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underthecity
02-10-2009, 10:27 PM
I did a google search for this, but I need a more specific answer.

My wife's due date is March 1. Yesterday she said she was feeling gas pains all day, but today not so much.

She said it was time for me to wash some of the baby clothes in Dreft and put the baby seat in.

What does this mean? Is the baby coming this week?

Cranky
02-10-2009, 10:29 PM
Labor pains can feel like almost anything, and I'm sure she'll have a few false alarms. I hate to drag out this old saying, but she really will know when it's "the real deal". :D

Sounds to me like she is nesting, which can go on for quite awhile. I was scrubbing my miniblinds with a toothbrush three weeks before my third one was born.

And first babies are often late.

CaroGirl
02-10-2009, 10:30 PM
I did a google search for this, but I need a more specific answer.

My wife's due date is March 1. Yesterday she said she was feeling gas pains all day, but today not so much.

She said it was time for me to wash some of the baby clothes in Dreft and put the baby seat in.

What does this mean? Is the baby coming this week?
Tell your wife labour pains feel like menstrual cramps, magnified. Sometimes accompanied by back pain. I don't think labour would be confused with gas pain.

Your baby will be born in two days, at 4:46 pm. :)

firedrake
02-10-2009, 10:30 PM
She probably has indigestion, it happens a lot in later stages of pregnancy. Just about everything I ate gave me heartburn.

Labour pains are more like period pains and will be regularly spaced.

Cranky
02-10-2009, 10:31 PM
She probably has indigestion, it happens a lot in later stages of pregnancy. Just about everything I ate gave me heartburn.

Labour pains are more like period pains and will be regularly spaced.

They'll also get stronger and closer together when it's labor, too. :)

mscelina
02-10-2009, 10:31 PM
Do the pains make her scream, call you names and threaten to kill you as soon as she can get out of the bed to wrap her hands around your throat? No?

Then it's not time yet.

Gas can be very painful both before and after labor. It's important for her to walk her way through those gas pains. It'll relieve the pain and the gas and she'll be much happier.

CaroGirl
02-10-2009, 10:32 PM
Labor pains can feel like almost anything, and I'm sure she'll have a few false alarms. I hate to drag out this old saying, but she really will know when it's "the real deal". :D

Sounds to me like she is nesting, which can go on for quite awhile. I was scrubbing my miniblinds with a toothbrush three weeks before my third one was born.

And first babies are often late.
My first baby was 3 1/2 weeks early, my second was on time. So, go figure; probably one of those "inexact science" things.

CaroGirl
02-10-2009, 10:34 PM
Oh, here's a tip: If clear water gushes out onto the floor between her legs, it's probably a good idea to go to the hospital.

Cranky
02-10-2009, 10:34 PM
My first baby was 3 1/2 weeks early, my second was on time. So, go figure; probably one of those "inexact science" things.

Yep. My very first child was born two weeks early as well. :)

Devil Ledbetter
02-10-2009, 10:44 PM
Tell your wife labour pains feel like menstrual cramps, magnified. Sometimes accompanied by back pain. I don't think labour would be confused with gas pain.

Yes. And the best advice my doula gave me was "when you're really in labor, you'll know." If you have to ask "is it labor?" chances are excellent that it's not.

Sure, there will always be a few women who have no idea they're in labor. But for most, active labor is incredibly intense and not easily confused with the niggling aches, pains and indigestion of pregnancy.

Stew21
02-10-2009, 10:56 PM
The majority of my labor pains with my first were in my back/ front with my second, but there was no mistaking labor with either of my kids.

Perks
02-10-2009, 10:58 PM
Whatever you do, do not buy into the baby-is-imminent mode. It will make these last few weeks take forever. It'll also have you poised to agree if the doctor says "let's go ahead and induce". I am hugely against inductions in all but very certain circumstances. First babies often take longest. Keep looking at that third week of March. Then, you won't be disappointed.

Devil Ledbetter
02-10-2009, 11:03 PM
Whatever you do, do not buy into the baby-is-imminent mode. It will make these last few weeks take forever. It'll also have you poised to agree if the doctor says "let's go ahead and induce". I am hugely against inductions in all but very certain circumstances. First babies often take longest. Keep looking at that third week of March. Then, you won't be disappointed.Good advice. They usually come when they're ready, and going into labor naturally rather than forcing the body into it generally results in a less hairy experience.

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:06 PM
Good advice. They usually come when they're ready, and going into labor naturally rather than forcing the body into it generally results in a less hairy experience.

I dunno. I had two inductions and two where I went into labor naturally. The latter two were more hairy -so to speak- than the other two.

It does vary wildly, the whole experience.

Pitocin is a tool of the devil, though, I will say. Gawd, it was awful.

CaroGirl
02-10-2009, 11:08 PM
Pitocin is a tool of the devil, though, I will say. Gawd, it was awful.
Quoted for truth.

WendyNYC
02-10-2009, 11:08 PM
I dunno. I had two inductions and two where I went into labor naturally. The latter two were more hairy -so to speak- than the other two.

It does vary wildly, the whole experience.

Pitocin is a tool of the devil, though, I will say. Gawd, it was awful.

Not for me--Pitocin helped a potentially dangerous labor progress and end quickly. But yes, I've heard horror stories.

Yeshanu
02-10-2009, 11:09 PM
Oh, here's a tip: If clear water gushes out onto the floor between her legs, it's probably a good idea to go to the hospital.

Yep.

I never really went into labour, even when induced, and my three kids were all born by c-section.

But the water breaking can't possibly be mistaken for anything else, even at four in the morning.

And if she comes to you at four in the morning and says, "It's time to go to the hospital," do yourself a favour, and don't ask, "Are you sure?" :D

Perks
02-10-2009, 11:10 PM
In all but the most extreme cases, the longer that baby bakes, the better off you'll all be. Full term babies (and I don't mean 40 weeks; I mean when that hormone cocktail brews just right and both mother's and baby's body realize it's time to do this thing) are easier to soothe and nurse and they sleep better than babies evicted before they were quite ready.

Allen, you and your wife won't be able to appreciate the full significance of this post until, I'm guessing, the last week of March, when you're out of gas, physically and emotionally.

Perks
02-10-2009, 11:11 PM
Pitocin is a tool of the devil, though, I will say. Gawd, it was awful.And quoted again for truth. If you're bleeding to death, it could save your life. Other than that, stay away from it.

ETA - Or unless you have a situation, a la Miss Wendy up there, where it's important. Doctors often act like the stuff is made of tic tacs and aspirin, though. It's not. It's serious medicine. And very unpleasant.

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:13 PM
Not for me--Pitocin helped a potentially dangerous labor progress and end quickly. But yes, I've heard horror stories.

Fair enough. Sorry Wendy. It was truly awful for me, but then again, I'm really sensitive to most types of medication...I think my reactions are a bit, er, amplified? I dunno.

But if someone can avoid using it, I highly recommend doing so. With my last, the pain was so bad I gave myself bruises on my forehead from banging my head against the bedrails so that I wouldn't scream. Yikes.

JennaGlatzer
02-10-2009, 11:14 PM
I dunno... I had no idea I was in labor. (As you might remember, seeing as how I posted it here. ;) ) Got to the hospital and they told me I was having contractions 3 minutes apart. And my water didn't break like it does in the movies... it just kind of leaked for a few days, which is why I didn't realize I was in labor. (It didn't get painful until my water "really" broke.)

I know this is different from many, but I'm glad I was in the hospital the whole time. It took away the whole, "Should I go now? Is it time? What if...?" thinking. I was fine there, watching American Idol and bouncing around on my birthing ball. My friend gave birth in a car because she did wait too long (very rare).

NeuroFizz
02-10-2009, 11:14 PM
Can't speak from experience, but I doubt the Guinness Book of World Records has anything about laying a 7lb, 6oz turd.

Perks
02-10-2009, 11:15 PM
But if someone can avoid using it, I highly recommend doing so. With my last, the pain was so bad I gave myself bruises on my forehead from banging my head against the bedrails so that I wouldn't scream. Yikes.
Oh yeah. I went from zen-woman to climbing the walls and yowling like a dog in a trap in fifteen minutes, because the doctors said it was "hospital policy" that I have the pitocin at that point. (Which turned out to be an utter nonsense.)

Perks
02-10-2009, 11:17 PM
My friend gave birth in a car because she did wait too long (very rare).It's amazing when that happens. 'Precipitous births' they're called. And when that happens to a full term baby, it almost always means that everything is lined up just exactly optimally and you'll have a mess on your hands, but a healthy baby and a great story.

And a really cheap hospital bill!

WendyNYC
02-10-2009, 11:17 PM
And quoted again for truth. If you're bleeding to death, it could save your life. Other than that, stay away from it.

ETA - Or unless you have a situation, a la Miss Wendy up there, where it's important. Doctors often act like the stuff is made of tic tacs and aspirin, though. It's not. It's serious medicine. And very unpleasant.

I'll agree with that. It makes contractions terribly, terribly painful. As if they are fun to begin with.

Poor Allen--never get mothers started about birth stories!

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:19 PM
I'll agree with that. It makes contractions terribly, terribly painful. As if they are fun to begin with.

Poor Allen--never get mothers started about birth stories!

Quoted for truth.

*giggles*

And yeah, it's so fast, that's the worst part about the pit. Your body doesn't have a chance to acclimatize to the contractions...you go from zero to a thousand miles an hour in just a few moments. Ugh.

Mr Flibble
02-10-2009, 11:21 PM
My friend gave birth in a car because she did wait too long (very rare).

I almost did too. Then I got the hospital and they said pee in a cup. My screams of 'I'm having this f*ing baby now!' fell on deaf ears. I had three contractions in the time it took to have a pee and was clenching / panting / trying not to push for dear life so the baby didn't fall out into the pan.

But then it was only twenty minutes start to finish.

Perks
02-10-2009, 11:22 PM
A friend of mine had an induction two and a half weeks early. (I begged her to get a second opinion. It was, from my not inconsiderable study on this subject, a stupid, stupid call.) Anyway, she's completely not even close to being in labor and they start the pitocin drip. Nothing. They up it. Nothing. They megadose her and she goes from zero to sixty in a matter of less than thirty minutes and the baby starts reacting negatively.

The doctors actually said, "Well, thank god you were here in the hospital. This little guy doesn't tolerate labor very well." So they gave her a C-section. Ridiculous.

thethinker42
02-10-2009, 11:24 PM
*reads thread*

*e-mails husband about that vasectomy he's been putting off*

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:25 PM
A friend of mine had an induction two and a half weeks early. (I begged her to get a second opinion. It was, from my not inconsiderable study on this subject, a stupid, stupid call.) Anyway, she completely not even close to being in labor and they start the pitocin drip. Nothing. They up it. Nothing. They megadose her and she goes from zero to sixty in a matter of less than thirty minutes and the baby starts reacting negatively.

The doctors actually said, "Well, thank god you were here in the hospital. This little guy doesn't tolerate labor very well." So they gave her a C-section. Ridiculous.

Gah! That's awful!

I loved my first OB (RIP). He joked with me not to go into labor on a Friday night, because that was his "sex-night" with his wife :roll:.

Sure enough, I had my second on a Friday. He was a good doctor, though, and he was only kidding. I know that some docs will schedule inductions for reasons of their convienience (sp), though. Rare, I hope, but I have heard. And things like what happened to your friend are the result.

