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Perks
11-29-2010, 02:52 AM
Okay guys, how do I make amends?

On Tuesday, the lady who lives at the end of our block (and who is the mother of one of my daughter's friends) dropped by after the schoolbus pulled up to ask if I would pick up a package for her that would be delivered while she was out of town for the holiday.

I had just gotten out of the shower, so I was towel-headed and bathrobed and surprised to have a visitor in my foyer. I don't know her, really, at all. But none of this is any excuse for the fact that I agreed to do it and promptly never thought of it again until about three minutes ago when she called and asked for the package.

She's pissed. I don't blame her.

One of the other neighbors probably picked it up for her (I hope, I hope, I hope) but what should I do to express my apology? I feel terrible. Of course, I've apologized over the phone, but I feel like I should do something else.

Any suggestions?

Snowstorm
11-29-2010, 03:38 AM
How were you to know when the package was to be delivered?

To me, Perks, you've done all you can, especially since how were you to know it was delivered?

ETA: Did YOU get a delivery notice as a reminder?

whacko
11-29-2010, 03:53 AM
Hey Perksy,

If you didn't get the package it's hardly your fault. It's the postman's.

Now, if I was in your block you'd really know about terrible neighbours.:D

scarletpeaches
11-29-2010, 03:57 AM
Mmm, Perks fresh from the shower... :drool

Sorry, what?

alleycat
11-29-2010, 04:09 AM
It's probably not one of those "I will hate you forever" things. Her anger will lessen once she gets the package; she was probably just looking forward to getting it this evening and now is disappointed. Go and apologize again tomorrow, say you just plain forgot with so much going on over the long holiday weekend, and she'll probably understand.

Perks
11-29-2010, 04:17 AM
How were you to know when the package was to be delivered?

To me, Perks, you've done all you can, especially since how were you to know it was delivered?

ETA: Did YOU get a delivery notice as a reminder?No, it was being delivered to her house and she thought it was going to get there on Tuesday, but it was going to be later and I was supposed to fetch it from her doorstep. I guess I was just supposed to check daily until it got there, but, well, I didn't.

Because I am a schmuck.

Perks
11-29-2010, 04:19 AM
Hey Perksy,

If you didn't get the package it's hardly your fault. It's the postman's.

Now, if I was in your block you'd really know about terrible neighbours.:D
Yeah, now that you're a non-smoker, you'd be lousy for the neighborhood watch. Never going out in the dark for smokes and catching burglars unawares...

sassandgroove
11-29-2010, 04:24 AM
I'd say all you can do is apologize. If she doesn't accept the apology that's her problem. It sounds like an honest mistake. You didn't intentionally neglect your duty.

whacko
11-29-2010, 04:50 AM
Yeah, now that you're a non-smoker, you'd be lousy for the neighborhood watch. Never going out in the dark for smokes and catching burglars unawares...

Oh, I don't know. With the cravings kicking in, any burglar with a pack of Marlboros in his pocket would find me a cheap bribe. A smoke free burglar would be sent straight to jail.

I'm sure there's a moral in there somewhere!

And for reminding me about my tenuous grasp on smoke-free lungs, I'm now on your neighbour's side.

Ya bitch!:D:D

Regards

Whacko

ETA - trust me, it's funny when you're drunk.

Perks
11-29-2010, 04:52 AM
And for reminding me about my tenuous grasp on smoke-free lungs, I'm now on your neighbour's side.

You're doing great, you clown. I'm keeping tabs on you.


And I sent my neighbor an email, so I hope it helps. I just hope to god the package wasn't stolen. What if it was full of important Christmas stuff?!

Silver King
11-29-2010, 04:58 AM
It could be worse. At least she doesn't think you stole the package. Or does she? For all we know, she might be filing a police report at this very moment and naming you as a suspect!

Perks
11-29-2010, 05:03 AM
Oh man. There you go. That explain the SWAT team on the roof.

Silver King
11-29-2010, 05:23 AM
On the bright side, she'll probably never ask you again for a favor. And that's a blessing in disguise, since the last thing you most likely need is yet another person who expects you to be of service while she takes advantage of your good nature. What starts out as retrieving a package one day can quickly escalate into a request to house watch and babysit their kids and dogs while they go on a two week cruise...

In other words, it's not such a bad thing that you (seemingly) can't be replied upon by this person.

Btw, if the parcel was to be delivered by UPS, she should have left you with a tracking number so you could have traced the package online to find out when it was delivered. Expecting you to keep a constant eye out on the expected day of its arrival was asking a bit much of you, I think, whether you remembered to do so or not.

whacko
11-29-2010, 05:28 AM
What if it was full of important Christmas stuff?!

