I am frustrated, frustrated and underrated, I tell you!!!
.... and I cannot cuss about it, otherwise this little rant would be in the House of Hate.
(I hate that I cannot rant about this, but that is a different rant.)<o
></o>
<o> </o>
I’ve been at AW for a few years and I have learned more than I ever dreamed there could be to learn about writing and publishing and getting published. <o></o>
<o> </o>
I have even learned that I will probably never learn everything there is to learn about writing and publishing and creative media.
<o> </o>
I know one thing for a fact: I know more about the subject than either of the two department heads... Terry and Oswald<o></o>
<o> </o>
There is a novel that wants publishing, and it is in terrible shape. Salvageable...but unpublishable in its current form. I've told some of you about this.<o></o>
<o> </o>
(Well, I have to admit that there are places that we ALL know about and these places will be happy to publish it exactly as is...for a fee.)
<o> </o>
Ok...go back...way back to 2001...before I worked here...Lainie was given the task of getting the novel published...
<o></o>
(What...? what my company does.? We’ll just say that the firm that employs me takes on any project that they deem is feasible. Believe me when I type: If you came up with a plan to grow smiling purple carrots on the left side of the Empire State Building in January, and you had a well written business plan, my company would be happy to look at it to see if it is feasible enough to warrant either investment in, or outright purchase of your idea.)
<o> </o>
Lainie wrote the worlds’ worst query letter and sent it to 150 publishers she found on line. There were no responses. Not even from subsidy publishers!<o></o>
<o> </o>
Several people have pulled it out over the years. They’ve sent the same query letter to the same exact publishers, and the result was the same.
<o> </o>
A former staff member-friend told a current staffer that I had something published and I know about the process of writing/publishing, so I was dragged on board at that point. (BTW, my job title has nothing to do with writing or publishing...my job is the systematic, ritualistic torture and abuse of consultants and employees alike. (..there were many who tried to prove they were badder, but they didn’t last and they died as they tried....))<o></o>
<o> </o>
AHEM::: I digress.
<o> </o>
So, I researched getting things in print.... (not too hard since that is what I have been dedicating almost all of my waking hours to since......ah......I’m not even going to hint at my age...)<o></o>
<o> </o>
We all know that there is a process for pitching and selling one’s work.<o></o>
<o> </o>
We all know that the process for fiction is different from non-fiction.
<o> </o>
We all know that, no matter how closely an author clings to historical reality, that historical fiction IS fiction, and not a text book for reference.<o></o>
<o> </o>
So, I’ve done all the ‘leg work’ twice as it is; I’ve gone through the process of explaining that one can ‘pitch’ an incomplete non-fiction project based on an excellent outline and several well-crafted sample chapters, but unless one is a well-known published author like..well Stephan King..comes to mind a publisher is going to want to see a finished product before considering an unsolicited fictional manuscript by an unknown author with no track record....We’ve discussed and agreed on the fact that the project needs to be completely re-written. We’ve even discussed that any big publisher...like Penguin or Random House...even if they agreed to read the manuscript, would turn it down and never speak to us again after getting to the 4<SUP>th</SUP> page.<o></o>
<o> </o>
I’ve taken Oswald and Terry (the new and improved ‘Lainies’) to some of the publishers’ websites and shown them the submission guidelines. I’ve gone over everything that has been done before...<o></o>
<o> </o>
And what I’ve gotten for my trouble is “Great work, Jay. This is really thorough and well thought out. You really know what you are doing. Now take this list of publishers and send them each a letter asking what steps they want us to take to get this published, how soon can we expect a contract, and when will we get paid.”<o></o>
<o> </o>
(Are your jaws moving but no words coming out? Yeah..it was kinda like that.)<o></o>
<o> </o>
“But, Oswald...I just told you....”<o></o>
“Yes, I understand what you have told me. You have been very thorough. Now here is the list of publishers we want contacted. (same list as Lainie used. Just looking it over...well some of them are out of business ...and...welllllll some of them are subsidy publishers, and most of them are ‘agented only.)<o></o>
<o> </o>
Deep breath.<o></o>
<o> </o>
I can back out of the whole thing, hide in my office, and watch it fail...again....<o></o>
<o> </o>
OR, I can do EXACTLY as I am instructed and wait for them to come back with the expected response and then say :”Well, I TOLD YOU SO OSWALD, now let’s do it the right way. (however, I refuse to sign those letters. If I sign those letters, I will never get my own stuff published as I will have announced to the world that I am an idiot).
<o></o>
The second way could take a year or more..during which time I will likely get another Oswald, Terry or Lainie and have to repeat the entire process.<o></o>
<o> </o>
Did I, at some point offend the gods of writing? Am I in hell?
Isn't there...somewhere on one of these threads...something that 'Uncle Jim' wrote down about how to get ones self published?
