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Ungrateful writers

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NewKidOldKid

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Over the past month, I beta'd two novels. I provided lots of feedback, made plot suggestions, helped with mistakes... The works. With one book, I took a few more days than I had originally promised (because of deadlines) and the writer sent me five different emails asking for an update (I gave her one every time). In both cases, I emailed the manuscript back with a note saying to let me know if they had questions. Can you guess what happened? Utter silence. I never heard from the writers again. Now, I'm doing this as a favor, I'm spending my time helping you make a better book... Is it really out of place to expect a thank you? Nothing fancy. Just a quick email saying Hey, thanks for your time. Am I being petty about this? It actually bothered me and made me rethink whether I want to keep being a Beta.
 
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Chris P

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I'm sorry you had that experience. It's probably common, sadly. Shoot, most of the feedback I've given in SYW got little response, so I can imagine how you feel. I'll keep this post in mind when it's time for me to have a beta. I have not yet betad because between two jobs, community involvement, and trying to write I have no time and could not be of much service to the writer.

My suggestion would be to keep doing it if you enjoy it, feedback or not.
 

jana13k

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Extraordinarily rude, but indicative of our "entitled" society. I don't read for anyone I haven't hand chosen. I work a full-time job, have book deadlines and do freelance work. I also have a family, dirty laundry, etc. The one thing I have less of than money is time.

Maybe you need to be more selective, or charge a fee.
 

incognitopress

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methinks if your critique was spot-on and not gushing with praises about the writers' brilliance, they were less enthused to respond. Last time I reviewed someone's memoir (and not harshly, I might add), their feathers were quite ruffled. I never critiqued after that, except in my creative writing class. I mean, why bother? I find that people generally get so defensive, they take editorial criticism personally.
 

brainstorm77

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Over the past month, I beta'd two novels. I provided lots of feedback, made plot suggestions, helped with mistakes... The works. With one book, I took a few more days than I had originally promised (because of deadlines) and the writer sent me five different emails asking for an update (I gave her one every time). In both cases, I emailed the manuscript back with a note saying to let me know if they had questions. Can you guess what happened? Utter silence. I never heard from the writers again. Now, I'm doing this as a favor, I'm spending my time helping you make a better book... Is it really out of place to expect a thank you? Nothing fancy. Just a quick email saying Hey, thanks for your time. Am I being petty with this? It actually bothered me and made me rethink whether I want to keep being a Beta.

I suggest asking the individuals what's up?
 

ether

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I wouldn't beta for anyone who couldn't even take the time to thank me for my efforts. Beta'ing isn't even a matter of just reading and saying if it was good or not, they're expecting you to actually critique and point out things that could use improvement. That's tough work.
 

NewKidOldKid

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One of the books I read was quite good. I let the writer know this right from the beginning and then focused on details that I thought would make the manuscript even better. This was the writer who sent me the five emails. I guess from now on I'll be more selective. I don't get the defensive mentality. I mean, aren't you looking to make your book better? Or do writers just go around searching for someone to tell them how great their book is? "Oh, don't change a thing. It's perfect." No, it's not. No book is. And you asked me to tell you where the imperfections are! I'm sorry, I guess this really bothered me. Maybe more than it should. I'll think twice the next time I'm asked to beta a book.
 

Wayne K

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We should have a bewares thread for such people, but I can see that going horribly awry
 

mscelina

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I only beta for writers that are very good friends of mine anymore. I've had way too many occasions where I'll beta a manuscript--detailed line by line crits--and then the writer would 'miraculously' stop being my friend. There are maybe four people who beta for me regularly and about ten I've done a beta/crit for in the last year. I tend not to move outside that circle because I quite frankly don't have the time. But yeah--a beta without even a thank you grates my oats. Makes it oh SO not worth it.
 

NewKidOldKid

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Thanks. I feel a little better knowing I'm not the only who would react this way.
 

Chase

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You have my sympathy. It's puzzling, the same as when grandkids, nephews, nieces, etc. don't thank or even acknowledge birthday, Christmas, and graduation gifts. It's like they're so entitled that there can be no consequences for rudeness.

It's sometimes the same when you try to answer a question on a subject you've studied or experienced and get ignored.

My rationale is I learn a lot from these forums and like to pay it forward. Still, a beta read is quite a lot of effort, so in that case, I just swap labor. Quid pro quo seems to attract a better class of writers.

