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DTKelly
07-01-2005, 08:17 PM
Yeah, so. It's a rip off. Sue me. :wag:

The Princess Bribe
I don't want her, you take her.

Boy Story
Watch what Buzz and 'Woody' really do while Andy is asleep.

Evil Read
The Necronomincon has nothing on this book

Army Of Dorkness
The Story of the rise of Microsoft

Willy Wonky and the Chocolate Factory
I wouldn't eat the candy here

A Bag's Life
Form the tree to the landfill, you'll see it all.

City Slackers
A story about office interns who make a bet to see who can do the least work without getting fired.

robeiae
07-01-2005, 08:49 PM
Scar Wars-Vietnam vets compare scars

Rob :)

PattiTheWicked
07-01-2005, 10:37 PM
Clear and Present Dancer: Terrorist ballerinas get hold of a nuclear missile, and only Jivin' Jack Ryan can stop them!

Baster and Commander: The Surprise's cook takes over the ship when everyone else drowns.

Ocean's Elven: George Clooney teams up with Legolas to rip off a Rivendell casino.

Office Spice: Baby, Posh and Ginger join the Geek Squad.

Charlie's Angles: Geometry teacher Charlie puts together a crack squad of sexy mathematicians.

Raiders of the Lost Arf: Indiana Jones is out for vengeance when a gang of Nazis kidnap his dog, Sparky.

robeiae
07-01-2005, 11:40 PM
Baster and Commander: The Surprise's cook takes over the ship when everyone else drowns.

:Clap:
:ROFL:

Rob :)

Pat~
07-05-2005, 01:31 AM
Gone With the Wine--the story of AA

The Whining--the documentary of our family's cross-country road trip

The Mold Rush--the exciting life of a sorority refrigerator

Vatman--the documentary of my husband's venture into winemaking

Big Wish--an aspiring writer dreams of writing a blockbuster novel

eldragon
07-05-2005, 03:45 AM
Cat in the FAT
A new cooking show - for meat eaters only.


The Lizard of Oz
Not an old Kansas Boy.


The Brady Punch
Jan fights back.

Napoleon Dyno-mite
Jimmy Walker moves to Idaho.

Dinosaum
Nighttime relief for the extinct.

maestrowork
07-05-2005, 04:59 AM
Be Bitched
A prison story...

Herpes: Fully Loaded
Don't you just hate that Bug?

LENT
Double featured with Passion of the Christ

Writer2011
07-05-2005, 05:42 AM
Can't think of any...

rhymegirl
07-05-2005, 06:49 AM
The Lizard of Oz

Giant lizard terrorizes the wonderful land of Oz.

PAWS

Giant cat terrorizes a normally quiet summertime vacation spot.

SPIDERMAD

A giant spider goes mad, terrorizes a school full of kids.

PattiTheWicked
07-05-2005, 07:38 AM
The Two Tokers: While waiting for Frodo and Sam to return, Merry and Pippin get into Gandalf's bag of pipe-weed. Then they eat everything in sight.

Hogma: Rufus, the thirteenth apostle, teams up with Jay and Silent Bob again to escort the Scion to a pig roast.

Sex, Pies and Videotape: Kinky new ways to use canned pumpkin.

The Lostman: Kevin Costner's epic tale about a guy who just kinda walks around....

poetinahat
07-05-2005, 07:55 AM
Trainspitting - Uncouth Glaswegians have a gob of fun

Road Tripe - A perfectly offal film.

Leaving Las Vegans - Intrigue and angst at the no-meat taco shack

The Unbearable Lightness of Bing - Silken-voiced crooner having just too good a time

Patch Adam - Eve installs version 2.0

reph
07-05-2005, 07:58 AM
Rain Map
Documentary exposing guesswork at the National Weather Service.

brokenfingers
07-05-2005, 08:11 AM
Hadagascar - poignant story set in the near future when gas prices reach $100 a gallon and people are forced to walk to work.

White Boise - Explore the city of Boise, Idaho after the worst snowstorm of the century

The Adventures of Shark Bot and Java Girl - VoteBot's cousins use his name and influence to sell their tale to Hollywood. Hilarious hijinks ensue!

The Longest Yarn - It's the day after the Fourth of July and the boss has one helluva boring story to tell ya.

Rational Treasure - Yeah, it was only a rubber doll - but to him she was the world.