(Should I pull it up on my screen and force Oswald to look at it real close like???)<o></o>
.... and I cannot cuss about it, otherwise this little rant would be in the House of Hate.
(I hate that I cannot rant about this, but that is a different rant.)<o
></o><o
> </o>I’ve been at AW for a few years and I have learned more than I ever dreamed there could be to learn about writing and publishing and getting published. <o
></o><o
> </o>I have even learned that I will probably never learn everything there is to learn about writing and publishing and creative media.
<o
> </o>I know one thing for a fact: I know more about the subject than either of the two department heads... Terry and Oswald<o
></o><o
> </o>There is a novel that wants publishing, and it is in terrible shape. Salvageable...but unpublishable in its current form. I've told some of you about this.<o
></o><o
> </o>(Well, I have to admit that there are places that we ALL know about and these places will be happy to publish it exactly as is...for a fee.)
<o
> </o>Ok...go back...way back to 2001...before I worked here...Lainie was given the task of getting the novel published...
<o
></o> (What...? what my company does.? We’ll just say that the firm that employs me takes on any project that they deem is feasible. Believe me when I type: If you came up with a plan to grow smiling purple carrots on the left side of the Empire State Building in January, and you had a well written business plan, my company would be happy to look at it to see if it is feasible enough to warrant either investment in, or outright purchase of your idea.)
<o
> </o>Lainie wrote the worlds’ worst query letter and sent it to 150 publishers she found on line. There were no responses.
Not even from subsidy publishers!<o></o><o
> </o>Several people have pulled it out over the years. They’ve sent the same query letter to the same exact publishers, and the result was the same.
<o
> </o>A former staff member-friend told a current staffer that I had something published and I know about the process of writing/publishing, so I was dragged on board at that point. (BTW, my job title has nothing to do with writing or publishing...my job is the systematic, ritualistic torture and abuse of consultants and employees alike. (..there were many who tried to prove they were badder, but they didn’t last and they died as they tried....))<o
></o><o
> </o>AHEM::: I digress.
<o
> </o>So, I researched getting things in print.... (not too hard since that is what I have been dedicating almost all of my waking hours to since......ah......I’m not even going to hint at my age...)<o
></o><o
> </o>We all know that there is a process for pitching and selling one’s work.<o
></o><o
> </o>We all know that the process for fiction is different from non-fiction.
<o
> </o>We all know that, no matter how closely an author clings to historical reality, that historical fiction IS fiction, and not a text book for reference.<o
></o><o
> </o>So, I’ve done all the ‘leg work’ twice as it is; I’ve gone through the process of explaining that one can ‘pitch’ an incomplete non-fiction project based on an excellent outline and several well-crafted sample chapters, but unless one is a well-known published author like..well Stephan King..comes to mind a publisher is going to want to see a finished product before considering an unsolicited fictional manuscript by an unknown author with no track record....We’ve discussed and agreed on the fact that the project needs to be completely re-written. We’ve even discussed that any big publisher...like Penguin or Random House...even if they agreed to read the manuscript, would turn it down and never speak to us again after getting to the 4<SUP>th</SUP> page.<o
></o><o
> </o>I’ve taken Oswald and Terry (the new and improved ‘Lainies’) to some of the publishers’ websites and shown them the submission guidelines. I’ve gone over everything that has been done before...<o
></o><o
> </o>And what I’ve gotten for my trouble is “Great work, Jay. This is really thorough and well thought out. You really know what you are doing. Now take this list of publishers and send them each a letter asking what steps they want us to take to get this published, how soon can we expect a contract, and when will we get paid.”
<o></o><o
> </o>(Are your jaws moving but no words coming out? Yeah..it was kinda like that.)<o
></o><o
> </o>“But, Oswald...I just told you....”<o
></o>“Yes, I understand what you have told me. You have been very thorough. Now here is the list of publishers we want contacted. (same list as Lainie used. Just looking it over...well some of them are out of business ...and...welllllll some of them are subsidy publishers, and most of them are ‘agented only.)<o
></o><o
> </o>Deep
breath.<o></o><o
> </o>I can back out of the whole thing, hide in my office, and watch it fail...again....<o
></o><o
> </o>OR, I can do EXACTLY as I am instructed and wait for them to come back with the expected response and then say :”Well, I TOLD YOU SO OSWALD, now let’s do it the right way. (however, I refuse to sign those letters. If I sign those letters, I will never get my own stuff published as I will have announced to the world that I am an idiot).
<o
></o> The second way could take a year or more..during which time I will likely get another Oswald, Terry or Lainie and have to repeat the entire process.<o
></o><o
> </o>Did I, at some point offend the gods of writing? Am I in hell?
Isn't there...somewhere on one of these threads...something that 'Uncle Jim' wrote down about how to get ones self published?
(Should I pull it up on my screen and force Oswald to look at it real close like???)<o
></o>
Last edited:
