What would be so wrong?

popmuze · Dec 9, 2010

Okay, at the suggestion of everyone on the planet, I'm deleting this. Not sure how to do it officially.

Calla Lily · Dec 9, 2010

Is it the truth? Then you should notify them as common courtesy.

Is it a lie? Then go ahead and f*** your writing career. Publishing's a small world. News will get around.

ETA: You're serious, aren't you? Wow.

aekap · Dec 9, 2010

Oy. This is so bad for so many reasons. Basically, you are asking to jump the line in front of all the people who submitted work earlier than you. It's a really crappy way to operate. If your story is great, you just have to be patient.

Read this blog post for an agent's point of view:

http://agencygatekeeper.blogspot.com/2010/07/how-do-we-know-youre-lying-wellll.html

and this:

http://agencygatekeeper.blogspot.com/2010/01/you-know-how-im-always-saying-that-you.html

I really hope you aren't considering this. Do you really to start your relationship with your agent, a relationship that could go on for twenty years, with you schemeing him?

Truth and Fiction · Dec 9, 2010

It's an ill-advised, dishonest, sneaky, and, frankly, not very original idea.

Also, as far as #9 goes, that's not true in the slightest. Sorry, but there are no shortcuts. You have to slog through the submission process like every other writer out there. If you want to take more control, then make your book even better so that one day an agent can't say no.

Jamesaritchie · Dec 9, 2010

popmuze said:
This is purely theoretical, and I haven't done it, but what would be so wrong about emailing the six agents who've had my full manuscript for more than a month to tell them I've just gotten an offer of representation and I'm politely giving them a week to make a counter offer?

1) Wouldn't this make them more inclined to immediately read my book?
2) Wouldn't they be reading it with a slightly different attitude, thinking another agent already likes it?
3) How would they ever find out I don't have an actual offer?
4) And if some of them don't bother getting back to me, I can always email them later to say I decided not to go with the agent who made the offer.
5) If they asked me who the offering agent was, I would respectfully cite agent/author privilege.
6) You mean, they're going to call 167 other agents and ask if any of them just offered to represent me?
7) Like, even though they work out of different offices, all agents really belong to one big all powerful AGENCY?
8) Would this really spoil things for all writers who have legitimate offers on the table?
9) Isn't it true that some agents won't even start reading your requested full until you tell them another agent is interested?
10) I mean, it's the Wild Wild West, right?

It's a good idea, if you're telling the truth. If you're lying it just makes you a liar. Who wants to have a working relationship with a liar?

Besides, why on earth would any of these agents make a counter offer? You now have an agent, obviously one you wanted, or you wouldn't have queried her, so good luck and farewell. Have a great life.

But the main thing is no one wants to work with a liar, and a liar is a liar.

Lying and manipulation is always a bad idea. Either your book is good enough, or it isn't. A good book will sell, but a good book from a writer who lies and tries to manipulate you is going to have to sell through someone else, cause the agents in question probably will find out.

And they've seen it all before.

Perks · Dec 9, 2010

Well, your blog is connected here through your AW profile, and of course your profile is connected to this gem.

It wouldn't be that difficult and agents and editors do research their writers. It might only be found after the fact, but you certainly wouldn't look very good. In fact, you might want to ask that this thread be deleted. Kinda soon.

CheyElizabeth · Dec 9, 2010

If you have SIX agents with your full MS, then you don't need to be sneaky and cheat. Just wait it out, six agents are a very good sign that your work is likeable without tricks.

rainsmom · Dec 9, 2010

Exactly how arrogant and entitled are you?

kaitlin008 · Dec 9, 2010

It's a horrible idea, like everyone else has said. Sure, it'd make them read your full faster, but even all the moral issues aside, it doesn't make them any more likely to offer. And if they're really busy & don't have time to read it immediately, they might just bow out.

Also I think if I were an agent, it'd send up a HUGE red flag if someone gave me a week to offer and then sent me another email and said they'd decided not to go with the offering agent, but still refused to give any details about said agent. Agents aren't stupid, and they don't like to be lied to (just like any other human being.)

I agree with callalily--word will get around. And if you have to have that long of a list of ways to keep them from finding out, you must know how completely and grossly immoral it is to do it.

Just wait. Like everyone else. Be patient. If an agent's going to fall in love with your book, they'll fall in love with it whether it takes them three days or three months to start reading it.

Perks · Dec 9, 2010

kaitlin008 said:
It's a horrible idea, like everyone else has said. Sure, it'd make them read your full faster, but even all the moral issues aside, it doesn't make them any more likely to offer. And if they're really busy & don't have time to read it immediately, they might just bow out.

