How I almost got busted for carrying pot this weekend. . .(a true story)
So, I'm at my favorite hangout this last Saturday, (Dunn Bros coffee at Belt Line and Marsh Rd in Addison) and the place was pretty crowded. I am sitting at a table with my laptop, working on my novel, and I have to get up to get something out of my briefcase. I stand up, go around to the other side of the table, open the briefcase (this is one of those soft-side, leather satchel-type briefcases) and I'm digging around in it looking for a thumb-drive, because I wanted to remember to back up my novel.
I find what I'm looking for, but I've had to pull a bunch of stuff out of the briefcase, and lay it on the table, in order to get to the bottom of the briefcase where I found the thumb drive.
As I'm putting everything back into the briefcase, (extra mouse, digital camera, pens, notepads, bag of cough lozenges, USB cable, a paperback novel, my Kindle, etc etc) I hear something drop to the floor and I look down and see a plastic baggie with what looked like about a quarter-ounce of primo weed. It was mine, so I bent down to scoop it up and toss it back into the briefcase. As I'm stooped over picking it up, I look up and see two policemen watching me. I think nothing of it, until I go to toss my 'stash' back into the briefcase.
I see the look on Cop #1's face and I realize that, in his lawandorder mind, he's looking at a bust waiting to happen. He looks at his partner and chins toward me, saying 'check this out!'
They stand up and start walking towards me. . .and I grin, thinking, this will be funny.
Okay, let me back up a bit here.
A week ago, I started a new job. (Now, you're thinking. 'What? This car is fishtailing all over the road and is headed for the ditch!'. . . . but, I promise you, I will pull it out)
Okay so, last week, I started a new job, and since my office is not ready yet, I'm sharing an office, and I don't have all my 'stuff' in there yet. So, I have thrown several things into my briefcase to take in there.
One of the things I threw in there, to take to the office was a plastic baggie with four or five teabags of green tea. Not just any green tea. This is organic green tea, and it's fairly good stuff. It doesn't have the tea bag string, and the 'bags' are clear mesh. The 'tea' is organic, so it looks EXACTLY like pot, complete with seeds and stems and it is, of course, green.
Looking at it in a plastic baggie, like I had it in, it looks exactly like someone's stash.
Not that these lawmen could tell the difference though. Not to mention the fact that, a few feet away, you couldn't even SEE the tea bags itself, all you could see was the 'tea' itself.
So, there I am grinning like an idiot at these two policemen, who are walking towards me. I realized that they could easily plug me, or worse, taser me into submission, (don't taze me bro!) and ask their questions later. (I definitely FEAR the taser. And I don't know which I fear most, the pain of the taze, or the flopping around on the floor like a fish looking idiotic )
Now, maybe I'm getting crazy in my older age, but two thoughts flashed through my head as the Police were approaching me (three thoughts if you count the taser-fear thoughts) and these were:
How crazy would it be if I started running? Then they'd catch me and I'd explain what the substance was, and they'd have a question mark over their heads as to why I ran. . .
Or,. . . .I suddenly remembered a 'saying' that we had back in our dope-smoking, partying, wild younger days.
Actually, I didn't just 'remember' it, I actually said it. Out loud. As they were approaching me, and I was holding out my 'stash' for them to see.
"Hey, don't panic, it's organic!"
Sure, I'll admit that I was just trying to be a yuk-monkey, and I'll also admit that it didn't go over well with them. So, I was left standing there, holding my stash, with a bad case of failed-smile.
So, the one that was six-six, and 290 (he was the smaller one. . .I felt like I'd just been transported into the Land of the Giants) says, 'You want to explain that?" He was giving me a look, staring at me like I had a cuckoo coming out of my forehead and pinwheel eyes.
I explain that it was green tea, and that I had it in my briefcase to take to work, and had forgotten that it was in there. As I was explaining, I realized how lame it sounded, and then it occured to me, that they could actually take me in, and toss me into the graybar hotel. Luckily, there was a box of this green tea on the counter there, and I opened it up to show them.
They were finally convinced, and left, and actually had a good laugh out of it.
There is no moral to the story, just a pseudo-flashback to the 60's or somesuch.
Now there was this one time that I actually lit up an actual joint while talking to a cop. (it really WAS an accident, and this time, yes, it WAS real pot. . .LOL). . .but, that's another story.
