How-To: Trip Over Your Cat

My cat runs ahead of me, lies in wait, then pounces on my feet as I walk by.

My cat is not fitted with brakelights* and refuses to give any warning signal that he is about to stop right in front of my feet.

Collisions are inevitable.

*Headlamps work okay, though

1. Walk down hall carrying pile of precariously-balanced objects
2. Fail to notice paper/tissue/postcard flutter off top of pile and land temptingly on floor
3. Remain unaware that kitty is devising path to devilishly-fun flutter-thing around and between human's moving feet
4. Get feet tangled in fast-moving kitty-ness

Optional (for either party):
- Loud, surprised vocalizations
- Concluding it was the other one's fault

3) Place cat in the middle of your route on the floor

Click to expand...

This should be "Place cat anywhere BUT the middle of your route on the floor. The cat will move to your route on its own.

Ben, former cat ownee.

First, I put a laundry basket in my arms.

Second, I begin to walk down hallway.

Third, my stealth cat runs ahead of me then proceeds to walk a pace slower than me under the basket where he can't be seen.

And, finally, the trip.


Bonusdorkamus: Mr. Bright (cat) likes to jump out in front of me in the hall when he hears me coming so he can lead me to his bowl of food. He's neurotic and likes me to bring some fresh food down from his container so he can eat it. He doesn't like the stale stuff that's been sitting there waiting for him to gobble down. I have to run my finger up past the old food and bring down some new stuff or he'll just sit there and look at me for hours until I do it. I have to do this several times a day.

*takes notes*

this information will come in handy

Step One: Put cats up for the night.
Step Two: Forget that a kid you were watching opened the back door to that room and left it open.
Step Three: Turn off all the lights and walk around brushing your teeth.
Step Four: Trip because he was walking on your heels like he usually does.
Step Five: Have a heart attack.
Step Six: Realize your mistake, throw cat back into the cat room and make sure both doors are shut.

That's what happened last night.

Cats seem to have a special talent for tripping people, or at least getting tangled up in their masters' legs. Sometimes I get the uneasy feeling that it's the first stage in a sinister scheme for world domination...

Step 1. Get married, inherit cat
Step 2. Buy dog, allow dog free run of house.
Step 3. Cat hides downstairs all day.
Step 4. Profit???

lucidzfl said:

Step 1. Get married, inherit cat
Step 2. Buy dog, allow dog free run of house.
Step 3. Cat hides downstairs all day.
Step 4. Profit???

Click to expand...

I think Alleycat is going to ban you for this.

A sure-fire way to trip over my cat is to walk into the bathroom when he's thirsty.

He'll run full-speed in that direction, which involves going around a corner no matter which direction he comes from. Thus, you're halfway through the door, about to turn left, and he runs straight through your legs.

It's all because he likes to drink from the sink tap. He never drinks water that's been sitting out for him. He'd rather be thirsty, and wait until such point when someone is going to the bathroom.

Or another way to trip is to go to make a morning coffee with blurry eyes. The kettle is near his food bowl, so chances are he'll weave in-between your feet several times, hoping you'll give him fresh food instead of his day-old stuff.

Silly cat.

My cat tries to drag me out of bed by the hair in the morning so I'll feed him.

you forgot ...

1. Own or borrow a cat.

Guess I'll never trip over one .... DAMN !!!!

My cat growing up:

- Magically appeared under my feet.

I don't have a cat but I can come up with something on the assumtion I get over my cat allergies and own one at some point.

1. Possess cat
2. Carry a really expensive piece of tech.
3. Try not to let cat see how shiny it is.
4. Fail miserably by not realizing the beam of light the sun makes through the curtains.
5. Cat waits on kitchen table.
6. Walk past making sure that the beam of light is still hitting the tech.
7. Cat Pounce.
8. Lose Balance and fall
9. Scream cuss words as your new $1000+ Mac just got owned.
10. Debate getting kerosene and dowsing cat before putting it into a room a lit candles.
11. Prepare for cat face.
12. End up forgetting about and just getting a new piece of tech... Or switching over to Linux.
13. Live happy ever after with your cat with out resorting to flame accelerators

NOTE: No cats or computers were harmed in the making of this tutorial on how to trip over cats.

Button said:

Step One: Put cats up for the night.
Step Two: Forget that a kid you were watching opened the back door to that room and left it open.
Step Three: Turn off all the lights and walk around brushing your teeth.
Step Four: Trip because he was walking on your heels like he usually does.
Step Five: Have a heart attack.
Step Six: Realize your mistake, throw cat back into the cat room and make sure both doors are shut.

That's what happened last night.

Click to expand...

whatadork!

- Own black cat
- come home late in the evening.
- Open door, with lightswitch a few tantalising steps away
- Take step
- Step on black cat.

- Decide to get one cat.
- People won't separate siblings, so take a plugne and take two cats.
- Be ignorant that one of them is pregnant.
- End up with four cats. (Sigh of relief. Could have been much worse.)
- Walk anywhere near the kitchen. The chance to trip over at least one cat = 99.9 %.

Zen, and the art of tripping over your cat. Just do it.

Don had an outside cat who runs up his very long front steps and then lays down right on the porch daring you to step on him. The first few times, cat was so quick that we almost tripped over him. Now, we're on to him and just pick him up and pet him.

My cat Buddy likes to sit by their Petmate water fountain in the kitchen watching the water come out. If I'm not paying attention, I'll step on his tail, or even almost trip over it.