Nothing I write is commercially viable

Mr. Anonymous · Mar 11, 2011

I mean, I wrote a flash story about shallots for christ's sake. Shallots! I don't even know what a shallot is!

also, an agent has my revisions for my latest commercially unviable novel which I sent on Saturday and she said she wouldn't get to it till monday or tuesday and it's friday now which makes it three to four days (yes I know it's friday morning I'm rounding up) and you guys are probably thinking I'm crazy but this agent is THE FASTEST RESPONDER EVER which means by now she's probably already read my revisions (and now I'm thinking I didn't revise enough) and she hasn't made an offer which means one of two things:

1. She's not sure whether to reject me completely (considering the amount of time etc she's spent on my book already) or ask for more revisions.

2. She's not sure whether to offer rep or ask for more revisions.

discuss.

Drachen Jager · Mar 11, 2011

I think, if she's been an agent for some years now, she's probably developed a pretty decisive approach to these things. I highly doubt any agents with much time under their belts spends much time wondering whether or not to take on a client. By the time they're done reading they should already know.

I think it's more likely she's just busy. Fast responder or not, life does sometimes get in the way. An author may need something extra, she or a loved one could be sick, hell, maybe she's visiting Japan right now, who knows? There's no point in stressing over it.

Phaeal · Mar 11, 2011

As for the shallots, write what you eat.

As for the agent:

3. She hasn't gotten to it yet.

4. She's reading it right now.

5. All the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, etc.

If she's been working with you on the book for a while, she's serious about it -- agents don't sweat revisions pre-rep without feeling a strong attraction to the work.

Go eat some shallots. They're good for the nerves.

Chris P · Mar 11, 2011

6. This is a slow business and nobody is sitting around wishing they had more to do. A polite nudge might be in order if she's promised a response by a certain time.

RobJ · Mar 11, 2011

Mr. Anonymous said:
I mean, I wrote a flash story about shallots for christ's sake. Shallots! I don't even know what a shallot is!

also, an agent has my revisions for my latest commercially unviable novel which I sent on Saturday and she said she wouldn't get to it till monday or tuesday and it's friday now which makes it three to four days (yes I know it's friday morning I'm rounding up) and you guys are probably thinking I'm crazy but this agent is THE FASTEST RESPONDER EVER which means by now she's probably already read my revisions (and now I'm thinking I didn't revise enough) and she hasn't made an offer which means one of two things:

1. She's not sure whether to reject me completely (considering the amount of time etc she's spent on my book already) or ask for more revisions.

2. She's not sure whether to offer rep or ask for more revisions.

discuss.

3. The agent has checked Google to find matches for your name, to see if you've got any history, and is now wading through the results.

Please be patient, Anonymous.

Mr. Anonymous · Mar 11, 2011

lol. To be clear, I was half serious, half joking, and just sort of wanted to tell some peeps that would understand.

drachen - actually, you'd be surprised. Speaking as someone who interned briefly at a lit agency, sometimes agents really do hold onto things they're unsure about for a bit, and even as an intern I found myself setting certain things aside for a second look. No, I'm pretty sure she's reading by now, but you're right, she might not have finished.

phael - not really a while in terms of time, but she did spend a decent amount of effort sending me revision notes, called me to talk about revisions, etc. Also, how can I eat something if I don't know what it is? This is actually a subject I deal with in my (now rejected) flash story titled What is a Shallot?

Chrisp - business is slow, but believe me, this agent works at the speed of sound. She didn't promise to respond within a certain time, no, and I'm definitely not crazy enough to nudge this soon (though that doesn't stop me from whining on message boards.)

robj - trying. lol. I've googled myself before, nothing particularly interesting has come up. Just my facebook profile, my single publication, and a bunch of college newspaper articles. But I doubt she's doing that-if she were interested in googling me, surely she would have done that before (yeah, I know what you meant, I'm just being intentionally dense.)

Phaeal · Mar 11, 2011

She has a lovely face, the Lady of Shallots! And, man, can she cook.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shallot

kaitie · Mar 11, 2011

My agent is also notoriously fast for fulls, and he didn't get back on my revisions until after two months had passed--and usually he's back in under two weeks. I was pretty much wondering the same thing and I thought he'd forgotten. Turned out he'd taken longer because he'd wanted to give it another pass. Nerve-wracking, though, isn't it?

Mr. Anonymous · Mar 11, 2011

phael - wow. So a shallot is basically just a glorified onion. I feel oddly disappointed (I'd really been hyping them up, these shallots.) Like a kid who finds out that Santa Claus is just some fat old dude named Marty who wanted to make some extra cash during the holiday season.

Kaitie - yeah, nerve wracking is right! Of course 3-4 days is nothing compared to 2 months. How did you keep your sanity? lol.

Jamesaritchie · Mar 11, 2011

Drachen Jager said:
I think, if she's been an agent for some years now, she's probably developed a pretty decisive approach to these things. I highly doubt any agents with much time under their belts spends much time wondering whether or not to take on a client. By the time they're done reading they should already know.

.

You know you defnitely don't want someone as a client the moment you stop reading, but it's often much harder to decide whether you do want them as a client. Most agents can only take on a tiny few new clients each year, often only one or two, and there may be half a dozen or more writers who all have manuscripts that are a reasonably good fit.

When this happens, and it isn't rare, it can take a great deal more time.

Nothing I write is commercially viable

Mr. Anonymous

Just a guy with a pen & a delusion

Drachen Jager

Professor of applied misanthropy

Phaeal

Whatever I did, I didn't do it.

Chris P

Likes metaphors mixed, not stirred

RobJ

Mr. Anonymous

Just a guy with a pen & a delusion

Phaeal

Whatever I did, I didn't do it.

kaitie

With great power comes

Mr. Anonymous

Just a guy with a pen & a delusion

Jamesaritchie