An endless night of the demon baby. . . What was wrong with her?

My brother had a night like that with his baby... he finally figured out that the kid was cold. Soon as he wrapped the baby up in a thick blanket and put a hat on, the baby was fine.

Don't know if that's what happened with yours. Could have been a tummy ache, too.

Have fun! ;-)

Ah, you have my sympathy.
When my lad was born I tried breastfeeding but I just wasn't producing enough. As a consequence my nipples were in shreds.
We were lucky, we lived in England at the time and so we could phone the maternity unit at 3.00 in the morning and get advice.
Their advice was to switch entirely over to formula. It worked like a charm because we knew how much Nat was getting.
Did you burp Alayna after she fed? She could have indigestion. You should really get her to burp before you lay her back down again.

Well, her liver is immature. The medicines your wife received in the hospital take several days to clear the baby's system. She could have had a hangover. You'll have a few days and nights like this for the next several weeks.

firedrake said:

Ah, you have my sympathy.
When my lad was born I tried breastfeeding but I just wasn't producing enough. As a consequence my nipples were in shreds.
We were lucky, we lived in England at the time and so we could phone the maternity unit at 3.00 in the morning and get advice.
Their advice was to switch entirely over to formula. It worked like a charm because we knew how much Nat was getting.

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You've got it backwards. It's not low milk supply that leads to shredded nipples. Nipples in shreds are a sure sign the baby isn't properly latched on - usually because it's sucking at the nipple rather than fully latched at the breast. An improperly latched baby will not get enough milk, which in turn causes a reduction in milk supply. The more the baby nurses, the more milk you make, and vice versa. This is why it's possible to nurse twins and even triplets, and why formula feeding causes reduction in milk supply.

It's very easy to tell if a breastfed baby is getting enough milk. Just count diapers. Five or six wet diapers and a couple of poopies in 24 hours is plenty for a newborn. It's actually a more accurate measure than looking at empty bottles because the empty bottle never accounts for how much the baby spits up.

Babies typically go through milk demand spurts at a few days (5 is typical), around 3 weeks, 6 weeks, etc. This is where they seems "never satisfied" and demand to nurse "all day" for 24 -48 hours. In this way, they force an increase in milk supply - unless they are given formula at these times. When this happens, the mother's milk supply doesn't increase, baby never seems satisfied at the breast and mom decides she "can't" make enough milk.

Underthecity, please, please, please have your wife contact your local La Leche League leader. These volunteers help new mothers with breastfeeding and are wonderfully supportive. I was an LLL leader for 5 years. (Yep, despite my avatar I am female.)

The first few days of breastfeeding are usually the hardest. The absolute best thing for increasing milk production is to just get in bed with baby, rest and relax and let her nurse, nurse, nurse. Milk is made when mom is at rest. Stress inhibits milk production and the let-down reflex. What you can do for your wife is take care of everything else (diapers, laundry, meals, visitors, shopping, errands) so she can relax and nurse while she and baby get the hang of it.

Best of luck to you!

Yes, the first couple of days breastfeeding can be rough. Check the diapers, as DL said. Five to six mean she's getting enough.

The thing is to be patient. The other thing is not to obsess over it. Occasionally a mother isn't able to produce enough. That happened to me with one of my children. Don't let your wife make herself miserable over it if that happens.

I heartily agree to bringing a helper from the La Leche League. They can help set your mind at ease. I had to do that and she was able to help with one who had trouble latching. It's a nipple-saver. Trust me on this.

Some nights are just rough and there never is a good answer. Some babies are gassy and colicky. Some have a "fussy" period of the day. Just hang in there and don't feel guilty about snatching sleep whenever you can. Naps can keep you from losing your mind.

Don't have a baby myself but I remember when my youngest sister was a newborn. I was five and insisted on being responsible and helping mom out with the kid (including waking up at night to help with the feedings - I was such a cute kid, if I may say so myself ). Sometimes my sister would be impossible and freak my parents out.

Eventually we figured out that sometimes she had gas or a tummy ache, and this one time there was a tag in her jammies that hurt her back when she was lying down, and the only way she was comfortable was being held. Mom couldn't breastfeed but being in that position is instinctively comforting, especially with a nipple in the mouth even if they aren't actually nursing (much). At least, that's my reckoning
Or maybe baby Alayna just needed comfort for no particular reason. That happens too I hear.

