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View Full Version : is it totally rude to submit with my maiden name?



defyalllogic
06-04-2010, 10:34 PM
i want to get my publishing credit as ME. I dunno, I want MY name, not my new married wifey name, (just married on May 1st).

i just feel possessive still about submitting as the original me.maybe because i come from a small family and there aren't any more of us coming (only girls in our line).

he comes from a big family and they all so attached to the last name....

Is it awful to want to get a pro credit as the original rather than the new and improved?

Shadow_Ferret
06-04-2010, 10:36 PM
No. Why would it be rude. Many writers use pseudonyms (although in your case, it really wouldn't be a pseudonym) and I know many professional women who work under their maiden names.

scarletpeaches
06-04-2010, 10:38 PM
Buggered if I know why any woman would take her husband's surname anyway.

So what if his family are attached to their name - don't they think you might be attached to yours?

I wouldn't think of subbing as anything other than my real name. New and improved be damned; this is the name I was born with. It's the name I'll die with, too.

(Yes; I know I publish under a pseudonym - I'm referring to contracts and financial paperwork. All of that is under my birth name. I'm not married, but even if I were, that name would. Not. Change).

backslashbaby
06-04-2010, 10:39 PM
The name you knew all your life that is natural to associate with your identity? I wouldn't say rude at all :)

Cyia
06-04-2010, 10:41 PM
Why would it be rude?

Cranky
06-04-2010, 10:43 PM
Rude? To whom? Your husband?

CACTUSWENDY
06-04-2010, 10:44 PM
But SP, she is talking about being published under her maiden name, not a pen name.

I would say you can publish under what ever name you want, short of someone that is already published, as long as you get the checks for the money in the name that you can cash. ;)

If I were to become published, I have thought of using my maiden name.

scarletpeaches
06-04-2010, 10:49 PM
But SP, she is talking about being published under her maiden name, not a pen name.I know.

I'm still mystified as to why it would be rude for a woman to publish under her own name.

CheyElizabeth
06-04-2010, 10:51 PM
Hale no it's not rude.

I'm using my maiden name too. Mostly because I started writing way before getting married, (in fact I'm not quite married yet). If I had been married for a decade THEN started writing, maybe I'd use the married name..

Shadow_Ferret
06-04-2010, 10:51 PM
I know.

I'm still mystified as to why it would be rude for a woman to publish under her own name.Because it's not her own name any more. It's her maiden name. She took on the man's vastly superior name.

*grins, then runs off before she kicks his ass*

scarletpeaches
06-04-2010, 10:52 PM
Die in a fire.

Perks
06-04-2010, 10:58 PM
I used my maiden name. My married name is really kinda blech-sounding. My husband doesn't care. I was thinking it, but he was the first to say it.

jennontheisland
06-04-2010, 11:00 PM
It's your work, you can submit it under any name you want.

CaroGirl
06-04-2010, 11:01 PM
Buggered if I know why any woman would take her husband's surname anyway.

So what if his family are attached to their name - don't they think you might be attached to yours?

I wouldn't think of subbing as anything other than my real name. New and improved be damned; this is the name I was born with. It's the name I'll die with, too.

(Yes; I know I publish under a pseudonym - I'm referring to contracts and financial paperwork. All of that is under my birth name. I'm not married, but even if I were, that name would. Not. Change).
You must have a quite nice last name. I grew up with a horrible, hellish, ridiculous, and stupid last name. The teasing about it was relentless. I couldn't change it fast enough after I got married.

Unfortunately, though my husband's name is better, it's only marginally so.

To the OP, of course it isn't rude to want to be published using your maiden name. It's a choice that's yours to make.

defyalllogic
06-04-2010, 11:01 PM
you all make valid points. i needed reassurance i think.

why would it be rude: because it's kind like backsies. I agreed that we'd have the same name but i want to get "famous" under my original name not "our family name". It's like I'm not owning the married name fully.

whateves. I'll stick with my original name for submitting, maybe he won't notice when he looks me up in the index...

Jamesaritchie
06-04-2010, 11:01 PM
Buggered if I know why any woman would take her husband's surname anyway.

. Change).

