First Line Importance

First I think that the first sentence hook is a bit of an exaggeration, but your first paragraph should set up a compelling situation or character.

Why? Every writer faces a lot of competition -- everything from other writers who do it better to the amount of money in the readers wallet. If you want to be published, you have to rise above your competition.

The good news: most people read more than one book in their lifetime. Maybe, even buy them.

A mundane first line will not stop the reader reading the rest of the novel, true, but a brilliant first line can set an atmosphere and immediately capture you.

Think about the first line of Pride and Prejudice. It's witty and it sets up the themes of the novel. Choosing 'any old line' makes it look as if the writer doesn't care; the more effort that appears to have gone into the novel, the more likely the reader is to stick with it.

dogfacedboy said:

Has anybody ever read the first sentence of a book and decided not to read even another sentence further?

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Yes. I do it consistently as a reader.

Additionally, doesn't even a mundane first sentence sort of imply that it's going to lead to something else?

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Nope.

When I attended Donald Maass' "Writing the Breakout Novel" workshop, we actually spent about a half-hour talking about the importance of the first line and why it's so important. His explanation is that it's important not because it's a "hook" but it's the reader's first impression of the book and you don't get a second chance at the first impression routine.

So that first line has to start the story by asking a story question that the reader will want to learn the answer to. That's not a hook, that's starting the story in an interesting way.

After much discussion, he asked various participants to read the first sentence of the manuscripts we brought to work on. Afterward, he asked the group how many would keep reading. There were people being killed, planes exploding just before landing, swindles discovered and any number of active things happening in those first lines. The response from the group was always scattered to few or none.

Then someone (not me) read the following first line: "Evelyn, I need your help."

Every hand--including Maass'--went up. We wanted to keep reading.

It's a pretty standard sentence--however it asks TONS of questions: Why does the speaker need help? Why specificially Evelyn's help? What's so special about Evelyn that she's the only one? How bad is the mess the speaker's in to request that help?

It starts the story by asking questions readers want answers to.

So your example of Jimmy woke up feeling sick COULD be a great first sentence to a novel because it asks questions--how sick? What kind of sick?--and could be a good lead-in to a novel if Jimmy feeling sick actually was an entry point into the story.

Does that make sense?

As long as the first line makes you want to read the second, the third, etc... then it's done its job.

It's not supposed to be for "point of sale." That's the job of the blurb. I hardly know anyone who buys or does not buy/read a book based on the first line alone.

However, if it does have a sucky first line ("Mary woke up to a beautiful morning, heard the birds sing, and was very happy" - no thanks!), I'd be more inclined to put it down but usually I will give the book at least a few paragraphs.

The first sentence is a little harsh. As a reader for me, it’s the first paragraph.

I was in a similar session with Maass as DeleyanLee described, and had the same experience. I found it so profound it changed the way I write. I need to get a great first line before I can go further, and I've had fewer false starts since doing this.

First lines matter a lot to me, because the first thing a reader reads sets the tone and their expectations for the rest of the book. It may not be something they're aware of, but it happens. While a mediocre one might not hurt you all that much, it already puts the reader in a "where's the good stuff" mood. If you don't offer that right away, you might lose a reader. And a bad first line can make someone set down the book. Starting with something bad doesn't bode well for the rest of the book.

You have to remember that agents get hundreds of queries a day. If your query interests them and you sent pages, they'll often take a peek. If the first line sucks, they might just move on to the next in the stack. A lot of it depends of how interested the agent is in the query. If the query is great they'll give you a few more seconds of reading. If they're so-so on the query, a bad first line is a no, while a good first line earns you a few more seconds. That might just be enough to get a partial request.

A great first line is just one more opportunity to hook a reader, agent or editor. With so much against you when you're submitting a book anyway, why waste this opportunity? A rocking first line immediately sets up an "ooo this is gonna be good" expectation. A so-so one leaves the reader waiting for the good stuff to start.

And for what's it worth, I've had tons of people tell me they were hooked from my first line and that made them want to buy the book.

I give a novel a page...actually, probably a whole chapter before I decide if it's crud or not. Two books I've read in the past 6 months didn't qualify as any good from their first pages, but both turned out to be pretty good reads.

Spooky, I just wrote a blog post on this exact subject today.

Anyway, as has been said here, the first line is your book's first impression to the reader. There are so many other books a reader can buy besides yours, so your book needs to make a great first impression. And while some people will give the first paragraph a try even if the first sentence isn't that great, there are those who will put the book down at that first sentence. For example, busy editors who have plenty of other manuscripts to read.

I usually read the blurb on the back of the book, then skim the first few lines. If those first few don't get me, I'll put it back on the shelf. And if the first line is bad, like that "Susy sunshine" example earlier, I don't even go beyond that.