Devil Ledbetter said:

Babies typically go through milk demand spurts at a few days (5 is typical), around 3 weeks, 6 weeks, etc. This is where they seems "never satisfied" and demand to nurse "all day" for 24 -48 hours. In this way, they force an increase in milk supply - unless they are given formula at these times. When this happens, the mother's milk supply doesn't increase, baby never seems satisfied at the breast and mom decides she "can't" make enough milk.

Underthecity, please, please, please have your wife contact your local La Leche League leader. These volunteers help new mothers with breastfeeding and are wonderfully supportive. I was an LLL leader for 5 years. (Yep, despite my avatar I am female.)

The first few days of breastfeeding are usually the hardest. The absolute best thing for increasing milk production is to just get in bed with baby, rest and relax and let her nurse, nurse, nurse. Milk is made when mom is at rest. Stress inhibits milk production and the let-down reflex. What you can do for your wife is take care of everything else (diapers, laundry, meals, visitors, shopping, errands) so she can relax and nurse while she and baby get the hang of it.

Best of luck to you!

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Ah yes! Such great advice. Gauging by ounces of formula down the hatch is very misleading. Did you know a newborn's stomach is the size of a cherry? You can't put ounces and ounces in. A tiny bit is 'enough'.

She will seem to be nursing almost constantly, and that's good, if a little counter to those gurgly, contented six month olds they show on formula commercials.

Do call La Leche League. They are wonderful and will halve your frustrations in the first phonecall.

She's a demon. As soon as the new baby smell wears off either get her a job or sell her to gypsies. I'll take her if you want. If you meet the family first you'll know she's in experienced hands. Hell, you can just meet my mom...

My baby had an underdeveloped stomach and would scream constantly... I couldn't breastfeed. never made milk (freak of nature is what I am.. ) but the only formula the kid could drink was the caviar of formula -- Alimentum (something like that) and as soon as we found the formula he was a completely different baby.. I'd be up all night holding him as he screamed. Boy I thought I'd never survive it.

but we tried every thing.. hang in there.. could've just been a touch of colic too.

I think she just had gas.

To me, the combination of breast milk and formula, maybe not a good idea. I think they can tolerate breast milk much better. But some moms do have trouble achieving enough milk flow. I'd pick one or the other.

Welcome to parenthood and the daily puzzle of why is my baby crying now!

Were her clothes bothering her? Do you have a swing or something that vibrates or plays music? We love SNL in this house so thats always a plus for us

rhymegirl said:

I think she just had gas.

To me, the combination of breast milk and formula, maybe not a good idea. I think they can tolerate breast milk much better. But some moms do have trouble achieving enough milk flow. I'd pick one or the other.

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Breastmilk is better tolerated than formula, but it's not an either/or proposition. There is no medical reason to abruptly wean when giving formula - although giving formula often leads to unintentional weaning.

The baby getting formula and some breastmilk is better off than the baby getting no breastmilk at all.

As heart braking as it is also you might have to give up breast formula. I couldn't I delivered too early and wasn't producing like I needed to for my child. It sounds like that's all the baby wants and she's not getting enough. If you move her completely to formula she will forget about breast milk

The good news is that you'll live through this.

The bad news is that someday soon, she'll be asking you for the car keys.

jubileerocker said:

As heart braking as it is also you might have to give up breast formula. I couldn't I delivered too early and wasn't producing like I needed to for my child. It sounds like that's all the baby wants and she's not getting enough. If you move her completely to formula she will forget about breast milk

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I understand that some people can't breastfeed for whatever reason, and I don't judge. But advising others to ditch breastfeeding at the first hint of difficulty is irresponsible. You have no idea whether his baby is "getting enough," and crying isn't necessarily any indication that she isn't. Babies cry for reasons other than hunger. Furthermore, if she is hungry, it's more breastfeeding that will bring her mother's milk supply up to speed - giving formula will do the exact opposite.

Yes, if they "move her completely to formula" she'll indeed "forget about breastmilk." And they can also forget about the many, well-documented health (and budgetary) advantages breastfeeding offers.

Also, there is no such thing as "breast formula."

All this is normal--as everyone mentions above. With my first son, it was a non-stop screaming fest for three months straight. It was very trying and emotionally draining, but he was fine. There's hardly anything more difficult to go through than a baby who is clearly unhappy but mommy and daddy can't fix it. Patience is key. Babies pick up on your anxiety and it will make them even more restless.

Patience. This will pass. I promise it's not forever.

