"Only" a _____

ONLY a housewife. BWAHAHAHAHAHA! My husband makes all the money, works 9 hour days, and still admits I have the tougher job by far.

I doubt it has anything to do with how people perceive writers; it's how they perceive SAHMs. If she had worked anywhere at all, that woman in your knitting would probably not have made a similar comment. Next time you meet, how about coming armed with a list of SAHM/writers? J.K. Rowling, for instance.

"Only a housewife" sounds like a defensive response, in that scenario, because you stated you didn't care for it. The alternative is that it's dismissive. Neither are a great basis for substantive discussion, but I'm just a girl. What do I know?

It has a fair amount to do with culturally ingrained snobbery, and - not to be more strident than I usually am, but frankly - gender.

I myself am a secretary. That's the word I choose to use, though other people find it 'demeaning'. I say that secretary is an office which has been around for over half a millennium, and the word wasn't ruined until the past two generations, when jokes about lecherous bosses and brainless twinkies in heels became synonymous. Me, I find Administrative Assistant a fairly weak substitute, but at the end of the day I really don't care about my title. Give me my projects, I will manage them (that's really what it is, but I don't feel any need to be called a PM either), shut up and pay me.

My new title is Senior Administration Specialist, which simultaneously pleases and cracks me so completely up. I mean, wow, someone felt defensive, no?

People almost invariably marvel that I am "okay" with "just" being a secretary. I had to explain to my previous boss, so horrified when our company laid me off that he was forwarding listings for Other Positions I Could Aspire To, that honey, I'm an admin, that's no accident, I've been at it 25 years, and thank you so much but that's not second best - and NOT AN ACCIDENT. It's not because I never knew I could "do better" and it's a decision, not incidentally, made by that very same intelligence he was praising so fulsomely.

Not every company is like my previous employer, entirely unaware that a person can simultaneously be intelligent AND an Admin. Good grief, I'm even ambitious, though where it came from I can hardly tell you.


***


Um, what were we talking about ... ?



Anyway. Yeah. I know the "only a" whatever game. Go suck an egg, snobby people. The rest of us'll be just fine without your "helpful" input.

Sheesh.

She's just a housewife,

He's just a bartender,

She's just a waitress,

He's just a plumber...

None of that has to do with writing ability.

I agree, its a defensive mechanism employed to make the person saying what ever, feel better about there own short comings...

Only a housewife? That particular housewife has more of a formal education than I do. I believe her degree is in creative writing, isn't it? I know she at least took a lot of creative writing classes in college.

JoNightshade said:

ONLY a housewife. BWAHAHAHAHAHA! My husband makes all the money, works 9 hour days, and still admits I have the tougher job by far.

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Can we swap husbands? LOL

And to answer the question. Nope, doesn't change how I feel about the writer if I know what they do for a living or anything really about their personal life. If their writing is good, I'll like it.

I do agree, am not a SM fan. At. All.

Otterella said:

At my knitting group the other day, the conversation turned to Twilight. Whatever your opinions on the writing, nobody can deny the raging success of it. I haven't read more than the first few paragraphs, but IMO, it was some of the worst writing I've ever read in a published novel. When I stated this opinion, one of my friends said "Well, she's only a housewife."

WTF?? Excuse me?? I am "only" a housewife, but I like to think I'm an above average writer. I may be wrong about that, but I did manage to get myself a BA in Creative Writing. The fact that I chose to stay home to raise my children has no bearing on my writing ability, for better or worse.

My quespltion is this: do other people feel this way? If someone is "only" a ______, does that change how you see them as a writer? Housewife, lawyer, factory worker, pearl diver, whatever. If we haven't chosen a path of scraping by while trying to live solely by the pen, are we viewed as lesser writers? (I'm not knocking that choice either. It just wasn't the choice I made for myself.) I would like to think my writing, good or bad, speaks for itself.

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Never. Nobody is ever "only a______," but they are always a human being. Makes me upset when people choose to categorize people--it's like putting people on a box.

Writing is just something a writer does, it is not who they are.

As for Twilight, I've never read them, because I understand they are fantasy, which I don't read a whole lot of. Being so successful, how can they be the worst writing you have ever read? I mean, maybe you don't like the books for whatever reason, but I can't see them being horrible. How can horrible books sell so well?

em i think the term 'knitting group'...em, well

Otterella said:

At my knitting group the other day, the conversation turned to Twilight. Whatever your opinions on the writing, nobody can deny the raging success of it. I haven't read more than the first few paragraphs, but IMO, it was some of the worst writing I've ever read in a published novel. When I stated this opinion, one of my friends said "Well, she's only a housewife."

