View Full Version : Anyone wanna beta for first 50 pages/15,000 words of YA Paranormal?

12-18-2009, 03:29 AM
Hi, like the thread name says, I'd like a beta(s) only for the first 50 pages of my YA paranormal (roughly 15,000 words). I've had a few super awesome betas critique the whole thing through, but I need someone's opinion who hasn't read all of it. Here's part of the query, but I'm not sure how much help it'll be for someone only reading the beginning of the story. Thanks and PM if interested! :D

Blue Abyss is a completed 62,000-word young adult novel spun with mystery, romantic suspense, and self-discovery. Explored in this modern-day paranormal twist on Beauty and the Beast is the depth of teenage confusion, passion, and the hurdles of an ordinary adolescent with an extraordinary love story.

Holly Crosby is an emotionally fragmented teen with her fair share of lifeís obstacles. At age seven her parents were killed in a car crash in Florida and she was forced to live with an unfamiliar aunt in Vermont. On her first day of school in her new town, she noticed a pair of shockingly blue eyes staring out of the infamous Thorne house. Seconds later, a body is smashed against the very same window. Holly had not only witnessed a murder, but was unknowingly about to embark on a life changing adventure.

Ten years have gone by and not a single day without being scrutinized by the looming eyes. Several more unsolved murders have occurred, each victim being a Thorne. Holly isnít sure why the eyes have such a daunting interest in her until the Thornes blackmail her and she is forced to work for the family. Once she begins employment, Holly begins to bud feelings for Brady Thorne, the gorgeous bearer of the blue eyes, but refuses to accept them out of fear. But Brady isnít shy about making his affections known: he constantly insists to Holly that they are eternal soul mates, but she knows that he, along with the rest of his eccentric family, are still withholding dangerous information. As Holly begins to unravel the mystery of the link between the murders and the eyes, she also uncovers an avalanche of emotions along with alarming secrets and betrayal from those closest to her.

12-18-2009, 04:55 AM
Hi there,

I'll beta it -- I love YA Paranormal and the query definitely sounds interesting. You can send it to shera_23 at hotmail.com.

Would you be interested in a swap? I have a 4,000 word short story I'd love to have another set of eyes on.

12-26-2009, 04:45 AM
This sounds so interesting. I don't know the genre, so I don't know if I would be much of a beta for it or not. But if you need another beta, PM me and I will send you my email address =)