Kin City - mysterious doings in a typical southern town.

The Boogerman - watch Harold as he digs for gold in the most unlikeliest of places!

Leet the Fockers - one family singlehandedly revolutionizes the world with their cell phone text talk.

The Perfect Man - what? That title isn't funny enough as is?

Nicholas S.H.J.M Woodhouse
07-05-2005, 08:18 AM
When Saturday Combs - the story of Saturday, the boy who saw Jesus in his Uncle Friday's comb

reph
07-06-2005, 05:40 AM
They Shoo Horses, Don't They? – Back to the barn with you, Brownie!

Masa Blanca – Restaurant owner must deal with his yearning for the superb white corn flour he enjoyed in Paris.

PattiTheWicked
07-07-2005, 07:52 AM
Escape from New Dork: In a post-apocalyptic world, Snake Plissken has to fight his way off an island full of computer programmers, comic-book store owners, and late night RPGers.

Sad Max: Renegade cop Max is back, this time with much weeping and rending of garments.

Dante's Pear: The chick from Terminator teams up with Remington Steele when a 40-million-gallon vat of pear preserves threatens to engulf a small Washington town.

Flash of the Titans: Hera gets mad at Zeus again and moons everyone.

Sorry. Patti watched the Sci Fi channel last weekend.

poetinahat
07-07-2005, 08:02 AM
Okay, since we're having such fun being derivative here:

Show of hands - those in favour of a new thread: "Change one letter of an AW user's title"...

Never mind - going back in the box...

---

Lipshtick Traces - Historical and sociological analysis of 80's Glam rock and its origins in the traditions of Ziegfeld vaudeville

pianoman5
07-07-2005, 09:37 AM
Stat Wars: Rival groups of statisticians argue intemperately over each others' economic predictions.

Jews: A coastal community of movie industry executives is terrorised by a loan shark. (Dir: Mel Brooks)

Having Private Ryan: A G.I. develops an inappropriate crush on a fellow soldier.

Farto: Le Petomane tours North Dakota. What a gas!

Cool Hand Puke: An Antarctic masseur tries to eat fifty hard-boiled eggs.

Penman Shipp
07-13-2005, 12:33 PM
Angles in America : A gritty, no-holds-barred social commentary on the jarring emotional effects students suffer when faced with the guilt of being inept at geometry.

DragonHeart
07-14-2005, 05:03 PM
The Lion Kong
King Kong's cousin rampages through the African savanah.

Past Away
A thrilling account of an abandoned man's death.

The Norse Whisperer
The tale of a man who speaks to the Nordic people.

~DragonHeart~

poetinahat
08-17-2005, 05:08 AM
Divine Sucrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood - all that yakkin' gives a body a sore throat.

Dead Moets' Society - prep-school boys get drunk on Daddy's champers.

AdamH
08-17-2005, 08:11 AM
Bask to the Future - Marty and Doc Brown enjoying their retirement years laying on a beach while the royalties roll in from Doc's Delorean sales.

GhostButters - Slime becomes the hottest new toast topping.

Sight Club - The first rule of Sight Club is "Do not look directly at a solar eclipse". The second rule of Sight Club is "DO NOT LOOK DIRECTLY AT A SOLAR ECLIPSE."

Gord of the Rings - Gord likes onion rings...A LOT. This is his story for the perfect one.

Lice is Beautiful - It certainly is.

WVWriterGirl
08-17-2005, 08:56 AM
The Lostman: Kevin Costner's epic tale about a guy who just kinda walks around....

Is it just me, or does this sound a lot like the original plot of this movie?

The Cow - One bovine's struggle through death, resurrection and the lengths she'll go through for the bull she loves.

Pitch - Comedic yet instructional video for the pitching-impared.

Mold School - Heartwarming story of one janitor's fight against the insidious creeping menace, mold.

My Big Fat Creek Wedding - Hijinx and hilarity ensue when a Hatfield and McCoy plan the ultimate wedding!

Legally Bland - When not being fabulous is a crime, one woman takes the fight to be boring all the way to the Supreme Court.

Cueless - A movie where there's no script and no director; the actors just sort of...well...mill about.

~or~

Cueless - A boy's struggle to find his father's missing cue stick and begin a life of pool hustling (as suggested by my loving, well-meaning husband).

