Do authors lose their friggin' minds, awaiting a response to their first submission?

I recently sent my first submission, a short (PARSEC) to hopefully "get credits" for when I start subbing my novels. There was a group of five or six of us from a critique site that subbed, and everyone else in the group already got their responses.

So, what's the first thing that comes to my mind? The wife didn't send it like she said she would. Damn her! She doesn't want me to be happy! She doesn't...Oh, wait, went on the site today and saw that "if you sent your submission snail mail instead of e-mail, you may not have reveived your response yet.

Now, I swear that wasn't on the site Friday. All it said was that every response had been sent out. Nevertheless, it scares me a little that conspiracy theories are the first thing that comes to my mind as I pace here like a caged lion awaitng my reply. WTF? It's a silly short, maybe the last one I'll write. And I need a damn sedative.

Is this how it was for everyone else?

Wayne K said:

You're assuming we have marbles to lose in the first place.

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Maybe if I find my marbles, I'll find my dignity in the same place.

Wayne K said:

Have you considered writng erotica?

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Is that some way to pass the time while you wait to hear about your sub?

Maybe I'll give it a shot and base some of it on personal experience. Here:

I plucked the lint and crusty peanut butter out of my belly button. Nothing but the best for my girl, Cherry. She wasn't the highest priced hooker in Martinsburg, but I was determined to show her a good time tonight. I found the underwear in the corner that was the lightest shade of tan and had the fewest holes, and yanked it up over my voluminous thighs. I only wished Cherry was here to see them quiver like egg jello. It always turned Fido on when my thighs did that, and I figured a woman is nothing more than a horny dog with tits. A couple splashes of Aqua Velva and I'd be ready.

Would you buy it? Did it turn you on?

Ah, came home to find my personalized rejection in the mail. She even told me why I didn't make the cut to the final review. As low start (which I knew and tried to work on, but apparently failed to fix), a simple but deadly plot hole (one of those, 'Oh crap, how'd I miss that?'), and bad formatting. Apparently, formatting really does matter when submitting. I'll have to work on that.

So, I'm no longer a virgin! I've been rejected! Now I'm off to fix the story and sub it other places. Wonder who's gonna get sloppy seconds.

Wayne K said:

One rejection closer to acceptance.

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Why is it that I was more eager to share it with the people on AW and in my critique circle, than with my family? I told the wife and she showed the apropriate amount of sympathy, but I feel closer to people over the eathernet than those who love me, in this instance. Pretty strange.