Because, fortunately for the world, most women still recognize the innate superiority of men, so wish to be associated as closely as possible with the family that produced a male child.

seun
06-04-2010, 11:02 PM
It would only be rude if your maiden name was something like Flaps.

Shadow_Ferret
06-04-2010, 11:04 PM
Just for the record, I was kidding. :D
It's your work, you can submit it under any name you want.

Just make sure you put your LEGAL name up in the upper left hand corner of the manuscript and on all email correspondence.

Your maiden name will only appear on the byline, which is probably the most important line anyway.

scarletpeaches
06-04-2010, 11:04 PM
Because, fortunately for the world, most women still recognize the innate superiority of men, so wish to be associated as closely as possible with the family that produced a male child.I hate you.
It would only be rude if your maiden name was something like Flaps.But you? You I love.

stormie
06-04-2010, 11:07 PM
Use your maiden name proudly. You are not an appendage.
.

Amadan
06-04-2010, 11:10 PM
you all make valid points. i needed reassurance i think.

why would it be rude: because it's kind like backsies. I agreed that we'd have the same name but i want to get "famous" under my original name not "our family name". It's like I'm not owning the married name fully.

whateves. I'll stick with my original name for submitting, maybe he won't notice when he looks me up in the index...

That could be embarrassing when your book is picked by Oprah or becomes a Hollywood movie.

But seriously, troll comments notwithstanding, there's nothing wrong with keeping your own name or (if you've already changed it legally) wanting to use it for professional purposes. If your husband gets butthurt about it, use the first royalty check to hire a good divorce lawyer...

milly
06-04-2010, 11:12 PM
my maiden name is horrendous...so is my married name...I'm screwed either way

i may just opt for something random like Milly :)

scarletpeaches
06-04-2010, 11:13 PM
Use your maiden name proudly. You are not an appendage.This, this, this.

Concise and oh so true.

For the record, the reason I use a pen name is I wanted a name that was entirely mine and not from a family I can't stand so in a way I'm in a similar situation but not quite.

Use the name that is more 'you'.

As stormie said, you are not an appendage. To anyone.

icerose
06-04-2010, 11:20 PM
you all make valid points. i needed reassurance i think.

why would it be rude: because it's kind like backsies. I agreed that we'd have the same name but i want to get "famous" under my original name not "our family name". It's like I'm not owning the married name fully.

whateves. I'll stick with my original name for submitting, maybe he won't notice when he looks me up in the index...

You don't owe it to your husband to use his name, but you do owe it to him to have a conversation about it.

You're married now. It means you're in a partnership. This back alley stuff of not telling him and why you feel this way makes me feel like you don't trust him to understand and that's not a good way to start things.

Even (especially) if you think this is going to be a problem you need to talk about it now. Make your feelings clear and why you are doing it. Stand firm or whatever, but have the conversation.

Carolanne Patton
06-04-2010, 11:30 PM
<----My maiden name.

Phaeal
06-05-2010, 12:34 AM
Maybe I'll use my confirmation name. Wow, I once thought "Bernadette" was a cool name?

Next time I'm confirmed, I'm going for "Galadriel." Now, that's pretty.

As for the maiden name, go for it. I'm guessing that you can use that both as a pen name and a DBA (doing business as) name, the DBA being for all legal purposes, but I'm definitely no lawyer, so I'd ask one first.

Bartholomew
06-05-2010, 01:04 AM
i want to get my publishing credit as ME. I dunno, I want MY name, not my new married wifey name, (just married on May 1st).

i just feel possessive still about submitting as the original me.maybe because i come from a small family and there aren't any more of us coming (only girls in our line).

he comes from a big family and they all so attached to the last name....

Is it awful to want to get a pro credit as the original rather than the new and improved?

Nope. My flute teacher does not use her married name for performances, seminars, etc.

Shara
06-05-2010, 01:11 AM
Your name is your name. Don't apologise for keeping it. I didn't change mine when I got married. When people address me as 'Mrs hisname'. I still get annoyed. I'm still Ms myname, thank you very much. I could never get my head around the concept of being Mrs anybody.

People forget there is no legal obligation for a woman to change her name when she gets married. I object on the grounds that it makes me sound like a possession. He doesn't have to change his - why should I change mine?

