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Eudoxia
11-10-2010, 01:29 AM
Example: "Just imagine everyone's naked."
Yeah, cause that isn't creepy at all. >_> <_<

Anyone else been told advice that believe it's creepy,weird, or just down right dumb?

cray
11-10-2010, 01:33 AM
if i hear 'my eyes are up here!' one more time.....



gah!

dclary
11-10-2010, 01:34 AM
My father went in to see the doctor for a migraine, who told him "Ok, so let's see if this is something we can put medicine on, or if we just need to amputate."

Cella
11-10-2010, 01:50 AM
No means no.















kidding!

BenPanced
11-10-2010, 01:58 AM
Sit down and shut up.

RaineeRose
11-10-2010, 02:09 AM
Keep your hands to yourself.

L.J.
11-10-2010, 02:25 AM
My father went in to see the doctor for a migraine, who told him "Ok, so let's see if this is something we can put medicine on, or if we just need to amputate."

When my friend and I were about 18, he got bitten by a dog. He told the doctor, 'I don't think I need stitches.' The doctor said, 'Oh, don't worry, we don't do stitches. We amputate.' Was it the same doctor? lol

L.J.
11-10-2010, 02:27 AM
How about when you tell the doctor, 'it hurts when I do this', and the doctor says, 'Well, don't do that.' =)

Duchessmary
11-10-2010, 02:27 AM
Don't do that you'll poke you're eye out!

Button
11-10-2010, 02:29 AM
You'll go blind.

kayleamay
11-10-2010, 02:35 AM
*buys t-shirt with eyeballs on the front, imagines everyone naked, smiles*

What's the name of this thread again?

Leah J. Utas
11-10-2010, 02:37 AM
If you go you'll wish you hadn't. If you stay home, you'll wish you'd gone.

This is actual advice. I heard it many times.

L.J.
11-10-2010, 02:40 AM
'If you're ever by the river, drop in.' Of course, I guess that's more of an invitation than advice, lol.

Ken
11-10-2010, 02:42 AM
... forks on the left, spoons on the right. Can never remember which. So the advice is bad because I always feel foolish no matter which way I lay them out, thinking I did it wrong. Not that it really matters, but still ....

Eudoxia
11-10-2010, 05:40 AM
He won't be a stranger once you get in his van!

Gugland
11-10-2010, 06:10 AM
"You gotta be smarter than the table"

Example: Me, as a kid, rushing thru the living room. I bump into the table, turn around, kick it and curse at it. Then my dad would say "well son, you gotta be smarter than the table"

Thanks dad, real confidence-builder there.

kayleamay
11-10-2010, 07:13 AM
"Don't sell those Doomed.com stocks yet. It's just a little dip. Hold out for a couple of year and you'll triple your money. "

Advice from my now unemployed investment advisor in 2001. Jackass.

(Company name changed to to protect the innocent and salvage what's left of my dignity.)

Cella
11-10-2010, 07:17 AM
"You gotta be smarter than the table"

Example: Me, as a kid, rushing thru the living room. I bump into the table, turn around, kick it and curse at it. Then my dad would say "well son, you gotta be smarter than the table"

Thanks dad, real confidence-builder there.
:ROFL:


ha ha ha!!!

Wicked
11-10-2010, 07:35 AM
"Let's take a shortcut."

Words I regularly said to my friends in my youth. Usually right before leading us straight into trouble.

thothguard51
11-10-2010, 08:02 AM
GW to DC, "Is waterboarding really legal?"

"Yes junior, because you are going to sign an executive order making it legal."

"I can do that?"

Truth and Fiction
11-10-2010, 08:02 PM
"Can't you add some war scenes or something?"

--Advice from a new writer/critiquer for my literary short story about mother/daughter relationships.

gracemichael
11-10-2010, 08:54 PM
"Taste it, you'll like it!"

Grrarrgh
11-10-2010, 09:10 PM
"It's an acquired taste."

If I don't like it, why would I want to eat or drink enough of it to acquire a taste for it?

ETA: I hear this a lot because I can't stand beer. Beer, people. Get your heads out of the gutter.

Ooohh.. that's another one. "Get your head out of the gutter."

shadowwalker
11-10-2010, 10:16 PM
"Better safe than sorry."

And I typically ended up safe and sorry...

cynicalpirate
11-11-2010, 01:20 AM
Ill advice for a multiple choice test:
"When in doubt, circle in C."

Took me four years of high school and one year in College to figure out that this one didn't work exactly 99.9% of the time. :P

Eudoxia
11-11-2010, 03:29 AM
"If you think big, you'll make it big."

Is it just me, or does that sort of sound perverted?

BenPanced
11-11-2010, 10:07 AM
"Oh, it's okay to click that link! Especially when you're at work!"

LaceWing
11-11-2010, 01:55 PM
"Do as I say, not as I do."

Somehow that didn't quite work, Mom.