Losing Hope

Aw. Try not to worry. I've had 4 rejections (9 others are reading) and I started fretting about my agent dumping me. I told her this and she sent me the sweetest e-mail saying that wasn't going to happen.

I know what you mean about it being hard to concentrate on the WIP. I'm finding that too.

callalily61 said:

Every house in my first round passed. We sold on round 2. Chocolate, booze, and training myself not to look at the passes helped.

Click to expand...

Ooh, not looking at the passes is a good idea. I've been torturing myself with the feedback!

I've gotten good reviews from the editors to whom my agent has submitted so far, including one review that made me want to kiss said editor silly. Unfortunately, his house was already pushing a roughly similar series.

Oh well. It's a complicated process, with lots of moving parts. I make sure to work on the WIP every day, and I'll soon be sending it to the agent and starting work on the next WIP.

I control what I do. It's useless to beat myself up over what others do, or do not.

Have you thought of asking your agent not to share the info with you?

My agent works with the policy that if I want to know, he'll let me know, but I have to ask first. The other day I did talk to him and he told me how things were going. There was only one rejection so far, but he didn't tell me much about it, just that they had good things to say but it wasn't right for their audience.

I'm sure if I asked him, he'd have shown me the rejection, but truth is I don't want to know right now. Maybe after it sells (or if it doesn't) then I'll ask to see the comments that were made, but I know that if I see them, even if they're nice, it'll still hurt.

That's why my agent does things this way, because it's so easy to get caught up in the negativity and stress over it. I can guarantee you that not having the knowledge has decreased my stress levels immensely.

Why not talk to your agent and let her know that you're having a tough time with it, and ask her to hold off on sending you the rejections for now. If you want to see them at some point you can always ask, but honestly, what good does it do you to even know about it? All it does is make you worry more.

I truly do think it might be worth discussing with her, especially if it's affecting your work.

Don't ever lose hope. I've read about stories that are bestseller now that have had 20+ rejections. Besides, those opinions that those agents gave you, it seems like they're not saying necessarily that it sucks, it just didn't satisfy their personal tastes and preferences. Besides, agent's can't accept all submissions. They just can't. It's just not possible. You know what you're doing, otherwise you would've never been published, and you have, so hang in there, and don't ever lose hope. Champions never, ever stop fighting. They fight for what they want until their very last breath, and even if they die and don't get what they want, at least no one can say they accepted defeat lying down.

LMC—It's been oft-repeated around these parts, but I was on sub for a year. Small batches. Many rounds. Some close calls. Many rejections.

It's a very tough business, but keep in mind, it only takes one "yes."

Hang in there, Lisa. So many here have good advice. Hard to follow, I know, but you're way ahead fo so many more here who are just trying to land an agent (100 queries: 42 rejections including 2 partials and a full and the rest, no response). If I ever do sign with an agent, I will go kaitie's way for sure. Don't want to know.

An agent isn't just for one work. She/He is for your writing career (hopefully). And if your agent is giving you the impression she's just there for one book and if it doesn't sell she's out . . . I think that's not a good agent.

My agent took me on with two books - a very marketable YA (or so we thought) and a very not marketable Adult. We exhausted ALL YA publishers with the YA - and despite a few close calls, we have to put the book aside (for now). The Adult is still making the rounds, getting the kind of rejections we anticipated (great, but too difficult for this current climate). We are still finding options, submitting to smaller houses, even different countries. Meanwhile my agent and I had meetings about what else I could write that WOULD sell. We came up with one awesome idea, but then I had an even better one. I called her, we talked about it, and she came up with the plan to sell it on proposal to a particular editor she had in mind. That book is now coming out Fall 2012. That is the FOURTH book we've been working on together.

Never for a minute did I worry that if that first YA didn't sell she'd drop me. Never for a minute has she given up hope that someday (maybe after the sold YA comes out) that that first YA would find a home. Never for a minute has she made me feel bad for coming at her with suggestion after suggestion for the difficult Adult book.

Rejections are a part of this business. An agent doesn't guarantee a book sale. You have to decide as an author if you are willing to put up with the bad in order to get the good. You will be rejected, maybe for years. I have a friend who couldn't sell her YA for forever, and finally after publishing a totally different YA series, that other YA just came out last week.

I know it's tough. Trust me, I feel deep pain with every rejection. But it's truly just how the cookie crumbles. It's very very very normal to be rejected. Even at the "I have an agent" stage. What you are going through, we have all gone through. And while I know how hard it is to work on another project while feeling so frustrated and just plain sad, that's the lot of an author. The only control we have over our career are the books we write. I wouldn't have a book deal now, if I allowed my sadness at being rejected so much and so often prevent me from writing. I'd just be depressed. So take control, and start work on something that is so totally awesome. You are capable of it, and quite prolific. I know you can do it. And you'll be so proud of yourself that you did.

Hope better news is in your future, and success is a constant companion--best wishes!!!

i know how the near misses felt- Do not have an agent yet but had some pretty big doors open then close- One writer even got me in directly with a major publisher who loved it but said there were not taking children's books now...I am going to work with an editor then send to many agents- I am trusting if it is meant to be it will happen..
know that too.

Look at it this way: at least you have an agent. That puts you about a billion miles ahead of a lot of other writers.

At least you were able to obtain an agent. Unlike you, I'm trapped within the first step.Talk about losing true hope, I won't even get the chance to show the world a story I feel they'll like.

Hope is located directly across Cook Inlet from Bird, about five miles, visible on a clear day, twenty miles south of Anchorage, Alaska. It hasn't been lost.

caw

Nothing to add except my good wishes. Hang in there.

I second the idea of not getting rejection comments. Unless there's a consensus and you need to change anything about the book, it's really not helpful.

My first book didn't sell. I wrote another one. One foot in front of the other, you know?

Lmc. It's a tough business. Hang in there!

OMG

You mean once I go through the hell of getting an agent, there's more hell to go through?

Seems to me like hell is expanding at a prodigious rate.

Pass the bottle boys. I might need a bit more persuading to stay on this path.

Just kidding. Most writers go through many hells....and come out the other side with a story to be proud of.

Hang in there.

Esmeralda said:

You mean once I go through the hell of getting an agent, there's more hell to go through?

Click to expand...

I'm with you Esmeralda. I can barely take the torture of this first round. I hadn't even thought about the next round, figuring it'd be relatively smooth sailing once you got an agent. Apparently not...