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View Full Version : Do ever wonder...



kayleamay
07-22-2010, 09:34 PM
...if it's possible that all of the users on AW are actually just a couple of people with a thousand different usernames? Or, if maybe you're the only one who doesn't know that this site is actually an experiment in robotic responses to human interaction?

Random thought. I think I might be tired.

robeiae
07-22-2010, 09:35 PM
I think I've advanced this theory before. Clearly, you're one of my sock puppets.

kayleamay
07-22-2010, 09:35 PM
Is that why I'm sticky?

Cella
07-22-2010, 09:36 PM
does who ever wonder?

kayleamay
07-22-2010, 09:37 PM
You. No, wait. I mean me. Do I ever wonder...


Crap. Now I'm confused.

Wayne K
07-22-2010, 09:39 PM
We are borg

Cella
07-22-2010, 09:39 PM
well i don't. just so we're clear....

kayleamay
07-22-2010, 09:41 PM
But you're not real, which leaves us right where we started.


Do you ever wonder if Wayne is real? I mean, do I?

robeiae
07-22-2010, 09:42 PM
well i don't. just so we're clear....
Yes you do...

kayleamay
07-22-2010, 09:43 PM
Yes you do...

We thought so.

Wayne K
07-22-2010, 09:44 PM
We are not amused

Cella
07-22-2010, 09:47 PM
give us a kiss.

kayleamay
07-22-2010, 09:48 PM
Would that be considered self-love?

robeiae
07-22-2010, 09:49 PM
We are not amused

You look like the piss-boy!

Wayne K
07-22-2010, 09:50 PM
No. We do

kayleamay
07-22-2010, 09:54 PM
Ugh, I knew it.


This is why I have nightmares.

maxmordon
07-22-2010, 10:00 PM
"Dear sir, poor sir, brave sir: You are an experiment by the Creator of the Universe. You are the only creature in the entire Universe who has free will. You are the only one who has to figure out what to do next--and why. Everybody else is a robot, a machine.
"Some persons seem to like you, and others seem to hate you, and you must wonder why. They are simply liking machines and hating machines.
"You are pooped and demoralized. Why wouldn't you be? Of course it's exhausting, having to reason every time in a universe which wasn't meant to be reasonable.
"You are surrounded by loving machines, hating machines, greedy machines, unselfish machines, brave machines, cowardly machines, truthful machines, lying machines, funny machines, solemn machines. Their only purpose is to stir you up in every conceivable way, so the Creator of the Universe can watch your reactions. They can no more feel or reason than grandfather clocks.
"The Creator of the Universe would now like to apologize not only for the capricious, jostling companionship he provided during the test, but for the trashy, stinking condition of the planet itself. The Creator programmed robots to abuse it for millions of years, so it would be a poisonous, festering cheese when you got here. Also, He made sure it would be desperately crowded by programming robots, regardless of their living conditions, to crave sexual intercourse and adore infants more than almost anything.
"He also programmed robots to write books and magazines and newspapers for you, and television and radio shows, and stage shows, and films. They wrote songs for you. The Creator of the Universe had them invent hundreds of religions, so you would have plenty to choose among. He had them kill each other by the millions, for this purpose only: that you be amazed. They had commited every possible atrocity and every possible kindness unfeelingly, automatically, inevitably, to get a reaction from Y-O-U."
This last word was set in extra-large type and had a line all to itself, so it looked like this:
Y - O - U"Every time you went into the library, the Creator of the Universe held His breath. With such a higgledy-piggledy cultural smorgasbord before you, what would you, with your free will, choose?
"Your parents were fighting machines and self-pitying machines. Your mother was programmed to bawl out your father for being a defective money-making machine, and your father was programmed to bawl her out for being a defective housekeeping machine. They were programmed to bawl each other out for being defective loving machines.
"Then your father was programmed to stomp out of the house and slam the door. This automatically turned your mother into a weeping machine. And your father would go down to a tavern where he would get drunk with some other drinking machines. Then all the drinking machines would go to a whorehouse and rent fucking machines. And then your father would drag himself home to become an apologizing machine. And your mother would become a very slow forgiving machine."

quickWit
07-22-2010, 10:00 PM
You look like the piss-boy!

and you look like a bucket of shit!

robeiae
07-22-2010, 10:04 PM
Bernaise? Do you have any of those delicious raisins left?

kayleamay
07-22-2010, 10:05 PM
:cry:

quickWit
07-22-2010, 10:08 PM
Bernaise? Do you have any of those delicious raisins left?

you ate yours, these are mine.

robeiae
07-22-2010, 10:09 PM
Ahh, but the servant waits, while the master baits!

Wayne K
07-22-2010, 10:11 PM
Dear Mr. Vernon, We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. What we did *was* wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. What do you care? You see us as you want to see us - in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. You see us as a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess and a criminal. Correct? That's the way we saw each other at 7:00 this morning. We were brainwashed.

quickWit
07-22-2010, 10:13 PM
It's said that the peasants are revolting.

robeiae
07-22-2010, 10:15 PM
Nice. Not thrilling, but nice.

shyne
07-22-2010, 10:30 PM
Show us our boobs

regdog
07-22-2010, 10:37 PM
Bernaise? Do you have any of those delicious raisins left?


you ate yours, these are mine.

You do know since Qwitter is supplying the raisins, they're not really raisins, right.