Perks
02-10-2009, 11:25 PM
Lol! Oh dear. There I go.

Anyway, Allen, labor pains can feel like a lot of thinks. Gas pains? Sure, why not. But she can have little doses of labor between now and the big day and she should be pleased. Those bouts are very good conditioning for the muscles. She's sort of working out and getting pumped for the big show. It's nerve-wracking and uncomfortable, but it sounds like she's doing things just right.

Sorry for all my digressions.

Mr Flibble
02-10-2009, 11:26 PM
*reads thread*

*e-mails husband about that vasectomy he's been putting off*

Shall I tell your hubby about the time my hubby had his snip, and the anaesthetic wore off half way through?

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:27 PM
Lol! Oh dear. There I go.

Anyway, Allen, labor pains can feel like a lot of thinks. Gas pains? Sure, why not. But she can have little doses of labor between now and the big day and she should be pleased. Those bouts are very good conditioning for the muscles. She's sort of working out and getting pumped for the big show. It's nerve-wracking and uncomfortable, but it sounds like she's doing things just right.

Sorry for all my digressions.


*looks guilty*

Perksie is right, though. Braxton-Hicks and even "real" contractions between now and the big day are good-warms, though uncomfortable.

One thing that helped me with them are warm baths, and lots of them. Of course, I needed help to winch myself up outta the tub afterwards, but it's very soothing for momma and baby. :)

Perks
02-10-2009, 11:28 PM
I loved my first OB (RIP). He joked with me not to go into labor on a Friday night, because that was his "sex-night" with his wife :roll:.

My midwife (my second birth was terrific) started cutting up while I was in labor. All of a sudden, in the middle of a contraction, she pipes up with this limerick:

There was a young nymphette named Alice
Who used dynamite as a phallus
They found her vagina
In North Carolina
But her ass was in Buckingham Palace

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:29 PM
My midwife (my second birth was terrific) started cutting up while I was in labor. All of a sudden, in the middle of a contraction, she pipes up with this limerick:

There was a young nymphette named Alice
Who used dynamite as a phallus
They found her vagina
In North Carolina
But her ass was in Buckingham Palace

OMG. Too funny! :roll:

tjwriter
02-10-2009, 11:29 PM
The doctors actually said, "Well, thank god you were here in the hospital. This little guy doesn't tolerate labor very well." So they gave her a C-section. Ridiculous.

That so belongs in the childbirth WTF department.

With my first, I knew that my labor was starting, but my doctor had me head to the hospital way too early and it ended up not being a fun experience. He also didn't want to give me pitocin to get things going because 2pm was too late in the day to be starting it. (My nurse was rather pissed about it.) Of course he encouraged an epidural at 1-2 cm, which made the labor drag out.

My second, with a different doc, was much better and 20 hours less of labor. She had advised me to the 5-1-1 rule, but I was having some slight pre-eclampsia symptoms so she recommended an induction the following Monday. I think I was pretty close to going on my own.

The pitocin didn't bother me, to my surprise. I was on it for two hours, dilating two cm, and I didn't feel it hardly at all. I was just fine until doc came in to break my water and then it started getting painful.

thethinker42
02-10-2009, 11:30 PM
Shall I tell your hubby about the time my hubby had his snip, and the anaesthetic wore off half way through?

SHHHHHHHHH!!!! We don't discuss these things...

Devil Ledbetter
02-10-2009, 11:31 PM
*looks guilty*

Perksie is right, though. Braxton-Hicks and even "real" contractions between now and the big day are good-warms, though uncomfortable.
Braxton-Hicks are to labor as burping is to dry heaves.

(IMO, of course.)

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:35 PM
Braxton-Hicks are to labor as burping is to dry heaves.

(IMO, of course.)

Yeah, usually. They felt really weird to me. :D

DeleyanLee
02-10-2009, 11:35 PM
Can't speak from experience, but I doubt the Guinness Book of World Records has anything about laying a 7lb, 6oz turd.

Maybe not, but that's exactly how it feels: shitting a watermelon.

Stew21
02-10-2009, 11:38 PM
I had a full blown water break with my first - the contractions started immediately at 3 minutes apart. By the time I got to the hospital they were two minutes apart.
It was brutal violent back labor and super fast, lightening speed delivery, too.


with the second, I had light contractions (mild like Braxton-Hicks), and a trickle of water - barely there, but definitely there. The contractions sped up, slowed down, nearly stopped, sped up again. I went to the hospital and the admitted me, confirmed the water leak and we waited and waited and waited. they started pitocin. The labor was twice as long as the first one (my first baby was just ready and my family has a history of super fast labor, the second wanted to stay where he was). In retrospect, I should have just stayed home for a while longer, walked a lot and gotten my contractions regular before I went in. The water leak left me stranded in a hospital bed for hours. I could have gotten it accomplished a lot more comfortably in my own home before I went in.

rhymegirl
02-10-2009, 11:40 PM
Pitocin is a tool of the devil, though, I will say. Gawd, it was awful.

Now see I never knew anything was so bad about pitocin.

I had to have pitocin for my first baby. My labor contractions weren't strong enough or frequent enough and too much time was going by. They said it would be dangerous to let the labor go on too long without help.

I know that the doctor was trying to do 3 different deliveries at the same time so maybe he just wanted to speed things up to help himself out. What did I know, I was a newbie, so I just took the pitocin. I don't remember it being so terrible.

ETA: Oh and yes labor pains can feel like gas pains. But there are also those Braxton-Hicks contractions, too. False labor pains.

Cranky
02-10-2009, 11:47 PM
Now see I never knew anything was so bad about pitocin.