The name on my book cover is the name on my birth certificate, and it will be the name on my death certificate. It might not be anything special, but it's mine.

Vespertilion
06-05-2010, 01:11 AM
My maiden name starts with Mc-- McAnything has it's own line at any alpha-by-last name registration ever. My married name starts with A. That's why I changed it, I shit you not. I am that lazy.

That said, my given name and married surname are a sad, common little combo not fit for print. I might go with the nee, but I'll probably invent something that sounds good at the time, but that will cause me no end of headdesking later.

johnnysannie
06-05-2010, 01:14 AM
Because, fortunately for the world, most women still recognize the innate superiority of men, so wish to be associated as closely as possible with the family that produced a male child.

Ha! From the lips of a man!

As for the original post, I had planned to keep and use my own name (maiden if you want to call it that) because I already had publication credits with it but my husband's old-fashioned, ultra conservative type family (including DH) was less than thrilled so I compromised and use my entire name - first, maiden, and married.

It works because my maiden name is uncommon so it stands out. I would not have been happy writing under my married surname alone.

Monlette
06-05-2010, 01:29 AM
When I was a newly-wed, my in-laws gave me some old cookbooks from back in the days when a woman had to be published under her husband's last name AND first name.

***Winning recipes***
Corn fritters - Submitted by Mrs. Oliver Hornblatt
Meatloaf - Submitted by Mrs. Douglas Livingston
Pineapple upside cake - Mrs. Harold Dench

Great. She creates an award winning recipe, and he get the credit for marrying such a great cook?

Well,I suppose that does make some sense... ;)

Stlight
06-05-2010, 01:44 AM
Speak gently to him. You never know.

I was married to a somewhat free spirit, do-what-you-want,-but-let-me-know-where-you-are-when-you-do-it sort of guy. But I never got the hang of being called Mrs. Hislastname. After 13 years we got divorced. He didn't mind the divorced, but when he discovered I was taking my maiden name back, he threw an absolute ... fit.

You never know how they are going to take it. I had no idea his name *coughpossessivenesscough* was that strong.

That surprised me. Okay, I should have paid more attention to the details and less to what I thought was going on.

Cyia
06-05-2010, 01:53 AM
When I was a newly-wed, my in-laws gave me some old cookbooks from back in the days when a woman had to be published under her husband's last name AND first name.

***Winning recipes***
Corn fritters - Submitted by Mrs. Oliver Hornblatt
Meatloaf - Submitted by Mrs. Douglas Livingston
Pineapple upside cake - Mrs. Harold Dench

Great. She creates an award winning recipe, and he get the credit for marrying such a great cook?

Well,I suppose that does make some sense... ;)

This is how my grandmother always signed her name. Meanwhile, my mom gets annoyed when her "legal" name is put down as though her maiden name is her middle name instead of the middle name she was given at birth.

Mr Flibble
06-05-2010, 01:53 AM
I'm in the 'talk to the Old Man' camp.

Yes, i can see why you want to use your maiden name. (I did actually think about going double barrelled when I got married. Because then I would have had the initials JFK :D)

It's not that you're subjugating to his name, but surely there was a reason you took his name when you married (esp. considering you don't have to) so think hard. What is it about this particular thing that makes you want to use your maiden name? Will it totally upset him if you don't use the name you use in real life? How do you both feel about it? Talk. (This infomertial on how to have a happy marriage brought to you by a certified loony idiot who is still happily married. Thor knows how he puts up with my weirdness....but I'd hazard it's because we talk about things that bother us. Oh and he's completely a sweetheart and lovely and awesome and has great ideas for stories :D)

As said upthread - you're a partnership now. Don't hope he won't notice. If he's any kind of hubby worth keeping, he will. And he may be incredibly hurt you didn't feel you could talk to him about it, or that you would go behind his back to distance yourself from him or...well, any number of things.

