I need someone to look over my manuscript. It's an itty bitty YA fasntasy at 68K words. Mostly, I think I've picked out my mistakes and just need someone to read it over and check for flow/characterization/plot/and make sure the damn thing isn't confusing. I don't need a line by line, I just want someone to read it over from a reader's perspective and let me know if there's anything I need to change.
Here's my query. PM me if you're interested with your email address and I'd be happy to send it along.
Seventeen-year-old Milo would give anything to be able to go back in time and save his home and family from destruction at the hands of the Gods’ Golden Fires. When his prayers are answered in the form of the Ad-Finem, a time manipulating pocket watch, he begins to question how much he’s willing to give up for the power to regain what he’s lost.
Milo Castagnier is on the run from Chronos, the God of Time who wants him dead for tampering with the timeline. Milo is destined to become the next God of Time, and Chronos will sacrifice anything to make sure that doesn’t happen. When Milo proves too difficult for the God to find, he begins a war that would threaten millions of lives—all in the hopes of killing Milo. If Milo can’t think of a way to stop Chronos and the coming war, millions will die in his place.
Piecing together his history with the God, Milo begins a battle that spans from the beginning of time to its fabled end. Will time cease to exist if its only masters died fighting one another? Milo only knows that the only way he’ll ever see his family again is if he can destroy a God and set history straight.
Here's my query. PM me if you're interested with your email address and I'd be happy to send it along.
Seventeen-year-old Milo would give anything to be able to go back in time and save his home and family from destruction at the hands of the Gods’ Golden Fires. When his prayers are answered in the form of the Ad-Finem, a time manipulating pocket watch, he begins to question how much he’s willing to give up for the power to regain what he’s lost.
Milo Castagnier is on the run from Chronos, the God of Time who wants him dead for tampering with the timeline. Milo is destined to become the next God of Time, and Chronos will sacrifice anything to make sure that doesn’t happen. When Milo proves too difficult for the God to find, he begins a war that would threaten millions of lives—all in the hopes of killing Milo. If Milo can’t think of a way to stop Chronos and the coming war, millions will die in his place.
Piecing together his history with the God, Milo begins a battle that spans from the beginning of time to its fabled end. Will time cease to exist if its only masters died fighting one another? Milo only knows that the only way he’ll ever see his family again is if he can destroy a God and set history straight.
I can't promise I'll be the best beta out there as I have periods of uber-busy-ness, but I see you have no other offers in this thread, so I'll try it out.