My characters are crappy kissers

Huh. Now that I think about it, I've never spent more than a paragraph on kissing. Sex yes, kissing no. Wonder if that's a problem? IRL I'm not a big fan of kissing.

Kissing is more intimate than sex, so I find it harder to write as well.

No. Actually, your husband sounds like a lucky guy

Sarah Madara said:

Oh, I am! I'm a huge fan of kissing! Sex, too, of course, but the kissing is so wonderful... the stirring of excitement in your belly like when an elevator goes down really quickly, the warmth, the wondering whether he's going to get a little bolder with his hands....

Kissing is such a wonderful combination of touch and anticipation.

Does this enthusiasm mean I've been married too long? Hmmm.

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Maybe you should write all of this into internal dialogue. It sounds good

It's not really about the kissing, but the character's feelings and emotions surrounding it - the tension. Your second post sounded good, try to feed those ideas into the scene.

serabeara said:

Your second post sounded good, try to feed those ideas into the scene.

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Agreed. I made some notes to include in future scenes.

I don't descibe kissing that much. I think the last phrase I used was "she softened under his open mouth." or something like that.

Only a small part of kissing is focused on the mouth. Remember that much.

Do you mean there are other places to be kissed? Or other sensations/places affected by the kiss?

Both? Neither?

You should block it out. This way you can get a feel for what is going on technically (how they are standing, what arms are doing where bodies are pressed together) and then you can translate that into your book. If nothing else, you get to have some fun "doing research"

amrose said:

Do you mean there are other places to be kissed? Or other sensations/places affected by the kiss?

Both? Neither?

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Both. For instance, hands in the hair. The way someone tastes or smells. The stomach-churning just before someone kisses you for the first time.

Agree with the advice given. It's more than lips smooshing together.

There is the lead up, anticipating that first touch and taste of a lover's mouth, the gentle first brush of his lips on hers. The heat if his hand opening against her back, pressing her to him. There is the smell of his skin, the lingering spice of his shaving cream or cologne.

Then one of them makes that first move, a tongue grazing over a lip. Goosebumps raise over her arms and she shivers before leaning into him and surrendering to the sensation. He makes a growling noise deep in his throat and wraps his arms around her...

Ah yes, so much more to kissing than lips and mouth an tongue. Rawr...

Ahaha - this made me laugh, because I feel the same sort of stymied consternation every time my characters go to kiss. I always feel like I muddle through it, but it usually works out okay.

Ditto the others. Any sort of love scene is about much more than simply the physical actions.


In addition to the other suggestions, why not re-read a bunch of kissing scenes in your favorite romances and see how they're handled? Really pay attention to what the author is doing, what sorts of feelings they're invoking, how much of the section is physical act and how much is emotional reaction (and how much is physical reaction). That might help you get a better feel for them.

Sarah Madara said:

Thanks for all the suggestions, everyone. Writing about it here loosened me up a bit for my WIP

VoireyLinger, I'll be looking up some of your stuff...

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Try to involve more than just what people would see. Whenever possible, involve other senses - how your lover smells, how their lips taste or feel, the sensation of their fingertips (and what are they doing? Are they caressing their cheek? Stroking their back? Playing with their hair?), what sounds (if any) are part of "the moment".

Edit: One other thing: while a rushed or inadequately written foreplay might not kill a sexual or romantic scene; a poorly written kissing session often will.

I keep thinking of Princess Bride and the line about it being one of the great kisses of all time.

My advice would be to collect some text of excellent kisses and see why those passages work.

My contribution would be Sergeanne Golon's Angelique in Love. Several very fine kisses in that volume.