If you liked your maiden name so much, how come you didn't keep it when you married?

bethany
06-05-2010, 02:25 AM
Sharing my married/maiden name story :)

I never wanted to change my name. Luckily my husband was really cool about it. Ended up changing it ten years into the marriage because we had a child who had to go to specialists and was supposed to have extensive surgery, and the different names just caused an extra headache when I didn't need any more stress. My husband was sort of upset that I changed it because he really understood, he didn't want to change HIS name, so he could see why I didn't want to change mine. (ETA obviously there was no pressure for him to change his name, but he's pretty empathetic)

Published under my maiden name. Still think of myself that way, despite the fact that the last group of kids who ever called my Ms. Griffin will be graduating tomorrow. No wait, second to last!

willietheshakes
06-05-2010, 02:39 AM
There are only two people who can answer this question -- you and your husband.

It doesn't matter what a message board believes if your husband is going to be hurt or offended, and whether that influences your decision or not.

mccardey
06-05-2010, 02:50 AM
Your name is your name.

also your father's name ;)

But yeah, I'm published under my ahem maiden name. All the writers I know do the same, just so you know... Not that it's mandatory - just saying it's not that unusual...

backslashbaby
06-05-2010, 02:51 AM
Sharing my married/maiden name story :)

I never wanted to change my name. Luckily my husband was really cool about it. Ended up changing it ten years into the marriage because we had a child who had to go to specialists and was supposed to have extensive surgery, and the different names just caused an extra headache when I didn't need any more stress. My husband was sort of upset that I changed it because he really understood, he didn't want to change HIS name, so he could see why I didn't want to change mine. (ETA obviously there was no pressure for him to change his name, but he's pretty empathetic)

Published under my maiden name. Still think of myself that way, despite the fact that the last group of kids who ever called my Ms. Griffin will be graduating tomorrow. No wait, second to last!

Oh, you never know :D My Ex said, You'll take my name, right? And I said, I was thinking you'd take mine. He laughed. I don't see what's laughable.

Yeah, we never made it official, either. I'm not big on certain traditions ;) I never could get him to stop expecting me to clean up after him, though...

KTC
06-05-2010, 02:56 AM
There are only two people who can answer this question -- you and your husband.

It doesn't matter what a message board believes if your husband is going to be hurt or offended, and whether that influences your decision or not.

QFT

KTC
06-05-2010, 02:57 AM
Maybe I'll use my confirmation name. Wow, I once thought "Bernadette" was a cool name?

Next time I'm confirmed, I'm going for "Galadriel." Now, that's pretty.

As for the maiden name, go for it. I'm guessing that you can use that both as a pen name and a DBA (doing business as) name, the DBA being for all legal purposes, but I'm definitely no lawyer, so I'd ask one first.

HA! That reminds me...my confirmation name is JEREMIAH. I thought it was all that and a bag of chips when I was 12. (-;

scarletpeaches
06-05-2010, 03:03 AM
also your father's name ;)

But yeah, I'm published under my ahem maiden name. All the writers I know do the same, just so you know... Not that it's mandatory - just saying it's not that unusual...Not always.

Some of us are bastards.

mccardey
06-05-2010, 03:10 AM
Not always.

Some of us are bastards.
__________________


Oh, you know what I mean... Why pick on a dear old lady before she's even had her coffee...??

thethinker42
06-05-2010, 03:10 AM
I'm published under both my maiden and married names. My husband doesn't care...he just gives me a hard time for using his last name for my gay stuff. :D

scarletpeaches
06-05-2010, 03:10 AM
Hey, come on. That was a great feed line. "Come on, call SP a bastard." You missed out.

thethinker42
06-05-2010, 03:13 AM
Hey, come on. That was a great feed line. "Come on, call SP a bastard." You missed out.

"Bastard" is about the least offensive thing I'd ever think to call you, so it would be a bit anticlimactic, don't you think?

mccardey
06-05-2010, 03:28 AM
Hey, come on. That was a great feed line. "Come on, call SP a bastard." You missed out.

Well, if you'd waited till I'd had my coffee....!!! Now you've gone and ruined it for everyone...

ishtar'sgate
06-05-2010, 04:29 AM
i want to get my publishing credit as ME. I dunno, I want MY name, not my new married wifey name, (just married on May 1st).

