The Five Traits a Woman Should Have Before You Get Serious

Seaclusion · Mar 11, 2009

You know what this is in response to. Feel free to add your own.

#1 She should have her own goals and direction and not rely on you to be the everything in her life. If she doesn't, she's going to cling to you like a sandspur and smother every bit of life you once had.

#2 She shouldn't whine and cry to get her way. Not only will the sound of her voice eventually make you cringe, you'll wind up going to see chick flicks, shopping for purses, and eating salads at foofoo restaurants.

#3 She doesn't want to change you. Any woman who starts out in the relationship with the idea that she can change you is going to take your friends away, your sports away, and your self esteem (you know what I mean) away.

#4 She should be open and honest from the start. You don't want to be five years into a relationship when you find out about how she paid her way through college as a stripper or anything more than 30 min into it when you learn that the trip to Scandinavia was not to earn foreign study credits.

#5 She should be able to support herself (and you if times get rough). You don't want to be with her if she relied on daddy all her life to support her, get her out of trouble, and make her decisions for her. If she has, you'll wind up paying for it for the rest of your life.

Richard (complaints should be directed to the management)

James81 · Mar 11, 2009

Heh, I thought this was going to be a BS list for teh funnah.

But that's an excellent list. Good work, chap.

Seaclusion · Mar 11, 2009

James81 said:
Heh, I thought this was going to be a BS list for teh funnah.

But that's an excellent list. Good work, chap.

Damn. I was trying to be irreverent.

Richard

MelodyO · Mar 11, 2009

Great, this also proves I'm almost the perfect woman. I do depend on my husband to support me and our kids, and in return he gets to run his own business and have a family, neither of which he could do very easily without me. It's a calculated risk on both our parts.

::meanders away to find out what caused this post in the first place::

Joe270 · Mar 11, 2009

anything more than 30 min into it when you learn that the trip to Scandinavia was not to earn foreign study credits

rhymegirl · Mar 11, 2009

Seaclusion said:
You don't want to be five years into a relationship when you find out about how she paid her way through college as a stripper...

What's wrong with that?

Seaclusion · Mar 11, 2009

rhymegirl said:
What's wrong with that?

Nothing until you're sitting a bar someday and a guy walks up to your date and tells all about what she did on stage and how great the lapdance was.

Richard

Beach Bunny · Mar 11, 2009

Seaclusion said:
You know what this is in response to. Feel free to add your own.

#1 She should have her own goals and direction and not rely on you to be the everything in her life. If she doesn't, she's going to cling to you like a sandspur and smother every bit of life you once had.

#2 She shouldn't whine and cry to get her way. Not only will the sound of her voice eventually make you cringe, you'll wind up going to see chick flicks, shopping for purses, and eating salads at foofoo restaurants.

#3 She doesn't want to change you. Any woman who starts out in the relationship with the idea that she can change you is going to take your friends away, your sports away, and your self esteem (you know what I mean) away.

#4 She should be open and honest from the start. You don't want to be five years into a relationship when you find out about how she paid her way through college as a stripper or anything more than 30 min into it when you learn that the trip to Scandinavia was not to earn foreign study credits.

#5 She should be able to support herself (and you if times get rough). You don't want to be with her if she relied on daddy all her life to support her, get her out of trouble, and make her decisions for her. If she has, you'll wind up paying for it for the rest of your life.

Richard (complaints should be directed to the management)

Now, where do I find a man who wants a woman like that?

rhymegirl · Mar 11, 2009

Seaclusion said:
Nothing until you're sitting a bar someday and a guy walks up to your date and tells all about what she did on stage and how great the lapdance was.

Richard

Well, it was in the past.

You could just say, "I don't know what you're talking about, buddy. You must have the wrong person."

Smish · Mar 11, 2009

Seaclusion said:
Nothing until you're sitting a bar someday and a guy walks up to your date and tells all about what she did on stage and how great the lapdance was.

Richard

Apparently, she doesn't have student loans, though, so that's in keeping with your standards for #5.

Men... they're unreasonable, aren't they?

Seaclusion · Mar 11, 2009

Beach Bunny said:
Now, where do I find a man who wants a woman like that?

Hanging out at the Salvation Army?

Richard

brokenfingers · Mar 11, 2009

This thread pretty much sums it up nicely:

http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=125667

maestrowork · Mar 11, 2009

#1 independent - clinginess is the kiss of death for me

#2 Can beat the crap out of you but chooses not to

#3 Great sense of humor and not get offended by the silliest things. Self-deprecating is a bonus. Don't be petty -- that's another kiss of death for me.

#4 R.E.S.P.E.C.T. - to self and to others... that includes trust, kindness, and all that

#5 Intelligent - nothing is more boring than a dumb person, no matter how cute she is. At least learn how to carry on a meaningful conversation

#6 Sexy - and I don't mean just beautiful or Playboy bunnies type. I mean the whole shebang: confidence, charisma, openmindedness, knows her body, knows how to use her body, the art of seduction and all that

maestrowork · Mar 11, 2009

Seaclusion said:
Nothing until you're sitting a bar someday and a guy walks up to your date and tells all about what she did on stage and how great the lapdance was.