I had to have pitocin for my first baby. My labor contractions weren't strong enough or frequent enough and too much time was going by. They said it would be dangerous to let the labor go on too long without help.

I know that the doctor was trying to do 3 different deliveries at the same time so maybe he just wanted to speed things up to help himself out. What did I know, I was a newbie, so I just took the pitocin. I don't remember it being so terrible.

ETA: Oh and yes labor pains can feel like gas pains. But there are also those Braxton-Hicks contractions, too. False labor pains.

Pitocin didn't bother my SIL, either. And she says that she's had menstrual cramps that were worse than her labor pains...it varies so much from person to person! :)

Monkey
02-10-2009, 11:58 PM
I gave birth at home with my first, and highly recommend it if there's a good midwife in your area...although I mean this in a general sense, and not as a direct response to the OP. Midwives usually want intense involvement throughout your pregnancy...mine did all my prenatal and postnatal care.

Back on the OP...when I had my first "real" contraction, my whole body shook, and there was a definite feeling of "this is it!"

It was funny because I'd felt like the birth was impending for a while and had called my in-laws over. After a couple of hours, the contractions weren't regular, so they went home...and that's when the "body-shaker" happened. They got home to find a message from my husband saying that I wanted them to come back. They were dubious, but they did as I asked, and got back at around the same time the midwife arrived and pronounced that yes, I was in labor, but it looked like I'd be that way for a while. I labored all night, while everyone except for myself and one midwife assistant (appropriately named 'Mercy') slept. Occasionally, I'd kick my husband awake to rub my back. I gave birth just before noon the following day.

It was beautiful. My father-in-law played his acoustic guitar, my mother-in-law had tears of joy in her eyes, my mother cut the umbilical cord. My husband, supporting me from behind, kissed me and then leaned forward and whispered my son's name in his ear.

When it was all over, I slept, cuddling and nursing my new baby boy. I left all the housework and everything else to hubby for several days. He definitely worked off the extra sleep he'd gotten!

But I'm seriously digressing. Point was, I wasn't sure if I was having real contractions or not until I had my first real one. It wasn't something I could talk through without serious effort, my body shook, and (since I was walking when it hit) I lowered myself to the ground.

rhymegirl
02-10-2009, 11:58 PM
Aaaaaaaaaaaagggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Not you Kathy; the doctors. If they leave you alone and don't continually stick their hands in places their hands obviously don't need to be, there's absolutely nothing dangerous about long, mildish, labors.

Last I read, the average labor was something like fifteen hours until it was time to push. If the baby's heart it clipping along nicely, there's nothing that needs to be done.

But did you read what I said? I said the doctor probably gave me pitocin to help himself out. I know a lot more about labor and delivery now after having 3 kids than I did back then. My own doctor was out of town so unfortunately I had to have a substitute doctor. I was only in labor about 8 hours total the first time. So yes, that's pretty short when you think about it. My own doctor might have let it go longer naturally. But when a woman doesn't have all the facts and it's all new to her, she often just goes along with what she's told. I did things a lot differently with my other 2 kids.

Devil Ledbetter
02-11-2009, 12:02 AM
I just want to say it's great to see a childbirth thread where no one is getting touchy or defensive. :)

Perks
02-11-2009, 12:05 AM
But did you read what I said? I said the doctor probably gave me pitocin to help himself out. I know a lot more about labor and delivery now after having 3 kids than I did back then. My own doctor was out of town so unfortunately I had to have a substitute doctor. I was only in labor about 8 hours total the first time. So yes, that's pretty short when you think about it. My own doctor might have let it go longer naturally. But when a woman doesn't have all the facts and it's all new to her, she often just goes along with what she's told. I did things a lot differently with my other 2 kids.Oh I know, babe. I deleted my post because I get way too wound up about these things. I didn't know anything that first time either and got yanked around like you did. I wasn't criticizing you.

That's why I started with it wasn't you, it was him. Please ignore me. I started midwifery training and left it when we had to move and I know enough to get myself into trouble.

kristie911
02-11-2009, 12:18 AM
I didn't realize I was in labor with my son. I went to my regular check-up (2 weeks before my due date) and told the doctor I hadn't slept very well the night before because I felt a little crampy on and off. He checked me and said (to my suprise!), "That's because you're in labor and at 5cm." I still ended up having a pitocin drip but I didn't think it was that big of a deal because I also had an epidural.

I did, however, push for nearly 2 hours and that sucked. I have no idea how long I was in labor because I don't know when it started but I was in the hospital for 8 hours before I had my son.

DeleyanLee
02-11-2009, 12:24 AM
I had back labor with both my kids, so never had the traditional labor pains everyone talks about. My pains centered around the mule-kick to the small of my back that slowly radiated around the rest of my abdomen. From what the doctor said, I started in labor with my first one about Friday afternoon and didn't deliver until the wee hours of Monday morning.

Water never broke either. They broke it just before midnight the night she was born. The second time, when the water broke, it sprayed and hit 2 nurses, walls, windows and my ex. Big pop. It was pretty cool in retrospect.

Back in those days, we had to go to LaMaze for dad to be in the birthing room. That was a total waste for me, honestly, 'cause nothing they ever told me about birthing was what I experienced. However, I will say that when it's really time, Mom knows. Just don't argue with her, like my ex did. It makes us women in pain cranky. ;)

Sarita
02-11-2009, 12:32 AM
Back in those days, we had to go to LaMaze for dad to be in the birthing room.
They made my husband go, and that was just 3 years ago.

My OB, who was obsessed with statistics, said that the average first pregnancy is 41 weeks. Yes. 10 months and one week. Of course, he didn't tell me this until I was at 42 weeks and ready to slaughter anyone who spoke to me. My only advice to any pregnant couple or person is to pretend your due date is 2 weeks past when they tell you it is. And to tell everyone else the wrong date because the "you're still pregant" remarks get REALLY old by the time you're 40 weeks. And then, if you have to wait longer, it's just torture.