No, I agree. I don't think it's rude at all but I sure never thought of my married name as not being me. My name doesn't define who I am so it makes no difference to me what name I publish under. Publishers don't care either. They'll put whatever name you want on your work but will pay you under your real name or your company name if that's your preference.

Miss Plum
06-05-2010, 04:35 AM
Because, fortunately for the world, most women still recognize the innate superiority of men, so wish to be associated as closely as possible with the family that produced a male child.
lol

(I get it.)

Medievalist
06-05-2010, 04:39 AM
i want to get my publishing credit as ME. I dunno, I want MY name, not my new married wifey name, (just married on May 1st).

Are you sure that your "maiden name" isn't your current legal name?

And no, it's not rude. It is an issue for some people though.

Medievalist
06-05-2010, 04:41 AM
Because, fortunately for the world, most women still recognize the innate superiority of men, so wish to be associated as closely as possible with the family that produced a male child.

Like her father?

Miss Plum
06-05-2010, 04:44 AM
There are only two people who can answer this question -- you and your husband.

It doesn't matter what a message board believes if your husband is going to be hurt or offended, and whether that influences your decision or not.

I agree with this. You need to ask these questions on a marriage therapy forum, not an author's forum.

Miss Plum
06-05-2010, 04:47 AM
If your husband gets butthurt about it, use the first royalty check to hire a good divorce lawyer...
I think that's the most logical direction for this discussion.

Miss Plum
06-05-2010, 04:49 AM
I was married to a somewhat free spirit, do-what-you-want,-but-let-me-know-where-you-are-when-you-do-it sort of guy. But I never got the hang of being called Mrs. Hislastname. After 13 years we got divorced. He didn't mind the divorced, but when he discovered I was taking my maiden name back, he threw an absolute ... fit.
What a butthead. I'm glad for your sake you're divorced.

scarletpeaches
06-05-2010, 04:49 AM
I agree with this. You need to ask these questions on a marriage therapy forum, not an author's forum.I'm single, so I'm just guessing here, but it might be more helpful if she actually spoke to her husband.

Medievalist
06-05-2010, 04:52 AM
I'm single, so I'm just guessing here, but it might be more helpful if she actually spoke to her husband.

Wow, you sure come up with some wacky ideas!

scarletpeaches
06-05-2010, 04:54 AM
Wow, you sure come up with some wacky ideas!It's all those peanut M&M's I eat. The blue ones make the room spin.

Miss Plum
06-05-2010, 05:09 AM
I'm single, so I'm just guessing here, but it might be more helpful if she actually spoke to her husband.
I think it's a lost cause with him. I was going to say something about her marriage, but didn't . . . which is why I suggested a marriage therapy forum.

willietheshakes
06-05-2010, 05:29 AM
I'm single, so I'm just guessing here, but it might be more helpful if she actually spoke to her husband.

Welcome to page two, you bastard. :)

scarletpeaches
06-05-2010, 05:30 AM
Screw you, buddy.

I was replying to the- oh, fuck it. Fancy a spot of tea? I have biscuits.

willietheshakes
06-05-2010, 05:34 AM
Screw you, buddy.

I was replying to the- oh, fuck it. Fancy a spot of tea? I have biscuits.

Heh-heh...

Biscuits. :D

mccardey
06-05-2010, 05:35 AM
Biscuits!!! Yayyy!!

scarletpeaches
06-05-2010, 05:37 AM
Shortbread.

I'm sure I have cake somewhere too.

willietheshakes
06-05-2010, 05:39 AM
Shortbread.

I'm sure I have cake somewhere too.

Biscuits AND cake!

(must... not... pursue...pie-related...innuendo...)

(must...also...steer...clear...of...muffin...comme nt)

mccardey
06-05-2010, 05:39 AM
(must... not... pursue...pie-related...innuendo...)

(must...also...steer...clear...of...muffin...comme nt)

See - I knew if I just waited.....

cooeedownunder
06-05-2010, 10:50 AM
This, this, this.

Concise and oh so true.

For the record, the reason I use a pen name is I wanted a name that was entirely mine and not from a family I can't stand so in a way I'm in a similar situation but not quite.



Think, we've had this chat before...but you chose my maiden name, so it can never truely be yours but is mine :D

Nivarion
06-05-2010, 12:39 PM
Well, I'll take a whack at this as honestly as I can.

