Tell me if this is funny

FADE IN:

INT. APARTMENT - DAY John is on the couch watching T.V. when he hears the door
open. Rob enters with Stacy, 24, a beautiful women holding
his hand. ROB
(points to John)
This is my roomate John STACY
(shakes John's
hand)
Hi John JOHN
(puzzled)
Hi.... You are STACY
Rob's girlfriend, Stacy JOHN
(looks at ROB)
Huh ROB
(hugging STACY)
Yeah, as soon as we met it was an
instant connection STACY
I'll see you later, Snuggle Bear ROB
Alright bye STACY leaves, ROB struts around smiling, JOHN pushes him JOHN
Where on earth did you find her ROB
I was temping yesterday evening at
the army base JOHN
So she's in the army









2.

ROB
(smiling)
No, she was just temping like me,
and we just couldn't keep
ourselves off of each other JOHN
Okay right now, before I find out
later, whats wrong with her? Is
she slightly blind and cannot
notice your strikingly
unattractive face Rob starts walking away and John grabs him ROB
Nothing is wrong with her, we just
have alot of the same things in
common JOHN
So she's also fat, bald, and ugly.
I know you're lying to me snuggle
bear. But I'll find out later Rob goes to his door and looks back and John
ROB
Maybe I'm just too likeable JOHN
Hence the name snuggle bear They both frown at each other and go in their rooms.
INT. OFFICE - DAY John is working on his computer, when Rob walks in with a
gas mask on his forehead.
JOHN
What is that on your head ROB
Oh, I forgot something at the
base, and had to go back and get
it









3.

JOHN
So why the mask, was there a
nuclear accident or something ROB
Ohh... they were spraying the base
for rodents JOHN
You're lucky you had that mask
then. Speaking of the army base
did you see the news, people are
protesting down there because of
the development of a new weapon of
mass destruction ROB
Yeah I saw them, but what
difference is a sign and a chant
gonna make against people with a
whole lot of guns and money Hassan, the manager of the office walks in
HASSAN
Whats up peeps JOHN
It's hard enough to understand you
when you speak regular english, so
why you even think of using slang.
What? Did you just get MTV or
something HASSAN
You are lucky we are not in my
country, because where I'm from
you would get 20 *****-slaps for
talking to me like that JOHN
I'm really busy here, so what do
you want Saddam Hassan HASSAN
Your mother but everyone already
has her John gets up and pushes Hassan, then Rob breaks it up









4.

ROB
(holding John and
Hassan back)
C'mon you two, haven't you learned
anything from me and Stacy, Love
is the most important thing in
life, so you two make up They both look at each other then John pushes Rob down to
the floor.
HASSAN
Good work John JOHN
Thanks They smile at each other, all of a sudden, the smiles turn
into a frowns, then Hassan leaves ROB
(gets up)
Why are you always pushing me JOHN
(working on
computer)
Because I just can't stop touching
you Snuggle-Bear ROB
Okay, I see JOHN
See what ROB
You're jealous JOHN
Jealous of what? ROB
When was the last time you were
with anyone as good looking as
Stacy? JOHN
Well......ummmmm...Tha.....Oh
yeah, remember Rebecca?









5.

ROB
Rebecca was your cousin JOHN
Second cousin. Anyway, to prove
I'm not jealous, I'll take you and
Stacy out to eat tonight ROB
What kind of food? JOHN
Mexican ROB
No, no, I don't like Mexican food,
it upsets my stomach JOHN
There isn't a type of food on this
planet that you don't like,
besides the restaurant is Gordos,
and I know you go there because
they have a table named after you ROB
Okay whatever Rob leaves and John gets back to work

JOHN
(working on
computer)
Now it's time to find out whats
really wrong with her INT. MEXICAN RESTAURANT - NIGHT John is sitting at the table eating, while Rob and Stacy are
kissing, although it looks as if Stacy's mind is on the food
but Rob won't give her a chance to eat it. Stacy gets up and
goes to the restroom.

STACY
I've got to go take a leak John is surprised but what Stacy said but thinks nothing of










6.

it and continues to eat. Rob watches her leave, then turns
around and looks at John smiling.

ROB
Well? JOHN
What? ROB
You can't find anything wrong with
her can you. It's impossible,
she's an angel JOHN
Well the sight of you two sucking
each other's faces off is making
me sick, so I'm gonna leave John gets up about to leave

ROB
Wait, wait. Don't be rude. You
have to at least tell her you're
leaving JOHN
(sitting down)
Alright Stacy comes back and kisses Rob

JOHN
Stacy, nice seeing you again I'm
.....

As he speaks, he notices Stacy scratching her armpits STACY
(eating food with
hands)
Ohhh. I'm starving Stacy burps, then blows a kiss with the sam breath, then
gets back to eating. John just watches smiling, while Rob
sits back in his chair with his head in his hands









7.

JOHN
(looks at Rob)
You've got to be kidding me right All of sudden Stacy stops eating, with discomfort showing in
her face STACY
Oh, oh. I think one is coming.
Snuggle Bear did you bring the
mask, because it's a big one Rob takes the gas mask out of his pocket and puts it on
JOHN
What's coming? Stacy falls to the ground and crouches, then lets out a fart
that shakes the restaurant. The smell is so potent that the
restaurant is evacuated, with some people fainting from the
smell

INT. APARTMENT - NIGHT Rob walks in to the apartment, while John is on the couch in
a robe, with his skin red ROB
I should be the one red. Why are
you red anyway? JOHN
They say that tomato juice gets
out the smell of skunk, so
hopefully this will work ROB
Ha, ha, very funny. It's not her
fault that her body produces such
an offensiive smell JOHN
It's not just the farting thing.
Know that I think about it, she
ate food with her hands, she
burped, she blew the burp to you
in a kiss









8.

ROB
(walks towards his
room)
But she was hot I thought I could
get past the other stuff. But I
couldn't so I broke up with her,
and now I'm going to go burn my
clothes JOHN
Just one thing before you go. How
exactly did you meet her ROB
It was on the Army base, but she
wasn't temping. You know that
Weapon of Mass destruction that
was in development, that everyone
was protesting JOHN
Yeah ROB
It was her *** John laughs while Rob goes into his room

FADE OUT.

sorry

I wrote it at script buddy, so when it copy and pasted it the format got a little bit messed up, but you can still read it.

thanks

thanks for the comments.