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maestrowork
04-14-2007, 07:42 AM
Post them here.

"Obey my authoratah!" -- South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut.

Shadow_Ferret
04-14-2007, 07:48 AM
I don't recall the movie, it was some awful B movie I saw at a drive-in back in the 70s. But there was this drunk character and he was interacting with this snooty non-drinker. The non-drinker said they didn't drink and the drunk replied, "You mean when you get up in the morning, that's the best you're going to feel for the rest of the day?"

Odd, how that's all I remember. *takes a sip of his beer*

Lyxdeslic
04-14-2007, 07:49 AM
Well, from low brow to high brow:

"I piss excellence!" -- Ricky Bobby from Talladega Nights

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!" -- Rhett Butler from Gone With the Wind.

Novelust
04-14-2007, 07:54 AM
You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha...

*THUNK*

BiggerBoat
04-14-2007, 10:12 AM
"You're gonna' need a--"

< Ah, hell. Just look at my Avatar

ShapeSphere
04-14-2007, 10:25 AM
Bart (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001476/): I better go check out this Mongo character.
[Bart reaches for his gun]
Jim (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000698/): Oh no, don't do that.
Bart (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001476/): Why not?
Jim (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000698/): If you shoot him, you'll just make him mad.

(Blazing Saddles. Anything from that film is great.)

dpaterso
04-14-2007, 10:47 AM
Name 10 or more film titles and I'll give ya a rep point...

Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.

I should have guessed. When my men didn't come back I should have guessed. How many of you did they hire?

You eat one lousy foot and they call you a cannibal. What a world!

When the music ends, pick up your gun. Go ahead and shoot me Colonel. Just try.

Look how he glares at me... If he wasn't fathered by the black ram in the full of the moon my name is not Ragnar.

It's an ugly planet. It's a bug planet.

Why, by God, girl, that's a Colt's Dragoon! You're no bigger than a corn nubbin, what're you doing with all this pistol?

To kill a man you shoot him in the heart. Isn't that what you said, Ramon?

This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight... turbulence and then explode.

You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy?

My mother was a pure woman from a noble family. And I, at least, know who my father is, you pig-eating son of a whore!

Bio-readouts are all in the green, looks like she's alive. Well, there goes our salvage, guys.

Your Honor, may I have permission to treat Ms. Vito as a hostile witness?
You think I'm hostile now, wait 'til you see me tonight.

Now, Kiddo, one of the things I always liked about you is you appear wise beyond your years. Then allow me to impart a word to the wise. Whatever - WHAT-EVER - Pai Mei says, obey. If you flash him, even for an instant, a defiant eye, he'll pluck it out. And if you throw any American sass his way, he will snap your back and your neck like they were twigs, and that will be the story of you.

There's a contract out on your life. Believe me. I was hired to kill you, but I'm not going to do it. It's either because I'm in love with your daughter or because I have a newfound respect for life.

Can't quite remember how you got squatter's rights in here, anyhow. Seems to me you came by one night to ask for an extra blanket and stayed a year.

That's no moon. It's a space station.

I walked right to that office -- that's what I did -- and I reached across that desk and I grabbed him by his fat head and I said, "Listen, man! I'm not going to jail for you or for anybody!"

You mean, you'll put down your rock, and I'll put down my sword, and we'll try to kill each other like civilized people?

A silver stake? A crucifix? What, did you think we haven't tried everything before? We've shot him, stabbed him, clubbed him, sprayed him with holy water, staked him through the heart, and STILL he lives! Do you understand? No-one knows how to kill Dracula!

Where did you learn to fight with furniture?
On the playing fields of Eton!

I want Hatcher dead. I want his family dead. And if you can't kill him, I go kill him, and then I'm gonna kill you.

What I offer you is freedom; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical dream; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical law; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical God.

If you do not speak English, I am at your disposal with 187 other languages along with their various dialects and sub-tongues.

Butch and me have been talking it all over. Wherever the hell Bolivia is, that's where we're off to.

I'm so scared my bones are clicking like dice on a Reno crap table. I should be back in Hollywood, sitting at my typewriter.

I'm an angel. I kill newborns while their mamas watch. I turn cities into salt. And occasionally, when I feel like it, I tear little girls apart. And from now till kingdom come... the only thing you can count on... in your existence... is never understanding why.

You've come to Nottingham once too often!
When this is over, my friend, there'll be no need for me to come again!

-Derek

Stacia Kane
04-14-2007, 03:07 PM
She's a f*cking b*tch, Lloyd.

Dpaterso, I'm pretty sure you've got Space Balls(?), Men in Black, My Cousin Vinnie, Big Trouble in Little China, and Star Wars...I'm sure of Vinne and Little China, but not so much on the others.

Captain Scarf
04-14-2007, 03:31 PM
dpaterso:

Only got five I'm afraid:

The Big Bus
For A Few Dollars More
Starship Troopers
Star Wars (New Hope)
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid


Favourite quote:

"We busted our arses getting here, half my men are dead and you're just going to sit here. . . AND DRINK TEA!"

robeiae
04-14-2007, 04:15 PM
Hey, I can do that:

We deal in lead, friend.

To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich...

Is this gonna be a stand-up fight sir, or another bughunt?

Keep ten for yourself. Go and get yourself a nice piece of ass.

Are you not entertained?

You're a cantaloupe.

Hand me the ****ing keys, you ****sucker, what the ****?

Your husband ain't dead, lady. He's hidin'.

Female alien?

Gee, I'm real sorry your mom blew up, Ricky.

'Cause you're smalll. Small. S M all.

It's a jelly.

Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia...he was an English guy, he came to fight the Turkish...

kristie911
04-14-2007, 04:21 PM
"You're gonna' need a--"

< Ah, hell. Just look at my Avatar

Damn, he took mine.

Jaws is my favorite movie...and that's my favorite quote. :)

Susan Gable
04-14-2007, 04:24 PM
"Never give up! Never surrender!"

"The guy who wrote this scene should be shot!"

"It's my way, or the highway."

"May the Schwartz be with you!"

Susan G.

seun
04-14-2007, 05:50 PM
Orange wip? Orange wip? Three orange wips (Blues Brothers)

I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti (Silence of the Lambs)

For a minute there I thought we were in trouble (Butch Cassidy)

They're dead. They're all messed up (Night of the Living Dead)

37. My girlfriend sucked 37 dicks! (Clerks)
In a row?

Jersey Chick
04-14-2007, 06:08 PM
"Inconceivable
You keep saying that word. I do not think it means what you think it means." -The Princess Bride

"You put your little deer lips down to the cool water... and BAM! A f***in' bullet! Your brains are lyin' on the ground in little bloody pieces! Now I ask you, would you give a s*** what kind of pants the son of a bitch that shot you was wearin'?" - My Cousin Vinny

"There's no crying in baseball!" - A League of Their Own

"Whoa... Wrong book..." Army of Darkness

ChaosTitan
04-14-2007, 06:17 PM
Name 10 or more film titles and I'll give ya a rep point...

Ooooh, a challenge. Let's see....(and these are out of order)....

Serenity, Saving Private Ryan, Star Wars, the Princess Bride, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Gross Pointe Blank (!), A Fistful of Dollars, For A Few Dollars More (you've got a thing for Eastwood movies, eh?), Starship Troopers, Aliens, My Cousin Vinny, Van Helsing, Kill Bill, The Prophecy.

The rest I don't know. :tongue

Godfather
04-15-2007, 02:33 AM
i know it's a documentary but

i don't mind being shot man, i just don't dig being told about it

dancingandflying
04-15-2007, 02:54 AM
V: [Evey pulls out her mace] I can assure you I mean you no harm.
Evey Hammond: Who are you?
V: Who? Who is but the form following the function of what and what I am is a man in a mask.
Evey Hammond: Well I can see that.
V: Of course you can. I'm not questioning your powers of observation I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is.
Evey Hammond: Oh. Right.
V: But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace sobriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatis persona.
V: Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition.
[carves V into poster on wall]
V: The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.
[giggles]
V: Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.
Evey Hammond: Are you like a crazy person?
V: I am quite sure they will say so. But, to whom am I speaking with?
Evey Hammond: I'm Evey.
V: Evey? E-V. Of course you are.
Evey Hammond: What does that mean?
V: It means that I, like God, do not play with dice and I don't believe in coincidences.

- v for vendetta. and look at my sig.

:D d and f.

Serenity
04-15-2007, 03:08 AM
"You wanna run this ship?"
"Yes."
"Well... you can't." (Serenity)


"Come see the violence inherent in the system!! Help! I'm being repressed!" (Monty Python and the Holy Grail)


"You actually go out in these things?"
"Well, what would you prefer, yellow spandex?" (X-Men)


"Hey! O'Connell! It looks to me like I've got all the horses!"
"Hey! Beni! Looks like you're on the wrong side of the river!" (The Mummy)

Anonymisty
04-15-2007, 06:19 AM
"Next time, Dr Jones, it will take more than children to save you!"
--- "Raiders of the Lost Ark"

"Right. I'll need boot black."
"I have boot black."
"With you?"
"A scuff, sir, is a dreadful thing."
--- "Stage Beauty"

"Elizabeth, these clothes do not become you at all. It should be a dress or nothing. I happen to have nothing at all in my cabin."
--- Captain Jack Sparrow, "Pirates of the
Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest"

"Why is the rum gone?"
---Captain Jack Sparrow, "Pirates of the Caribbean:
Curse of the Black Pearl"

Toothpaste
04-15-2007, 06:38 AM
Ooh some excellent ones. But this is one of my favs:

"I shall call him squishy and he shall be mine, and he shall be my squishy."

Dory. Finding Nemo.

ChaosTitan
04-15-2007, 06:59 AM
"We all go a little mad sometimes." --Psycho/Scream

"This landing is going to get pretty interesting."
"Define interesting."
"Oh God, oh God, we're all going to die?" --Serenity

"Let's be bad guys." --Serenity

"I suppose you'll use this drama as a reason to have another affair. I feel sorry for the next delivery man that comes to this house!" --The Ref

"It is the key to the greatest treasure in all the land!"
"This means you've always been my one true love because it's just the right size!"
"It's not the size that counts... It's how you use it!" --Robin Hood: Men in Tights

"Out of order? F*ck! Even in the future nothing works." --Spaceballs

"Who the hell are you?"
"I'm the guy that's gonna save your--" *is eaten by a monster*
--Feast

"Hey, don't look at me, I ain't bitin' no more butts." --Mulan

McDuff
04-15-2007, 07:52 AM
I only got 9 on the list:

For a Few Dollars More
Starship Troopers
Serenity
Saving Private Ryan
Kill Bill vol 2
Star Wars
Van Helsing
First Knight
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

As to my favourites, well:

"Shut the fuck up Donny, you're out of your element!"

"I'd like to wish you both good luck, we're all counting on you."

"Say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism, at least it's an ethos."

"Excuse me, Stewardess? I speak Jive."

"Obviously you're not a golfer."


OK, so I'm limited in my choice of movies. I mainly couldn't believe that nobody had used either of these yet!

Cassie88
04-15-2007, 08:15 AM
You want me to hold the chicken?!

Yeah, I want you to hold it between your kneeeees!

DragonHeart
04-15-2007, 05:22 PM
That's no moon. It's a space station.

That one's from Twister.


"There will come a moment when you will have a chance to show it. To do the right thing."
"I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by."

"You hired me. It's not my fault your standards are lax."
"You smell funny."

"Why is the rum always gone?...Oh. That's why."

Yeah...that's all I have for the moment. Another coffee or three and I'm sure I can add at least a few more to my list. :D

~DragonHeart~

maestrowork
04-15-2007, 06:06 PM
"Show me you c***." -- Clive Owen to Natalie Portman in Closer.