As a man, I would like you to talk to me about it first. Men are really very strait to the point, and though we hide it we do have feelings too. We appreciate it when someone is straitforward and honest with us.

I would feel hurt or left out of the loop if you were published and THEN I found out that it was your maiden name, and not our name.

But if you came to me and explained why you wanted to use your maiden name then I i know that personally, I would understand why and be able to support you in this.

congratulations on your marriage. May many happy years lie ahead of you.

timewaster
06-05-2010, 01:50 PM
i want to get my publishing credit as ME. I dunno, I want MY name, not my new married wifey name, (just married on May 1st).

i just feel possessive still about submitting as the original me.maybe because i come from a small family and there aren't any more of us coming (only girls in our line).

he comes from a big family and they all so attached to the last name....

Is it awful to want to get a pro credit as the original rather than the new and improved?

No. I first published under my maiden name though I was married at the time.
I changed genre and now use my maiden name as an initial and write under my married name.
If I were to write in a different genre again I would like to go back to using some version of my original name. All I will say is that other people find it more confusing than I do. You can call yourself whatever you want.

Ken
06-05-2010, 03:29 PM
... why not use both names: your maiden one and your hubby's.

If your name is Jane Doe and his is John Smith, for instance, the one you'd put on your book would be Jane Doe Smith. Then again, you'd still have to settle on an order for the names: Jane Doe Smith or Jane Smith Doe, which could present difficulties, too, but comparatively less than opting for Jane Doe over Jane Smith or Jane Smith over Jane Doe. So I'd go for Jane Doe Smith or Jane Smith Doe, if you choose to go this route.

ps Oops. If you use Jane Doe Smith the Doe might be mistaken for a middle name. So you'd have to hyphenate the Doe and Smith or Smith and Doe: Jane Doe-Smith. PM me and I'll be happy to elaborate further ;-)

defyalllogic
06-05-2010, 04:48 PM
I did talk to him.

It's good to hear that it's not just me that wanted to use my maiden name. I wasn't sure if that was common or if it was just me. like putting bananas instead of strawberries in your cereal. i wasn't sure if it was just me being weird/selfish.

i explained that in most everything i don't have any issue with being Mrs Maiden Married. i like it. i'm proud of it. like i'm proud of this ring that cuts of my circulation when i sleep and have to take it off in the middle of the night. but for my art and my writing i just got attached to "a persona" and idea of me that i want to own. i want to be totally greedy and put it on my shelf and say I did that.

some people are attached to their names, others aren't. i am. he thinks it's important for us to be a unit and have a family name. it makes sense. we agreed that it'll take some getting used to and maybe later I'll switch over and share the credit with the Misses.

it'll take some use to being Italian now...

Chumplet
06-05-2010, 05:11 PM
My husband didn't mind my using my maiden name for my writing. He jokingly says he won't mind being called "Mr. Cormier" when I get famous.

He's not particularly attached to his name. His family history is shallow in this country, and the name is rather rare here. It's also kinda clunky.

Glad you talked it out with your dude. Keep those communication lines open!

backslashbaby
06-05-2010, 10:01 PM
It always freaked me out that I wouldn't know what my name would be. Like, growing up when girls write their name on their notebooks with the last name of their boyfriend. I knew it wouldn't be any of the current dudes, so it was a mystery. That freaked me out -- it's my NAME ;)

I'm glad people have stopped pretending that it should feel totally normal all the time. It's bound to feel odd to some folks!

friendlyhobo
06-06-2010, 07:02 AM
This happened on an episode of the Jefferson's. Seriously.

Emily Winslow
06-06-2010, 11:52 AM
Where I live, many of the married women have a "professional name" (maiden) and "social name" (married). No one thinks anything of it.

I took my husband's last name legally, which he didn't want me to do, because I wanted us and our future kids to have one family name.

I agree that the OP should "talk to her husband" but I understand why she wanted to ask other writers if what she is doing is common or bizarre. Yes, it's common for a woman who has taken her husband's name to write under her maiden name.

