Am I allowed to claim professional interest?

as a lesbian who writes far more gay male characters than lesbian ones, I mean ;-;

My reasoning behind all the dudes is that from the reactions I seem to get when I tell someone I'm lesbian seem generally more positive than what my gay male friends receive. (other reasoning is below, about enjoying and getting into a male character more)

Some have even been hit.

I've had obnoxious straight males trying to pick me up anyhow, which is still more positive (though unwanted) attention than a punch in the face.

I personally would rather the failed flirts than violence.

(also please correct me if I'm wrong: people working on a computer at a placed like panera = not open for flirtations anyway? it seems to be where I pick up some weird guys...not that pretty, to be honest)

I've written mxm erotica and relationship stuff for years.

some of it is posted on the net.
Most of what is posted on the net is like 4-5+ years old though so is kind of crappy. also it stars Siegfried and Roy...not a prideful moment in my life...I now only do original stuff and when I open my old Siegfried and Roy writing I cringe (not because it's fanfic...) but because I rushed and did it sloppy.

Ok the point is (my one friend raised this point) in a straight couple a lesbian can block out the penis. In two dudes...that ain't happing.

Why write it?

I think I write it because male characters (not always real men...) have always been more endearing to me and more fun to write, and that kind of thing. (I may have some gender disorientation going on...shhh)

Do I have to write sexytimes for personal pleasure?

Confusion, Panic, Disorder. help?

that doesn't solve the problem of I feel like I shouldn't be allowed to write gay dudes doing anything other than existing. Should I feel that way? Does me being a lesbian mean my gay male characters should go away and be side characters and bring on the lesbian characters?

I don't think it should. But I have a whole peanut gallery of friends who say otherwise.

:/ it's very disconcerting.

I write what comes to mind. Not what makes me happy. Is that wrong?

If I wrote what made me happy all the time, it'd be pages and pages and pages of sex scenes involving my one princess character and her husband (or thrown together with females in the novels) and pretending to be the husband in my head. (because the princess is my type)

I don't even want to touch the rest of that post.