William Haskins
04-15-2007, 10:43 PM
GEISLER
Look, you're confused? You need guidance? Talk to another writer.

BARTON
Who?

GEISLER
Jesus, throw a rock in here, you'll hit one. And do me a favor, Fink: Throw it hard.

Cav Guy
04-15-2007, 11:25 PM
My favorite's in my sig line.

Derek: I got the following titles for you:

Fistful of Dollars
For a Few Dollars More
2001: A Space Odyssey
Star Wars Ep. 5 - A New Hope
Serenity
Butch Cassidey and the Sundance Kid
Saving Private Ryan
Starship Troopers
True Grit (I think)
Van Helsing
First Knight
Spaceballs

robeiae
04-15-2007, 11:56 PM
What is this, the high hat?

blacbird
04-16-2007, 12:14 AM
Five of mine:

"I can explain everything" -- Billy Bibbitt (Brad Dourif), after the wild party in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

"Think you used enough dynamite there, Butch?" -- Sundance Kid (Robert Redford), to Paul Newman right after they blew the rail car to smithereens trying to blow open the safe. -- Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

"Sometimes the magic works, and sometimes it doesn't." -- Old Lodge Skins (Chief Dan George), to Little Big Man (Dustin Hoffman), after his attempt to lie down and die fails. -- Little Big Man

"Stand up, Jean Louise. Your father's passin'." -- actor unknown, to Scout Finch, from the blacks-only balcony of the courthouse at the end of the trial of Tom Robinson, in To Kill a Mockingbird.

"You slut." -- Bill Murray to roommate Dustin Hoffman, in Tootsie, when Hoffman explains to him in a panic that he has imminent simultaneous dates with two men who believe he's a woman.

caw

citymouse
04-16-2007, 01:03 AM
German ambassador: "You left Poland at the start of the war. Why?"
Baroness Somebody: "Bombs were falling. I though I might get in the way."
C

Lady Esther
04-16-2007, 02:35 AM
"You mean to tell me you went home and swiped a ball that was signed by Babe Ruth, and you brought it out here and actually played with it!" (The Sandlot)

"Am I not Merciful!" (Gladiator)

"Oh look, I got gum on my seat, gum!" (Speed)

"I am Angela Bennett!" (The Net)

"I am Egypt. And Egypt is yours for one night only." (Cleopatra-1999)

"No need to ask your name... Red hair and a hand-me-down robe... You must be a Weasley." (Harry Potter)

"You need a mommy very, very badly!" (Hook)

"Hey, Mr. Wilson!" (Dennis the Menace)

"You're what the French call 'Les incompetent'." (Home Alone)

"The principal is insane. She threw a girl over the fence by her hair." (Matilda)

"Sit. Up. Straight. You're slouching." (Anywhere But Here)

"Why should he talk if we can't protect him!" (The Client)

-"Doesn't designing all these wedding gowns make you think about getting married... or at least make you think about the F word."
-"The F word!"
-"My father."
-"Oh that F word!" (The Parent Trap)

...Just to name a few.

MattW
04-16-2007, 08:02 AM
"In the pantry, right next to my bottle of dick cream....Uh, wait. Forget that last part."

Bmwhtly
04-16-2007, 12:32 PM
Name 10 or more film titles and I'll give ya a rep point...I'll have a crack at it.


I should have guessed. When my men didn't come back I should have guessed. How many of you did they hire?The Magnificent Seven


When the music ends, pick up your gun. Go ahead and shoot me Colonel. Just try. A few Dollars more


It's an ugly planet. It's a bug planet.Starship Trooper


To kill a man you shoot him in the heart. Isn't that what you said, Ramon?A fistful of dollars


This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight... turbulence and then explode.Serenity


You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy?Saving Private ryan


Bio-readouts are all in the green, looks like she's alive. Well, there goes our salvage, guys.Aliens


Now, Kiddo, one of the things I always liked about you is you appear wise beyond your years. Then allow me to impart a word to the wise. Whatever - WHAT-EVER - Pai Mei says, obey. If you flash him, even for an instant, a defiant eye, he'll pluck it out. And if you throw any American sass his way, he will snap your back and your neck like they were twigs, and that will be the story of you.Kill Bill vol.2


That's no moon. It's a space station.Star Wars


If you do not speak English, I am at your disposal with 187 other languages along with their various dialects and sub-tongues.Star Wars?


Butch and me have been talking it all over. Wherever the hell Bolivia is, that's where we're off to.I'm guessing Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

Eleven? If they're right, that's cool!



To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich...Kelly's Heroes


Is this gonna be a stand-up fight sir, or another bughunt?Aliens


Are you not entertained?Gladiator


You're a cantaloupe.True Romance


Hand me the ****ing keys, you ****sucker, what the ****?Reservoir Dogs

He, that was fun. Now on to more important matters.

"We were attacked, by huge F***in' howlin' things! - Dog Soldiers

"Don't hit him in the nuts"
"You said anything goes"
"Anything goes, but he'll take it personally" - X-Men

"I fell back and broke my foot"
"ornery old fool"
"well, that cuban cigar got me all riled up"- Open Range

"She could be a bigger germ farm than that monkey in Outbreak!" - Chasing Amy

"I'm running this monkey farm now Frankenstein, and I wanna know what the **** you're doing with my time!" - Day of the Dead

"Hey, I don't need you. Sixty feet of bridge I can pick up almost anywhere, schmuk" - Kelly's Heroes

Quint's Indianapolis speech from Jaws.

"Just get us on the ground"
"That part'll happen pretty definitely" - Serenity.

"I couldn't see him. I'm not made of eyes" - Hot Fuzz

"F**kadoodledo" - Shaun of the Dead

Shaun: You're the one who's gone from being a chartered accountant to Charlton Heston
David: I'm not a chartered accountant
Shaun: Well, you look like one.
David: I'm a lecturer
Shaun: You're a twat.

"I don't think it's nice you laughing" - Fistful of dollars

"I dunno what's in there, but it's wierd and pissed off" - The Thing

I think that'll do for now.

jonereb
04-16-2007, 03:42 PM
JEREMIAH JOHNSON:
"Do you know how to skin griz, pilgrim?"
"I can skin most anything."
"You sure are cocky for a starvin' pilgrim."

(Upon finding a man buried to his neck, Jeremiah asks:)
"Who did this to you? Indians?
"Tweren't Mormans."

TRUE GRIT:
"Ned, I am to kill you in one minute -- or see you hanged in Fort Smith at Judge Parker's convenience. Which shall it be?"
"I call that bold talk for a one-eyed fat man."

pamelajo
04-16-2007, 03:55 PM
"What we have here is a failure to communicate"
Cool Hand Luke

"They said you was hung."

"And they was right."
Blazing Saddles

"Game Over Man."
Aliens

Ardellis
04-16-2007, 05:32 PM
"Trust me." -Raiders of the Lost Ark

"That was your plan? 'Get her'?" -Ghost Busters

"I do not think this word means what you think it means." -The Princess Bride

"Don't touch it! It's Evil!" -Time Bandits

"But... why's the rum gone?" -Pirates of the Caribbean, Curse of the Black Pearl

"No matter where you go, there you are." -Buckaroo Banzai

"Death awaits you all, with nasty big pointy teeth!" -Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"One thing I could never stand about living in Santa Carla. All the damned vampires." -Lost Boys

"You always were an asshole, Gorman." -Aliens

"You look fit. War agrees with you. I keep informed; I follow all your slaughters from a distance." -The Lion in Winter

Jersey Chick
04-16-2007, 06:00 PM
"Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who..."

"On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. 'Tis a silly place."

Monty Python and the Holy Grail

TrainofThought
04-16-2007, 06:35 PM
A few:

“So, if there's anything I can do for you, or, more to the point, to you, you just let me know.”
“Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis?”
“ Not right now.”
“A girl's gotta have her standards.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------
“Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------
“There'll be no locks or bolts between us, Mary Kate... except those in your own mercenary little heart!”

Writing Jedi
04-16-2007, 09:36 PM
Luke Skywalker: "I'll never turn to the dark side. I am a Jedi, like my father before me."
(always makes me want to stand up and cheer.)

Cyclops: "How do we know it's really you?"
Wolverine: "You're a dick."
Cyclops: "Okay."
(always makes me laugh)

Novelust
04-16-2007, 10:44 PM
"Be excellent to each other."

"Party on, dude."

RumpleTumbler
04-16-2007, 10:52 PM
Never, never, interrupt me, okay? Not if there's a fire, not even if you hear the sound of a thud from my home and one week later there's a smell coming from there that can only be a decaying human body and you have to hold a hanky to your face because the stench is so thick that you think you're going to faint. Even then, don't come knocking. Or, if it's election night, and you're excited and you wanna celebrate because some fudgepacker that you date has been elected the first queer president of the United States and he's going to have you down to Camp David, and you want someone to share the moment with. Even then, don't knock. Not on this door. Not for ANY reason. Do you get me, sweetheart?

Lady Esther
04-17-2007, 12:42 AM
"There's a will for this child, greater than my fear of what they may do." (The Nativity Story)

Claudia Gray
04-17-2007, 01:15 AM
It took more than one man to change my name to Shanghai Lily.

Novelust
04-17-2007, 01:24 AM
"You can't dust for vomit."


"It's like, how much more black could this be? And the answer is: ...None. None more black."

billythrilly7th
04-17-2007, 01:50 AM
"I'll have a bloody mary, a steak sandwich and....a steak sandwich."
Irwin Fletcher
aka Fletch

alaskamatt17
04-17-2007, 01:58 AM
"Think they'll have that on the tour?" --Jurassic Park

"I don't kill children."
"I do ... if I have to." --Serenity

"You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you."
"You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die." --The Princess Bride

"You want a war? I will give you a war. I was born for it!" --The Postman (yeah, I know, cheesy. But that line is cool)

"Where is the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? They have passed like rain on the mountain, like wind in the meadow. The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow. How did it come to this?" --The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

"After careful consideration Mr. Hammond, I've decided not to endorse your park."
"So have I." -- Jurassic Park

MattW
04-17-2007, 02:13 AM
"No, we're not homosexuals. But we are willing to learn."

billythrilly7th
04-17-2007, 06:10 AM
"Will they send us somewhere special?"

swvaughn
04-17-2007, 06:17 AM
Ladies and gentlemen, in order to achieve an "R" rating today, a motion picture must contain full frontal nudity, graphic violence, or an explicit reference to the sex act. Since this film has none of those, and since research has proven that R-rated films are by far the most popular with the moviegoing public, the producers of this motion picture have asked me to take this opportunity to say... fuck you.

swvaughn
04-17-2007, 06:29 AM
Oh! Just thought of another one. I could do this all night (but I won't...)

Oh, Johnny, I apologize. I forgot you were there. You may go now.