PS--When I took my husband's last name, I dropped my middle name and replaced it with my maiden name. I am now, legally, "firstname maidenname marriedname." This can get confusing, because it's unclear whether my last name is just "marriedname" or "maidenname marriedname." On the phone with utility companies, they often can't find my name AT ALL in the computer, and we have to experiment with different versions. You DON'T want that to happen when someone looks up your books! So, be cautious with that pattern as an author. I agree with the person who suggested hyphenating, if that's the route you take. I don't hyphenate personally, but if this were my "writing name" I think it's the only way to ensure people know for sure where your last name begins.

willietheshakes
06-06-2010, 08:02 PM
For the record, my wife made it easy on both of us: there was no way she was taking my name in the first place (c'mon - Wiersema? Would YOU take it?).

Soccer Mom
06-06-2010, 08:29 PM
I'm glad you worked it out with your husband. Your marriage is more important than what name you want something published under. A name is just a name to me. I could keep my father's name or take my husband's. Neither name was any more "mine" than the other. I took my husband's because it was convenient. DH, kids, and I all share a surname. Makes life simple. The only way I wouldn't have changed my name was if he had a truly horrible name like "Mr. Dickweed."

keighkeigh
06-06-2010, 08:37 PM
fabulous pen names are time honored. cool-sounding names just make a better product -- it's your primary "label." using a maiden name is a logical choice.
use any name you want, use initials, use diff spellings. think of famous authors, think of movie stars, think of, gosh, even football stars! lots in a name. also adds a touch of additional privacy, which can be helpful if you are the next jk rowling!

shaldna
06-11-2010, 03:34 PM
not rude at all.

Alpha Echo
06-11-2010, 04:27 PM
Buggered if I know why any woman would take her husband's surname anyway.



Because we, or at least I, am adopting a new family. Yes, my mother and father will always be my family, but when you get married, I'm under the belief that that man (and in my case, his child) are my family. THEY come first. I want to be part of the family with him, so I want his last name.

That's just my opinion.

As for publishing under your maiden name, I don't think that's any different than someone using a pen name. Do whatever you want!

Unfortunately for me, I think it would sound best for me to publish under my first married name. THAT name was a unique, good sounding name that people would remember. But I can't use my first married name when I'm changing my name to my new husband's name. My new hubby wouldn't appreciate that, and honestly, I am excited to have no ties to my cheating ex husband.

I think when I get published, I'll use initials. A.R. Plummer.

MGraybosch
06-11-2010, 06:02 PM
Is it awful to want to get a pro credit as the original rather than the new and improved?

No, it isn't. And if your husband can't deal with you wanting credit under the name you choose to use, then he doesn't deserve to be your husband.

Hell, if I thought my wife would let me, I'd publish under the name Eddie Van Helsing. :)

PhoebeNorth
06-14-2010, 05:48 AM
Not rude at all.

But, hell, I hadn't even considered changing my name for a second when I got married last October. The fact that people had been telling me that it sounded like a writer's name since I was about 8 sure as heck had something to do with it!

(Oh, and as for kiddies, we're planning on giving any girls my last name, any boys, his. This is partially at my insistence, sure--because it just seems more fair, but as I pointed out to him, neither of our mothers have the same last names as us anymore thanks to divorces/remarriages/name changes, and we don't feel any less like they're our moms! Lots of options these days. None any better than any other.)

Carmy
06-15-2010, 09:09 PM
As somebody mentioned earlier in the thread -- are you sure your maiden name isn't still your legal name? It's the custom for women to take the husband's name but not the law.

And what if you (heaven forbid!) get divorced, do you want your novels to be in his name or your own?

Christine N.
06-16-2010, 12:45 AM
Two things:

Catherine Gilbert Murdock
Kristin Clark Venuti

I met both these authors a couple of weeks ago. Both used their maiden and married names on their book. Kristin actually corrected the person who introduced her with a 'don't give my husband's family all the credit!' (it was a joke). Catherine Murdock's sister is Elizabeth Gilbert, author of "Eat, Pray, Love". So there's a connection there.

Go ahead and use your maiden name. Tammy Pierce does it (can't remember Tim's last name). Jane Yolen does it (her married name is Stemple).

No problemo!