'Salem's Cot - One man's search for a decent bed in a southern penal system.

...And, one for the boob tube:

The Hick - An overall-clad superhero fights crime in an effort to clean up The City. "Spoon, ya'll!"

WVWG

poetinahat
09-08-2005, 11:49 AM
The Iman Who Wasn't There - David Bowie searches for his own Runaway Bride.

Stand By Mel - The fast-paced story of a Braveheart extra.

The Last Temptation of Chris - Annoying comedian Chris Elliot gets one final shot at TV: a talk show with Mike Tyson.

threedogpeople
09-08-2005, 11:02 PM
The Farty - Grandpa gasses the family at Thanksgiving Dinner

Fried Mean Tomatoes - Southern women with attitude

Hurl Harbor - Cruise ships ride out a tropical storm

It Lame from Above - better title for a bad movie

poetinahat
09-15-2005, 07:50 AM
Fahrenheit 411 - Michael Moore exposé on corrupt switchboard operators

Monsoon Weeding - Vignettes of an Indian family who garden in the worst weather

Blend it like Beckham - Kids follow their dreams to emulate their favorite superstar bartender

poetinahat
01-22-2006, 03:27 AM
First Wives' Clue - Goldie Hawn, in the conservatory, with the gardener...

WVWriterGirl
01-22-2006, 04:05 AM
War of the Words - Tom Cruise stars in this thriller about life-or-death debates between Humans and Aliens on the merits of Scientology.

robeiae
01-22-2006, 04:24 AM
Glade Runner-the high stakes business of air-freshener smuggling is revealed!

Rob :)

poetinahat
01-22-2006, 03:34 PM
Million Dollar Baba - poor, but determined girl from the wrong side of the tracks finds an unwilling, aging patissier to mentor her as she rises to the top of the male-dominated world of dessert chefs.

Eveningsdawn
01-23-2006, 07:43 AM
Brokeback Fountain - an epic love story featuring two gay geyser experts

Hoodpinked - Little Red Riding Hood puts a bit too much bleach in the wash.

My-Immortal
01-23-2006, 07:47 AM
Billion Dollar Baby - the story of Bill Gates offspring.

poetinahat
01-23-2006, 07:49 AM
... or Alice Cooper.

Sage
01-23-2006, 08:05 AM
Vulcano - Spock is unleashed on L.A.

Lord of the Sing - Like Lord of the Dance, but with hobbits, elves, dwarves, & a fellowship
-Fellowship of the Sing - Nine adventurers sing & dance their way across the land to get rid of a ring
-The Two-Twoers (bootlegged copy misspelling) - Though separated, the intrepid adventurers ballet dance in tutus their way though battles, forest, marsh, etc.
-Return of the Sing - Frodo accomplishes his mission, but this time with singing & dancing!

Buffy, the Vampire Layer - A cute blonde sleeps with a couple of vampires... oh, wait, that's the show. (I can make fun. I love the show)

BlackCrowesChick
01-23-2006, 09:20 AM
Girls Gone Wide - A documentary following former Girls Gone Wild stars who have gained five hundred pounds each.

September skies
01-23-2006, 11:03 AM
http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/EmoteROFL.gif I am literally in tears, laughing loudly....

ok, I'll try it too

Tortilla Soul - Comedy about Black and Mexican cooks in the kitchen

NonAir - documentary about lack of air

Flee Willy - a heartwarming and touching story about a young girl trying to get away from her coming-of-age boyfriend.

The Parent Crap - Lindsay Lohan blames parents for the way she turned out

The New Gay - The story of the latest tastes and styles of homosexual men

Meet the F*ckers - x-rated reality tv show

TheIT
01-31-2006, 03:51 AM
While we're at it, let's resurrect this thread, too. (Thanks, poetinahat!)

Pilates of the Carribean: The new exercise craze sweeping the Tropics!

poetinahat
01-31-2006, 03:57 AM
That one is worth posting twice!

Ton Cup - story about a slim golfer trying to make it on the John Daly Oversize Circuit.

robeiae
01-31-2006, 04:42 AM
Pop Gun-Tom Cruise plays a man who is unable to consummate his marriage.

Blaming Saddles-an expose on why cowboys cotten to manly love

TheIT
01-31-2006, 04:48 AM
Jung Frankenstein: Frankenstein's monster sees a psychiatrist to deal with issues of life after death.