Richard

I still don't know how that matters. Sorry, a past is a past, unless she's still a stripper and you have trouble with her career choices now -- then you talk about it, but not outright reject it. I mean, it's no different than meeting her ex-boyfriend and he goes into gory details of what a sex kitten she was with him or finding out she's had 14 relationships before she met you... so what?

Let it go, man.

Seaclusion · Mar 11, 2009

maestrowork said:
#6 Sexy - and I don't mean just beautiful or Playboy bunnies type. I mean the whole shebang: confidence, charisma, openmindedness, knows her body, knows how to use her body, the art of seduction and all that

I agree. I'll take the shebang everytime.

Richard

brokenfingers · Mar 11, 2009

Seaclusion said:
Nothing until you're sitting a bar someday and a guy walks up to your date and tells all about what she did on stage and how great the lapdance was.

Richard

Hmmm, I've dated many strippers and never had this happen. And if any guy had been foolish enough to do that, he'd learn the meaning of the word "tact".

Also, it swings both ways. Guys can have a past their wives don't approve of either but they're expected to leave it in the past. For instance, if he's an infamous womanizer who's well known locally.

maestrowork · Mar 11, 2009

brokenfingers said:
Also, it swings both ways. Guys can have a past their wives don't approve of either but they're expected to leave it in the past. For instance, if he's an infamous womanizer who's well known locally.

Or a male stripper who worked at gay clubs on the weekends.

It think people put too much emphasis on the past. If I want to date a saint, Mother Teresa isn't available.

James81 · Mar 11, 2009

rhymegirl said:
What's wrong with that?

9 times out of 10 they tend to be batshit crazy and have a whole list of unresolved issues that drove them to do it in the first place.

cray · Mar 11, 2009

maestrowork said:
#1 independent - clinginess is the kiss of death for me

#2 Can beat the crap out of you but chooses not to

#3 Great sense of humor and not get offended by the silliest things. Self-deprecating is a bonus. Don't be petty -- that's another kiss of death for me.

#4 R.E.S.P.E.C.T. - to self and to others... that includes trust, kindness, and all that

#5 Intelligent - nothing is more boring than a dumb person, no matter how cute she is. At least learn how to carry on a meaningful conversation

#6 Sexy - and I don't mean just beautiful or Playboy bunnies type. I mean the whole shebang: confidence, charisma, openmindedness, knows her body, knows how to use her body, the art of seduction and all that

qw repped me to ask about #5.
he's not clear on what that means?

Seaclusion · Mar 11, 2009

maestrowork said:
I still don't know how that matters. Sorry, a past is a past, unless she's still a stripper and you have trouble with her career choices now -- then you talk about it, but not outright reject it. I mean, it's no different than meeting her ex-boyfriend and he goes into gory details of what a sex kitten she was with him or finding out she's had 14 relationships before she met you... so what?

Let it go, man.

Would you still feel the same way if I had said 'Street prostitute'?

Richarde

dpaterso · Mar 11, 2009

Seaclusion said:
Would you still feel the same way if I had said 'Street prostitute'?

Man, this could'a been a funny thread! But they always go nose down after a short time.

-Derek

Toothpaste · Mar 11, 2009

I'd like to add one to the guy list but it was inspired from this one.

#Whatever - A guy who understands that despite the unfortunate title "Chick Flick" there can still be some quality films that get shoved under that moniker and who is confident enough in his sexuality and self to be able to admit to liking said films instead of disrespecting an entire genre based on its poorest examples.

Seriously, there is nothing sexier than a guy who isn't keen on supporting gender stereotypes.

ETA: I should add that aside from the Chick Flick reference, I think both lists posted are very awesome and I wholeheartedly agree.

Wayne K · Mar 11, 2009

I'm calling shenanigans because it doesn't mention avatars.

Wayne K · Mar 11, 2009

maestrowork said:
Or a male stripper who worked at gay clubs on the weekends.
.

I've done that and I've worked at womens clubs, and I think it should go in the plus column.

Anyone who thinks strippers are idiots don't know that these women are taking home a couple of hundred to a couple of thousand dollars a night. They go home with a unrequited woody and have to explain where the paycheck went. Uh-huh.

James81 · Mar 11, 2009

Toothpaste said:
#Whatever - A guy who understands that despite the unfortunate title "Chick Flick" there can still be some quality films that get shoved under that moniker and who is confident enough in his sexuality and self to be able to admit to liking said films instead of disrespecting an entire genre based on its poorest examples.

I like sort of the opposite thing about girls. A girl who is into geeky movies is a turn on. But ONLY if she is really into them. There's nothing more horrid and more of a turn off than a girl who pretends to like guy things just because she knows that's what guys like.

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