View Full Version : Need Someone to tear my UF manuscript apart

11-12-2010, 03:55 AM
Hi all. I need a beta reader to tear apart my completed UF manuscript. I am looking for a very thorough critique of everything from plot holes, to character development, to grammar. I just want to make sure its as polished as possible before I start querying.

The manuscript is a little short of 70,000 words. (I'd like to beef the word count if its appropriate)

Here's the blurb:

A simple insurance employee by day, assistant mercenary at night, Alex Grey has a long list of enemies. So when a head lands on her desk with a card signed V., she has no idea where to start. With the help of good looking billionaire, Derek Kaye, she discovers that V. is a demon named Victoria and Victoria wants her head on a silver platter for killing her sister. Throw in the fact that her company is in the middle of audits with a soul-sucking demon auditor, killing her co-workers; Alex has more than a full plate on her hands.

Thanks in advance.

11-24-2010, 08:09 AM
I also need a beta to tear my manuscript apart before querying. I've made some recent changes, and want to make sure they enhance the story, rather than hinder.

My MS is a YA Fantasy of 75,000 words about a teenage girl who travels to another Realm to record the history there. That's it in a nutshell, much more complex in real life. I have the query in the "share" section - POINT OF OBLIVION.

Send me a PM if you're interested in swapping stories.

11-24-2010, 10:56 PM
Hi Ashley. I'm an executive assistant by day in an insurance and investment firm. I could at least find anything about the business that might be out of order. Hope to offer you a good read about the rest as well. PM me and I'll take a look.