One other thing: Allen, if you or your wife is nervous about anything, get checked out. Because it's easier to go in for 3 false alarms than to have a baby on the couch ;)

cray
02-11-2009, 12:34 AM
One other thing: Allen, if you or your wife is nervous about anything, get checked out. Because it's easier to go in for 3 false alarms than to have a baby on the couch ;)


yep, yep, yep.
peace of mind and all that.

Rarri
02-11-2009, 12:49 AM
Most important thing to remember is that every labour and birth is different. Several of my friends had sickeningly quick and 'easy' (ie uncomplicated) births, most were out of the hospital or birthing centre within a few hours; where as with my son i was in labour for over sixty hours and i was horribly ill.

Anyhow! If in doubt, get checked out, wont take a midwife moments to see if your other half is dilated; oh, and don't feel down trodden, if you or your other half aren't happy with something: say so!!!

Old Hack
02-11-2009, 12:55 AM
I thought that labour pains felt like gastroenteritis. Griping, painful, and all-consuming. Just so you know. Now go back to lovely baby stories, because I like reading them all!

underthecity
02-11-2009, 01:31 AM
Thanks for all the stories and things. Who knows what's going to happen. It could be this week, it could be March. I'd prefer it to be March; we're not 100% ready yet. I know I'm not ready. I'm still getting used to the idea that there's going to be permanent third person in our house in about three weeks. And that person requires round the clock care.

The shower was Sunday. We got much of what we needed. Since I'm unemployed, I'm trying to pick up some freelance work, but that hasn't come together yet. And my novel keeps getting rejections, so that's no fun.

But, when the baby comes, looks like I'll be here during the day.

MoonWriter
02-11-2009, 02:00 AM
After the needles had been hidden, I was called into the delivery room. My wife was laying comfortably on the table feeling no pain thanks to the epidural. She smiled, proud that I made it to the stool by her side. A semi-circular curtain had been set up on top of her naval to screen the caesarian, but one of the two doctors said, “Please, feel free to get up and have a look.” I simply smiled, not trusting which words would come out of my mouth.

The rest of my child birthing experience is rather foggy. The anesthesiologist was as big as Refrigerator Perry from the Chicago Bears, and she wasn’t wearing any pads that I could see. I remember the Refrigerator raising a needle into my field of vision. I looked away, my ear now facing the little curtain, and I actually heard the incision. My wife told me I looked green. I smiled to reassure her I was fine, then turned and gasped for air only to see the needle again, plunging into my wife’s I.V. My eyes, acting on their own, rolled up, seeking the peaceful darkness of my skull. I began to rock on the stool. At least I think I was rocking – it’s harder to tell when you can’t see. “Doctor, quick, the husband.” My eyes rolled down to see two hands clasping my shirt just below my chin. The Refrigerator lifted me off the stool, dragged me some ten feet and deposited me against a wall to fend for myself.

I have to admit, the ride down the wall was slow and painless. And to my credit, I could see. I saw the back of my wife’s head. A few seconds later, I saw them raise my baby over the little curtain and carry it to a table where it became the center of attention for two or three doctors or nurses, it’s hard to tell which because they all wear the same cute green outfits, the ones they wear to the grocery store and church.

It took a while, but I finally got my legs to move, spastically at first, but I was nonetheless proud they were moving. In a matter of a minute, they began to obey my commands and I was able to stand up, using my hand against the wall to balance myself . In no time at all, I had recovered and walked back to my stool, sat down and leaned over, close to my wife so that I wouldn’t be subjected to any more horrific sights. My wife gave me one of her beautiful smiles which, to be honest, wasn’t as attractive when viewed from my perspective just an inch or two away. After a minute of closeness, she suggested that I go see how our baby was doing. My wife must have wanted to know if we had a boy or a girl, so I bravely crossed the room to find out, studying the tile floor as I went, until I reached the party of doctors and/or nurses.

Eye drops were administered without a hitch, but when they started suctioning every orifice, well, I just looked away. And yes, I was now on the bad side of the little curtain and I saw the doctor raise his needle, completing the first stitch. Unfortunately, this time I gave no warning and I had no wall to slide down. My legs gave out and I assume I hit the floor hard. I couldn’t see, but I wasn’t so bad off that I lost all of my senses. I could still hear. It was one of the doctors, the one doing the stitches I believe that said, “Somebody get that man out of here before he hurts himself.”

When I came to, I found myself seated alone in a dark waiting room in front of a muted TV. I looked at the light shinning through the long, narrow window in the door and happened to see my wife’s doctors passing by. One looked over his shoulder and, unfortunately, saw me. He stopped, walked back and stuck his head in the door. “Congratulations,” he said. I thought he was referring to my baby boy, but then he added, “some dad’s don’t make it to the actual birth.” It was a proud moment for me, but I must admit, had I been allowed in the delivery room when my daughter was born, I never would have seen the birth of my son. Once would have been enough. Childbirth is just too painful.

Jersey Chick
02-11-2009, 02:01 AM
I'm late to the party here, but chances are if your wife doesn't know at first, she will figure it out when she can't take a step without thinking, "This really effing hurts!!!"

I say that because I actually went into labor in my OB's office. I was a week past my due date and (this was a Thursday), and my OB said if I didn't go by Tuesday, she'd induce me. At the end of my appointment, I picked my jacket up from the chair in the office and a bunch change fell out of my pocket and scattered all over the floor (I know, it seems like I'm digressing, but trust me, I'm not.)