That's okay. There's still 25 shoplifting days left till Christmas.

In a manner of speaking...

So I'll be keeping tabs on you too, young lady. No idea what manner these tabs will involve, but, rest assured, I will skimp on any research any required. :D

KTC
11-29-2010, 07:44 AM
Your mistake was agreeing to do it in the first place. I would have told her no, maybe she could find someone else she knows better to do it for her.

kayleamay
11-29-2010, 08:21 AM
I really think that the only thing you can do is move. Sell your house to a group of circus crackheads who barbecue cats in the front yard every Sunday morning wearing nothing but cutoffs and tube tops. Maybe then she'll finally appreciate you .

Man, I should have an advice column or something. I'm like, way good at this.

;)

kinshipknight
11-29-2010, 09:42 AM
Just continue apologizing. I'm sure she'll calm down once she gets the package.

fwc
11-29-2010, 09:50 AM
Your mistake was agreeing to do it in the first place. I would have told her no, maybe she could find someone else she knows better to do it for her.

Off-topic: that is a brooding look from your avi, is that you?

czjaba
11-29-2010, 10:08 AM
Have you ever been to her house for a visit? Just for a cup of coffee or chit-chat or something? If not, I think she had no right to ask you to 'keep watch' for a package anyway. Not sure how you mail system works, but with ours, it could be any time of the day between 10 am and 3 pm. That, IMO, is a little much to ask a neighbor to do. You've apologized and I think that is enough. Maybe the package still hasn't arrived.

Susan Littlefield
11-29-2010, 10:15 AM
Okay guys, how do I make amends?

On Tuesday, the lady who lives at the end of our block (and who is the mother of one of my daughter's friends) dropped by after the schoolbus pulled up to ask if I would pick up a package for her that would be delivered while she was out of town for the holiday.

I had just gotten out of the shower, so I was towel-headed and bathrobed and surprised to have a visitor in my foyer. I don't know her, really, at all. But none of this is any excuse for the fact that I agreed to do it and promptly never thought of it again until about three minutes ago when she called and asked for the package.

She's pissed. I don't blame her.

One of the other neighbors probably picked it up for her (I hope, I hope, I hope) but what should I do to express my apology? I feel terrible. Of course, I've apologized over the phone, but I feel like I should do something else.

Any suggestions?

I would say let it go. You have already apologized to her for your mistake.

Snowstorm
11-29-2010, 10:15 AM
Have you ever been to her house for a visit? Just for a cup of coffee or chit-chat or something? If not, I think she had no right to ask you to 'keep watch' for a package anyway. Not sure how you mail system works, but with ours, it could be any time of the day between 10 am and 3 pm. That, IMO, is a little much to ask a neighbor to do. You've apologized and I think that is enough. Maybe the package still hasn't arrived.


QFT

KTC
11-29-2010, 02:10 PM
Off-topic: that is a brooding look from your avi, is that you?

That is Andy Warhol. Anyone on planet earth should know that.

Wayne K
11-29-2010, 02:49 PM
I know, and I'm a moron

Wayne K
11-29-2010, 02:49 PM
He invented Campbells soup right?

Bmwhtly
11-29-2010, 02:50 PM
Okay guys, how do I make amends?Ritual suicide.

Take your sharpest knife to the front of her house. You shouldn't actually venture onto her property, but on the pavement in front. Yell 'Forgive me' first, so that they're watching.

Then, with someone standing by to haul away your corpse, insert the knife upwards so that it goes under the ribcage through the heart. You may have to have a couple of goes before you hit the heart, but try and keep it under double figures.

If she doesn't forgive you then, have your children avenge your death.

alleycat
11-29-2010, 02:55 PM
He invented Campbells soup right?
No, that was Glen Campbell.

KTC
11-29-2010, 03:33 PM
He invented Campbells soup right?


No, that was Glen Campbell.

Sometimes, even smiling makes my face ache.

poetinahat
11-29-2010, 03:58 PM
Your mistake was agreeing to do it in the first place. I would have told her no, maybe she could find someone else she knows better to do it for her.
QFdamn-i-hope-i-remember-that


I really think that the only thing you can do is move. Sell your house to a group of circus crackheads who barbecue cats in the front yard every Sunday morning wearing nothing but cutoffs and tube tops. Maybe then she'll finally appreciate you .
QFjoins-church-of-kayleamay

KTC
11-29-2010, 04:04 PM
QFjoins-church-of-kayleamay

You should remember to also wear flip flops if you're going to do that, though. Safety first.

poetinahat
11-29-2010, 04:12 PM
You should remember to also wear flip flops if you're going to do that, though. Safety first.