And the same character, same movie:

Why, Ike, whatever do you mean? Maybe poker's just not your game. I know! Let's have a spelling contest.

benbradley
04-17-2007, 07:09 AM
Both of these movies have already been quoted, they're definitely classics (and I haven't seen many of the others mentioned, I'm so depraved deprived)

KEEPER: Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me
these questions three, 'ere the other side he see.
LAUNCELOT: Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
KEEPER: What is your name?
LAUNCELOT: My name is Sir Launcelot of Camelot.
KEEPER: What is your quest?
LAUNCELOT: To seek the Holy Grail.
KEEPER: What is your favorite color?
LAUNCELOT: Blue.
KEEPER: Right. Off you go.
LAUNCELOT: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
ROBIN: That's easy!
KEEPER: Stop! Who approaches the Bridge of Death must answer me
these questions three, 'ere the other side he see.
ROBIN: Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
KEEPER: What is your name?
ROBIN: Sir Robin of Camelot.
KEEPER: What is your quest?
ROBIN: To seek the Holy Grail.
KEEPER: What is the capital of Assyria?
ROBIN: I don't know that! Auuuuuuuugh!
KEEPER: Stop! What is your name?
GALAHAD: Sir Galahad of Camelot.
KEEPER: What is your quest?
GALAHAD: I seek the Holy Grail.
KEEPER: What is your favorite color?
GALAHAD: Blue. No yel-- Auuuuuuuugh!
KEEPER: Heh heh. Stop! What is your name?
ARTHUR: It is Arthur, King of the Britons.
KEEPER: What is your quest?
ARTHUR: To seek the Holy Grail.
KEEPER: What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
ARTHUR: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?
KEEPER: What? I don't know that! Auuuuuuuugh!
BEDEMIR: How do know so much about swallows?
ARTHUR: Well, you have to know these things when you're a king you know.

And Imus, was he really so bad? I think he was just behind his time...

Jivemn2 : Mnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Attndnt : Can I get you something?
Jivemn2 : S'mo fo butter layin' to the bone. Jackin' me up.
Tightly.
Attndnt : I'm sorry I don't understand.
Jivemn1 : Cutty say he cant hang.
Woman4 : Oh stewardess, I speak jive.
...
Okay, only three more scenes, I promise:
...
Elaine : You got a telegram from headquarters today.
Striker: HEADQUARTERS?!? What is it?
Elaine : Well, its a big building where generals meet. But
that's not important right now. They've cleared
you of any blame for what happened in that raid.
Isn't that good news?
...
You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon
as possible, we've got to get them to the hospital. . .
Elaine : A hospital . . what is it?
Rumack : Its a big building with patients, but that's not
important right now. Tell the captain I must speak
to him.
...
Attndnt : Excuse me sir, there's been a little problem in the
cockpit . . .
Striker : The cockpit . . . what is it?
Attndnt : Its the little room in the front of the plane where the
pilots sit, but that's not important now. You see the
first officer is ill and the Captain need someone to
help him with the radio. Do you know anything about
planes?

Aww, why quote these things when you can read the whole thing:
http://www.sacred-texts.com/neu/mphg/mphg.htm
http://www.awesomefilm.com/script/airplane.txt

Inky
04-17-2007, 07:54 AM
Main characters standing around, watching town snob dance & wiggle her butt, to which they reply:
"Why, that just looks like two pigs fighting under a blanket!"
from the movie: Steel Magnolias

"Luke, I am your father." Need I really say it?

"How can I love you if you don't lie down?" Don't recall the movie, just the line. I brain fart often.

martand
04-17-2007, 08:28 AM
Jack Sparrow: [after Will draws his sword] Put it away, son. It's not worth you getting beat again.
Will Turner: You didn't beat me. You ignored the rules of engagement. In a fair fight, I'd kill you.
Jack Sparrow: That's not much incentive for me to fight fair, then, is it?

martand
04-17-2007, 08:32 AM
When you marooned me on that god forsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate: I'm Captain Jack Sparrow

seun
04-17-2007, 12:40 PM
Three from Chasing Amy

1. "Your mother's a tracer."

2. "What's a Nubian?"
"Shut the f*ck up!"

3. "F*ck Lando Calrissian!"

Inky
04-17-2007, 12:49 PM
Will Turner: "You cheated!"
Captain Jack Sparrow: "Pirate."

seun
04-17-2007, 01:26 PM
"Surely you can't be serious."
"I am serious...and don't call me Shirley."

Inky
04-17-2007, 01:42 PM
"Surely you can't be serious."
"I am serious...and don't call me Shirley."
Okay, so snapped over to give you rep points & mi' fingers got a wee bit excited--don't take that outa context--and hit enter...er...this is going from bad to worse the way it sounds...before I could post what I was giving you rep points for. Forgot about the '...and don't call me Shirley'..that's right, that's right...THAT was a great line!!!
karey

seun
04-17-2007, 01:54 PM
"It's an entirely different kind of flying...all together."

MattW
04-17-2007, 03:28 PM
"Do you like movies about gladiators?"

tomvolz
04-17-2007, 04:16 PM
Vodka martini.
Shaken or stirred?
Does it look like I give a damn?
CASINO ROYALE

I can tell you the license plate numbers of all six cars outside. I can tell you that our waitress is left-handed and the guy sitting up at the counter weighs two-hundred-and-fifteen pounds and knows how to handle himself. I know the best place to look for a gun is the cab of the grey truck outside, and at this altitude, I can run flat out for a half-mile before my hands start to shake. Now why would I know that? How can I know that and not know who I am?
THE BOURNE IDENTITY

On this ship you will refer to me as idiot, not you captain!
SPACEBALLS

We had chemistry together and I tried to light a fart with the Bunson burner and I ended up singeing my balls. Still can't grow hair on my left nut.
SAVING SILVERMAN

You're a thief and a liar.
I only lied about being a thief. I don't do that anymore.
Steal?
Lie.
OCEAN'S ELEVEN

How ironic.
I know. I don't even gamble.
No. A mobster with a gay son. That's ironic.
LUCKY NUMBER SLEVIN

You don not wish to die like dogs?
If there's any way of avoiding that part.
THREE AMIGOS

Stopacoupleofangelsfromenteringandthusnegatingalle xistence.
Excuse me?
Stop a couple of angels from entering and thus negating all existence. I hate when people need it spelled out for them.
DOGMA

Evaine
04-17-2007, 04:23 PM
When I leave the house to take the dog for a walk, I normally murmur "Onwards, onwards, swords against the foe," which is from a very old film which I think starred Ronald Coleman as a poet who roused the beggars of Paris to fight the Duke of Burgundy. It's a musical, (If I were King is the title, I think) and there's also a wonderful line in one of the songs:
"Come all you beggars of Paris town, you lousy rabble of low degree,"
(Chorus) "We rabble of low degree!"

clockwork
04-17-2007, 04:29 PM
Two of my favourites from guess which movie...


LAUREEN

The Ecumenicals are an undisciplined

ultra-left gang, and the leader is

an eccentric to say the least. He

calls himself the Great Ahmed Khan

and wears a hussar's shako.


And:

The scene - a contractural meeting about the rights and royalties of a television show taking place in a ghetto crackhouse between a group of armed political terrorists led by the Great Ahmed Khan and the producers and lawyers of a television network.


MIGGS

(whisking through her

copy of the contract)

Have we settled that sub-licensing

thing? We want a clear definition

here. Gross proceeds should consist

of all funds the sublicensee receives

not merely the net amount remitted

after payment to sublicensee or

distributor.



STEIN

We're not sitting still for over-

head charges as a cost prior to

distribution.



LAUREEN

(whose nerves have

worn thin, explodes)

Don't fuck with my distribution

costs! I'm getting a lousy two-

fifteen per segment, and I 'm already

deficiting twenty-five grand a week

with Metro. I'm paying William

Morris ten percent off the top!

(indicates the

GREAT KHAN)

-- And I'm giving this turkey ten

thou a segment and another five for

this fruitcake --

(meaning MARY ANN GIFFORD)

And, Helen, don't start no shit

with me about a piece again!

I'm paying Metro twenty percent of

all foreign and Canadian distribution,

and that's after recoupment! The

Communist Party's not going to see

a nickel out of this goddam show

until we go into syndication!



MIGGS

Come on, Laureen, you've got the

party in there for seventy-five

hundred a week production expenses.



LAUREEN

I'm not giving this pseudo in-

surrectionary sectarian a piece

of my show! I'm not giving him

script approval! And I sure as

shit ain't cutting him in on my

distribution charges I--



MARY ANN GIFFORD

(screaming in from

the back)

Fuggin fascist! Have you seen the

movies we took at the San Marino

jail break-out demonstrating the

rising up of a seminal prisoner-

class infrastructure!



LAUREEN

You can blow the seminal prisoner-

class infrastructure out your ass!

I'm not knocking down my goddam

distribution charges!



The GREAT KHAN decides to offer an opinion by SHOOTING

his PISTOL off into the air. This gives everybody

something to consider, especially WILLIE STEIN who

almost has a heart attack.



THE GREAT KHAN

Man, give her the FUCKING over-

head clause!


And that's the end of that discussion.


THE GREAT KHAN

(flipping through

his copy)

Let's get to page twenty-two,

five, small a. Subsidiary rights.

------------

OK, so less of a quote, more of a script excerpt but still so damn funny.

Novelust
04-17-2007, 08:35 PM
"You two are from the Poliakoff Agency?"
"Yes, we're the new girls."
"Brand new."

"My name is Josephine."
"And I'm Daphne!"

"Have I got things to tell you."
"What happened?"
"I'm engaged."
"Congratulations. Who's the lucky girl?"
"I am."

"Look, Osgood. I'm going to level with you. We can't get married at all."
"Why not?"
"Well, to begin with, I'm not a natural blonde."
"It doesn't matter."
"And I smoke. I smoke all the time."
"I don't care."
"And I have a terrible past. For three years now, I've been living with a saxophone player."
"I forgive you."
"And I can never have children."
"We'll adopt some."
"But you don't understand! ...I'm a man!"
*shrug* "Well, nobody's perfect."

Stew21
04-17-2007, 09:14 PM
"Charlie don't surf."

Melanie Nilles
04-17-2007, 10:04 PM
"Evil will always win because good is stupid."

"We came. We saw. We kicked it's a**!"

"I don't eat junk food."

The_Grand_Duchess
04-17-2007, 10:30 PM
"Jack Sparrow? You're the worst pirate I've ever heard of!"
"Ah, but you have heard of me."

ChaosTitan
04-18-2007, 01:52 AM
"Are you in?"
"In?"
"Are you there?"
"Where?"
"All right, you're out. I'll call again." --Noises Off

blacbird
04-18-2007, 02:05 AM
"Charlie don't surf."


Yes, yes, yes. I forgot that one. Which brings up the following, from the long director's cut version of Apocalypse Now, not present in the original editing:

"Lance. I want my board. It was a good board, and I liked it."

caw

MattW
04-18-2007, 02:52 AM
"I'm so hungry I could eat the ass end out of a dead rhino."

TrainofThought
04-18-2007, 04:20 AM
“I'm not crazy, I've just been a very bad mood for the last 40 years!”

“You could park a car in the shadow of his ass.”

“I know it's crazy, but I just feel like I got a knack for this shit.”

************************************************** *****

“Please! I have a wife and kids.”
”Oh really, well, you're lucky. You be sweet to them, especially your wife. My husband wasn't sweet to me. Look how I turned out.”

RumpleTumbler
04-18-2007, 04:24 AM
“I'm not crazy, I've just been a very bad mood for the last 40 years!

My favorite movie.

It's actually “I'm not crazy M'Lynn I've just been a very bad mood for the last 40 years!"

McDuff
04-18-2007, 04:57 AM
"I love... lamp?"

TrainofThought
04-18-2007, 05:23 AM
My favorite movie.

It's actually “I'm not crazy M'Lynn I've just been a very bad mood for the last 40 years!"You really do know your movies. I couldn't think of how to spell M'Lynn so I left it out. :D

RumpleTumbler
04-18-2007, 05:25 AM
You really do know your movies. I couldn't think of how to spell M'Lynn so I left it out. :D

What a girl! I've seen you without your baseball uniform on as well. OMG!

