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Hi all -- didn't know whether a sonnet thread would work on a line-by-line basis like the excellent limerick thread. But I thought I'd like to explore the form a bit. Join in, criticise, whatever.... Here's my first shot.
Goodbye
Deliver us from cold, shared loneliness;
Between us, passions wild no longer flare.
The metronomic, tortured march of time
Reminds me that we two are doomed, unless
We sunder now the promise in despair
Made in our courtship: permanent, sublime,
That life and death would both themselves expire
Before the incandescence of love's fire.
It's terrible to watch a creature die
Worse still to starve another to prolong
The first one's capability to cry
Where once abounded beauty in its song.
Let's part right now, while we can yet recall
The glow and comfort of past joy at all.
Goodbye
Deliver us from cold, shared loneliness;
Between us, passions wild no longer flare.
The metronomic, tortured march of time
Reminds me that we two are doomed, unless
We sunder now the promise in despair
Made in our courtship: permanent, sublime,
That life and death would both themselves expire
Before the incandescence of love's fire.
It's terrible to watch a creature die
Worse still to starve another to prolong
The first one's capability to cry
Where once abounded beauty in its song.
Let's part right now, while we can yet recall
The glow and comfort of past joy at all.