When Daniel was going through it, all anyone ever told me was that it was colic. Colic--the mysterious ailment. My deductions told me that it was an immature digestive system. He had painful gas, and his little body simply wasn't used to processing milk yet. They are having a constant stream of brand new sensations and it seems to be overwhelming for them sometimes. Eating is new, food in the body is new, gas is new and pain (hunger or digestion issues) is definitely new. Before birth, they're just floating around all peaceful like and then out of the blue they are bombarded with all this new stuff. Swaddling is great. It keeps them feeling secure and warm.

All I can say is patience. That, and make sure you and mommy give each other plenty of time away from baby to recover emotionally from the crying jags. It's hard at first, but it will pass.

If it's really breastfeeding issues, there is nothing wrong with not being able to breastfeed. And sometimes it takes babies a little while to get the hang of it. If it just doesn't work, then give her a bottle and be happy that she is eating. Again--there is absolutely nothing wrong with bottle feeding. Baby won't suffer for it. Let me say that again--Baby will not suffer from formula. Millions of babies have been bottle fed with formula, and they did just fine. Breastfeeding is wonderful, sure. But do not let anyone make you or your wife feel "less than" if it's not possible. My mother wasn't able to breastfeed. I did, but only for three months with each of my boys. I gained well and developed exactly like I was supposed to on formula. My boys gained well and developed exactly like they were supposed to on formula. Breast or bottle, it's really not a life-altering decision for baby.

Also, has anyone mentioned that mommy might get what they call the blues? Right now, it's just about time for them to start. Her hormones will be all wonky for a while, so don't be surprised if she starts weeping when all you said to her was, "Have you seen the TV remote?"

Four days old is still really little, the first six weeks of breastfeeding are turbulent at the best of times. Don't fret about mixed feeding, if your wife wants to, she can go back to exclusively breastfeeding. To throw another perspective on this, your baby has been cosy inside her mummy for nine months, to then be alone in a moses basket can be a shock! If you feel up to it, cosleeping (done safely) can help alot and during the daytime (and indeed evening when they're wee), slings can be amazing. We wouldn't have survived without our mei tai.

Meant to add, the La Leche League website has some great info on their answer pages, i found alot of solace there. http://www.llli.org/nb.html

Devil Ledbetter said:

It's not low milk supply that leads to shredded nipples. Nipples in shreds are a sure sign the baby isn't properly latched on - usually because it's sucking at the nipple rather than fully latched at the breast. An improperly latched baby will not get enough milk, which in turn causes a reduction in milk supply. The more the baby nurses, the more milk you make, and vice versa.

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Yes, exactly. That was the first thing I was told after giving birth. They showed me how to make sure my baby was latched on the right way and it didn't hurt.

Might want to watch consistently holding the baby until she goes to sleep. You start making that a habit and it's all you'll be doing. lol

What i used to do sometimes, instead of just holding my kids to put them to sleep, was I'd lay them in their crib and stand there with them and rub the tops of their eyes. That always worked really well.

And it just sounds like she was hungry man. Get you some milocon (sp?) drops too. Sometimes they get gassy and that pisses em off.

There's gonna be lots of nights like this, so from this point forward grab sleep WHENEVER you can. lol

Yep, those first six weeks can be very difficult. My boys were both early and spent their first few weeks feeding for 20 minutes, sleeping for 40, pretty much around the clock. It's difficult, but can be done if everyone pulls their weight. I co-slept with my babies and my husband slept in another room so he could be fresh for work and driving around; I was at home all day so slept when my babies slept, and then spent the rest of the day nursing them!

I'm biased in favour of breastfeeding because my boys both did so very well on it (and both fed long-term): but really, this is your baby and you need to find a way that makes you all happy. Just bear in mind that breastfeeding gets easier the longer you do it, and tiny newborn mouths can struggle to latch on, hence the sore nipples. In a week or two it'll be easier, and in a month or two you'll wonder what was so difficult about it.

Meanwhile, just keep going, and you and your wife remember to be kind to each other. Having a new baby--particularly the first--can be very hard work, and very stressful, no matter how gorgeous she is.

Old Hack said:

In a week or two it'll be easier, and in a month or two you'll wonder what was so difficult about it.

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In a month or so, you'll have that blessed hindsight and see that a couple of weeks, as nightmarish as they feel while you're doing it, are just a phase. Breastfeeding is far healthier, thousands of dollars cheaper, and vastly more convenient than bottle feeding.

All chances are that your wife is perfectly capable of breastfeeding. The next ten days will be nothing but that and sleeping. It feels crazy, but it's so temporary. Write off the next ten days to insanity and sleeping at all hours of the day, but feeling like none, and you'll come out the other side a set of parents and a regular, ole baby.