But really, none of your writing should ever be "just any old line". Chances are, if it's just any old line, it should have been cut out of the manuscript in the first place.

Some of my favourite books have started with less than auspicious first lines.

That said, there's no reason to just 'settle' for any old line. Make it the best you can. Then the next, and the one after that....

Danthia said:

A great first line is just one more opportunity to hook a reader, agent or editor. With so much against you when you're submitting a book anyway, why waste this opportunity? A rocking first line immediately sets up an "ooo this is gonna be good" expectation. A so-so one leaves the reader waiting for the good stuff to start.

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Although I can see writers, agents and editors going overboard with this and putting too much emphasis on a hooky first line, and the result would be all books start with a "bang" line, trying to grab you. And scanning through the books I have and the books I've seen at the store, I would gladly say that it's not really the case. Not every book starts with hooks like "Sarah had only twenty-four hours to live" etc.

I do agree with the "ooh it's gonna to good" sentiment but I'd relax that to more than just the first line. First paragraph, maybe, or even two. I can understand that agents and editors have limited time and if you don't interest them quickly enough, they have other things to do. Still, I would caution writers trying to put too much bang into a single opening line, and I am wary about the culture where an agent or editor would only give you one line to hook them. Fast food nation has a better attention span.

There's a difference between having a hooky first line and having a first line that makes you want to read the rest of the book. Personally, I think as long as you achieve the latter, it's fine. If you bore me with your first two paragraphs, I'm done with you.

I was reading this one book written in the 40s... the first line was kind of regular... nothing special about it... but it got me to read the second... and before I knew it, I came to the end of the first chapter. Now, that's a good beginning, because it moved me along without me being aware of it. It kept me interested, even though the first line wasn't auspicious at all.

The vampire vanished with a puff of blue smoke when touched by the zombie's time-laser.

caw

Your forgot ninjas. FAIL.

My favourite first line ever is the one of One Hundred Years of Solitude. Now that catches you immediately.

Although there are good books whose first line, paragraph, even the whole first few chapters suck. Just look at the beginning of Les Mis. How many people read the part about the bishop at first reading? The "second opening" where Valjean arrives at town is way better.

dogfacedboy said:

I keep hearing/reading that the first line is extremely important. I'm told that you need to grab your reader's attention within one sentence or risk losing your audience altogether.

I don't get it.

Has anybody ever read the first sentence of a book and decided not to read even another sentence further? Additionally, doesn't even a mundane first sentence sort of imply that it's going to lead to something else?

For example: Jimmy woke up feeling sick. This is nothing special for a first line, but the fact that it's opening the story gives it that much more impact. I guess my point is that I don't see why I need to grab the reader immediately with some kind of amazing opening line when it seems like any old line will do. It's not the strength of a single line that's going to make or break your story. It's the way it's written as a whole. One wave does not an ocean make, as they say.

Thoughts?

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Yes, I have, on many occasions, opened a book, read the first sentence, and put the book back on the shelf. And most published books have better first sentences than most manuscripts from new writers. You'd be amazed how many slush pile manuscripts, and how many queries, get rejected on the basis of that first line.

I agree that the use of the word "hook" is exaggerated, but this does not mean any old first sentence will do. The first sentence must give the reader a reason to read teh second sentence, the second sentence must give the reader a reason to read the third sentence, and so on. The moment you give a read a reason to stop reading, tthe reader will stop.

Agents and editors are very busy readers with a whole stack, or a whole room, full of things begging for their attention.

It's the strength of every line that sells your book, particularly the strength of all the lines in the first three and last three chapters.

Honestly, if you opened a manuscript with Jimmy woke up feeling sick, I wouldn't read another word. It's boring, and it's the worst possible kind of tell, rather than show. It is, in fact, the classic bad first sentence. It's a horrible, horrible sentence anywhere in a book, but as the first sentence, it's deadly. If you want to see some variation of that sentence over and opver and over, read a slush pile, or the first page of an incredible number of self-published novels.

You have, at most, about 250 words to impress an agent, and editor, or a reader standing in a book store, and if you use a first sentenec like that one, you just lost 245 words.

When you start bad, there's no reason to believe you'll get better, and long experience tells agents and editors, and even general readers, that you won't.

And ask yourself this; if you don't believe readers should stop after the first sentence, then when should they give up hope? After the fifth sentence. After the twenty-fifth? After the two hundredth?

I'm actually a little biased towards writers I already like. Even if their first line, or page, are eh, I'll give them the benefit (but after a chapter if it's still eh, even the favs get put down). Though I also have a problem that if I'm a few chapters in and a good story goes south, I feel I HAVE to finish. It's just my psyche. I want to know what happened rather than leave it to mystery.