So I crouch down (really funny since I was ALL gut and have terrible knees), scoop up my change and dump in back in the pocket. As I stood, whoa... it hurt... but I had Braxton Hicks from about the middle of the 7th month and mine were strong! So I thought nothing of it and went home, wishing it was Tuesday so I could breathe and eat more than a cracker a day because the baby was squishing everything.

Well, the pains just wouldn't go away. I did everything I was told to make them stop - walk around, drink lots of water. Nothing. By 9PM that night, I was on the steps in tears because I couldn't get comfortable and every step was an effort and maybe, just maybe, I was in labor??

Yep. When it. Just. Doesn't. Stop. Time to call the doctor. :D

In the hospital, I got pitocin to move things along - and I don't really remember much about it because I had an epidural as well (that epidural man was my best friend, I'll tell you. I'd have married him except for.. well... I was kind of busy at the time and my husband was standing right there. :D) I also did no yelling, and really had no urge to, even when the pain was the worst (I had complications that rendered the epidural pretty much pointless, but had nothing to do with the pitocin, either.) Actually, the nurse was really surprised. Kept assuring me it was okay to yell. Finally, I asked her if it would make things hurt less and she just kind of looked at me strangely and said it wouldn't. So I said, "I really don't see the point, either."

Oh, and I didn't yell at Jersey Guy or try to strangle him or nothing. I did, however, almost throw up on him, so you'd best be prepared for anything ;)

I have an exciting birth story to go with it, but I'll save that for when your wife had already delivered and you've come back to tell us how healthy and bee-yootiful your baby is. :D

selkn.asrai
02-11-2009, 02:31 AM
Most important thing to remember is that every labour and birth is different. Several of my friends had sickeningly quick and 'easy' (ie uncomplicated) births, most were out of the hospital or birthing centre within a few hours; where as with my son i was in labour for over sixty hours and i was horribly ill.



God bless you. My boyfriend jokes that his birthday is more like a festival, because his mother was in labor for a full three days before he finally let go and entered the world. (God help me if we ever have children, eh?)

My mother had to be induced with my sister and youngest brother. She was a total month late with my sister--which led to an array of health problems from hormones and a broken collar bone for her (my sister, I mean)--and when my brother was a week late, the doctors didn't want to take chances because the previous labor had been so dangerous.

I've never had a baby, so forgive any ignorance on my part, but what is pitocin? Is it a preventitive medicine? From the posts here, I'm deducing that it speeds things along--why is it frowned upon?

Perks
02-11-2009, 02:39 AM
Pitocin is a synthesized version of Oxytocin, one of the hormones that's present during labor. Oxytocin causes uterine contractions. The problem is, uterine contractions are not labor. Labor is a complex physiological process that involves quite a number of hormones and physical changes. Sometimes, when you goose the system with a little pitocin, the resultant uterine contractions will kick start real labor. But too often, it just doesn't.

What a lot of people don't understand is that contractions are only one facet of labor and everything needs to be working in concert to get a baby out. I am very against the casual or routine dosing of pregnant women with pitocin.

Now if you're hemorrhaging, pitocin is genius and has saved many a life.

selkn.asrai
02-11-2009, 02:41 AM
Thank you for the info, Perks. :) Google was failing me.

trickywoo
02-11-2009, 04:29 AM
They made my husband go, and that was just 3 years ago.

And to tell everyone else the wrong date because the "you're still pregant" remarks get REALLY old by the time you're 40 weeks. And then, if you have to wait longer, it's just torture.

;)

YES! I'm going to be induced on 3/4, and I am already getting the - are you walking the baby out? You're about to pop! commments.

Lovely.

With my first, early labor felt like period cramps, so, yes she could be feeling them, but I think a good rule of thumb is that if she can still talk through the cramps, she probably should wait it out at home.

To me, it was pretty evident that they turned into contractions - regular tightening around my back and middle that grew a little more painful as time went on. With a first pregnancy, though, early labor can last a long time, so unless she's really in pain, I would guess it's a practice run.

Another thing to look for is the loss of mucous plug and/or bloody show - that can be a good sign that things are about to kick into gear. Good luck, and I hope the next few weeks go by fast! I know I'm keeping my fingers crossed they do. Maybe our kiddos will have the same birthday. ;)

chevbrock
02-11-2009, 05:30 AM
At this stage along, I'm guessing that your wife will be up to weekly visits with the OB or Midwife. If you're concerned, they may be able to check and see if bubs has engaged and/or the cervix has softened any.

SouthernFriedJulie
02-11-2009, 08:10 PM
Do the pains make her scream, call you names and threaten to kill you as soon as she can get out of the bed to wrap her hands around your throat? No?

Then it's not time yet.



ROTFLMAO

Can't even think to formulate a good reply to OP now.

CaroGirl
02-11-2009, 08:16 PM
...I'd prefer it to be March; we're not 100% ready yet. I know I'm not ready...
No one is ever ready. That's the number one baby myth out there. That you can be "ready." The baby can be fully cooked (even late), the nursery decorated, carseat installed, names chosen, but when that baby comes, your life will get turned upside down in more ways than you can ever anticipate. Not all in a bad way, btw. Most of it is good. Very good.

Libbie
02-11-2009, 08:23 PM
I did a google search for this, but I need a more specific answer.

My wife's due date is March 1. Yesterday she said she was feeling gas pains all day, but today not so much.

She said it was time for me to wash some of the baby clothes in Dreft and put the baby seat in.

What does this mean? Is the baby coming this week?

Yeah, it could or it could not.

The important thing to remember is that there are three stages to labor: the first stage has relatively minor pains in which the muscles tense upward, toward her head. They are acting to pull the cervix open, and they pull upward to kind of pull it over the baby's head, like pulling on a turtleneck sweater.

Then there's transition, where you switch from the first part to pushing labor. Last comes pushing labor, in which the muscles contract downward very powerfully to push the baby out of the uterus.