TrainofThought
04-18-2007, 05:29 AM
What a girl! I've seen you without your baseball uniform on as well. OMG!Stop, you're making me blush.

newmod
04-18-2007, 05:42 AM
Not a quote, rather an invented quote, but for ages I thought Clint Eastwood in Unforgiven had said when he enters the bar to avenge Morgan Freeman´s death "Which one of you sons of bi@$&es owns this sh!$hole?".

In fact the line was something like "Who´s the fella owns this place?"

I still think mine has a certain poetry to it though.

Inkdaub
04-18-2007, 09:50 AM
Yeah but right after that he does say one ofthe best lines in the movie. After he shoots the fella that owns the place and Little Bill yells that he just shot an unarmed man...

"Well he shoulda armed himself if he's gonna decorate his place with my friend."

Bmwhtly
04-18-2007, 11:36 AM
In fact the line was something like "Who´s the fella owns this place?"I thought it was "Who's the fellas owns this $hithole?"

Well, I'm gonna have to watch it tonight now.

newmod
04-18-2007, 01:25 PM
I thought it was "Who's the fellas owns this $hithole?"

Well, I'm gonna have to watch it tonight now.

Actually now you say that Bmwhtly I think you´re right. Damn, I can only take credit for the progeny of prostitutes bit.

Oh well ...

Spiny Norman
04-18-2007, 05:55 PM
I thought it was "Who's the fellas owns this $hithole?"

Well, I'm gonna have to watch it tonight now.

I actually came here to post this exchange.

Little Bill: This isn't right. I don't deserve this... I was building a house....
William Munny: Deserve's got nothin' to do with it.
Little Bill: (looks at him silently for a long time) I'll see you in hell, William Munny.
William Munny: (pause) Yeah.

Inkdaub
04-19-2007, 10:16 AM
It is in Heist that DeVito says...

"Everyone loves money. That's why they call it money."

Inky
04-19-2007, 12:37 PM
"No self respectin' true Southanah would evah make instant grits!"

Bmwhtly
04-19-2007, 12:55 PM
Well, I'm gonna have to watch it tonight now.I watched it, so I can now add:

Beauchamp: Don't Shoot! I'm unarmed.
Munny: Pick up that rifle.


Hehehehe, like that.

Mud Dauber
04-19-2007, 04:18 PM
"I cheese sandwich you." :D (Love and Sex)

C.bronco
04-19-2007, 04:49 PM
I watched it, so I can now add:

Beauchamp: Don't Shoot! I'm unarmed.
Munny: Pick up that rifle.


Hehehehe, like that.
"Slim? Slim? Can you give me a drink of water, Slim?"
...
or
"Killin a man is a hell of a thing. You take away all he's got, and all he's ever gonna have."
"Well that ain't me no more, Will."
or
"You two try to separate those pigs and if you run into any problems ride over to Sally Two-Trees. Remember that your dear departed mother is watching over you."
I probably didn't get them all right, but that is one heck of a movie!

Bmwhtly
04-19-2007, 05:14 PM
"Slim? Slim? Can you give me a drink of water, Slim?"
...
or
"Killin a man is a hell of a thing. You take away all he's got, and all he's ever gonna have."
"Well that ain't me no more, Will."
or
"You two try to separate those pigs and if you run into any problems ride over to Sally Two-Trees. Remember that your dear departed mother is watching over you."
I probably didn't get them all right, but that is one heck of a movie!
Kid: "You ain't gonna shoot him yourself are ya?"
Will: "You can shoot him"

JerseyGirl1962
04-19-2007, 07:03 PM
From the original Producers movie -

"My blanket! My blue blanket! Give me my blue blanket!" (Bloom)

"That's our Hitler!" (Bialystock)

"Get car." ::laughs:: "Get car." (the blonde)

From It's a Wonderful Life -

"Get me. I'm givin' out wings." (Nick the bartender, endlessly ringing the cash register)

"Ah, youth is wasted on the wrong people." (Man on porch)

That's it. Out you two pixies go - through the door, or out the window. (Nick the bartender)

::talking about George getting married::
Ma Bailey: "First Harry, now George. Annie, we're just two old maids now."
Annie: "Speak for yourself, Miss B."


From LOTR: Fellowship of the Ring -

Pippin: "Anyway, you need people of intelligence on this mission...quest...thing."
Merry: "That rules you out, Pip."

"Roaring fires, malt beer, red meat off the bone." (Gimli, explaining the hospitality of the dwarves in Moria)

::in Moria, waiting for Gandalf to decide which tunnel to take::
Frodo: "I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened."
Gandalf: "So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."


~Nancy

cletus
04-19-2007, 07:40 PM
"Warriors, come out to play-i-ay." - The Warriors


"You see what you get, Warriors? You see what you get when you mess with the Orphans?" - The Warriors


"Got my Cheez Whiz, boy?" - The Blues Brothers

newmod
04-19-2007, 09:00 PM
To keep the Unforgiven lines comin´:

I guess he had it comin´.

We all got it comin´kid.

Writing Jedi
04-19-2007, 09:30 PM
"Warriors, come out to play-i-ay." - The Warriors


"You see what you get, Warriors? You see what you get when you mess with the Orphans?" - The Warriors




Great Holy Crap! That is one of my favourite movies. Of course, most of my favourite quotes are from the character "Ajax" so it would not be appropriate to quote him much. LOL.

You rock, Cletus.

III
04-19-2007, 09:45 PM
"Pretty bird. Pretty bird. Yeah, can you say pretty bird?"
- Billy, the blind kid from 4C while petting a bird with its head taped on.
- Dumb & Dumber

"That's what I love about these highschool girls - I keep getting older, they stay the same age"
- Wooderson in Dazed and Confused

"Why is there a watermellon there?"
- Jeff Goldbum in Buckaroo Banzai

jodiodi
04-19-2007, 11:57 PM
"You killed him!"

"No, I shot him. The bullets and the fall killed him."

Jamie Fox and Tom Cruise: Collateral

Don't know if that's been posted (I haven't read every post in the forum), but those words sum up my credo.

zahra
04-20-2007, 12:38 AM
Love the line in The Taking of Pelham 123, when the policeman radios in to his boss that the station manager's just been shot.

He says something like, "They've just shot him five or six times."
Boss: "Is he dead?"
Pause.
Cop: "Wouldn't you be, Sir?"
I think it's the way that the cop looks at his radio in disbelief before he delivers the line that cracks me up.
But got to say, the lines quoted from Serenity have made it a definite must-see for me.

III
04-20-2007, 04:55 AM
I almost forgot:

"You smell like Tia's dad."

-Hillary Faye from Saved

miztori
04-20-2007, 06:25 AM
" My Name is Roger, I am A Shrubber."
" Your Mother is a hamster & your father smells of elderberries"
Monty Python & the Holy Grail, for which I could go on forever!

"Eg, Ie, Fuck You"- Get Shorty.

"I'm a Steak ohh, Pick me!"
"Maurice, you did not raise your hand therefore your heinous comments will be stricken from the record."
"Cute & cuddly boys,cute & cuddly"-Madagascar

I'm drawing blanks right now, I'm at work & my brain has turned into a fluorescing pile of goo-

WriterInChains
04-20-2007, 07:41 AM
"You're not your fucking khakis."


"I'm not leaving you like this. They eat roadkill around here."


A: It's a nice day.
B: It's always a nice day if it doesn't rain.
A: If the sun's not too warm.

Evaine
04-20-2007, 07:24 PM
A few from the Carry On films, to balance out all the ones about violent death above:
From Carry On Cleo - "Infamy, infamy - they've all got it in for me!"
From Carry On Up the Khyber - a slave bangs a large gong (the old symbol for Rank Films), and Kenneth Williams says "Rank stupidity"
Also Carry On up the Khyber "They're all mad, you know."

Stew21
04-20-2007, 07:28 PM
Ace: You gonna shoot all of us, LaChance?
GOrdy: No Ace. Just you.

The_Grand_Duchess
04-20-2007, 07:30 PM
I haven't seen this movie in a long time so forgive me if I'm off a little but from Willow:

"You are drunk and when you are drunk you forget that I am in charge!" - One of those little Brownie dudes.

Willow: What are you doing?
Madmartigan: I found some blackroot. She loves it.
Willow: Blackroot? I'm the father of two children, and you never, ever give a baby blackroot.
Madmartigan: Well my mother raised us on it. It's good for you! It put's hair on your chest, right Sticks?
Willow: Her name is not Sticks! She's Elora Dannen, the future empress of Tir Asleen and the last thing she's gonna want is a hairy chest!


I always though there would be a sequel to that movie but alas there never was. :(

Bmwhtly
04-20-2007, 07:32 PM
"Eg, Ie, Fuck You"- Get Shorty.
That reminds me of a line from The Departed:

"Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe Fuck yourself."

Mark Wahlberg really is good.

III
04-20-2007, 08:14 PM
That reminds me of a line from The Departed:

"Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe Fuck yourself."

Mark Wahlberg really is good.

"I'm the guy who does his job. You must be the other guy."

I use that one all the time at work.

Inkdaub
04-25-2007, 11:51 AM
My favorite Departed lines are the 'You must be the other guy' already mentioned and the "You don't have any cats" exchange. Good stuff.

My favorite line(s) from Get Shorty is actually Leonard's as it's in the book...

Chili - How'd you get in here?
Ray Bones - It was easy. I told them I was you. I acted real stupid and they believed me.

akiwiguy
04-25-2007, 02:28 PM
Quite a few from Pulp Fiction.

The Wolf: Just because you are a character doesn't mean that you have character.
------------
Mia: That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the f*** up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence.
------------
Marsellus: You see, this profession is filled to the brim with unrealistic motherf****rs. Motherf****rs who thought their ass would age like wine. If you mean it turns to vinegar, it does. If you mean it gets better with age, it don't.
------------
The Wolf (about to drive over town to sort out a problem): That's thirty minutes away. I'll be there in ten.

David Erlewine
04-25-2007, 03:20 PM
[quote=McDuff;1268011]
As to my favourites, well:

"Shut the fuck up Donny, you're out of your element!"

"I'd like to wish you both good luck, we're all counting on you."

"Say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism, at least it's an ethos."

"Excuse me, Stewardess? I speak Jive."

"Obviously you're not a golfer."

Aaaah, Lebowski. Nicely said. Still my favorite ever. The golfer line is tops. Other classics from it:
"Also, Dude, chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian-American, please."
"Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with nail polish."
"Shut the f*ck up, Donny! V.I. Lenin. Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov!"

tomvolz
04-26-2007, 03:20 AM
Speak English, f*ckst!ck?
SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION

What are you gonna say?
I'm gonna tell him what the guy with two penises told his tailor when he asked if he dresses to the right or to the left...yes.
LUCKY NUMBER SLEVIN

Hahaha...ooh, my back.
THE INCREDIBLES

First things first. Where's your sh!tter? I got a crap on deck that could choke a donkey.
AUSTIN POWERS (II)

Look at her! She looks like a slut. Could you love her?
Nah...maybe five, ten minutes tops.
FLETCH

Joe270
04-26-2007, 06:16 AM
"You're Late."
"I'm the president . . ." Christopher Walken shoots him dead.
-Dogs of War

"Me and the boys got some work to do. It ain't like it used to be, but it'll do." Edmund O'Brien.
-The Wild Bunch

"Hey, what about me?"
"So what about you?"
-Warriors

"This is this." Robert De Nero.
-Deer Hunter

"Where dja get the coconuts?"

"Hey, you fucked up, you trusted us."
-Animal House

"Did we give up after the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?"

"Do you feel lucky, punk?"

"Rosebud."

"Sorry, I can't help you, Sundance."

"Swim? Hell, the fall will kill you."

"He was smilin', smilin' that Luke smile."

"I want you to kill all the gophers."