So, I'm at my favorite hangout this last Saturday, (Dunn Bros coffee at Belt Line and Marsh Rd in Addison) and the place was pretty crowded. I am sitting at a table with my laptop, working on my novel, and I have to get up to get something out of my briefcase. I stand up, go around to the other side of the table, open the briefcase (this is one of those soft-side, leather satchel-type briefcases) and I'm digging around in it looking for a thumb-drive, because I wanted to remember to back up my novel.
I find what I'm looking for, but I've had to pull a bunch of stuff out of the briefcase, and lay it on the table, in order to get to the bottom of the briefcase where I found the thumb drive.
As I'm putting everything back into the briefcase, (extra mouse, digital camera, pens, notepads, bag of cough lozenges, USB cable, a paperback novel, my Kindle, etc etc) I hear something drop to the floor and I look down and see a plastic baggie with what looked like about a quarter-ounce of primo weed. It was mine, so I bent down to scoop it up and toss it back into the briefcase. As I'm stooped over picking it up, I look up and see two policemen watching me. I think nothing of it, until I go to toss my 'stash' back into the briefcase.
I see the look on Cop #1's face and I realize that, in his lawandorder mind, he's looking at a bust waiting to happen. He looks at his partner and chins toward me, saying 'check this out!'
They stand up and start walking towards me. . .and I grin, thinking, this will be funny.
Okay, let me back up a bit here.
A week ago, I started a new job. (Now, you're thinking. 'What? This car is fishtailing all over the road and is headed for the ditch!'. . . . but, I promise you, I will pull it out)
Okay so, last week, I started a new job, and since my office is not ready yet, I'm sharing an office, and I don't have all my 'stuff' in there yet. So, I have thrown several things into my briefcase to take in there.
One of the things I threw in there, to take to the office was a plastic baggie with four or five teabags of green tea. Not just any green tea. This is organic green tea, and it's fairly good stuff. It doesn't have the tea bag string, and the 'bags' are clear mesh. The 'tea' is organic, so it looks EXACTLY like pot, complete with seeds and stems and it is, of course, green.
Looking at it in a plastic baggie, like I had it in, it looks exactly like someone's stash.
Not that these lawmen could tell the difference though. Not to mention the fact that, a few feet away, you couldn't even SEE the tea bags itself, all you could see was the 'tea' itself.
So, there I am grinning like an idiot at these two policemen, who are walking towards me. I realized that they could easily plug me, or worse, taser me into submission, (don't taze me bro!) and ask their questions later. (I definitely FEAR the taser. And I don't know which I fear most, the pain of the taze, or the flopping around on the floor like a fish looking idiotic )
Now, maybe I'm getting crazy in my older age, but two thoughts flashed through my head as the Police were approaching me (three thoughts if you count the taser-fear thoughts) and these were:
How crazy would it be if I started running? Then they'd catch me and I'd explain what the substance was, and they'd have a question mark over their heads as to why I ran. . .
Or,. . . .I suddenly remembered a 'saying' that we had back in our dope-smoking, partying, wild younger days.
Actually, I didn't just 'remember' it, I actually said it. Out loud. As they were approaching me, and I was holding out my 'stash' for them to see.
"Hey, don't panic, it's organic!"
Sure, I'll admit that I was just trying to be a yuk-monkey, and I'll also admit that it didn't go over well with them. So, I was left standing there, holding my stash, with a bad case of failed-smile.
So, the one that was six-six, and 290 (he was the smaller one. . .I felt like I'd just been transported into the Land of the Giants) says, 'You want to explain that?" He was giving me a look, staring at me like I had a cuckoo coming out of my forehead and pinwheel eyes.
I explain that it was green tea, and that I had it in my briefcase to take to work, and had forgotten that it was in there. As I was explaining, I realized how lame it sounded, and then it occured to me, that they could actually take me in, and toss me into the graybar hotel. Luckily, there was a box of this green tea on the counter there, and I opened it up to show them.
They were finally convinced, and left, and actually had a good laugh out of it.
There is no moral to the story, just a pseudo-flashback to the 60's or somesuch.
Now there was this one time that I actually lit up an actual joint while talking to a cop. (it really WAS an accident, and this time, yes, it WAS real pot. . .LOL). . .but, that's another story.
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