View Full Version : For those of you salivating over the iPhone (a poem)

06-10-2009, 12:12 AM
A good friend of mine put together a fantastic poem (here (http://cosmicben.livejournal.com/110335.html)). Reprinted with his permission.


I is for the Instant Grat,
the need to know right off the bat
who won the game,
which e-mails came.
It might not end up being the same
as last time, or the time before.
I'll check again, just to be sure.

P is for the Paucity
of life inside the battery,
which every other smartphone tops.
It drops and drops
and never stops.
It lasts for hours, just as long
as I don't turn the power on.

H is for the Hours in line,
with nothing 'round to pass the time.
Brav'd summer rains
and standing pains
and made imperceptible gains,
to make obs'lete one July day,
the model which I'd bought in May.

O comes twice after the one
when ev'ry billing period's done.
That's ten times ten,
again, again,
and all completely worth it when
I have my weather stats supplied
without the need to peek outside.

N is for No Internet,
which is often what I get,
under shadow, roof, and sky,
in subways low and buildings high,
and anywhere I vainly try.
Except that myth'cal 3G Zone
With room to fit me and my phone.

E is for the Endless apps,
which bring about with simple taps
everything that Apple hawks.
I check the time on foreign clocks,
and I could eas'ly track my stocks,
if I hadn't racked up debt,
financing Steve Jobs' private jet.

When strung together, not alone,
these letters six spell out IPHONE.
And Apple, Apple, burning dim,
on some base and capricious whim,
released this fearful acronym.
Despite it all, you'll soon find me
in line again for Version Three.

Storm Dream
06-10-2009, 01:37 AM
This is an awesome poem! And so, so true.

My friend picked up the $99 iPhone last night...I should send this to her. *g*

Can't really blame it for AT&T's horrible 3G network, though. My Blackjack II couldn't hold a call on it so I ended up turning it off. (On the plus side, battery now lasts way longer!)

06-10-2009, 02:59 AM
:roll: That was great! Love it. I totally do NOT want an iPhone, but my husband finally broke me down... he preordered the new one last night. Sigh.

06-10-2009, 09:26 AM
I'd love one, but my cheapie $20 disposable from Virgin is woefully underused. Even at $99, I can't justify the cost.

06-10-2009, 09:37 AM
That's excellent! Well-written, funny, and will possibly save me a thousand clams.

Your friend is talented, and you have good taste.