WTF?? Excuse me?? I am "only" a housewife, but I like to think I'm an above average writer. I may be wrong about that, but I did manage to get myself a BA in Creative Writing. The fact that I chose to stay home to raise my children has no bearing on my writing ability, for better or worse.

My quespltion is this: do other people feel this way? If someone is "only" a ______, does that change how you see them as a writer? Housewife, lawyer, factory worker, pearl diver, whatever. If we haven't chosen a path of scraping by while trying to live solely by the pen, are we viewed as lesser writers? (I'm not knocking that choice either. It just wasn't the choice I made for myself.) I would like to think my writing, good or bad, speaks for itself.

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And she's still your friend?

But Meyers isn't "only" a housewife, she's also one of the bestselling writers on the planet. She's sold more than 100 million copies, and her books have been made into feature films, and translated into thirty-seven languages. She has a B.A. in English from Brigham Young University, and was ranked #49 on Time Magazine's list of the "100 Most Influential People in 2008.

You might ask your friend where she ranks.

Now, I don't think the writing in Twilight is great, but it's hardly the worst I've read in any published novel. Far from it, in fact. It's not great, but it isn't nearly as bad as many claim. And it's certainly far better that 99% of what I see in slush piles.

I read the book cover to cover, and while the writing ranges from competent to not bad at all, something very few who try manage, I think the story and characters are wonderful, and as the sales numbers show, that's really what matters. Story and character trump "good" writing every last time.

I don't know many people in any profession who can write a bestselling novel, let alone land at number 49 on Time's list at the ripe old age of thirty-five.

I do wonder if your friend knows Meyers has a B.A. in English from a major university? Or that Ernest Hemingway, perhaps the most influential writer of teh 20th century, never went to college at all?

I suppose I'd also ask your friend what kind of degree she has, and how much money she makes each year. I guarantee it's not as much as Meyer earns.

It's how good you are, and nothing else. Stephanie Meyer is a writer. This is her profession, and she's incredibly successful. She's a writer who came into the profession while being a housewife. That's it.

Jamesaritchie said:

It's how good you are, and nothing else. Stephanie Meyer is a writer. This is her profession, and she's incredibly successful. She's a writer who came into the profession while being a housewife. That's it.

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Cha-ching!
Jackpot of the year. That's all there is to the "only a".

Maybe it has something to do with the mental image of a middel-aged, bored housewife, typing some stuff as a hobby, like quilting. The idea they a houswife is not really commited to writing and just writes because she has nothing better to do, now that the kids are mostley taking care of themselfs.
I don't agree with this, but can I see where it comes from.
Truth is, I do imagine S.Meyer as one of these kind of housewifes. Her writing is so bad that it seems like she never put any effort in learning the craft. Like she just sat down started writing, because she thought it might be fun.

maggi90w1 said:

The idea they a houswife is not really commited to writing and just writes because she has nothing better to do, now that the kids are mostley taking care of themselfs.
I don't agree with this, but can I see where it comes from.
Truth is, I do imagine S.Meyer as one of these kind of housewifes. Her writing is so bad that it seems like she never put any effort in learning the craft. Like she just sat down started writing, because she thought it might be fun.

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Wow.

Yes, it's quite appalling that Meyer thought writing might be fun and actually sat down to write. That's quite a horrifying concept.

And, because she's clearly a bored housewife clearly not committed to writing--or the craft thereof--it's just super lucky that she hit it right out of the ballpark on the first go.

We should call someone about such a literary travesty taking place.

Paul said:

em i think the term 'knitting group'...em, well

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Hey, man. Don't mess with people who play with pointy sticks as a hobby. Two eyes, two sticks... you seeing where this is going? LOL.

In all seriousness though, eyeroll - from what I hear, Meyer IS quite educated (as Libbie stated). But no, it doesn't change my view of them one jot what they choose to do.

What more do I need to know, other than that they are a WRITER?

And all comments of Meyer's work aside, I don't understand why everyone beats up on her. I like her work for what it is, not hate it for what it isn't

aadams73 said:

Yes, it's quite appalling that Meyer thought writing might be fun and actually sat down to write. That's quite a horrifying concept.

