This may be heresy, but... (regarding Twilight)

Okay, every female I know "in real life" seems to adore Twilight. I've seen blurbs about it all over the news and entertainment shows and on the magazine stand.

But, I've never read it or watched it. Or, I should say, I hadn't until I got stuck at the hospital and one of the movie options during my time in captivity was Twilight (other options included a plethora of Disney movies, Benjamin Button, Valkyrie, Ghost of Girlfriends Past, a football movie, Earth, and some other Nat Geo flick).

Bored out of my mind and having read the newspaper inside and out...including the obituaries and the editorials (which are, surprisingly, often equally depressing in my book)... I thought, "What the hell, I'll see what everyone is talking about," and flipped on Twilight.

I'm still left without a clue. The only word that came to mind watching this movie was "insipid". Calling the actors wooden would probably be an insult to trees everywhere. This was a movie in dire need of parody. I kept hoping someone would attack Bella with a canister of NO2 so she might actually lighten up for a few seconds of the film.

I hope Cthulhu makes a cameo in the next movie and eats her, Edward, and Jacob in one gulp--sparkly skin, smirks, fur, and all.

Team Edward? Team Jacob? Not me, GO TEAM Cthulhu! FTW!

I really don't get the appeal of Twilight. *shrug*

Benjamin Button was kind of interesting, though. Didn't manage to make it more than a few minutes into Valkyrie or Ghosts of Girlfriends Past.

I wish I'd had some books w/ me instead.

cray said:

..but they are all so dreamy.

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Yeah, whatever. Bring on Cthulhu!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R49fQuwDu24

*nom* *nom* *nom*

Ambrosia said:

I enjoyed the Twilight series. Read all the books. One of the books wasn't that good and I almost quit. Don't ask me which as I don't remember right now.

The movie sucked big time. It was low budget and I agree about the wooden characters. In particular, the actress playing Bella couldn't have done a worse job. The "sparkling" in the movie sucked. Nothing like I imagined it. And, nothing like anyone who read the first book before seeing the movie imagined it. Horrid.

I understand the New Moon movie has a bigger budget so maybe it is better. I don't know. Haven't seen it yet. Thinking about waiting till it comes out on DVD and is discounted heavily.

Definitely read the books if you have any interest at all. Although she could have done better, the storyline was good and the books enjoyable.

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Nah, I burned out on vampires back in the 90's thanks to Anne Rice. But, I'll say one thing for Rice, she could certainly spin a good yarn.

I'll take your word for it that the books were better than the movie. What I saw was gawd-awful. I did see a review which hinted it was like Anne Rice trying to do a special for the WB--spot on critique if you ask me.

I stand by my conviction that the next movie will only be better if Cthulhu appears and devours the whole pouty teen lot of them.

Especially Bella and Edward.

*nom* *nom* *nom*

Judg said:

Heh. I'll join you in heresy, without seeing the movies or reading the books. Vampires, teen angst, passive heroine, broody stalker hero, what's to like? And I personally think Robert Pattison, or whatever his name is, is hideous.

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You had me at vampires + teen angst--or should I say wangst?

I'm really pissy about passive heroines. The damsel in distress archedtype is so 19th century! Don't give me a shrinking violet. I want to see a girl who can kick some butt, take some numbers and take-or-leave the hero if she likes. My fondest desire is to see a female character who tells her love interest "you're cute, but you're not that cute..." or "not tonight, honey, I've got to save the world".

My inner feminista is showing, I guess.

As for the guys playing the male leads...I can't help picturing them in 15+ years. I'm thinking deterioration a la Mickey Rourke...or worse, if there is such a thing.

The only way I'd watch another Twilight movie:

Ambrosia said:

Loved Dark Shadows!

Do you know they are making a new Dark Shadows Movie with Johnny Depp playing Barnabas? I can not wait.

http://scifiwire.com/2009/12/confirmed-johnny-depps-da.php

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Depp...Directed by Burton....

Okay, now this...me likey.

Love Tim Burton, and Johnny Depp is, of course, always fun to watch (except for Crybaby...don't get me started). I loved him as Sweeney Todd. Murderous rage with a a dollop of cannibalism was never so much fun!

I'm dying to watch him as the Mad Hatter next year. If ever a part was a custom fit for an actor....

Judg said:

Shrinking violets do exist, but they shouldn't be at the heart of a story.

I'm not overly fond of the opposite extreme either - the girl who thinks she has to out-testosterone the guys. There is such thing as being a strong woman, not a strong wannabe male. So I'm not a great fan of warrior princesses. On the other hand, a young queen who can keep a roomful of older male counsellors in hand and very clearly be in charge is a lot of fun. (How did you know? I didn't send you my WIP...)

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No, I'm not a big fan of the Xena type, either. She's a little too butch. I guess what I would like to see in a heroine is a female who is witty, cunning, etc. Also, a woman who has more on her mind that landing a mate. Can't a female character be indifferent about this topic?

I'd like a character that's just fun and interesting. So fun and interesting that gender becomes just a characteristic--one feature among many.

Men get a wide range of characters to select from, but women always seem to fall into the same-ol'-same-ol'.

Judg said:

Yes. Here's to interesting women with complex characters and diverse interests. But will men read them? *sigh*

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Might be able to sneak them in with a few mentions of large breasts?

J/K... I'm sure there are plenty of men who would enjoy reading about a strong female character. Are they as large a crowd as the ones who fill football stadiums and "read" playboy? Probably not, but then, the sort of women who would like such strong females in books are equally rare.

JoNightshade said:

I actually know 2 people - a couple, male and female - who enjoyed both of the Twilight movies. And have not read the books. Like, just plain enjoyed them. They tried to get us to come with them to New Moon.

I have Twilight, the book, sitting on my end table. I had to trade trying it to get my friends to read The Time Traveler's Wife. I still haven't been able to force myself to crack the spine. I will, though, I will try it.

Movie? NO. I'm sorry. Not for anything.

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It's okay, a little bacardi and you'll make it through