Yeshanu
02-01-2006, 07:34 PM
The Return of the Kong

Peter Jackson's next film...

eldragon
02-01-2006, 07:45 PM
The Corpse Pride - A patriotic look at the after life.

arrowqueen
02-02-2006, 01:26 AM
'The man who would be Kong.' - A helpful guide to penile enlargement.

Yeshanu
02-02-2006, 02:47 AM
The Wreath of Kahn

Christmas decorating, Star Trek style.

TheIT
02-02-2006, 02:52 AM
Bunnie and Clyde: The Easter Bunny decides he's tired of handing out eggs and switches to robbing banks

TheIT
02-02-2006, 03:40 AM
Last in Space: A game of musical chairs gone horribly wrong

poetinahat
02-20-2006, 02:46 AM
Brokebank Mountain - Offbeat cowboy film hits the jackpot

MarkN
02-20-2006, 03:57 AM
Fantastic Flour - Reed Richards and his team of futuristic superheros team up to bake delicious breads and pastries

Jurassic Pork - A paleontologist and two kids are menaced by giant prehistoric hogs reconstructed from fossilized DNA.

Schindler's Fist - Schindler gets tired of hiding Jews, and just punches out any Nazi that tries to take them away.

Pulp Friction - Three amoral gangsters rub people the wrong way.

Forrest Grump - A young idiot grows up to be as cranky as he is stupid, and makes a fortune in talk radio.

poetinahat
02-21-2006, 09:23 AM
Sow Falling on Cedars - Crunch.

poetinahat
02-23-2006, 09:19 AM
Mrs. Henderson Resents - all those skinny little girls who know nothing about life or performance. After all, she's the one running the show...

poetinahat
02-23-2006, 09:21 AM
The Empire Strikes Beck - *hhhhohhhhh* We've heard "Loser" one too many times *hhhhohhhhh*

MarkN
02-23-2006, 04:21 PM
The Empire Strikes Buck - Bambi vs. Vader (a very short feature).

spike
02-23-2006, 05:29 PM
The Codfather--The boss of the fish market.

Appocolypse New-And improved!

Das Toot--Never serve beans on a submarine

Fin City--A secret society of Great White sharks

Annie H3ll--Diane Keaton makes everyone dress like a dweeb

The Deer Punter--A buck makes it big in the NFL

The Green Smile--A dentist's nightmare

Drain Man--A plumber's story

Fatman--Story of a contestant on the "Biggest Loser" show

poetinahat
02-24-2006, 07:57 AM
Return of the Jed - The Clampetts fix that Mr. Drysdale, but good.
thanks, trav, for the correction. It's been probably 20 years since I've seen a Star Wars film.

travNastee
02-24-2006, 09:43 AM
Navy Sears
A town revolts against the painting of their local discount center

John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mats
A man looks back on the traumatic events of his kindergarten nap time

Lady and The Trump
A woman tries to love Donald Trump for something other than his money (Spoiler: It doesn't work)

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Seth
Seth Green kills everyone involved in "Can't Hardly Wait"

Jarherd
A cowboy's life on the open range herding Mason jars.

no prob on the correction. In your defense, though, it was originally going to be called Revenge of the Jedi, but "Revenge is not a Jedi characteristic."

BlackCrowesChick
02-24-2006, 09:53 AM
Dr. Strangelove Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Boob - Hugh Hefner biopic

MarkN
02-24-2006, 04:29 PM
50 First Mates -- Drew Barrymore stars as an absent-minded naval HR admin who keeps filling the same req over and over.

Krill Bill, Vol. 1 -- Uma Thurman wants revenge on the guy who ate her shrimp cocktail.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mint -- Felix Unger takes over as the new Secretary of the Treasury and decides to do something about all that "filthy lucre."

School of Crock -- Jack Black stars as a tone-deaf substitute music teacher who tries to hide his disability by teaching his students the art of slow-cooking.

Secondhand Liens -- Haley Joel Osment spends a summer with his two eccentric uncles, buying up other people's mortgages and foreclosing on them. So that's how they got so rich!

BlackCrowesChick
02-28-2006, 09:31 AM
His Girdle Friday - Movie about a Friday shopping spree with RuPaul.

So I cheated and added two letters. It wouldn't look right spelled Girdl.