These should be pretty easy for ya'll. I gave a couple hints.

Inkdaub
04-26-2007, 10:13 AM
ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?

Joe270
04-26-2007, 10:32 AM
Damn, Ink, I thought that was a personal attack for a second there.

Ooooh, do it again.(Quote, Lion King.)

VeggieChick
04-26-2007, 06:48 PM
"You know, somehow 'I told you so' just doesn't quite say it."


(fake sneeze)
"Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit."


I, Robot

Sassee
04-26-2007, 07:19 PM
"Invader's blood marches through my veins like radioactive rubber pants. The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!!!"
- Invader Zim

-*-*-*-*-*-

"... and that was the second time I got crabs."
- Super Troopers

-*-*-*-*-*-

"Dom Portwood: Hi, Peter. What's happening? We need to talk about your TPS reports.
Peter Gibbons: Yeah. The coversheet. I know, I know. Uh, Bill talked to me about it.
Dom Portwood: Yeah. Did you get that memo?
Peter Gibbons: Yeah. I got the memo. And I understand the policy. And the problem is just that I forgot the one time. And I've already taken care of it so it's not even really a problem anymore.
Dom Portwood: Ah! Yeah. It's just we're putting new coversheets on all the TPS reports before they go out now. So if you could go ahead and try to remember to do that from now on, that'd be great. All right!"
- Office Space

-*-*-*-*-*-

"Cardinal Roark: Will that bring you satisfaction, my son? Killing a helpless, old, fart?
Marv: Killing? No. No satisfaction. Everything up until the killing, will be a gas."
- Sin City

-*-*-*-*-*-

"Lindsey: I was thinking that if you're still alive when I get back from work tonight... maybe we could go out to dinner or something?"
- Lucky Number Slevin

-*-*-*-*-*-

"The Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Pinky: Uh... yeah, Brain, but where will we get rubber pants our size?"

III
04-26-2007, 10:11 PM
"They are making legal history in there right now, Ray! Legal history!"
- Charlie Babbitt chastizing Rainman for blowing their chance to get into a farm house and watch The People's Court.

Writer2011
04-26-2007, 10:12 PM
"Murdock, i'm coming to get you"-- From RAMBO: FIRST BLOOD PART II :)

One of those cheesy mid 80's action flicks.

Inkdaub
04-27-2007, 12:41 PM
Damn, Ink, I thought that was a personal attack for a second there.

Ooooh, do it again.(Quote, Lion King.)

;)

Toxic_Waste
04-29-2007, 02:16 AM
"It is too late -- my blood runs through your veins." (The Lost Boys)

DeborahM
04-29-2007, 03:45 AM
Here's a few of mine:

You mean I was short and fat? Overboard
She worships the quicksand I walk on. Steel Magnolias
Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine. Casablanca (I had this used on me, only this classy man used it to fit where we met!!!)
Snap out of it! Moonstruck
License plate number…D U H ###, well duh! Trapped in Paradise
Just like a wop, bringing a knife to a gun fight. I don’t remember the movie, but it went something like that.
As you wish. The Princess Bride
You can’t handle the truth! A Few Good Men
He really can’t think without that thing. A Few Good Men
Why does everybody ask if I’m drinking? Do I have a coaster stuck to my butt? Hope Floats
Try more chewing gum, sweetie. Birdcage
The cream rises to the top. Feds
We’re FUBAR.
Fubar? What’s fubar?
F**ked Up Beyond All Recognition. Tango & Cash

scarletpeaches
04-29-2007, 03:46 AM
"I'm too old for this shit."

Joe270
04-29-2007, 04:37 AM
"Hey, Old Guys." Wil Smith, MIB.

Serenity
04-29-2007, 06:12 AM
"Now that's some heavy duty dog doo." - Carl Weathers as Sgt. Weaver, Force 10 from Navarone

Joe270
04-29-2007, 11:51 AM
"Night Rider!" Mad Max.

akiwiguy
04-29-2007, 12:46 PM
Hannibal Lecter: You know what you look like to me, with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well scrubbed, hustling rube with a little taste. Good nutrition's given you some length of bone, but you're not more than one generation from poor white trash, are you, Agent Starling? And that accent you've tried so desperately to shed: pure West Virginia. What is your father, dear? Is he a coal miner? Does he stink of the lamp? You know how quickly the boys found you... all those tedious sticky fumblings in the back seats of cars... while you could only dream of getting out... getting anywhere... getting all the way to the FBI.

Lady Esther
05-02-2007, 06:43 AM
"No, I will not burn in hell. You will burn in hell; for I am king! Ordained by God!" (The Man in the Iron Mask)

Jongfan
05-02-2007, 07:04 AM
Heartbreak Ridge :
Col. Meyers: What's your assessment of this situation, Gunny?
Highway: It's a cluster fuck, sir. Marines shouldn't be sitting on their sorry asses filling out requisitions for equipment they should already have.
Col. Meyers: An astute observation.


Highway: Why don't I bend you over the table there... send you home with the "I just pumped the neighbor's cat" look on your face.

Inkdaub
05-02-2007, 02:06 PM
"No, I will not burn in hell. You will burn in hell; for I am king! Ordained by God!" (The Man in the Iron Mask)

This is my favorite line from this movie. I also like...

"Dartagnan, let us play a game. Let us pretend that I am king and you are the captain of my Musketeers." - Louis(DiCaprio)

I suspect we might be the only people who like this movie, though.

ChaosTitan
05-02-2007, 06:51 PM
This is my favorite line from this movie. I also like...

"Dartagnan, let us play a game. Let us pretend that I am king and you are the captain of my Musketeers." - Louis(DiCaprio)

I suspect we might be the only people who like this movie, though.

How can you not like a movie with Jeremy Irons, John Malkovitch, Gabriel Byrne, and a tiny role by Hugh Laurie? :LilLove:


"Why is Porthos walking into the barn naked?"
"About to hang himself, I suppose. He's been threatening to do it for months."

Jongfan
05-02-2007, 07:42 PM
My favorite Dudley Moore character Arthur

Susan: A real woman could stop you from drinking.
Arthur: It'd have to be a real BIG woman

The_Grand_Duchess
05-02-2007, 08:03 PM
This is my favorite line from this movie. I also like...

"Dartagnan, let us play a game. Let us pretend that I am king and you are the captain of my Musketeers." - Louis(DiCaprio)

I suspect we might be the only people who like this movie, though.

Not true! I love that movie. I mean what was there not to love? Who was Hugh Laurie in that movie?

chartreuse
05-02-2007, 11:43 PM
From Tombstone, when one of the Cowboys says to Doc Holliday (Val Kilmer) - "you're so drunk, you're probably seeing double."

To which Doc replies: "Yeah, but I got two guns, one for each of ya."

Inkdaub
05-03-2007, 11:24 AM
I love practically every spoken word in Tombstone including the above. Incidentally, the Cowboy in that quote(the same one who gave Doc shit for not playing Stephen Stinking Foster instead of Frederick Fucking Chopin) is Lowell from Wings...the guy from Sideways...the Sandman from Spiderman...the guy whose name I can't remember and won't look up on IMDB because....

...I am struggling not to look up Iron Mask and see who Laurie was but I want to remember it myself...to be continued...

Bmwhtly
05-03-2007, 02:25 PM
I love practically every spoken word in Tombstone including the above. Incidentally, the Cowboy in that quote(the same one who gave Doc shit for not playing Stephen Stinking Foster instead of Frederick Fucking Chopin) is Lowell from Wings...the guy from Sideways...the Sandman from Spiderman...the guy whose name I can't rememberAnd the Corporal from Aliens.
Michael Biehn. Or however you spell his last name. And the character's name was Johnny Ringo.

Bmwhtly
05-03-2007, 02:33 PM
Just like a wop, bringing a knife to a gun fight. I don’t remember the movie, but it went something like that.Sean Connery in The Untouchables.
Which, incidentally, also gave us
"You're nothing but a lot of talk and a badge!"

Bmwhtly
05-03-2007, 03:20 PM
From Four Brothers

*They drop a guy out of a window*
Angel: You think he's dead?
Bobby: He's not dead, he's just f*cked up. Lets go talk to him now.

or

Angel: Put the Cuckoo back in the Clock Baby!

Serenity
05-03-2007, 03:41 PM
I love practically every spoken word in Tombstone including the above. Incidentally, the Cowboy in that quote(the same one who gave Doc shit for not playing Stephen Stinking Foster instead of Frederick Fucking Chopin) is Lowell from Wings...the guy from Sideways...the Sandman from Spiderman...the guy whose name I can't remember and won't look up on IMDB because....

...I am struggling not to look up Iron Mask and see who Laurie was but I want to remember it myself...to be continued...


Thomas Haden Church.



And the Corporal from Aliens.
Michael Biehn. Or however you spell his last name. And the character's name was Johnny Ringo.


Michael Biehn was the main bad guy- Thomas Haden Church was one of the Clantons.

Bmwhtly
05-03-2007, 05:59 PM
Thomas Haden Church.

Michael Biehn was the main bad guy- Thomas Haden Church was one of the Clantons.You're absolutely right.
That's what I get for showing off :D

Although, I would have said that Powers Boothe was the Main bad guy. But it could be argued both ways.

C.bronco
05-03-2007, 06:07 PM
"You're the cocker's daughter?!"
and
"Those who are tardy do not get fruit cup."

also
"Excuse me. It was the TV. I've turned it down."
High Anxiety

Inkdaub
05-04-2007, 11:27 AM
You're absolutely right.
That's what I get for showing off :D

Although, I would have said that Powers Boothe was the Main bad guy. But it could be argued both ways.

Thomas Haden Church...yes.

I would say Boothe is the main bad guy as he is the Cowboys' leader. He's what you might call...the founder of the feast.

Curly Bill is Wyatt's main nemesis while Ringo is Doc's main nemesis would be about how I see it.

Bmwhtly
05-04-2007, 01:48 PM
"I'll shoot for the Queen and you for, well, whomever." English Bob - Unforgiven.

Serenity
05-04-2007, 04:27 PM
You're absolutely right.
That's what I get for showing off :D

Although, I would have said that Powers Boothe was the Main bad guy. But it could be argued both ways.

True, true enough.

And to get back on track:


"Evidently Mr. Ringo's an educated man. Now I really hate him."

ChaosTitan
05-04-2007, 04:29 PM
...I am struggling not to look up Iron Mask and see who Laurie was but I want to remember it myself...to be continued...

I'll give you a hint...

"Execute him for distributing rotten food."

:D

C.bronco
05-04-2007, 04:32 PM
not a movie but:
"Mmmmm! Floor pie!" -Homer Simpson

III
05-04-2007, 05:18 PM
not a movie but:
"Mmmmm! Floor pie!" -Homer Simpson

Oh please don't start a Simpsons quote thread or I will seriously NEVER get anything done.

Kay_XX
05-06-2007, 05:42 PM
-My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

Gladiator

It may be a bit of a cliché line but it still sends shivers down my spine every single time.

ChaosTitan
05-06-2007, 05:47 PM
It may be a bit of a cliché line but it still sends shivers down my spine every single time.

Especially the way Russell Crowe says it. Yummy.

And since we're on the topic of RC, here's a quote from (the best movie ever) L.A. Confidential:

"Have you a valediction, boyo?"

Kay_XX
05-06-2007, 06:03 PM
Especially the way Russell Crowe says it. Yummy.

And since we're on the topic of RC, here's a quote from (the best movie ever) L.A. Confidential:

"Have you a valediction, boyo?"

It's such a shame he's done some lame movies lately. But damn, he's great in L.A. Confidental too!

