Oranges

Bravo · Sep 14, 2009

so i walked into my gym today and was offered a free "mystic tan" session, usually valued at the ridiculous price of $22. although images of orange skinned bodies flashed through my eyes, i hypothesized that my melanin enriched body would be able to cope with one session.

well i was wrong.

i don't think i'm orange enough for other people to tell, but i still feel like a mess. and it smells!

i don't know how people do this nonsense.

never again.

this was my cosmetic pearl harbor.

Wayne K · Sep 14, 2009

Smish · Sep 14, 2009

Yeah, I think it's silly. My best friend did that for her wedding, and looked like an Oompa Loompa.

Bravo · Sep 14, 2009

so i just took a shower, and i have to say i think i look pretty good now. maybe it was just some sort of greasy residue.

crisis averted!

i'll check with some girls tomm just to make extra sure.

but so far i think i might be in the clear.

thank you everyone!

i can sleep well tonight

Sweetleaf · Sep 14, 2009

Wayne, that was insensitive and cruel.

Is it as bad as this?

spamwarrior · Sep 15, 2009

Pretty handy chart, that.

KellyAssauer · Sep 15, 2009

overtired said:
Wayne, that was insensitive and cruel.

Is it as bad as this?

Yeah but she has a staff of people whose only job
is to follow her around with mini-buckets of bronzer
loaded up in at-the-ready airbrushes...

That's so not fair.

Bravo · Sep 15, 2009

and yet, she still looks disgusting.

KellyAssauer · Sep 15, 2009

Bravo said:
so i just took a shower, and i have to say i think i look pretty good now.

Bravo said:
and yet, she still looks disgusting.

I'm going to have to think this over. =)

BenPanced · Sep 15, 2009

Poranges, who says ain't nothin' rhymes with "oranges".

KellyAssauer · Sep 15, 2009

Not even Door-hinges?

spamwarrior · Sep 15, 2009

I have Paris Hilton's book with me. The one she wrote about how to be heiress.

She wrote, and I quote, "There is no such thing as being too tanned."

*coff coff*

Bravo · Sep 15, 2009

okay did some checking, word is i look fine. one person claimed that she couldn't see a difference.

phew.

that shower worked wonders.

spamwarrior · Sep 15, 2009

Wait, did they put you in a tanning booth, or did they spray tanning stuff on you?

lucidzfl · Sep 15, 2009

First and foremost, there is nothing Ok about posting a paris hilton picture.

I am reporting you for banination.

Secondly, I just want to add, Oranges grow in my yard.

(Yes they are tasty!)

spamwarrior · Sep 15, 2009

I want an orange! I can't figure out to peel them, though.

*throws orange against the wall*

Bravo · Sep 15, 2009

spamwarrior said:
Wait, did they put you in a tanning booth, or did they spray tanning stuff on you?

a booth where they sprayed stuff on me.

BenPanced · Sep 15, 2009

spamwarrior said:
I have Paris Hilton's book with me. The one she wrote about how to be heiress.

She wrote, and I quote, "There is no such thing as being too tanned."

*coff coff*

Yeah. Tell that to the two men I've seen who are so tan, their skin is burgundy.

Oranges, poranges. Who says?

Sophia · Sep 15, 2009

overtired said:
Wayne, that was insensitive and cruel.

Is it as bad as this?

I think Paris Hilton looks nice in this picture. What exactly is the problem - is it the fainter patch in the middle of her back? The colour has been tweaked a little - the neck of the guy in front of her is slightly reddened, and if you look at her fingernails, you can see they've increased the saturation of orange and red hues. Even if they hadn't done that, I would love to look like her!

Millicent M'Lady · Sep 15, 2009

ElaraSophia said:
I think Paris Hilton looks nice in this picture. What exactly is the problem - is it the fainter patch in the middle of her back? The colour has been tweaked a little - the neck of the guy in front of her is slightly reddened, and if you look at her fingernails, you can see they've increased the saturation of orange and red hues. Even if they hadn't done that, I would love to look like her!

No you wouldn't!

som1luvsmi · Sep 15, 2009

lucidzfl said:
First and foremost, there is nothing Ok about posting a paris hilton picture.

I am reporting you for banination.

NOOOO! She's from NZ, she didn't know!

lucidzfl said:
Secondly, I just want to add, Oranges grow in my yard.

(Yes they are tasty!)

I have lemons in mine. (They're actually quite sour.)

Sophia · Sep 15, 2009

Millicent M'Lady said:
No you wouldn't!

LOL! Make the blonde hair black and butch up the face in these photos, and that is what I look like!

I'm still working on the rich and glowing part.

Millicent M'Lady · Sep 15, 2009

ElaraSophia said:
LOL! Make the blonde hair black and butch up the face in these photos, and that is what I look like! I'm still working on the rich and glowing part.

As long as you're not working on the vacuous and superficial part, work away!

Perks · Sep 15, 2009

Poor coral Bravo. It'll be over soon.

It's a sad state that no one in my heritage managed to seduce a single person with any melanin. We bred ourselves to Caspar and there ain't no spray that can fix that. I'm perpetually annoyed by it.

semilargeintestine · Sep 15, 2009

I'm pretty pale, but it's got an olive tone to it. I don't change colour. I don't tan, and I don't burn. I haven't worn sunscreen in a decade.

Oranges

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