The first line I feel is like a Chinese finger trap. You need to pull the reader in, but not try too hard, to the point where you just make a mess for yourself that you can't live up to. The first line is important, but not because it's your sell-line (IMO). It's important because it naturally sets the tone, setting, perhaps one or several characters, and needs to be able to unjoltingly bring the reader in for the ride. Basically the line says "this is what the rest of the book is like; this is what you're reading now" and gives the beginning of something the reader is going to want to follow. Either it's amusing or suspenseful or SOMETHING that's going to keep us going. But it doesn't need to be a darling (which as we all hear over and over...we usually murder). It just needs to be the kind of thing that's like shaking a hand with a new acquaintance and telling them about their new adventure. Giving an impression of what's to come.

And I've also heard it's common among some writers that their first draft first line changes drastically from their final draft first line, since they have a clearer idea of the overall story and ending.

I changed the first line of The Pacific Between just a bit before I sold it.

Jamesaritchie said:

The first sentence must give the reader a reason to read teh second sentence, the second sentence must give the reader a reason to read the third sentence, and so on.

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I think that's the most important thing about the first line.

It doesn't matter so much if you start with a BANG as long as it's something interesting and immediate enough to compel the reader into the second sentence.

kuwisdelu said:

I think that's the most important thing about the first line.

It doesn't matter so much if you start with a BANG as long as it's something interesting and immediate enough to compel the reader into the second sentence.

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Exactly. Yu don't need a big bang, you just need an active, interesting senetnec that leads naturally to teh next active, interesting sentence. You have to make the read want to know what happens next by keeping him interested in what's happening right now.

maestrowork said:

Although I can see writers, agents and editors going overboard with this and putting too much emphasis on a hooky first line, and the result would be all books start with a "bang" line, trying to grab you. And scanning through the books I have and the books I've seen at the store, I would gladly say that it's not really the case. Not every book starts with hooks like "Sarah had only twenty-four hours to live" etc.

I do agree with the "ooh it's gonna to good" sentiment but I'd relax that to more than just the first line. First paragraph, maybe, or even two. I can understand that agents and editors have limited time and if you don't interest them quickly enough, they have other things to do. Still, I would caution writers trying to put too much bang into a single opening line, and I am wary about the culture where an agent or editor would only give you one line to hook them. Fast food nation has a better attention span.

There's a difference between having a hooky first line and having a first line that makes you want to read the rest of the book. Personally, I think as long as you achieve the latter, it's fine. If you bore me with your first two paragraphs, I'm done with you.

I was reading this one book written in the 40s... the first line was kind of regular... nothing special about it... but it got me to read the second... and before I knew it, I came to the end of the first chapter. Now, that's a good beginning, because it moved me along without me being aware of it. It kept me interested, even though the first line wasn't auspicious at all.

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I agree with this wholeheartedly. I also can't imagine putting a book down based on one line, or even a paragraph. Unless maybe it was in Japanese and I was checking the difficulty level, but even in that case I usually read the first paragraph or so. Japanese books have different standards, though, because they're so much work that if it's not as good it's going to be harder to convince myself to keep going.

Anyway I say yes, it should be something to make the reader interested, but I actually don't like the traditional concept of a "hooky" first line. Sometimes they work great, and sometimes they're just lame. I feel like a lot of people try too hard. I also think the first line of the book isn't necessarily representative of the rest. I'm sure I've read great books with first lines that weren't to die for, and I'm sure I've read books with great first lines that turned out pretty eh overall. Hell, I've read books where the first hundred pages were so-so, but by the end they were awesome. I buy a book based on the story. If the story sounds cool, I'll read it even if the first line isn't very good.

Now getting an agent to read it might be a different matter...

IMO the First Commandment of first lines is: Thou shalt not sound dumb and amateurish.

And the second is: A first sentence should lead in smoothly (what extreme written for shock value face-slappers don't do).

Other than that, wottever works. I can't say a first sentence has ever made me buy a book, but some I've seen in SYW have made me back off.

First and last lines of every scene count, but the first line of the story counts a bit more. If you start off confident, focused, interesting, relevant and establish a strong rapport with the reader then you've just made your best first impression and the reader will start looking for reasons to read more. But if you don't, then the reader may start looking for reasons to stop reading.

This is especially important with readers who already have reasons to stop reading -- like readers of a slush-pile, or students reading a book prescribed for class.

dogfacedboy said:

I keep hearing/reading that the first line is extremely important. I'm told that you need to grab your reader's attention within one sentence or risk losing your audience altogether.

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I'm not so sure you'd lose all readers with a hohum first line but you'd be sure to keep them with a great one.

My favorite first line is from A Christmas Carol - Marley was dead: to begin with. How could anyone possibly stop reading after that line?

I'm of the camp that if the blurb interests me and the first paragraph or few pages interest me, then I'm hooked. I don't usually pay attention to the first line unless it starts the story off with a WOW. If the writing sucks, I won't read it. The first line doesn't make much of a difference to me.