Edit. Sorry if I repeated some of the above.
 
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stormie

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Oh, I'm sorry this happened to you! Unfortunately, it does happen, more often than not. It happened to me with a former student and with a friend. No thank you, just silence each time.

Two options--be more selective, or state up front what it will cost them for your work and time.
 

NewKidOldKid

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I thought about charging, but then figured I would like to have a beta one day (when/if I finish my book). Since I'm broke, I'd be looking for a free one. So paying it forward (and in advance) seems like the decent thing to do. Chase's suggestion of swapping feedback makes a lot of sense. Maybe that's what I'll do next time.
 

Cella

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I'm sorry this has happened to you, souring your experience. That's very, very rude of someone. :Hug2:

Please hang in there! They're not all like that!
 

adktd2bks

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I do a lot of crits on SYW and about half of them don't ever respond to my critique. I guess that's fairly common in SYW, but for a whole beta read it's very, very rude. My suggestion would be that the next time you volunteer to beta, request one chapter at a time and give comments back in sections. If you start to notice that the writer just isn't responding to your suggestions and making the effort to thank you from the get go, then you can stop the beta without having wasted a lot of your precious time.
 

KTC

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I don't think you're being petty. The least the writer can do is say thank you.

On the flip side...I have let down at least 2 AW members by not following through with a critique of their work. Dropping the ball, as it were. I know how hard it is to devote time to beta/critique other writers...your time should have been thanked. I hope they see this thread and extend an olive branch your way.
 

Jess Haines

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I've had similar experiences. These days, I've limited my beta offers to friends and people whose ideas or work I've already seen inspired me to contact them. It's hardly petty to expect a "thank you" for the work that goes into a beta read.
 

Marian Perera

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I feel a little better knowing I'm not the only who would react this way.

I'd feel likewise. I critique query letters occasionally, but I only beta for one person - an online friend whom I've never met in person but whom I've known for about nine years now.

He's read nearly all the drafts of my manuscripts, chapter by chapter, and has always provided direct and useful feedback. I send him a gift card each time we complete a manuscript, and he's in the acknowledgments of the book I have coming out this year.

Good critiquers aren't easy to find, so I intend to hold on tight to this one. :)
 

Rowan

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I can relate to your experience. I've beta read for a handful of writers who didn't even acknowledge my input. Even when prompted they give you a "yeah, got it." Check out the threads at the top of this forum---you'll find a lot of beta readers in the same boat. As others have said, I now only beta read on a very limited basis. I work F/T and have limited free time so I can understand your frustration. I've even had individuals who don't have one post to their names PM me asking for a beta reader!!! WTFO? Fly by beta reading? No thank you.

Try a beta swap--that way it's a two-way-street. I'm working with someone right now and we're swapping 30-50 pages at a time. Then doing a revise and resbumit, etc. :) So don't give up hope! :)
 

AuburnAssassin

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I think you have every right to be upset too. Whether they found your critique constructive or not, your time alone was worth at least a "thank you". That's never too much to ask.
 

Aji

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Try a beta swap--that way it's a two-way-street. I'm working with someone right now and we're swapping 30-50 pages at a time. Then doing a revise and resbumit, etc. :) So don't give up hope! :)

This was what I was going to suggest. That way, at least you know you're also getting a critique in return if you swap your manuscript in chunks or as a whole and have a predetermined date of when to send it back to your beta partner(s).

I think you have every right to be upset too. Whether they found your critique constructive or not, your time alone was worth at least a "thank you". That's never too much to ask.
Agreed.
 

setchmo

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Bad Karma heading their way. Very uncool. Sorry to hear this happened to you. Some people just don't get it and never will.
 

Sevvy

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Or do writers just go around searching for someone to tell them how great their book is? "Oh, don't change a thing. It's perfect."

Yes, actually, that's exactly what some people do. *shrugs* It's why I don't ever critique for a good friend unless I know they can handle me saying "this could use some work".
 

HighDesertBrat

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A polite thank you note, at least acknowledging the time you put in (even if they didn't like your critique) would have been nice, perhaps even the proper thing to do.

However, do you really do this just as a favor? Personally I learn more from critiquing than I do from receiving crits. Seeing mistakes/inconsistencies/problems in someone else's work makes the light bulb go on over my head. "Ah, that is what *whoever* meant when they said, "blah,blah blah."
 
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