-Who in the hell are you?
-The ghost of Christmas past. Why don't you dance with a man for a change?

Anthony Ravenscroft
05-06-2007, 10:59 PM
"Sir, I'd like to spank your bald head & then lick it."

III
05-07-2007, 03:01 AM
"Sir, I'd like to spank your bald head & then lick it."

I told you to stop stalking me!

Anthony Ravenscroft
05-07-2007, 09:48 AM
"Remember what we did to Jello Biafra!"

Writer2011
05-07-2007, 09:51 AM
"What we've got here is a failure to communicate" from Cool Hand Luke :)

Bmwhtly
05-07-2007, 12:11 PM
"Then I lost it. Kinda lost it all; Faith, dignity, about 15 pounds"

nighttimer
05-07-2007, 12:43 PM
Bounty Hunter: I'm lookin' for Josey Wales.
Josey: That'd be me.
Bounty Hunter: You're wanted, Wales.
Josey: Reckon I'm right popular. You a bounty hunter?
Bounty Hunter: A man's gotta do something for a living these days.
Josey: Dyin' ain't much of a livin', boy.
(The Outlaw Josey Wales)

I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk? (Dirty Harry)

Yeah, well, I always heard there were three kinds of suns in Kansas, sunshine, sunflowers, and sons-of-bitches.

(The Outlaw Josey Wales)

Verna
Why can't you admit it?

Tom
Admit what?

Verna
Admit you don't like me seeing Leo because you're
jealous. Admit it isn't all cool calculation
with you--that you've got a heart--even if it's
small and feeble and you can't remember the last
time you used it.

(Miller's Crossing)

Caspar
Listen Leo, I pay off to you every month like a
greengrocer--a lot more than the Motzah--and I'm
sick a gettin' the high hat--

Leo
You pay off for protection, just like everyone
else. Far as I know--and what I don't know in
this town ain't worth knowing--the cops haven't
closed any of your dives and the D.A. hasn't
touched any of your rackets. You haven't bought
any license to kill bookies and today I ain't
selling any. Now take your flunky and dangle.

(Miller's Crossing)

Sully: Here's twenty dollars to get some beers in Val Verde. It'll give us all a little more time with your daughter.
Henriques: Heh.
Matrix: You're a funny man, Sully, I like you. That's why I'm going to kill you last. (Commando)

Matrix: Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last?
Sully: That's right, Matrix. You did.
Matrix: I lied. (DROPS HIM OVER A CLIFF) (Commando)

Cooke: You scared motherfucker? Well you should be because this green beret is going to kick your big ass.
Matrix : I eat green berets for breakfast. And right now I'm very hungry.
Cindy: I can't believe this macho bullshit. (Commando)

:e2stooges

Bmwhtly
05-07-2007, 02:47 PM
"What kind of songbird, Jesus-freak dealers you bring me to?"

"Middletown cop arrested us for suspicion of mischief"
"Why?"
"We were driving with a deployed airbag"

Kiester
05-07-2007, 08:44 PM
OOhhh....me likey this thread :)

'Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie, or are ya gonna bite?'
-Mr. Blonde (Reservoir Dogs)

J: What the F*ck?
(Chris Slams Sun bed Down)
C: You mind your language in front of the boy.
J: Jesus Christ!
(Slams down sun bed again)
C: That includes blasphemy as well!

- John and Big Chris (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels)

'It is no shame to be poor, but then again, it's no big honor either'
Tevier (Fiddler on the Roof)

'You are one, ugly motherf*cker'
Dutch (Predator)

'Ha ha ha! You think this is the real Quaid? IT IS!'
Quaid (Total Recall)

'If the milk tuns out to be sour, I aint the kind of pussy to drink it. D'ya know what I mean?'
Rory Breaker (Lock Stock)

'HELGA! VHERE ARE YOU GOING! ARGENTINA'S ZAT VHAY!'
German Guy -Can't remember his name, sorry- (The Producers)

'Erm....Norway! That's one of mine. I won an award for that!'
(Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy)

'I have just killed a man, and I want to confess!!'
Benedict (Last Action Hero)

There's a lot more, but I can't be arsed to put them all down :P

Bmwhtly
05-08-2007, 05:04 PM
Ray's thread on Hot Fuzz brought a few to mind.

"I couldn't see his face, I'm not made of eyes" - Danny

"You're probably wondering why we call them the Andes"
"They're both called Andrew?"
"And having a conversation with them is an uphill struggle"

"Yaaaaarp"

"He lives up the road with his mother and sister"
"And are they as big as he is?"
"Who?"
"The Mother and Sister."
"Same Person"

"No-one tells me nothin'"

"What about this guy. Why's he got his hat pulled down like that?"
"He's fuck-ugly"
"Or maybe he doesn't want you to see his face"
"'cos he's fuck-ugly"

Ah well, just a month until DVD heaven.

Kiester
05-08-2007, 09:55 PM
Also not forgetting:

"So, why did you become a Policeman?"
"Police Officer"
"So, why did you become a Policeman Officer?"

C.bronco
05-08-2007, 10:03 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fast Eddie Felson: You're some piece of work... You're also a natural character.
Vincent: You see? I been tellin' her that. I got natural character.
Eddie: That's not what I said, kid. I said you are a natural character; you're an incredible flake.
The Color of Money

Bmwhtly
05-09-2007, 11:21 AM
Also not forgetting:

"So, why did you become a Policeman?"
"Police Officer"
"So, why did you become a Policeman Officer?"And, of course:

Danny: "Where's Lurch"
Nicholas: "He's in the freezer"
Danny: "D'you tell him to cool off?"
Nicholas: "No, I didn't say anything."
Danny: "Shame"
Nicholas: "There was a bit you missed earlier, I distracted him with the cuddly monkey. Then I said 'Playtime's over' and hit him with the lily"
Danny: "You're off the fucking chain!"

ChaosTitan
07-18-2007, 07:01 AM
I had to resurrect this one to add a new favorite quote. Watched Dead Silence tonight, a new one from the creators of the Saw franchise. It's definitely more of a thriller than a horror film, but the dull moments are worth it for the twist ending.

Anyway, the favorite quote is from a scene where Jamie (the hero) is fleeing from a cop (Lipton) bent on arresting him. As Jamie flees the house and bolts for his car, Lipton pursues.

Lipton: Don't make me chase after you! (hero flees in car) I don't have a full tank of gas!

maestrowork
07-18-2007, 07:04 AM
"Yipee ki yay, motherf******" - Die Hard

kristin724
07-18-2007, 07:45 AM
Two come to mind, not sure if they've been mentioned yet

"Leave the gun, take the canoli"

and more recently

"This is Spartaaaaaaaa!"

If you don't know where they are from, Lord help you.

kristin724
07-18-2007, 07:48 AM
Oh!

Buckleberry Ferry!

BenPanced
07-18-2007, 07:49 AM
"Old man, you give your dogs any more of my food and I'm gonna kick you until you're dead." - Olympia Dukakis, Moonstruck

"Now you do as Mommy and Daddy tell you or we're going to send you to Catholic school where you belong!" - Deborah Harry, Hairspray

Writer2011
07-18-2007, 09:56 AM
"How'd you get the scar tough guy?" from the BEST movie EVER Scarface

"My name is Tony Montana."--Scarface

"I am not an animal, I am a human being" --The Elephant Man

"I'm not wonder woman you know."--Sky High

"What we've got here is a failure to communicate...now you take what we had here last week.."--Cool Hand Luke

JoNightshade
07-18-2007, 10:20 AM
"I'm your huckleberry." - Doc Holliday, Tombstone

And a new favorite:

"You killed a helicopter with a CAR!" - kid from Live Free or Die Hard

Danger Jane
07-18-2007, 10:34 AM
"I think you're the fucking Antichrist."

Donnie to Cunningham, Donnie Darko

Bmwhtly
07-18-2007, 11:33 AM
"Just because we're firing blanks, it doesn't mean we have to be thinking Nice thoughts.
So, if little red riding hood should show up with a bazooka and a bad attitude, I expect you to chin the bitch"

BenPanced
07-18-2007, 05:02 PM
"Hi, Brad! I've just come to tell you how FABULOUS I am!" - Jessica Harper, Shock Treatment

Duncan J Macdonald
07-18-2007, 09:04 PM
"Yipee ki yay, motherf******" - Die Hard
- Die Hard II
- Die Hard III
- Die Hard IV

Jabs
07-18-2007, 09:13 PM
"Zee Germans..."

jennifer75
07-21-2007, 02:16 AM
Every line from Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgandy

childeroland
07-21-2007, 05:45 AM
From The Usual Suspects:

You think you can catch Keyser Soze? You think a guy like that comes this close to getting caught, and sticks his head out? If he comes up for anything it'll be to get rid of me. After that... my guess is you'll never hear from him again.

Keaton always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him." Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Soze.

Who is Keyser Soze? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And poof. Just like that, he's gone.

Chumplet
07-21-2007, 06:41 AM
"Disco is NOT dead! Disco is LIFE!" -- Mystery Men

"You look like the piss boy."
"Well, you look like a bucket of shit!" -- History of the World Part I

"I'll have what she's having." -- When Harry Met Sally

I'll think of more later.

I got a lot of D's quotes, but not ten. Besides, it's cheatin' if I read all the other responses and just add them up.

Tiger
07-21-2007, 07:35 AM
"Oh? So, you hired a dick to find an asshole"

Mickey Rourke "Barfly"

Ardellis
07-21-2007, 06:09 PM
From George Lucas's little-known animated film, Twice Upon a Time:

Rod Rescueman, inexperienced superhero, who has just rescued Flora Fauna, damsel in distress: "Kiss me. It's the rules."

MelodyO
07-21-2007, 07:12 PM
Dodge this. The Matrix

Varthikes
07-22-2007, 12:50 AM
"I merely chew in self-defense, but I never swallow."
--Draco, DragonHeart

O'Neil: "If anyone has anything to say, now's the time to say it."
[Jackson sneezes]
-- Stargate

"Ever since I was kidnapped by aliens ten years ago, I've been dyin' for some payback. So, just want you to know I won't let you down."
-- Russell Case; Independence Day

Chumplet
07-22-2007, 01:47 AM
"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die." Roy Batty, Blade Runner

auntybug
07-23-2007, 05:04 PM
"Would you like to kiss me on the veranda?"
"Lips would be fine."

Three Amigos

rosebud1981
07-23-2007, 07:12 PM
Could I interest you in a nightcap?

No, thank you. I don't wear them.

- The Naked Gun

Tiger
07-23-2007, 10:08 PM
From George Lucas's little-known animated film, Twice Upon a Time:

Rod Rescueman, inexperienced superhero, who has just rescued Flora Fauna, damsel in distress: "Kiss me. It's the rules."

Thought it was a kid's movie--until the fairy thing called that guy a schmuck.

Varthikes
08-09-2007, 08:14 AM
"Don't let the bedbugs bite, or crawl into your ear and lay eggs in your brain."
-- Grandma; The Ant Bully

A.M. Wildman
08-09-2007, 08:49 AM
"If you say three, mister, you'll never hear the man count ten."

"I know, I know, I'm gonna use good judgement. I haven't lost my temper in 40 years. But pilgrim you caused a lot of trouble this morning. Mighta got somebody killed. And somebody oughta belt you in the mouth, but I won't, I won't. The Hell I won't!"

"It's a hundred and six miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses. Hit it."

"You're a dinosaur Callahan."
"Yeah, and You're a legend in your own mind.

MonaLeigh
08-10-2007, 02:03 AM
"I carried a watermelon."

