I'm different (Be checking latest Page for updates)
See any gentle-spirited, well-spoken, shy male person and the first thought of any average person is that that man cannot be heterosexual since heterosexual men are meant to be crass, silly, outgoing and arrogant, an average Fred Flintstone. See any woman who enjoys sports, prefer pants over skirts and doesn't care about looking like Cindy Crawford, the average person thinks that woman could possibly a Lesbian. You wouldn't say John Barrowman (openly gay actor who plays Captain Jack Harkness in Torchwood) is not manly, but you would certainly say straight actor David Niven wasn't, at the same time, you can't say openly Lesbian actress and Ellen DeGeneres' wife Portia De Rossi is not feminine, but wrestler Chyna, who is straight, is not feminine.
Me? I never cared about soccer as a child, cried during half of my birthday parties since I felt bad they would always beat the piñatas (what has the piñata done to you???) and felt more comfortable going to a party wearing a bowtie, suspenders and a jacket than simply shirts, jeans and hair on whatever fashion was going on (When I was a kid, I was mocked by other kids because I wanted to wear ties and tuxs on celebrations. If girls have the right to look as princesses, why boys don't have said right to look like princes?).
I preferred to watch The Neverending Story than going to a school party when I was 6, wondered why women could wear make-up but men couldn't when I was 7. I was bullied in Middle school for being a loner and was teased, with the nickname The Priest for being quiet, smart, shy and wearing the shirt buttons all the way up. I saw Mishima when I was 10 and felt related, saw it again last month and I still feel related.
I thought I was gay when I was 14 and told mom in middle of mass just to excuse myself saying it was a bad taste joke, realized I am not gay since I like women far, far more than men but nonetheless couldn't see why a woman would prefer a meek man. When I was 17, I thought of becoming a priest, not because I was very religious, just because I felt they had a nice job, helped around a lot and a strong guild.
And that's just not even half of it.
I'm different, and learning to accept that has helped me to remove a big weight from my shoulders. A lot of guilt gone. I like dominant women, especially if they look like men and effemitive men especially if they look like women, at the same time I find the idea of having sex (with anyone) a tad scary, awkward and intimidatory.
I am who I am, I am different and whoever or whatever I turn out to be in life, I hope and wish to be respected for who I am.
See any gentle-spirited, well-spoken, shy male person and the first thought of any average person is that that man cannot be heterosexual since heterosexual men are meant to be crass, silly, outgoing and arrogant, an average Fred Flintstone. See any woman who enjoys sports, prefer pants over skirts and doesn't care about looking like Cindy Crawford, the average person thinks that woman could possibly a Lesbian. You wouldn't say John Barrowman (openly gay actor who plays Captain Jack Harkness in Torchwood) is not manly, but you would certainly say straight actor David Niven wasn't, at the same time, you can't say openly Lesbian actress and Ellen DeGeneres' wife Portia De Rossi is not feminine, but wrestler Chyna, who is straight, is not feminine.
Me? I never cared about soccer as a child, cried during half of my birthday parties since I felt bad they would always beat the piñatas (what has the piñata done to you???) and felt more comfortable going to a party wearing a bowtie, suspenders and a jacket than simply shirts, jeans and hair on whatever fashion was going on (When I was a kid, I was mocked by other kids because I wanted to wear ties and tuxs on celebrations. If girls have the right to look as princesses, why boys don't have said right to look like princes?).
I preferred to watch The Neverending Story than going to a school party when I was 6, wondered why women could wear make-up but men couldn't when I was 7. I was bullied in Middle school for being a loner and was teased, with the nickname The Priest for being quiet, smart, shy and wearing the shirt buttons all the way up. I saw Mishima when I was 10 and felt related, saw it again last month and I still feel related.
I thought I was gay when I was 14 and told mom in middle of mass just to excuse myself saying it was a bad taste joke, realized I am not gay since I like women far, far more than men but nonetheless couldn't see why a woman would prefer a meek man. When I was 17, I thought of becoming a priest, not because I was very religious, just because I felt they had a nice job, helped around a lot and a strong guild.
And that's just not even half of it.
I'm different, and learning to accept that has helped me to remove a big weight from my shoulders. A lot of guilt gone. I like dominant women, especially if they look like men and effemitive men especially if they look like women, at the same time I find the idea of having sex (with anyone) a tad scary, awkward and intimidatory.
I am who I am, I am different and whoever or whatever I turn out to be in life, I hope and wish to be respected for who I am.
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