The first stage is usually relatively mild, and can go on for hours or days. It's normal for women to go about their daily routine while having timed contractions during this phase. As they get closer to transition, they have to stop and concentrate more on breathing and relaxing through each contraction.

So even if she is in labor, you don't have to start expecting that the baby is imminent until she starts to get to the point where she has to stop what she's doing to concentrate on the contractions. Even then, it could be hours before transition.

I know a staggering amount about labor and delivery for a woman who's never been pregnant before! It as mostly research for a novel, and also watching my sis give birth at home to my beautiful nephew. :)

Congrats on the time being so close! You must be very excited.

Lyxdeslic
02-11-2009, 11:26 PM
After the needles had been hidden, I was called into the delivery room. My wife was laying comfortably on the table feeling no pain thanks to the epidural. She smiled, proud that I made it to the stool by her side. A semi-circular curtain had been set up on top of her naval to screen the caesarian, but one of the two doctors said, “Please, feel free to get up and have a look.” I simply smiled, not trusting which words would come out of my mouth.

The rest of my child birthing experience is rather foggy. The anesthesiologist was as big as Refrigerator Perry from the Chicago Bears, and she wasn’t wearing any pads that I could see. I remember the Refrigerator raising a needle into my field of vision. I looked away, my ear now facing the little curtain, and I actually heard the incision. My wife told me I looked green. I smiled to reassure her I was fine, then turned and gasped for air only to see the needle again, plunging into my wife’s I.V. My eyes, acting on their own, rolled up, seeking the peaceful darkness of my skull. I began to rock on the stool. At least I think I was rocking – it’s harder to tell when you can’t see. “Doctor, quick, the husband.” My eyes rolled down to see two hands clasping my shirt just below my chin. The Refrigerator lifted me off the stool, dragged me some ten feet and deposited me against a wall to fend for myself.

I have to admit, the ride down the wall was slow and painless. And to my credit, I could see. I saw the back of my wife’s head. A few seconds later, I saw them raise my baby over the little curtain and carry it to a table where it became the center of attention for two or three doctors or nurses, it’s hard to tell which because they all wear the same cute green outfits, the ones they wear to the grocery store and church.

It took a while, but I finally got my legs to move, spastically at first, but I was nonetheless proud they were moving. In a matter of a minute, they began to obey my commands and I was able to stand up, using my hand against the wall to balance myself . In no time at all, I had recovered and walked back to my stool, sat down and leaned over, close to my wife so that I wouldn’t be subjected to any more horrific sights. My wife gave me one of her beautiful smiles which, to be honest, wasn’t as attractive when viewed from my perspective just an inch or two away. After a minute of closeness, she suggested that I go see how our baby was doing. My wife must have wanted to know if we had a boy or a girl, so I bravely crossed the room to find out, studying the tile floor as I went, until I reached the party of doctors and/or nurses.

Eye drops were administered without a hitch, but when they started suctioning every orifice, well, I just looked away. And yes, I was now on the bad side of the little curtain and I saw the doctor raise his needle, completing the first stitch. Unfortunately, this time I gave no warning and I had no wall to slide down. My legs gave out and I assume I hit the floor hard. I couldn’t see, but I wasn’t so bad off that I lost all of my senses. I could still hear. It was one of the doctors, the one doing the stitches I believe that said, “Somebody get that man out of here before he hurts himself.”

When I came to, I found myself seated alone in a dark waiting room in front of a muted TV. I looked at the light shinning through the long, narrow window in the door and happened to see my wife’s doctors passing by. One looked over his shoulder and, unfortunately, saw me. He stopped, walked back and stuck his head in the door. “Congratulations,” he said. I thought he was referring to my baby boy, but then he added, “some dad’s don’t make it to the actual birth.” It was a proud moment for me, but I must admit, had I been allowed in the delivery room when my daughter was born, I never would have seen the birth of my son. Once would have been enough. Childbirth is just too painful.Really? Wow. All about me much? Just sayin'. Here, I have a shoe for you, and I'm pretty sure it fits.

CaroGirl
02-11-2009, 11:41 PM
My Pitocin Story

My water broke at 4 am, 3 1/2 weeks before my due date. I called the hospital and they said I could shower, not bathe, and to head on into the hospital. No rush. So I did. I had a shower, dressed, packed a bag, ate some toast, and we casually headed off.

They tested the fluid to make sure it was amniotic and sure enough my water had broken, but my labour wasn't progressing at all. No dilation or contractions. Nothing. BUT there's a high risk of infection to the fetus witout the protection of its amniotic fluid. I don't know how long I would have waited had my labour not begun on its own.

So they started me on Pitocin. Okay, OUCH! I threw up because the pain was so terrible. But there was lots of time for an epidural so that was good. And labour progressed and baby came. Early but healthy.

And that's my story. He's 11 now.

MoonWriter
02-11-2009, 11:59 PM
Really? Wow. All about me much? Just sayin'. Here, I have a shoe for you, and I'm pretty sure it fits.

I guess you missed the ironic humor - child birth being all about the husband. I told a shorter version, just the passing out parts, at a writer's group. They (they being all women) suggested I write the story and submit it for possible publication. One lady suggested I make it all about me, so I did. But I had no time or interest in publishing it, so it sat in my computer until I pasted it here.

About your kind offer - I'll pass. I have enough comfortable shoes. Besides, it looks better sticking out of your mouth.

Monkey
02-12-2009, 01:16 AM
Ok, guys, the women haven't gotten defensive, so don't YOU start! :D

I loved Moonwriter's story.

And thank you, Lyxdeslic, for realizing that credit for birthing goes primarily to mom.

Koombaya...