My thong thung blue.

Yep, that's all I got. It deserved a better line, sir. *wheeze*

Devil Ledbetter
11-29-2010, 05:59 PM
On the bright side, she'll probably never ask you again for a favor. And that's a blessing in disguise, since the last thing you most likely need is yet another person who expects you to be of service while she takes advantage of your good nature. This.

About two years ago my formerly nice next door neighbor decided she hates me, for no reason that I have been able to discern. It's really not a big deal having a neighbor hate you. I always give her a big, friendly hello anyway, just to be an annoying bint.

quickWit
11-29-2010, 06:08 PM
I've apologized over the phone, but I feel like I should do something else.

Any suggestions?

Stand out in the street in front of her house with a boom box blaring In Your Eyes.

Perks
11-29-2010, 06:37 PM
Well, the good news is, the package turned up! I still think she hates me, but I feel better now that I know nothing bad happened to her stuff.

It's just really strange to me that I smiled and agreed to it and never thought of it again. That is so not like me.

Anyway, I suppose all's well except for the being hated part.

cray
11-29-2010, 06:47 PM
it'll be ok, perks.






for the rest of us, the take away here is that perks will agree to just about anything when she's fresh outta the shower.

Perks
11-29-2010, 06:50 PM
for the rest of us, the take away here is that perks will agree to just about anything when she's fresh outta the shower.As long as it's not at odds with what the voices in my head is recommending.

KTC
11-29-2010, 06:58 PM
Perks, if you're not hated you're doing something wrong. one must be hated and loved.

scarletpeaches
11-29-2010, 07:00 PM
I'm just working on the hate for now. I like to do these things well.

cray
11-29-2010, 07:07 PM
me too (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showpost.php?p=5499305&postcount=995).

scarletpeaches
11-29-2010, 07:09 PM
I hate you. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byEGjLU2egA)

KTC
11-29-2010, 07:13 PM
i can feel the hate. jolly well done.

kayleamay
11-29-2010, 07:14 PM
I don't hate SP, because she would enjoy my hate. Therefore, I lurve her so that she will hate me for not hating her. This way, I can enjoy her hate instead her enjoying mine.

That will make sense if you read it twice.

scarletpeaches
11-29-2010, 07:15 PM
I actually got that.

Which is quite worrying.

Bmwhtly
11-29-2010, 07:19 PM
I actually got that.

Which is quite worrying.It's not worrying, it was as clear as fish piss.

KTC
11-29-2010, 07:34 PM
and a fish kiss too.

Perks
11-29-2010, 07:55 PM
Oh my god, you people are weird. What you were my neighbors?

Bmwhtly
11-29-2010, 07:58 PM
and a fish kiss too.:Huh:

Bmwhtly
11-29-2010, 07:59 PM
Oh my god, you people are weird. What if you were my neighbors?Well first, we'd teach you to spell Neighbours correctly :P

tiny
11-29-2010, 08:17 PM
This.

About two years ago my formerly nice next door neighbor decided she hates me, for no reason that I have been able to discern. It's really not a big deal having a neighbor hate you. I always give her a big, friendly hello anyway, just to be an annoying bint.


Odd. We had this happen to us. The neighbor who was constantly in our garage hanging out suddenly cut us dead. The only thing I can come up with that made him angry was I asked him to turn off a light on his back porch that shined directly into our bedroom all night. It's a 2 million watt bulb and it was giving me a sunburn while I was asleep.


Perk, don't worry. It'll pass or it won't. You said you were sorry and now it's on her. If she doesn't accept it, you can't change that.

quickWit
11-29-2010, 08:26 PM
Nothing says "I'm sorry" like a nice flaming bag of poop on her doorstep.

KTC
11-29-2010, 08:36 PM
:Huh:

mr brown can moo, can you?

KTC
11-29-2010, 08:36 PM
Nothing says "I'm sorry" like a nice flaming bag of poop on her doorstep.

OR a skinned rabbit in a crock pot!!

quickWit
11-29-2010, 08:41 PM
skinned rabbits generally don't say anything, just so yanno.

Perks
11-29-2010, 08:59 PM
You know, I'm starting to think I'm a pretty good neighbor... for a writer. When I make it big, gated community, here I come! You guys are flat out scary.

Snowstorm
11-29-2010, 09:02 PM
But we have cookies!

kayleamay
11-29-2010, 09:04 PM
You know, I'm starting to think I'm a pretty good neighbor... for a writer. When I make it big, gated community, here I come! You guys are flat out scary.


Can I visit if I promise to cover up the muffin top?

