6 New Personality Disorders Caused by the Internet

jst5150 · Jul 1, 2009

This is the guy who makes a new thread, knowing he's just written the absolutely perfect post. A post that should be heralded across the Internet for its beauty, comedy and insight. It is such a good post that the guy is checking every five seconds to see if there is a new response. If he gets a response he quickly dashes out his own reply that will appear half a second later.

If there are no responses to his perfect post then he will wait an eternity of five minutes before replying to his own thread with, "What, nobody has a comment? Helloooo???"

and

These are the people who lurk around innocently enough, and then, one day, tragedy strikes. Their dog, or parent, or maybe a close friend died. Maybe the poster themselves found out they have a terminal disease. And unless you're on 4chan, the group will generally rally around and shower them with sympathy. You send this person your prayers and well wishes, maybe a few dozen kitten pictures and you hope they will get through it.

Then, a few months later, another tragedy strikes them. Their best friend was raped, or paralyzed in an accident, or both. A few months after that, their father dies. Again.

Great stuff. ETA: The entire article is fantastic.

http://www.cracked.com/article_17522_6-new-personality-disorders-caused-by-internet.html

scarletpeaches · Jul 1, 2009

I admit it. I'm a grammar Nazi. I'm just trying to heal the world with my superior word-majicks.

dnic · Jul 1, 2009

Awesome link.

jst5150 · Jul 1, 2009

You're just a Djinni in a bottle, right, SP?

Cassiopeia · Jul 1, 2009

You ever get the feeling we're being watched?

scarletpeaches · Jul 1, 2009

Cassiopeia said:
You ever get the feeling we're being watched?

Ahhhhh, but who is it?

dpaterso · Jul 1, 2009

Cassiopeia said:
You ever get the feeling we're being watched?

Or even worse -- you aren't being watched?!

-Derek

Cassiopeia · Jul 1, 2009

dpaterso said:
Or even worse -- you aren't being watched?!

-Derek

I always feel like somebody's watching me

KTC · Jul 1, 2009

scarletpeaches said:
I admit it. I'm a grammar Nazi. I'm just trying to heal the world with my superior word-MAGIC.

There. I fixed it for you.

KTC · Jul 1, 2009

jst5150 said:
You're just a Djinni in a bottle, right, SP?

There. I fixed it for you.

NeuroFizz · Jul 1, 2009

Scarlets jest jellous of are priddy riting.

Alpha Echo · Jul 1, 2009

That's hilarious! Love it.

KTC · Jul 1, 2009

NeuroFizz said:
Judas is just jealous of our pretty writing.

There. I fixed it for you.

Manix · Jul 1, 2009

I have to admit, this was really funny.

spamwarrior · Jul 1, 2009

That is so funny. On other places I've had people post something and then 5 seconds later say, "I guess no one cares about me. No one replied." I read the exchange between "Liz" and the poor other person... wow. Just wow.

Angie · Jul 1, 2009

KTC said:
There. I fixed it for you.

Thanks. Those were all really bothering me. Now would you please stop repeating yourself? You're being redundant, saying the same thing over and over again.

KTC · Jul 1, 2009

Angie said:
being redundant

Angie said:
saying the same thing over and over again.

One of these is not needed.

Angie · Jul 1, 2009

KTC said:
One of these is not needed.

Are you saying I should eliminate one; that I should cut it, snip it, remove it from my post? Is that what you are saying?

Angie · Jul 1, 2009

spamwarrior said:
I read the exchange between "Liz" and the poor other person... wow. Just wow.

Yeah.

"If I wanted you to call me by any other name, I would have offered that to you. I think it's rude when people don't even ask permission and take all sorts of liberties with your name. This is a real sore spot with me. My name has a lot of "nicknames" which I don't use. I use either my first name or my last name because I row with a lot of other women who share the same first name. Now, please do not ever call me by a nickname again."

*blink blink*

Soooo... Liz, Lizzie, Betty, Babs...how's it goin'? :ROFL:

icerose · Jul 1, 2009

The article was hilarious and it's funny how each of the examples certain people both in real life and online came to mind.

My grandmother-in-law and my aunt both have that fake a disease for attention. Or at the very least exaggerate it. Do NOT ask them how they've been, you'll never hear the end of all their aches and pains and how horrible it's been.

KTC · Jul 1, 2009

Okay...for the record...when I start an assbreakingly wicked and hilarious thread...I don't go running in to see if people are posting on it and wetting themselves over how funny it is. GAWD!

shut up

euclid · Jul 1, 2009

I licked this link. I'm NOT A GRAMMAR NAZI !!!! Anyone who says I am is a DIPWICK. I am, however an EXPERT at finding typos. In fact I'm so good at it that I could sell the service online. Any takers?

euclid · Jul 1, 2009

icerose said:
The article was hilarious and it's funny how each of the examples certain people both in real life and online came to mind.

My grandmother-in-law and my aunt both have that fake a disease for attention. Or at the very least exaggerate it. Do NOT ask them how they've been, you'll never hear the end of all their aches and pains and how horrible it's been.

Been there, done that, got the T-shirt (not with your relatives, obviously)

icerose · Jul 1, 2009

euclid said:
I licked this link. I'm NOT A GRAMMAR NAZI !!!! Anyone who says I am is a DIPWICK. I am, however an EXPERT at finding typos. In fact I'm so good at it that I could sell the service online. Any takers?

Was it yummy?

jst5150 · Jul 1, 2009

euclid said:
I licked this link ...

As did I. Started hallucinating. Thought the mouse was a brownie. Ate it.

6 New Personality Disorders Caused by the Internet

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