Dirty Dancing

Jabs
08-14-2007, 08:19 PM
"I know, I know, I'm gonna use good judgement. I haven't lost my temper in 40 years. But pilgrim you caused a lot of trouble this morning. Mighta got somebody killed. And somebody oughta belt you in the mouth, but I won't, I won't. The Hell I won't!"


Excellent choice.

Varthikes
08-15-2007, 02:37 AM
From The Ant Bully:

"We're not some mindless savages. Let us study this Human. Then, we'll eat him."
--Zoc;

"He's soft. His skeleton is on the inside."
"He's inside-out?"
(everyone gasps in astonishment)

Tiger
08-15-2007, 06:54 AM
"Your mouthwash just ain't makin' it"
"You sure we put enough dynamite in there, Butch?"
"Oh! It's Godzilla!"
"Snakes... Why did it have to be snakes?"
"Everybody knows that when you make an assumption, you make an ass outta you... and umption."

imagoodgurl4
08-18-2007, 07:27 AM
"Surely you can't be serious?"
"I am serious. And don't call me Shirley."
~ Airplane

valen_sinclair
09-02-2007, 10:38 PM
Name 10 or more film titles and I'll give ya a rep point...

Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.

I should have guessed. When my men didn't come back I should have guessed. How many of you did they hire?

You eat one lousy foot and they call you a cannibal. What a world!

When the music ends, pick up your gun. Go ahead and shoot me Colonel. Just try.

Look how he glares at me... If he wasn't fathered by the black ram in the full of the moon my name is not Ragnar.

It's an ugly planet. It's a bug planet.

Why, by God, girl, that's a Colt's Dragoon! You're no bigger than a corn nubbin, what're you doing with all this pistol?

To kill a man you shoot him in the heart. Isn't that what you said, Ramon?

This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight... turbulence and then explode.

You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy?

My mother was a pure woman from a noble family. And I, at least, know who my father is, you pig-eating son of a whore!

Bio-readouts are all in the green, looks like she's alive. Well, there goes our salvage, guys.

Your Honor, may I have permission to treat Ms. Vito as a hostile witness?
You think I'm hostile now, wait 'til you see me tonight.

Now, Kiddo, one of the things I always liked about you is you appear wise beyond your years. Then allow me to impart a word to the wise. Whatever - WHAT-EVER - Pai Mei says, obey. If you flash him, even for an instant, a defiant eye, he'll pluck it out. And if you throw any American sass his way, he will snap your back and your neck like they were twigs, and that will be the story of you.

There's a contract out on your life. Believe me. I was hired to kill you, but I'm not going to do it. It's either because I'm in love with your daughter or because I have a newfound respect for life.

Can't quite remember how you got squatter's rights in here, anyhow. Seems to me you came by one night to ask for an extra blanket and stayed a year.

That's no moon. It's a space station.

I walked right to that office -- that's what I did -- and I reached across that desk and I grabbed him by his fat head and I said, "Listen, man! I'm not going to jail for you or for anybody!"

You mean, you'll put down your rock, and I'll put down my sword, and we'll try to kill each other like civilized people?

A silver stake? A crucifix? What, did you think we haven't tried everything before? We've shot him, stabbed him, clubbed him, sprayed him with holy water, staked him through the heart, and STILL he lives! Do you understand? No-one knows how to kill Dracula!

Where did you learn to fight with furniture?
On the playing fields of Eton!

I want Hatcher dead. I want his family dead. And if you can't kill him, I go kill him, and then I'm gonna kill you.

What I offer you is freedom; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical dream; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical law; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical God.

If you do not speak English, I am at your disposal with 187 other languages along with their various dialects and sub-tongues.

Butch and me have been talking it all over. Wherever the hell Bolivia is, that's where we're off to.

I'm so scared my bones are clicking like dice on a Reno crap table. I should be back in Hollywood, sitting at my typewriter.

I'm an angel. I kill newborns while their mamas watch. I turn cities into salt. And occasionally, when I feel like it, I tear little girls apart. And from now till kingdom come... the only thing you can count on... in your existence... is never understanding why.

You've come to Nottingham once too often!
When this is over, my friend, there'll be no need for me to come again!

-Derek


ok here is my guess at some of them....

Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over. THIS IS 2001 A SPACE ODYSSEY

It's an ugly planet. It's a bug planet. STARSHIP TROOPERS

This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight... turbulence and then explode. THIS IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER.....SERENITY

You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy? SERENITY again?

Your Honor, may I have permission to treat Ms. Vito as a hostile witness?
You think I'm hostile now, wait 'til you see me tonight. ANAYLIZE THIS?

That's no moon. It's a space station. TWO POINTS HERE FOR ME.... STAR WARS A NEW HOPE AND TWISTER.

What I offer you is freedom; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical dream; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical law; freedom from Arthur's tyrannical God. ARTHUR???

Bio-readouts are all in the green, looks like she's alive. Well, there goes our salvage, guys. ALIENS

There's a contract out on your life. Believe me. I was hired to kill you, but I'm not going to do it. It's either because I'm in love with your daughter or because I have a newfound respect for life. GROSSE POINT BLANK??

You mean, you'll put down your rock, and I'll put down my sword, and we'll try to kill each other like civilized people? THE PRINCESS'S BRIDE

Butch and me have been talking it all over. Wherever the hell Bolivia is, that's where we're off to. BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID

You've come to Nottingham once too often!
When this is over, my friend, there'll be no need for me to come again! ROBIN HOOD MEN IN TIGHTS

You eat one lousy foot and they call you a cannibal. What a world! CANNIBAL THE MUSICAL

I should have guessed. When my men didn't come back I should have guessed. How many of you did they hire? YOUNG GUNS (not sure if 1 or 2)

JamieFord
09-02-2007, 11:02 PM
"I've spent fourteen years being a whore for the advertising industry. The only way I could save myself now is to start firebombing."--Lester, American Beauty

(As a former ad guy, it sent happy chills up my spine...)

valen_sinclair
09-02-2007, 11:03 PM
"Define Interesting?"
"Oh god, oh god, we're all gonna die!"

Serenity....

BarbJ
09-04-2007, 11:40 PM
"Your Honor, may I have permission to treat Ms. Vito as a hostile witness?
You think I'm hostile now, wait 'til you see me tonight. ANAYLIZE THIS?"

I know that one is from My Cousin Vinny - it made me laugh.

"You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy? SERENITY again?"

Saving Private Ryan? I got The Princess Bride, Butch Cassidy and Aliens - I bought Serenity but haven't been able to watch yet ... and, and, and ...

This is so annoying. I recognize so many but can't say where they're from. I think this is a sinister plot to drive movie watchers absolutely insane.

Mission accomplished. :D

Calla Lily
09-04-2007, 11:46 PM
My guesses:



You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy? SAVING PRIVATE RYAN?


Your Honor, may I have permission to treat Ms. Vito as a hostile witness?
You think I'm hostile now, wait 'til you see me tonight. MY COUSIN VINNY





You've come to Nottingham once too often!
When this is over, my friend, there'll be no need for me to come again! ROBIN HOOD (THE ERROLL FLYNN VERSION)



[/COLOR]

Mr Flibble
05-14-2008, 01:27 AM
So we had the worst...what's the best?

I shall kick off with two of my faves

I'm here to kick ass and chew bubble gum, and I'm alllll out of bubble gum

and

Ready? I was born ready.

DWSTXS
05-14-2008, 01:34 AM
'We own it." - James Caan - Thief

also:

"Who are those guys?" and "I can't swim!" both from Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

Bubastes
05-14-2008, 01:36 AM
My personal favorite (from Say Anything):

"I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that."

Sarpedon
05-14-2008, 01:36 AM
"Remember Louie, this gun is pointed right at your heart."

"That is my least vulnerable spot!"

Hell, half of Claude Raines' lines in Casablanca belong in this thread.

"I am shocked, SHOCKED to see that there is GAMBLING going on in here!"

"Why I am talking to a beautiful woman about another man?"

"Make it 10,000 francs. I'm only a poor corrupt official."

maestrowork
05-14-2008, 01:36 AM
Leia: I love you.
Han: I know.

Sassee
05-14-2008, 01:38 AM
Leia: I love you.
Han: I know.

^^ Win.

Bubastes
05-14-2008, 01:39 AM
Leia: I love you.
Han: I know.

Love that one!

Jcomp
05-14-2008, 01:42 AM
Everything that Val Kilmer says in Tombstone, followed closely by everything that Vince Vaughn says in Swingers.

Fine... I'll give an actual quote on top of this... also from Tombstone. The big homey Wyatt Earp...

"All right Clanton. You called down the thunder well now you've got it. You see that? It says 'United States Marshall.' Take a good look at him Ike, Take a good look at him, Ike... 'cause that's how you're gonna end up. The Cowboys are finished, you understand? I see a red sash, I kill the man wearin' it. So run, you cur. Run! Tell all the other curs the law's comin'! You tell 'em I'm coming! And hell's coming with me, you hear? Hell's coming with me!"

And yes, it's a bit more than a "line", but what the hell...

ColoradoGuy
05-14-2008, 01:43 AM
Loosely paraphrased:

Bad Guy: "That's a knife"
Crock: "That's not a knife (pulling out extremely large pig sticker) . . . that's a knife."

Mr Flibble
05-14-2008, 01:44 AM
Actually I've always been fond of this one.

'Ive seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.


Rutger Hauer played it so well. *sigh*

III
05-14-2008, 01:46 AM
How about some esoteric ones

"They were cones!"
- Wedding Singer

"I'm hungry."
- Top Secret

"What's that watermellon doing there?"
- Buckaroo Banzaii

"Do you like Huey Lewis?"
- American Psycho

maestrowork
05-14-2008, 01:48 AM
From Atonement:

"In my dreams I kiss your c***, your sweet wet c***. In my thoughts I make love to you all day long."

"Bite it. You have to bite it."

"Never trust a sailor on dry land."

Jcomp
05-14-2008, 01:55 AM
Holy hell, I need to watch Atonement...

DWSTXS
05-14-2008, 01:57 AM
"We're going to have a sales contest. First place is a Cadillac. Second place is these steak knives. Third place is...you're fired!" Alec Baldwin - Glengarry Glen Ross

Mr Flibble
05-14-2008, 01:58 AM
Atonement: Me too, especially if there's naughty stuff in it!

Oh alright, I'll watch it for its arty worth

RLB
05-14-2008, 02:00 AM
Everything that Val Kilmer says in Tombstone,

"I'm your huckleberry."

*swoon*

RLB
05-14-2008, 02:04 AM
And from So I Married an Axe Murderer:

"HEAD! MOVE!"

maestrowork
05-14-2008, 02:16 AM
Where do they teach you to talk like this? In some Panama City "Sailor wanna hump-hump" bar, or is it getaway day and your last shot at his whiskey? Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here.

-- As Good As It Gets

sheadakota
05-14-2008, 03:03 AM
You're terminated fucker

Sarah Conner 'The Terminator'

CDarklock
05-14-2008, 03:12 AM
I think my personal favorite will always be:

"There is a secret song at the center of the world... and its sound is like razors through flesh." - Doug Bradley as Pinhead, Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth

ChaosTitan
05-14-2008, 03:31 AM
Merged IdiotsRUs's thread with this one. Just to keep things tidy. :)

childeroland
05-14-2008, 04:35 AM
Almost every line from All About Eve.

TerzaRima
05-14-2008, 05:46 AM
Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here.



God, yes. Also:

"I'm a god, I'm not the God...I think." (Groundhog Day)

cethklein
05-14-2008, 07:20 PM
Robin Hood: Men in Tights:

Blinkin: Oh master Robin! You lost your arms in battle! But you grew some nice boobs!