Devil Ledbetter
02-12-2009, 01:23 AM
They tested the fluid to make sure it was amniotic and sure enough my water had broken, but my labour wasn't progressing at all. No dilation or contractions. Nothing. BUT there's a high risk of infection to the fetus witout the protection of its amniotic fluid. There is. And it comes from being at the hospital and having the personnel frequently "checking" you thereby introducing germs. They don't tell us this though. The same thing happened to me - not the pitocin, but the leaking amniotic fluid leading to them keeping me hospitalized when I wasn't in active labor and would not go into labor for several more hours. What a drag that was.

Hmm, that baby is also 11. :)


And thank you, Lyxdeslic, for realizing that credit for birthing goes primarily to mom.It sure does.

Perks
02-12-2009, 01:25 AM
BUT there's a high risk of infection to the fetus witout the protection of its amniotic fluid. This is actually somewhat of a myth. If there is no meconium staining, there is really no dramatic risk of impending infection if nothing is inserted into the vagina, including and most particularly, doctor's and nurse's fingers. Many experts agree that it's is safe to wait, with monitoring, for even seventy-two hours for labor to start naturally after the amniotic sac has ruptured and as long as the umbilical cord is not compromised.

The body will keep making amniotic fluid to self-clean the whole works (just like your eye) for as long as the baby is in there and the mom's healthy and hydrated. The baby doesn't really need the fluid for anything at that point.

So if the water breaks, it's good to get the baby's heart rate checked, but it is imperitive not to allow anyone to do an internal exam in the absence of contractions. (And that's assuming the heartrate indicated that there's no cord compression.)

Perks
02-12-2009, 01:28 AM
Oops! I didn't see that the Devil had gotten here before me. Lol! Great minds think alike and all...

CaroGirl
02-12-2009, 03:22 AM
This is actually somewhat of a myth. If there is no meconium staining, there is really no dramatic risk of impending infection if nothing is inserted into the vagina, including and most particularly, doctor's and nurse's fingers. Many experts agree that it's is safe to wait, with monitoring, for even seventy-two hours for labor to start naturally after the amniotic sac has ruptured and as long as the umbilical cord is not compromised.

The body will keep making amniotic fluid to self-clean the whole works (just like your eye) for as long as the baby is in there and the mom's healthy and hydrated. The baby doesn't really need the fluid for anything at that point.

So if the water breaks, it's good to get the baby's heart rate checked, but it is imperitive not to allow anyone to do an internal exam in the absence of contractions. (And that's assuming the heartrate indicated that there's no cord compression.)
Indeed. And, sadly, this is information the young(ish) mother is not always armed with when thrust into such a situation. Don't we all expect, and hope, everything to go smoothly? When it doesn't, trusting medical professionals is less scary than any alternative when your health and the health of the baby is at issue.

I don't think there was meconium staining with this birth. There was with my second, but she was on time (3 days prior to due date) and labour progressed as expected.

I do so hate feeling like a victim. However, though my son's birth wasn't ideal, he ended up healthy and well, and is a darn fine downhill skier, not to mention he plays a mean piano. :)

CaroGirl
02-12-2009, 03:23 AM
There is. And it comes from being at the hospital and having the personnel frequently "checking" you thereby introducing germs. They don't tell us this though. The same thing happened to me - not the pitocin, but the leaking amniotic fluid leading to them keeping me hospitalized when I wasn't in active labor and would not go into labor for several more hours. What a drag that was.

Hmm, that baby is also 11. :)

It sure does.
Thanks for the info.

Eleven: Fun, huh? 1997 was a great year.

Perks
02-12-2009, 04:24 AM
Indeed. And, sadly, this is information the young(ish) mother is not always armed with when thrust into such a situation. Don't we all expect, and hope, everything to go smoothly? When it doesn't, trusting medical professionals is less scary than any alternative when your health and the health of the baby is at issue.

I don't think there was meconium staining with this birth. There was with my second, but she was on time (3 days prior to due date) and labour progressed as expected.

I do so hate feeling like a victim. However, though my son's birth wasn't ideal, he ended up healthy and well, and is a darn fine downhill skier, not to mention he plays a mean piano. :)Oh yeah. I'm not criticizing you at all. I was the same way with my first and I knew all the stuff. I just didn't realize that come that day, I'd feel too vulnerable to speak up for myself and my baby. I don't cast you in any negative light with this at all. I just look to present the other side whenever I get the chance so that more people will know and hopefully feel bolder than I did.

Believe me, I know how you feel.

cooeedownunder
02-12-2009, 04:48 AM
because my daugher was postion with her spine on mine, it felt like a drill had been put into the nerves of my spine...absolutly horrible.

Monkey
02-12-2009, 05:59 AM
One of the things that I really loved about the care I recieved from my midwife is that she kept me educated every step of the way. She gave me books to read, videos to watch, and we talked for hours about pregnancy and birthing.

My first pregnancy went smoothly enough, and we were able to do the whole process at home--a beautiful experience!

We weren't so lucky with my second pregnancy; the baby was positioned in such a way that she couldn't be delivered vaginally. We had to go in for a C-section. My midwife rode in the ambulance with me, and was able to help me in ways that the ambulance crew are legally restricted from. She also asked them not to strap both my legs in place, so I could move through the contractions, which helped tremendously. She had a written list of my birthing preferences and acted as my advocate when I was unconscious, and handled paperwork for me, too. She had a written record of my entire pregnancy and was able to answer all the doctors' questions. Not only that, several doctors and nurses commented that I was the most well-informed patient they'd ever had.

My midwife and her team didn't leave the hospital until the baby was safely in my arms...and then, when they did leave, they returned several hours later with a cute new onesie for my little girl! And they handled my post-natal care, too.

If I had a million more pregnancies ahead of me, I'd choose a midwife a million more times.
:)