I think, "How am I ever going to write these next three books if I spend all my time talking about my last two books?" And answering e-mails. And scheduling, scheduling, scheduling.

Anyway. Thank you all so much for caring! I can't believe how many responses I have here. :kiss:
 

biotales

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But Jenna..... you did not say you wanted a the menopause thingies.... take them pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :whip: :whip:
 

Shwebb

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Jenna, you could also try light therapy.

It used to be that the light boxes were hugely expensive (some still are) but there are now full-spectrum lights that are available at next to nothing. Sam's Club has a desk version now for around $20-25. The goal is to have 30 minutes per day of 10,000 lumens. Lumens are measured by light intensity vs. distance from the light. (You could put the light either by your bed and turn it on during your snooze time--but you'd have to keep your eyes open--or you could put the light by the computer.)

Might help you through these days when we get less sun, and it might even help you even out your days/nights. Probably better than trying to switch your meds around, too.

Oh, yeah--I saw your "Celine" book in Sam's Club! Looks fabulous, except for one thing: your name could've been bigger on the cover!:)
 

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i know my reply probably won't help you much, but while reading through your posts, Jenna, i thought to myself, "This is what all us writers are striving for and here's Jenna...she has made it in the bizz, has assignments galore, has many books published with well known publishing houses, etc. This is what most of us want, wish for and here's Jenna not wanting to do it..."

i'm not trying to knock you, i was just thinking how crazy it is how most of us here only wish we could be where you're at in your writing career, we dream of the day to have our book published and how when a person goes through having the dream to having that dream come true, how we are faced with a whole new set of obstacles.

all the suggestions given are good ones. just try to take it easy, don't overwhelm yourself with anymore projects and just take care of one thing at a time.

- Mrs.Firefly
 

maestrowork

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JennaGlatzer said:
I think this vacation is going to help a lot. I just hope the dread isn't even worse when I get back because more will have piled on by then!

Things will pile up and that's #1 reason why most busy people don't take vacation. They dread coming back to the bigger pile. But you know what, that's why we have vacation, so when we come back, we're recharged and ready to take on the biggest pile....

Practically, there are times when I don't want to get out of bed, or I'd go back to bed and just don't want to do anything else. I know I'm depressed. I want to snap out of it. But I need to really yell at myself, "Get up now! Or else" or I'd linger in bed for hours. Finally I have to say, "this is ridiculous. I'm not going to be depressed. I am healthy and I have a good life. I can fight this. I can do this." Then I'd literally bounce off the bed and dash to the shower. It works for me, but not without effort.
 

rhymegirl

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Jenna,
Along with Unique, I am willing to let you borrow my early rising son. Just have him back by Christmas. :)
 

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I have the opposite reaction to stress. I wake up at about 4 a.m. in a panic. Sometimes I can get myself back to sleep, but often I get up and get to work. I simply can't sleep and feel so upset for not having something finished. I often wake up before my alarm clock (which is set for 4:40 a.m.) in the anticipation of all that needs to be done.

Now, once I wake up, it doesn't seem so pressing. I can procrastinate all day, only to wake up in a panic attack the next morning. :Shrug:
 
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