Unwanted gift swap

bettielee

I'm a sparkly fairy princess!
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I'll take the unpaid week off work and give you this awesome pair of mittens so tiny I don't think a Japanese school girl could wear and this old hunk of some sort of homebaked catastrophy... I think it's walnut bread... or it has walnuts on the top, or it has growths that look like walnuts....
 

alleycat

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Someone once gave me a battery powered electric tie rack ("Hey, look, it will save you from having to reach over that extra eight inches!"). I still have the thing in the original box (because I sure ain't planning on using it).

I will swap for just about anything but a Chia pet or one of those Fushigi balls.
 
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I've got Karl Urban loafing around the house and he's not really much use to me. You can have him for Aidan Turner and a bucket of maltesers.
 

Mr Flibble

They've been very bad, Mr Flibble
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I've got Karl Urban loafing around the house and he's not really much use to me. You can have him for Aidan Turner and a bucket of maltesers.


It just so happens I have an Aidan in the cellar. He might be a bit shop soiled. But I'll add in some Quality Street?
 

Writer5

New kid, be gentle!
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I've had pleurisy, so no thanks. I'd rather work (except that I'm retired) but if I come up with a mild cold or sore throat after you've healed, maybe we can talk then. Get well!
 
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It just so happens I have an Aidan in the cellar. He might be a bit shop soiled. But I'll add in some Quality Street?
Ooh, my favourite! Bung in a bottle of lucozade and I'll send you some free baby oil for the jacuzzi. :D
 

Writer5

New kid, be gentle!
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I was given something similar and called it "wart" cake. Why do people do that? Don't they taste what they make before sending it out to others? Or maybe they DO taste it and that's why they give it away.
 

Priene

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I've got a crate of Owd Roger, a Heston Blumenthal christmas pud, a 1978 Rich Kids T-Shirt and sclerosis of the soul. I'll give it all to the person who can guarantee Bruce Forsyth never appears on television again.
 

Shakesbear

knows a hawk from a handsaw
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I've got torn ligaments in my shoulder (don't ask!) for which I have been given pain killers which are bigger than smarties and are shocking pink. Priene if I send you some of the pink pills you won't care if BF appears on the telly again - you won't even care if it is Monday or breakfast.
 

Kaiser-Kun

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A sticker bearing the confederate flag and text HERITAGE, NOT HATE appeared in my car trunk last month. Take it away fro me.
 

Mr Flibble

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I've got a crate of Owd Roger, a Heston Blumenthal christmas pud, a 1978 Rich Kids T-Shirt and sclerosis of the soul. I'll give it all to the person who can guarantee Bruce Forsyth never appears on television again.


I'll take your Owd Roger (and probably some liver failure). *loads shotgun* All right my love?
 

RichardLeon

I have words. Be afraid.
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I have -10C of cold.

Would consider a swap with someone who owns a Caribbean island and has a lot of stuff that needs to be kept chilled. (Fish fingers, pizza, flesh eating shape shifters from space, etc.)
 

Jersey Chick

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I have a really creepy Raggedy Ann and Andy doll-thing (they are conjoined, to make them creepier still) that sings I Got You Babe. For some reason known only to her, my MIL gave it to me last Christmas. I don't know why.

(I made my husband put it out in the shed because I can't sleep if it - they?- are in the same house as me.)
 

Devil Ledbetter

Come on you stranger, you legend,
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you martyr and shine.
I have a wicked crush on a barista half my age. Would gladly trade that for some high-end wrinkle cream.
 

Caitlin Black

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Sorry Devil - I already have a wicked crush on a barista. Though she's not half my age... if she were half my age she'd be 13, and that'd just be so wrong... I'd guess she's actually about 20.

I have a DVD copy of Alien that someone can take if they want it.
 

Caitlin Black

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I just received a present that I want to get rid of:

A thank-you note from last semester's Uni lecturer, who I did not like.

I'll accept nothing less than a coffee-maker for this valuable item. :D