So, you're a superhero...

The Shoveler. I shovel.




ETA - This was my 5K. What a waste!

Faster than a rolling o, stronger than silent e, able to leap capital T in a single bound...

Oh wait, that's taken.

ETA: And you probably need to be over 40 to get the joke.

If I could be a Superhero,
I would be Drug-Free Boy.
Telling the world of the evils of drugs,
and the lives that they destroy.
well I'd take all the junkies getting so high
With their needles and bongs and sticks made of thai
as I'd burn them alive and I would squeal with joy.
'Cause I would be Drug-Free Boy.

I am a superhero...I have a superhero Name. But I can't tell you what it is 'cause I'm all incognito and stuff. Sorry. I can tell from here you're making that exasperated noise and smiling at the same time--pretty amazing, huh?

I used to have my kids covinced that when they were asleep, HyperDad and WonderMum were out there, saving children from monsters under the bed and other awesome exploits.

I was quite sad when they figured it out

I wanna be Slappy!

I will be Super Crackhead, beating down fools with my giant crack pipe of death, especially Drug-Free Boy. That dude really pisses me off for some reason.

<---- Spasmo the Frigmuchly

I'd be Ringworm-man, punishing evil-doers by giving them nasty foot funguses.

I'm Super

I'd pick WonderWomanChocoGirl from the planet Chocolatieria

My superhero name would be Temper-Ella, because I have the worst morning temper on the planet and I really enjoy flaunting it!

I'd be known as The Redhead and villains all over the world would flee from my flame-haired wrath.

I'm a fairy princess, I don't need to be a superhero.

I might break a nail untying some girl from a railroad tie.

Oh, I missed the nemesis part of the OP.

I'm pretty sure Spasmo's nemesis would be a lot like Rush Limbaugh but shorter and with a really squeaky voice. His function would be to present idiotic ideas to the less intelligent portion of the American public in a way that made them believe they were unpatriotic if they didn't believe him. He'd work for a mysterious entity known only as "El Machino" (not to be confused with the cool tortilla maker at Chevy's).

In the TV series that would air after the movie was released but before the action figures went on sale, every episode would end with Spasmo kicking pint-sized Rush through a red, white and blue field goal. He'd squeal like a little piggy as he flew out of sight holding his backside. Then Spasmo would adjust her pink satin cape and strike a Captain Morgan pose as the credits rolled.

I'll be Léon Ann du Flœur, with my special vehicle the Grande Chêne Lit which I am not fond of using.

My nemesis would Standig Uprecht.

I'd be ReWrite Girl!

-able to circle anything in blue from a hundred paces and makes pages of words disappear with just a sweep of my hand and a click.

oh, wait
I am ReWrite Girl,...
wow.
That sucks.

I forgot to add my nemesis as well. He would be that dastardly villain named...Shears. Armed with razor-sharp scissors, he'd try to chop off my flowing locks.

Grammera. I stop all run-on sentences with a swish of my red pencil!

You used a dangling participle? Slash! Slash! Slash!


Participle no more.

I wouldn't dream of naming myself. I read the comics. That's the press' job.


I just want to be the scary one in the shadows that makes the bad guys s*** themselves. Hmmm... on second thought maybe I need to come up with my own name after all. The Poopy Pants Avenger doesn't have quite the right ring to it.



Clearly I need no nemesis, being my own worst enemy. ... ooh! I could be a twin!

I'd be SuperMom (or so I'd like to think)

my nemesis would be

IdiotDad

I met a real superhero on holiday recently. His name was Timeshare Man. I was his nemesis. He named me Fun Hater.

I destroyed him.