View Full Version : She's timely, I'll give her that

05-29-2009, 07:32 PM
No longer than it took for me to hit send on the last post, Melissa called and pretty much demanded my stance on the Catholic issue and wanted to know just what of Catholicism I understood. My reply was as follows:

St. Patrick was a leprechaun who drove away the snakes with pink hearts, yellow moons and green clovers. The natives of Ireland were so happy that they threw a big party with lots of mashed potatoes and gravy. Thusly, there was a potato famine and no one really cared because they were sick of potatoes. Jay Leno sent up some white smoke from something Smitty was toking on and Conan O'Brian is now Grand Poobah of Belfast.

I also demanded that I get to wear a pointy pope's hat at our wedding.

Me thinks Melissa may torture me with U2 music and Michael Flatley videos.

05-29-2009, 07:40 PM
Which last post? Melissa? Melissa who? Melissa Joan Hart? I wish they'd release more Clarissa Explains It All episodes on DVD.

05-29-2009, 07:41 PM
Don't forget the booze. It's not Catholicism without alcohol.

05-29-2009, 09:19 PM
Yikes, Rick. My sympathies. Have you considered getting premarital counseling at each church? There are dual religion marriages that are a success (Devil Ledbetter had a great post on your first thread, the one you're referring to above).

Good luck. (The atheist in me loves your answer to Melissa, although my guess she didn't catch the humor. Hope I'm wrong.)

05-29-2009, 09:29 PM
That response was supposed to be humorous?


I don't get it. Isn't that what Catholicism is?

Millicent M'Lady
05-29-2009, 09:43 PM
Don't go forgetting about the random unexplainable guilt about things that have nothing to do with you and that you had no hand in. Makes for some hilariously low self esteem...:D

05-30-2009, 01:49 AM
:ROFL: I'm sorry your answers are just funny and perfect. Hopefully your Melissa has a good sense of humor