Latrine: We changes it in the tenth century.
John: You changed it to Latrine!?
Latrine: It used to be shithouse.
John: It's a good change!

Mafia Don: We're gonig to make him dead. D E D, dead.

Achew: What part of Georgia are you from, south central?

Hell pretty much every line in that movie.

Blazing Saddles:

"It's twoo, it's twoo!"

Spaceballs:

"I'm a mog, half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend."

"It's my virgin alarm, it's programmed to go off before you do."

"Whats the matter colonel Sanders, Chicken!?"

"How many assholes we got on this ship anyway?"
"WE ARE SIR!"
"Great, I'm surrounded by assholes."

"We aint found shit" (that whole "Comb The Desert" scene was priceless.)

"I see your Schwarts is as big as mine"

"Shit, I hate when my Schwarts gets twisted!"

"I am your uncle's cousin's best friend's roomate."
"So what does that make us?"
"Absolutely noting, which is what you are about to be!"

"Did you see anything?"
"No sir, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again."

"!12345? That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! It's something some idiot would use as the combination for their luggage."

"12345? That's amazing, I have that same combination on my luggage!"

"Who are you?"
"Barf!"
"Not in hear you don't, this is a Mercedes!"

Also favorites:

Every single word uttered by R. Lee ermey in Full Metal Jacket.

The "Lesbian Joke" scene in Boondock Saints.

The scene in Boondock Saints where they shoot the cat and the Italian guys goes "Is it dead?"

underthecity
05-14-2008, 07:57 PM
You forgot one:

Barf, this isn't about the money. This is about a SHITLOAD of money!

Serenity
05-14-2008, 08:36 PM
"It's Megamaid. She's gone from suck to blow!"

"F***! Even in the future nothing works!"

cethklein
05-14-2008, 11:18 PM
Damn you guys did find three I forgot. That whole movie was one big string of classic quotes.

"Snotty beamed me twice last night...it was wonderful!"

"There's only ONE MAN who would DARE give me the raspberry!! LONE STAR!".

"Spaceballs!? Oh shit, there goes the planet."

"Now you know the evil will always triumph because good is dumb."

"9...8...6"
"SIX! what happened to seven!?"
"Woops, sorry."

"I can't make decisions! I'm the president!"

"Spaceball One, they've gone plaid!"

"God willing we'll all meet again in Spaceballs 2: The Search For More Money."

"Infamous crime lord Pizza The Hutt locked himself in his car and ate himself to death."

rihannsu
05-14-2008, 11:43 PM
Damn you guys did find three I forgot. That whole movie was one big string of classic quotes.



I'm going to a Spaceballs Quote Along tomorrow night. :hooray:

DL Hegel
05-14-2008, 11:49 PM
"Because no matter how bad the dreams get... when I wake up it's always worse. " Alien: Resurrection

"Yes, Caveman. Drej bad, we good. Now go look at something shiny for a while." Titan AE

"'Pike' isn't a name. It's a fish." Buffy the vampire slayer movie
"I'm not disappointed, I'm just angry!" Buffy the vampire slayer movie
"Twelve hundred years old, and you behave like a child! Honestly, I don't know how you made it through the Crusades." Buffy the vampire slayer movie

"This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight... turbulence and then explode." Serenity
"Dear Buddha
I would like a pony and a plastic rocket."Serenity

Varthikes
05-15-2008, 12:16 PM
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom:

"We're completely surrounded. This place is full of living things!"
"That's why they call it a jungle, sweetheart."
--Willy and Indiana

"You know how to fly a plane, don't you?"
"No, do you?"
--Willy and Indiana, finding their plane is without pilots.

"I hate the water! I hate being wet! And, I hate YOU!"
"Good!"
--Willy and Indiana


Raiders of the Lost Ark:

"I'm going after that truck."
"How?"
"I don't know. I'm making this up as I go."
--Indiana and Sallah

HeronW
05-15-2008, 12:31 PM
"It's been swell, but the swelling's gone down." Tank Girl

James81
05-15-2008, 09:47 PM
This is one of my favorite ones, and I am going to give it to you in youtube form because it's just one of those quotes that is so much better delivered by Nicholoson:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HS3pYDZXQNc&feature=related

Jcomp
05-16-2008, 05:16 AM
*Players Watching Game Film*

Coach: What's your assignment?
Mack: Kill the quarterback. (Next slide) Hit the tight end so hard his girlfriend dies. (Next slide) Kill everybody.

-- The Program

Constantine K
05-16-2008, 05:27 AM
"Do I look like a cop?"

--Batman Begins

maestrowork
05-16-2008, 06:47 AM
Closer:

Dan: [impersonating a woman in a chatroom] wait have 2 type with 1 hand am cumming right now... ohohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoohohooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo+_*&^%$£!£$%&*&*^%&^%$££D!$%^&**&**&&*12303894848575us7sjc7d78s87o/s878usuiu7sbom/

James81
05-16-2008, 05:56 PM
"Do I look like a cop?"

--Batman Begins

:bowdown:

Lot of great stuff in that movie.

I also liked: Why do we fall? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.

Constantine K
05-16-2008, 09:36 PM
:bowdown:

Lot of great stuff in that movie.

I also liked: Why do we fall? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.


Yes, the whole movie has fantastic writing.

From The Dark Knight:

"I see now what I have to become to stop men like him."

It gives me chills!

Bmwhtly
05-22-2008, 05:58 PM
"But Jar Jar Binks makes the Ewoks look like... ****in'... Shaft!"

darrtwish
06-07-2008, 07:56 PM
Jo: Can I drive?
Bill: No
Jill: Then would you?

Meg: Okay, I'll go, but I'm gonna drive myself.
Rabbit: Honey, your car is in a tree around the corner.

Jo: God, he really does love himself. I thought it was a summer thing.

Bill: Jonas Miller. He's a night crawler. We all started out in the same lab, but Jonas went out and got himself some corporate sponsors. He's in it for the money, not the science. He's got a lot of high-tech gadgets, but he's got no instinct. And he doesn't have Dorothy. (And yes, I did just recite that from memory)

...Can you tell who's seen Twister to many times for their own good...

Prozyan
06-07-2008, 09:38 PM
Donnie: Why do you wear that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?


Gretchen: Some people are just born with tragedy in their blood.

ASRafferty
06-08-2008, 05:07 AM
From the original Producers movie -

"My blanket! My blue blanket! Give me my blue blanket!" (Bloom)



But what put me away was:

"I fell on my keys."

ASRafferty
06-08-2008, 06:16 AM
I'm supposed to be out eliminating world hunger tonight, but somehow this thread seemed more important.

A few more before I go...

"We sail into history!"

"She rescues him right back."

"It came to that the first time you sentenced a man to death you knew to be innocent."

"No one puts Baby in a corner."

"This is the kind of day that history tells us is better spent in bed."

"Dr. Samuel Johnson is right!"

"No, son... if I'd only gotten to be a doctor for five minutes -- THAT would have been a tragedy."

"One more thing, Senator... Love your suit!"

"How do you have patience for people who claim they love America, but clearly can't stand Americans?"

...and, of course:

"Write me well."

Varthikes
06-08-2008, 11:34 AM
From Dinosaur:

"Walking backwards, eh? Well, let me know if that gets you there any faster."
--Eema

"You like kids, I see."
"Well, the skinny ones can be a little chewy."
--Neera and Aladar

Buddikins
06-08-2008, 03:20 PM
Donnie: Why do you wear that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?


Gretchen: Some people are just born with tragedy in their blood.

I love Donnie Darko!

My signature is a quote from Benny and Joon. Anybody watched it? Lotta great quotes in that movie.
Joon: You're out of your tree.
Sam: It's, uh, not my tree

soleary
06-08-2008, 04:14 PM
"No one puts Baby in a corner."

Ken
06-08-2008, 04:15 PM
"Sands of Iwo Jima," 1949:

"All right, saddle up! Let's get back in the war!"

(Spoken after the Sergeant (John Wayne) gets killed.
The squadron is sad and teary-eyed about it.
But there's a mission to fulfill.
So no time for lamentation.
Grrr, grrr.)

MsK
06-09-2008, 02:58 AM
From Meet Joe Black

William Parrish- ( Anthony Hopkins) to his daughter:

"Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived."

That is just the greatest advice. I love those men. William Parrish and Anthony Hopkins.

OneTeam OneDream
06-09-2008, 03:12 AM
http://youtube.com/watch?v=KNib30GghKw


from Superbad...the clip must be watched to appreciate the quotes...the many quotes just from one scene.


Seth: I'll be like the Iron Chef of pounding Vagsh.

Mason
06-09-2008, 03:38 AM
Two that I never tire of:

Heist

Bobby Blane: Sometimes adrenaline gives people the shakes, some might think it's cowardice, so maybe you'd want to pray about it.

Jimmy: I'm not a religious man.

Bobby Blane: There's nothing wrong with prayer. We knew this firefighter, this trooper, who always caried a bible next to his heart. We used to mock him, but that bible stopped a bullet.

Jimmy: No shit?

Bobby Blane: Hand of God, that bible stopped a bullet, would of ruined that fucker's heart. And had he had another bible in front of his face, that man would be alive today.



Miller's Crossing

Cud: Tommy, the way you're goin'--horses got knees?

Tom: I dunno. Fetlocks.

Cud: Well the way you're goin', if I was a horse I'd be down on my fetlocks prayin' you don't bet on me!

jennifer75
06-13-2008, 02:19 AM
"if you're not first, you're last"

maestrowork
07-16-2008, 05:19 PM
Just watched Inside Man again. This one gave me the chuckles:


Dalton Russell: Soon I'm gonna be sucking down piña coladas in a hot tub with six girls named Amber and Tiffany.

Keith Frazier: No, it's more like in the shower with two guys named Jamal and Jesus... and here's the bad news; that thing you're sucking on? It's not a piña colada!

Ol' 61
07-30-2008, 05:36 AM
"Sometimes, the world doesn't fit, so we have to make adjustments." Stella, (Linda Hunt) in Silverado, as she grows taller while walking behind the bar.

"Mister, I don't want to kill you and you don't want to be dead!" Danny Glover's character, Mal, also in Silverado.

"There's no crying in baseball!" A League of Their Own

Oh, so many more!

sharla
07-31-2008, 09:01 PM
No one puts Baby in a corner.

There's no crying in baseball - forgot about that one but loved it!

You had me at hello.

To survive war, you have to become war. -- Rambo (one of 'em)

Tell'em hell's comin' and I'm comin' with it -- Tombstone
I'm your Huckleberry -- Tombstone
You're an angel... (woman gives him a cigarette as he's dying from TB)...then again you could be the antichrist -- Tombstone

Basically anything Doc Holliday (Val Kilmer) says in Tombstone is quote worthy. He makes that role so funny.

Cato
08-14-2008, 01:14 AM
"Draiiinage! Drainaaaage!"

"I drink your milkshake! (sucking noise) I drink it up!"

Both from There Will be Blood.

jamesn65
08-14-2008, 03:00 AM
"There's a cello in your house now."

from Rocket Science, though I doubt anyone's seen it or knows why the line's funny. :)

Gravity
08-14-2008, 03:13 AM
"Did IQ's suddenly drop while I was away?"--Ripley, Aliens

childeroland
08-14-2008, 03:25 AM
From the great Usual Suspects

Keaton always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him." Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Soze.

soleary
08-14-2008, 03:28 AM
From the fine art film, Dirty Dancing

"Nobody puts Baby in a Corner"

smcc360
08-14-2008, 04:33 AM
From Heist:

Dying Villain to Gene Hackman: "Don't you even want to hear my last words?"

Gene Hackman: "I just did." *Shoots Dying Villain*