View Full Version : Seeking beta: scifi novella, second try

10-04-2010, 05:52 AM
I've never done an elevator pitch, but here goes (feel free to critique this too):

The Jupiter frontier. Just this side of tamed. Lena, a hacker under the thumb of a powerful agency, is stuck with delivering a dangerous package. She manages that but then the chuck who gave her a lift to the drop-off goes and steals it for himself. Next thing she knows she's stuck with the chuck, Shen, on his damaged ship as they're hurtling into deep space with not enough brakes. And then the package turns out to have a say in all this.

52.5k words. Moderately hard science fiction. Fair amount of language, a little nudity, some violence... let's call it a soft R rating.

This story has been around for a long time and it's been through several incarnations so I'm worried about internal loose ends, lapses in narrative voice, and how well the ending works. All criticisms are welcome.

If you'd like to swap crits, I read science fiction and fantasy (not YA, not urban fantasy, not romance, sorry). And nonfiction.

Thanks for looking.