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View Full Version : Holy Cow...I'm Shocked and a Little Bit Nervous...



Alpha Echo
05-09-2011, 08:29 PM
I think some of you know the gist of what my husband went through with his ex. I won't go into too many details, but I'll just say that she did her best to try to take his daughter away from him. She called Social Services several times and tried to accuse my husband of rape back when they first separated, and since then she's dragged him through court at least 10 times, the latest time being last year.

Aside from all the court appearances, she does what she can when she can to make things difficult. But she loves her daughter, and my husband would never try to wrestle full custody away from her.

They currently have joint legal custody and joint visitation, and right now things have been good.

So good that the ex had my stepdaughter call me yesterday to wish me "Happy Stepmother's Day!"

Weird...what is she planning?

Beyond that, she and I have been emailing back and forth all day about the goodies for the goody bags for the Little One's bday party this coming Sunday. She's even asking my opinion, and the emails are pleasant.

This is all, despite what she's done to my ex, giving me hope. My husband, however, keeps warning to me to be cautious because we never know when the perverbial next shoe will drop. He's certain it will, and we'll end up in court sometime again within the next couple years.

He said the ex probably has a contract out on me, and she felt guilty, so she decided to be nice until I'm gone. LOL

backslashbaby
05-09-2011, 08:59 PM
Ooooh. Be happy enough, but don't you go feeling easy around her! If she's that manipulative and awful, chances are the honey is to get what she wants, one way or another.

Have you ever met one of those charming sociopaths? I knew one, and it would blow your mind how they act! Like the stuff out of movies, seriously. No conscience at all.

Maryn
05-09-2011, 09:01 PM
Hope you've got a Carry Permit.

It's hard to tell what's going on in someone else's head. She's probably going through a somewhat mellow period, and it won't last forever. Enjoy a better relationship with her while you can, and try not to be too taken aback when it ends, because it will.

Maryn, whose family goings-on are pretty tame in comparison

CaroGirl
05-09-2011, 09:26 PM
Maybe the maturity wind blew in. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Alpha Echo
05-09-2011, 09:27 PM
Thanks, guys. It's like a chess game where we always try to anticipate her movements and keep 5 steps ahead. So far, so good. I mean, my husband's won every time in court, even when he stopped using a lawyer.

Sooo...yeah.

The recent kindness just puts me on edge.

lndsymllr
05-09-2011, 09:33 PM
It really does sound like she is in a mellow state at the moment. But I agree with everyone else, it won't last. Just be on the lookout for it. And Good Luck!

stormie
05-09-2011, 09:59 PM
Part of me says "enjoy," but the paranoid part says "watch your back." Watch what you say, watch what you write to her in the emails. At least for the next two hundred years.

But hey, you never know. Maybe she's mellowing. For your sake, I sure hope so.

Snowstorm
05-09-2011, 10:28 PM
Echoing everyone above thread, Alpha Echo. Keep your guard up. I wonder if she's on medication???? I just hope she learned all she's doing is making herself miserable and looking like a jerk. Here's hoping all goes well for you and your family.

Alpha Echo
05-09-2011, 10:51 PM
Hope you've got a Carry Permit.



I actually do! LOL


Echoing everyone above thread, Alpha Echo. Keep your guard up. I wonder if she's on medication???? I just hope she learned all she's doing is making herself miserable and looking like a jerk. Here's hoping all goes well for you and your family.

No, she's not on meds. She learned to be the way she is from her mother and maybe, partly, from her Japanese culture. And that's the thing...she doesn't think things through. Everytime something pops up (and it does almost every couple of weeks), after my husband and I explode over it to each other, we sit back and laugh because time and time again, she only does things that in the end make her look silly in court and make us look good.

The last one was insane. The Little One had a band loose on her braces, and it was our day. We do the drop offs at school to maximize the time together, and I usually pick her up.

The ex first wanted me to pick her up and take her to the orthodontist. She called both myself and my husband. Then, she decided I can't because I'm not a parent or guardian.

My husband finally just says "Text me the address."

She ended up emailing it to me.

Even though she didn't want me to go.

Then she accused my husband of denying her right to be there. Because she's insane and thinks both parents need to be there for every doctor appointment. Even yearly physicals. (She tried to make hubby look bad in court for not attending one once. Then he started going to every single one...but now he doesn't b/c it's just silly). Truth was, my husband never said that. He did say that it was our day with the Little One, so we'd somehow make sure she got to the appointment. (Because the ex said she could take off work early and take her).

Devil Ledbetter
05-10-2011, 12:36 AM
Thanks, guys. It's like a chess game where we always try to anticipate her movements and keep 5 steps ahead. So far, so good. I mean, my husband's won every time in court, even when he stopped using a lawyer.

Sooo...yeah.

The recent kindness just puts me on edge.Having had front row seats to my SIL's ugly custody battle (she and her daughter lived with us after the split) I completely understand your trepidation. SIL's ex saw every interaction as an opportunity to make nasty in court. Patience and politeness are lovely, but trust has no place in this kind of situation.

mirandashell
05-10-2011, 12:37 AM
Absolutely cover your ass at all times.

Alpha Echo
05-10-2011, 02:23 PM
Yup. We're always holding our breath as we round the corner, you know?

Ah well. My husband warned me about her before we got married. I knew all about their past, and he warned me that she will never, ever stop being the manipulative bitch she is. He warned me that if I married him, I'd basically be marrying her, in an odd sort of way.

I married him anyway. I love him and my stepdaughter so much my heart aches because I can feel the love in there filling it up. We can fight through anything on that type of love.

Hopefully.