Also I think if I were an agent, it'd send up a HUGE red flag if someone gave me a week to offer and then sent me another email and said they'd decided not to go with the offering agent, but still refused to give any details about said agent. Agents aren't stupid, and they don't like to be lied to (just like any other human being.)

Ha! This is exactly what happened to me. I got an offer, then one power house agent backed out because he didn't have time. I did get another offer, one that I actually took, and that was one of the first things she asked me.

So you're going to tell your new agent "mind your business"? Yikes.

popmuze · Dec 9, 2010

That's why I love this place. Otherwise I might have jumped off that bridge, or some other bridge, long ago.

Meanwhile, I really like this Agency Gatekeeper person. I'd query her, but how do I know she isn't already in possession of my query?

aadams73 · Dec 9, 2010

popmuze said:
This is purely theoretical, and I haven't done it, but what would be so wrong about emailing the six agents who've had my full manuscript for more than a month to tell them I've just gotten an offer of representation and I'm politely giving them a week to make a counter offer?

No. Just...no.

When I received an offer of representation from my (now) agent, I emailed the other agents who had my materials and provided them with the offering agent's name. If you don't tell them, chances are at least one will ask anyway. And then what? Are you going to make up a name and lie?

Bad idea.

Two weeks after I'd accepted my agent's offer of representation, she was down this way and we met up for lunch. One of the things she asked me was, "So, who was my competition?" I told her, of course, and it turns out that one of those agents is a very good friend of hers.

Publishing is a much tinier community than you think. People talk.

Be professional--always.

aadams73 · Dec 9, 2010

popmuze said:
Meanwhile, I really like this Agency Gatekeeper person. I'd query her, but how do I know she isn't already in possession of my query?

Who she is isn't really a secret. Her name is linked to that blog over at Query Tracker.

She read my full and I have to say she's a lovely, gracious, and professional young woman. Anyone would be lucky to have her as their agent from what I know of her.

kaitlin008 · Dec 9, 2010

aadams73 said:
When I received an offer of representation from my (now) agent, I emailed the other agents who had my materials and provided them with the offering agent's name.

I also did this. I know some people don't divulge the name of the offering agent unless asked, but like you said, plenty of agents do ask.

Esmeralda · Dec 9, 2010

Thank you aekap for the gatekeeper info.

We are all going crazy waiting, some for agents, some for editors, some for inspiration.

Hair falling out in clumps, fingernails no longer in existance, lips chewed to pieces; all in the same boat.
Patience is a virtue they say, yeah right. Patience is highly overrated. I hate waiting, I hate being surprised. I want to know NOW. Too bad.

I want an agent to love my work because they love it...not because I fooled them into thinking someone else was going to beat them to the punch.
I spent years writing, editing, and rewriting this work. It's my baby. I can afford to wait a bit longer for just the right person to shepherd it through the impossible labyrinth of publishing.
No shortcuts for me.

Susan Coffin · Dec 9, 2010

Oh my.

gothicangel · Dec 9, 2010

Glad common sense has prevailed.

Plotting something dishonest is always going to blow up in the creator's face. Publishing is a small industry, people talk - and often.

whacko · Dec 9, 2010

Hey pops,

Fortune favours the brave.

Me, I'd lie to any agent that was wavering about my signature being appended on the dotted line.

On the other hand...

The six agents might not be wavering. And that would put you up a certain creek without the neccessary implements.

Regards

Whacko

blacbird · Dec 9, 2010

gothicangel said:
Plotting something dishonest is always going to blow up in the creator's face. Publishing is a small industry, people talk - and often.

Famous recent example: James Frey.

aekap · Dec 9, 2010

This thread is putting me in mind of one Veruca Salt ("I want it now, Daddy!")

Yeah, the waiting is hard. But just think, it'll give you extra time to decide how you'll describe your book to Oprah.

Bubastes · Dec 9, 2010

The best cure for waiting: working on something else.

Jamesaritchie · Dec 9, 2010

whacko said:
Hey pops,

Fortune favours the brave.

Me, I'd lie to any agent that was wavering about my signature being appended on the dotted line.

On the other hand...

The six agents might not be wavering. And that would put you up a certain creek without the neccessary implements.

Regards

Whacko

Being brave and being a liar are not the same thing. Fortune may favor the brave, but no one favors a liar.

Kristoff · Dec 9, 2010

Bubastes said:
The best cure for waiting: working on something else.

^This.

whacko · Dec 9, 2010

Jamesaritchie said:
Being brave and being a liar are not the same thing. Fortune may favor the brave, but no one favors a liar.

As Bill Clinton found out perchance?

Calla Lily · Dec 9, 2010

whacko said:
Me, I'd lie to any agent that was wavering about my signature being appended on the dotted line.

Wow. Just... wow.

Don't quit your day job. I hope you don't lie for your own convenience there.

What would be so wrong?

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