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While the post you're criticizing was poorly worded, I think the point is that Meyer's work comes off as indulgent, hackneyed, and unsophisticated, and doesn't take the art of storytelling (let alone prose) seriously. Her books are about a cipher Mary Sue and a love interest incessantly described as "perfect." This bespeaks amateurism.

It's great that Meyer had fun writing. And it's great that lots of people have fun reading what she wrote. But that doesn't mean her work is above criticism.

Leah Raeder said:

While the post you're criticizing was poorly worded, I think the point is that Meyer's work comes off as indulgent, hackneyed, and unsophisticated, and doesn't take the art of storytelling (let alone prose) seriously. Her books are about a cipher Mary Sue and a love interest incessantly described as "perfect." This bespeaks amateurism.

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Be that as it may (and I completely agree about her characters), I'm sure writing Twilight was quite serious to her. And while her prose lacks a certain finesse, it's far from the worst I've seen.

But that doesn't mean her work is above criticism.

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Of course it's not. But in this instance, she's being attacked for her motivations for writing, which is just ridiculous. The assumption that she was this bored housewife who didn't give a damn about the craft of writing is just rude and, very likely, unfounded.

If people want to get into some kind of intelligent discussion about how her writing and storytelling is weak, great. They should. Bring examples. Let's all learn something out of it. But turning yet another thread into a case of, "OMG, Stephanie Meyer SUX," is boring, repetitive, and ridiculous.

Criticize the work all you like, but don't assume her writing isn't serious (and personal) to her. She wrote the story she wanted to write, and as a result she scored big.

Good for her.

MissMacchiato said:

Hey, man. Don't mess with people who play with pointy sticks as a hobby.

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heh. you beat me to it.

in fact, if someone had made the 'only a housewife' comment to me, i would have probably done something really inappropriate with the aforementioned pointy sticks.

High five to that!
Love this tshirt:



lol!

Libbie said:

Only a housewife? That particular housewife has more of a formal education than I do. I believe her degree is in creative writing, isn't it? I know she at least took a lot of creative writing classes in college.

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Yeah, and they were wasted.

MissMacchiato said:

High five to that!
Love this tshirt:

lol!

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Love it! I want one

Of course it's not. But in this instance, she's being attacked for her motivations for writing, which is just ridiculous

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I wasn't criticizing her motivation but her approach. I think her books would have been much better if she would have taken some time to work on basic skills like plotting and character-development.
I'm sure there are thousands of housewife who take their time to develop their writing skills and put a lot of effort into mastering the craft, but I don't think Meyer was one of them.

Otterella said:

At my knitting group the other day, the conversation turned to Twilight. Whatever your opinions on the writing, nobody can deny the raging success of it. I haven't read more than the first few paragraphs, but IMO, it was some of the worst writing I've ever read in a published novel. When I stated this opinion, one of my friends said "Well, she's only a housewife."

WTF?? Excuse me?? I am "only" a housewife, but I like to think I'm an above average writer. I may be wrong about that, but I did manage to get myself a BA in Creative Writing. The fact that I chose to stay home to raise my children has no bearing on my writing ability, for better or worse.

My quespltion is this: do other people feel this way? If someone is "only" a ______, does that change how you see them as a writer? Housewife, lawyer, factory worker, pearl diver, whatever. If we haven't chosen a path of scraping by while trying to live solely by the pen, are we viewed as lesser writers? (I'm not knocking that choice either. It just wasn't the choice I made for myself.) I would like to think my writing, good or bad, speaks for itself.

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I'd have head-butted him (her?), to be honest.

aadams73 said:

Be that as it may (and I completely agree about her characters), I'm sure writing Twilight was quite serious to her. And while her prose lacks a certain finesse, it's far from the worst I've seen.

..... she's being attacked for her motivations for writing, which is just ridiculous. The assumption that she was this bored housewife who didn't give a damn about the craft of writing is just rude and, very likely, unfounded.

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I agree.

Regardless of how she writes, we can't tear apart her motivation for writing or how seriously she may or may not have taken it.

I assumed "Twilight" is YA. Lots of older people may have read it, but it is their own fault if they read below their grade level. I always thought YA reading stopped at about 16 or so. It does not encourage the development of a vocabulary, or the expectations of more advanced themes or styles. Those people who read it well into their 20's do not really understand there is another level of reading.