Perks
11-29-2010, 09:04 PM
I give the passcode to all cookoie-bearers.

Wait. I don't really like cookies. Have you got Bananas Foster?

KTC
11-29-2010, 09:07 PM
I give the passcode to all cookoie-bearers.

Wait. I don't really like cookies. Have you got Bananas Foster?

No. But I have a foster banana. His name is Everet. His parents left him at a bus shelter. I'm only fostering him for the money.

quickWit
11-29-2010, 09:10 PM
Can I visit if I promise to cover up the muffin top?

Oh, dear...


I don't really like cookies. Have you got Bananas Foster?

What is this, the pron thread? I don't know who this Foster is, but I should think one banana would be enough.
You ditzy broads should be ashamed.

Perks
11-29-2010, 09:11 PM
No. But I have a foster banana. His name is Everet. His parents left him at a bus shelter. I'm only fostering him for the money.

Jesus, you're weird.

And I'm having the best time saying that to all of you. I love you. Every one.

cray
11-29-2010, 09:36 PM
thread note: qw accepts packages from his neighbor.

quickWit
11-29-2010, 09:37 PM
thread note: qw accepts packages from his neighbor.

only really big ones.

Williebee
11-29-2010, 09:54 PM
further note: apparently QW knows that the neighbor has a really big package. hmmm.


So, Perks, mylove. Have you sent over the apology cake or pie yet? (You should probably send cookies instead, heck you're not gonna eat 'em.)

Perks
11-29-2010, 10:00 PM
So, Perks, mylove. Have you sent over the apology cake or pie yet? (You should probably send cookies instead, heck you're not gonna eat 'em.)I was totally thinking of doing this. I really feel that bad about it. It's just entirely unlike me. It's not that I'm so damned noble, it just never hurts to have people owe you a favor or two.

Is it evil that friendliness is ultimately self-serving?

Seriously though, I just generally do what I say I'm going to do. Occasionally I'm late or scatterbrained, but I don't simply never think of an obligation again once I've made it.

Maybe I have a tumor.

Devil Ledbetter
11-29-2010, 10:16 PM
No. But I have a foster banana. His name is Everet. His parents left him at a bus shelter. I'm only fostering him for the money.You had me at bananas foster.

Perks
11-29-2010, 10:20 PM
You had me at bananas foster.Liar. You loved me before that.

cray
11-29-2010, 10:26 PM
I was totally thinking of doing this. I really feel that bad about it. It's just entirely unlike me. It's not that I'm so damned noble, it just never hurts to have people owe you a favor or two.

Is it evil that friendliness is ultimately self-serving?

Seriously though, I just generally do what I say I'm going to do. Occasionally I'm late or scatterbrained, but I don't simply never think of an obligation again once I've made it.

Maybe I have a tumor.



just relax, perks. we all agree to things when we are nearly naked that we'd not agree to fully clothed.

*grabs mic*


test. test.....
is this thing on?.....

ahem. perks had just gotten out of the shower where mr. perks is now. she hears a knock at the door and without thinking of the robe around her being the only thing covering her she goes to answer the door.

at the door stands quickwit.

“yes, can i help you?” she asks.

“well”, replies qw, “i’ll give you $200 to drop that towel of yours!”

overwhelmed by the offer she blushes, but decides she could use the money so agrees to do it.

so she drops the towel slowly and quickwit just stands there looking at her perfect exposed body. he then gives her the money and walks off. “strange,” thought perks as she headed to the bedroom where her husband was now getting dressed.

“who was at the door?” he asked “just your friend qw.” she replied.




“well,” he said, “did he give you the $200 he owes me?!” :D



*stage dives*

Snowstorm
11-29-2010, 10:30 PM
Wait. I don't really like cookies. Have you got Bananas Foster?

Wow, great timing. I just read that yesterday and want to try it for a new breakfast. C'mon over!

quickWit
11-29-2010, 10:31 PM
perks had just gotten out of the shower where mr. perks is now. she hears a knock at the door and without thinking of the robe around her being the only thing covering her she goes to answer the door.

at the door stands quickwit.

“yes, can i help you?” she asks.

“well”, replies qw, “i’ll give you $200 to drop that towel of yours!”

overwhelmed by the offer she blushes, but decides she could use the money so agrees to do it.

so she drops the towel slowly and quickwit just stands there looking at her perfect exposed body. he then gives her the money and walks off. “strange,” thought perks as she headed to the bedroom where her husband was now getting dressed.

“who was at the door?” he asked “just your friend qw.” she replied.




“well,” he said, “did he give you the $200 he owes me?!” :D



*stage dives*
Seems kind of silly to ask Perks to drop her towel when she answered the door in a robe. I must not be very bright.

