I honestly never thought I'd say this...

Even God has to tweet y'know. :3

::head to desk, with force::

Pretty sure the Son of God won't need to provide proof on a website...

But that was amusing.

I notice he's white this time around - just like in all the pictures...

From the FAQ:

He walked, talked, slept, drank, ate, and was restricted by all the normalcies associated with being in a physical body. He did not fly through the air shooting laser-beams out of His eyes...

Click to expand...

Awwwww

Hang on a minute:

During the post WWII eugenics movement that swept the United States, Lord Ra-El's mother (Ruth, daughter of Mary) was surgically forced sterilized, and rendered completely unable to have children. Years later, she laid with a man named William Collins, an Italian man who was in the Army (Roman Soldier), this man was also a Rosicrucian (those that carry the hidden knowledge of Christ). By this union, Ruth miraculously became pregnant, and gave birth to Lord Ra-El under the sign of Gemini.

Click to expand...

For a start, I have to say that William Collins isn't exactly an Italian name. Seeing as Collins is Anglo Saxon/Irish/Welsh in origin. And teh Italian form of William is Guglielmo.

Interestingly, in modern Illuminist teachings, it is understood that the Collins bloodline is the "mystical line", that many believe is actually the true Davidic bloodline of Jesus.

Click to expand...

Collins? So that means Joan and Jackie Collins are....

Wasn't Superman's Dad's name Rael?

It's Jor-El.
uh. Not that I know that kind of stuff.

But, El means God in Hebrew I think.

lastlittlebird said:

From the FAQ:

He walked, talked, slept, drank, ate, and was restricted by all the normalcies associated with being in a physical body. He did not fly through the air shooting laser-beams out of His eyes...

Click to expand...

Awwwww

Click to expand...

Pistol Whipped Bee said:

Wasn't Superman's Dad's name Rael?

Click to expand...

So we'll have to wait for this chap's son for the flying and eye-lasers?

Well, in theory Ra-El is here for the end times... I assume his son is gonna be outfitted in a teeny space ship and blasted off just as we are all dying in a raging inferno of nuclear volcano climate changing aliens. Or something of the kind.
In other words, we don't get to see the lasers. Hence the

Speaking of space ships the Endeavor is about to go up. 6 mins to go.

the crappy photoshop blur job makes him so much more believable.

Who comes up with this stuff?

For your convenience, he does take PayPal and all major credit cards. Miracles are very expensive today. Loaves and fishes for 5000 doesn't just come out of thin air anymore, you know.

Wait - I thought the Son of God wasn't scheduled to return until this Saturday. Did he get here early??????

And, they waited until the third sentence to mention tithe and donations. I really miss George Carlin.

This sort of thing is so delicious....

At least our Lord and Savior has a website, tweets and takes paypal. Just think of the alternatives...

Wait... what's supposed to happen on Saturday?

Not that I'll believe it, but I like to be in on things.

Oh, Cliff, you hadn't heard the end is near? Very near? Like, Saturday?

::sigh::

Oh. Okay then.

So I'll be here Sunday with scorn.

They ought not act like that.

"Lord Ra-El (also spelled and pronounced Ray-El)"

Well, which is it? Ra-El, or Ray-El? How can they provide proof of his identity if he can go by multiple names or nicknames?

How about Jesus 2...

Jesus: The Sequel...

or my personal favorite, Jesus: Part Deux

damn- I'll have to trade in my WWJD braclet for a WWJT one(What would Jesus tweet)