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ManyAk
10-01-2010, 06:14 PM
I need some help.

In my current WIP, my MC struggles with the pain that a broken relationship brings. I don't want to give away much here, but let's just say that during the climax of the story, she confronts that pain which has manifested itself physically (bare with me).

So what would be an original way for her to beat that pain? How do people usually get over that sadness in order to be able to move on in life?

It's a pretty difficult question as far as I'm concerned, because honestly I didn't have that much relationships in the first place. I hope you guys will understand what I'm looking.

Thanks a bunch.

CaroGirl
10-01-2010, 06:21 PM
I would say that depends on what you mean by "a broken relationship." I mean how a relationship ends is more important than the fact that it ended. Did one person die or have an affair? Who left whom, and why? Are there children? Was the relationship sexual; same sex or opposite sex? How old are the participants? How many relationships have each had prior to this one? There are too many variables to answer your question properly. Personality also makes a difference.

Some people plunge into another relationship right away, which turns out to be a mistake; some people drink or do drugs to kill the pain; some throw themselves into their job; some buy a puppy.

ManyAk
10-01-2010, 06:34 PM
The situation I find myself in is a bit more surreal than what happens in real life.

Their relationship ended. She is in pain. Through a certain process, she confronts that pain (which comes from the broken relationship) directly. Her inner pain takes a physical manifestation, and she has to beat it, in order to cope with the same pain, but on an emotional level this time.

It's a very concrete and litteral confrontation between her and the pain/demon/enemy/antagonist call it what you want.

wheelwriter
10-01-2010, 07:28 PM
Sounds like an interesting idea. Off the top of my head:

Ice cream. It sounds odd, but ice cream has scientifically (as long as you use no science) been proven to help with break ups. If this story has a lightness about it, brain freeze/lactose intolerence could play a part. If this is more serious/suspenseful, then ignore that crazy suggestion. Chocolate works too.

Talking to people. She may think she needs to slay this beastly manifestation, but really she just needs to talk everything through. She could see a therapist and the beast gets weaker as she gets stronger.

Same goes for time, which is really often the best "cure" for a broken heart. As time goes on the beast could naturally become weaker. She just has to live through it.

Listening to music helps me, so music could act like some sort of weapon.

Crying. Tears could be like poison.

ManyAk
10-01-2010, 07:37 PM
You've been really helpful Wheelwriter, thanks!

And by the way, I find the ice cream idea fantastic! Unfortunately, I'm looking for something more serious like you said.

frolzagain
10-01-2010, 08:01 PM
A lot of it depends on the person. Some people shut themsleves off from the world to deal with their grief or sorrow. Others indulge in self-destructive behavior like excessive drinking, gambling, over eating ect. I've also heard stories about people burning or destroying anything that reminds them of the peson they are trying to get over. It moslty depends on how your MC deals with stress. If they are angry, or depressive or whatever- those characteristics are going to be amplified during a heartache.

cate townsend
10-01-2010, 10:32 PM
I think you're going to have to ask your character. I know that sounds odd, but it depends on what type of person they are. If you truly know them, then you will know how they deal with this. Sometimes just sitting down at the keyboard helps bring out actions/reactions that you may not have explored before. I don't think anyone can tell you how this character would act without knowing what their story is, who they are, what their past is all about, and what issues they currently face. And then, some people act totally unexpected in certain situations. Good luck.

Giant Baby
10-01-2010, 11:13 PM
If she's troubled, you could explore things like cutting, burning the skin with matches or cigarettes, breaking/punching glass, screaming for long periods on end. Your character would likely already have some symptoms of self-injurious behaviors during times of anxiety or depression, unless she's quite young (teens, likely), in which this could conceivably be the first time it's come up.

Tiger
10-01-2010, 11:16 PM
Martial arts. And, Archery. Running through those katas made a good exercise in slaying demons.

heza
10-02-2010, 12:08 AM
Hard to say without knowing how/where specifically she confronts her pain. But you might look at the 5 stages of grief (why do some sites say 7?) and try to transform each stage into an activity/challenge/test that your protag has to complete/overcome/pass to move to the next stage, working toward acceptance where her pain fades away.

Rowan
10-02-2010, 01:03 AM
Hhhmmm, I'd have to say if her pain has manifested itself as some sort of demon she has to get at the root of her pain and destroy it. She might do this by accepting the breakup wasn't her fault or coming to the realization she's a better person because the relationship ended. It's kind of like confronting fear. Let's say you're afraid of heights---so you decide to jump out of an airplane (face those fears and beat them into submission).

Is she spiritual? Maybe she consults a "spiritual advisor", even a shaman (vision quest) or a witch, who uses a spell/ritual to cast the pain/demon out. Or a hypnotist--she confronts the pain on a subconscious level. Or heck, a dream therapist and you could have her confront this pain manifestation in a guided dream.

She can't let this pain control her life. That's her first step..... :)

Shakesbear
10-02-2010, 01:07 AM
I moved. The stress of finding a house I liked, sorting all the finances and the actual move made the break up of my relationship pale into insignificance. The joy of waking up in a new place and knowing that he did not know where I was was splendid.

ManyAk
10-02-2010, 03:55 AM
Hhhmmm, I'd have to say if her pain has manifested itself as some sort of demon she has to get at the root of her pain and destroy it. She might do this by accepting the breakup wasn't her fault or coming to the realization she's a better person because the relationship ended. It's kind of like confronting fear. Let's say you're afraid of heights---so you decide to jump out of an airplane (face those fears and beat them into submission).

Is she spiritual? Maybe she consults a "spiritual advisor", even a shaman (vision quest) or a witch, who uses a spell/ritual to cast the pain/demon out. Or a hypnotist--she confronts the pain on a subconscious level. Or heck, a dream therapist and you could have her confront this pain manifestation in a guided dream.

She can't let this pain control her life. That's her first step..... :)

You clever dog. That's already what happens in my story! Your suggestions are great, thanks a lot!

This definitely got me going. Help has been much appreciated.

Rowan
10-02-2010, 04:35 AM
You clever dog. That's already what happens in my story! Your suggestions are great, thanks a lot!

This definitely got me going. Help has been much appreciated.

:yessmiley I can read minds. And great minds must think alike (but your avi is creeping me out! ;) )

Frye
10-02-2010, 05:07 AM
I'd have to say if her pain has manifested itself as some sort of demon she has to get at the root of her pain and destroy it ... She can't let this pain control her life. That's her first step..... :)

I must agree.

I flew to Florida and lounged on the beaches and docks reading "The Sun Also Rises" for two weeks. Since I lost the girl quite suddenly to a guy with attributes like Hemingway's bullfighter, the ending struck a chord and led to an epiphany of sorts.

I can't see your protag overcoming a physical demon with a copy of a literary classic - however, perhaps the solution is a metaphore or simile, just as a corporeal manifestation of emotional pain must be ...