View Full Version : Beta reader for romance needed, please!

05-11-2010, 06:50 PM
I'm looking for a few hard core brutal beta readers to help whip my long romance MS into shape. I have rhino skin to hit me with your best shot. Its currently 573 pgs/163k words. Been writing since I learned how to scribble letters(have around 30 MS in various stages of complete) but none have been read by anyone but me. I think I need some help tightening it up and making it shorter if that's possible! http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums//images/icons/icon7.gif Ok, maybe a lot more than that also, but I don't want to scare you away! lol
If you only have time for a quick read - plot, character look - ok, that's fine. Beggars can't be choosers.

Quick Storyline:

After surviving a car accident that killed both her parents and nearly left her paralyzed, Jenna Caldwell did not expect that the only other person who meant anything to her would dump her after three years of dating. Fate could not really be that cruel, could it?
Deciding that it would be a cold day in hell before she opened up her heart and let anyone in again, Jenna didn't count on the flamboyant Jackson Lattimer to stroll into her life and refuse to leave. Rich, spoiled and arrogant, Jack was a constant thorn in her side until she caught a glimpse of his vulnerable side he kept deeply hidden. Jenna soon discovered that they had more in common than she thought.
The wall she built to protect her fragile heart was suddenly crumbling under his tender kiss and when he is nearly killed in an avalanche, Jenna realizes that she'd fallen in love with the one person who could once again bring her to her knees.

If you're game, PM me.
Greatly appreciate all you betas. Couldn't get a thing to publishers without you all!!!

05-11-2010, 08:32 PM
Wow, that is quite a long book! Kudos to you for completing it!!! I honestly do not have time to be a beta reader, sorry, but can I make a suggestion? If you ever want this thing to be published, you need to get it under 100k. My publisher won't even look at works over 100. Before you seek out a beta reader, you should sit down and really determine what can be cut. Are there subplots that can be axed? How long of a time does the story take place?? Romance novels are character driven and should move relatively fast. You need to take out scenes that do not build character or move the story forward. And dialog...make sure you nix any unnecessary dialog like casual conversations. If it does not further the story, chop it. And dialogue tags...it's amazing how many words you can eliminate in a MS by cutting the unnecessary ones. And what about descriptions of things and setting your scenes?? You should be able to tighten them up and say what you need to say in a few powerful words rather than lengthy paragraphs of description.

Hope this helps! :)

05-14-2010, 03:45 AM
Hi. I do agree that the manuscript needs to be cut, but you probably already knew that. I also realize it can be hard to know what to cut after spending so much time on it.
What I'm trying to say, is that I'd be happy to help if I can. I'm currently taking summer classes at the local college, so my response times may be slow, but if you're interested PM me.

05-19-2010, 05:27 AM
I do not mean to come across as rude or blast you in a public forum but i'm deciding to write this here since my comment applies to probably 50% of everyone who posts in this forum..

I don't think you are getting the most out of Absolute Write. I looked at your posts and I noticed you haven't done one critique of anyone's work.

Critiquing the works of others is a great way to improve as a writer. Also, it is the best way to make friends on here. I have dozens of friends who I can ping on a moment's notice to give me a crit or beta read for me.

I hope you find what you are looking for and I hope you will be more active and visit the SYW forum more.

Trust me, it will do wonders for your writing, story development, and also making AW friends who will be happy to Beta for you.