On another note, how 'bout them iggles?

Perks
11-29-2010, 10:32 PM
Hey, my robe is awesome. You guys would like looking at it.

cray
11-29-2010, 10:34 PM
Seems kind of silly to ask Perks to drop her towel when she answered the door in a robe. I must not be very bright.




i thought the idear that you were 'friends' with anybody was teh funny part! :roll:

can you imagine?






On another note, how 'bout them iggles?

:e2moon:

sassandgroove
11-29-2010, 11:21 PM
If she is wearing a robe, then the towel would be on her head and all QW would see when she removes the towel is her lovely hair. DUH.

KTC
11-29-2010, 11:23 PM
Jesus, you're weird.

Yes I am, my child. It is necessary to spread the word.

Regards,
Jesus

backslashbaby
11-29-2010, 11:52 PM
I was totally thinking of doing this. I really feel that bad about it. It's just entirely unlike me. It's not that I'm so damned noble, it just never hurts to have people owe you a favor or two.

Is it evil that friendliness is ultimately self-serving?

Seriously though, I just generally do what I say I'm going to do. Occasionally I'm late or scatterbrained, but I don't simply never think of an obligation again once I've made it.

Maybe I have a tumor.

You're so earthy and solid, I can see your dilemma! Bad Perks! bad, bad Perks! :) Ah, it's nothing a little Godiva won't fix. This is the South. They have cute small boxes all wrapped in gold. Less than 12 bucks, I think. Handwrite the apology note (Godiva has free tags). And say Dear.

Done.

Usually you'd bake something, but see the 'eat a stranger's food' thread. And it's not gold-wrapped. You can even give the $5 ones because of that wrapping they have, I swear :D

Perks
11-29-2010, 11:55 PM
You're so earthy and solid...Did you see that? Backslashbaby just called me dirty and fat. Yep. That's the South for you.

backslashbaby
11-30-2010, 12:05 AM
:ROFL:

If I meant that, I would've added a 'bless your heart'. Duh!

Mela
11-30-2010, 05:38 AM
So someone you're hardly friends with rings your doorbell, doesn't understand that you in your bathrobe out of the shower, could be somewhat distracted ... doesn't apologize and say, I'll come back at a better time - when you're clothed --- maybe neighbor could have thought to self, I should come back when it's more convenient or at least confirm our conversation before I leave.
And then neighbor gets pissed about the missing package?

Well, 2 things:

1. Neighbor should have sensed that a somewhat distracted person right out of the shower at her front door might not be fully in tuned with neighbor's needs when neighbor explains about the package and maybe it's neighbor's responsibility to come back at a better time - or get an email or phone number to confirm at another time.

2. Could also be that there would never have been a better time. In which case you're human. I've had people yell at me, thinking I have some sort of diabolical plot against them, when I've merely made an innocent and human mistake.

I think that a neighbor who has never bothered to make contact except for the one time in which she needs a favor can't be fretted over too much.

My opinion. For what it's worth.

mccardey
11-30-2010, 05:45 AM
further note: apparently QW knows that the neighbor has a really big package. hmmm.


So, Perks, mylove. Have you sent over the apology cake or pie yet? (You should probably send cookies instead, heck you're not gonna eat 'em.)

Willi - Perks has totally ruined this poor woman's life. As in actually ruined. (Sorry, Perks, not trying to make you feel worse, but - you know - ruined!) On top of which, any pathetic sense of neighbourliness that that sad little community has desperately been trying to cobble together in this disastrous post-wikileaks world is, well - gone. Forever.

I'm thinking it's going to take cake and cookies. May even pie as well.... Because otherwise there's no way she - and god love them, the community - gets over this....

Cake. Cookies. Pie. (not sure about the banana...)

Kate Thornton
11-30-2010, 06:38 AM
Banana cake.
Banana pie.
That vanilla wafers and pudding and bananas thingy in a bowl.
Get Foster from down the street to deliver it. He's a neighbor too.

See - everything works out.



.

fwc
11-30-2010, 06:50 AM
That is Andy Warhol. Anyone on planet earth should know that.

I feel obtuse

KTC
11-30-2010, 02:21 PM
I feel obtuse

I feel equilateral.

fwc
11-30-2010, 04:55 PM
I feel equilateral.
Touché

KTC
11-30-2010, 08:44 PM
Touché

no! you're a douche! oh wait...you said touche. never mind.

mirandashell
11-30-2010, 10:53 PM
That is Andy Warhol. Anyone on planet earth should know that.


If only for 15 minutes......








Sorry