need formerly desperate housewives

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Queenie

I'm writing an assigned article on ways to get out of the "desperate housewife" rut and have a life of your own. I'd love to hear how you carve out a little "me" time or are able to hold onto your own identity while acting as homestead manager, mother, finder of lost socks, etc.

Thanks, gang!
 

NitaHelpingHand

Formerly desperate housewife

I was a desperate housewife for many years and I would go hiking whenever I could -- all by myself. Not only do you enjoy the solitude, but it gives you time to think lots of things out, especially things that don't pertain to the kids and husband. Reminded me that I did indeed have a life outside of them. I would also take Saturdays or Sundays when their father was home to meet friends for lunch, or even occasionally for dinner. Twice a year I made it a point to have a night out with the girls -- dinner, dancing, drinking (but not too much!). Staying connected to your friends is very important. As the kids got a little older, I had dinner with 2 of my girlfriends every other week. It was wonderful and it always gave me something to look forward to!
 

Susan in Houston

Find something that's just yours

When I was in that situation I had to find something that was in no way connected to family. Something where I could be noticed just for myself, not as someone's mother, wife, etc. I chose breeding and showing dogs. I attended dog shows and training for showing. It took me entirely away (physically as well as mentally) from being a "housewife".
 

mskatmoon

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I too love to hike

I love going on hikes, just me (and the camera!). I especially love off trail hikes and do them a lot. Although my body isn't as fit as I'd like it to be. Arthritis is starting to set into my knees. But moving like that off trail seems to get that better.

I like to go out with my still single best friend and party sometimes. We go clubbing and dancing.

It's certainly hard to get out sometimes. I have a hard time convincing myself that I am not being too selfish. There are times my fiance "makes" me get out and do things. He's always telling me to take a drive somewhere while he takes care of the housework and kids. He's such a nice man.

Before I met him, I became irritable quite often with being "just" a housewife. But I was in an abuse situation. When I got out of that situation I tried to get out of that "stuck" feeling. But it has taken a long time to get away from that. But I am getting better at seeing that if I do not take care of myself how they heck can I take care of others!
 
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