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View Full Version : The Ultimate Battle: Penguins v. Badgers



scarletpeaches
12-26-2008, 03:10 PM
Which PWN? Give reasons!
http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii53/doriangrayspictures/Penguinhalo.jpghttp://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii53/doriangrayspictures/Badgerbadgerbadger.png

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 03:12 PM
Penguins pwn badgers.

They just do.

Even after the embarrassing atrocity that was "Happy Feet", penguins pwn.

scarletpeaches
12-26-2008, 03:16 PM
Badgers, however, braved the catastrophe that was the Mattastroface.

Still...I vote penguins, 'cause of this li'l guy:
http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii53/doriangrayspictures/Pingulogo.png

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 03:17 PM
Badgers, however, braved the catastrophe that was the Mattastroface.

They should've sent in the penguins. They would've left him encased in the iceburg and made the world a better place. But instead, he wanders among us with a badger-gnawed face as a reminder of the badgers' epic FAILURE.

scarletpeaches
12-26-2008, 03:18 PM
They should've sent in the penguins. They would've left him encased in the iceburg and made the world a better place. But instead, he wanders among us with a badger-gnawed face as a reminder of the badgers' epic FAILURE.

These fax truly are tru.

Further proof - as if such were needed - that penguins PWN.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 03:21 PM
I will say this though...

Badgers are HELLA better dancers than penguins. I'd sooner sit through 3 hours of the BADGERBADGERBADGER dance than watch Happy Feet again.

scarletpeaches
12-26-2008, 03:23 PM
Hopefully some other AWers will be along soon to contribute to this serious debate.

Don
12-26-2008, 04:05 PM
Given what I've learned on AW, Chihuahuahuahuas and Ferrets could kick any penguin or badger's @$$. :D

Also, your poll is skewed because you left off Orlando Eggplant Bloom (deceased).

http://inlinethumb59.webshots.com/2234/2101084430100527759S425x425Q85.jpg

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 04:07 PM
Given what I've learned on AW, Chihuahuahuahuas and Ferrets could kick any penguin or badger's @$$. :D

Also, your poll is skewed because you left off Orlando Eggplant Bloom (deceased).



Don, don't make me come over there.

I have a meat thermometer and I know how to use it.

AND I'm writing your biography, which could always use a little more violence to spice things up.

Don
12-26-2008, 04:16 PM
Don, don't make me come over there.

I have a meat thermometer and I know how to use it.

AND I'm writing your biography, which could always use a little more violence to spice things up.
What is it with you and violence? I'm a lover, not a fighter, and you need to get that straight if you're going to write my bio.

((Does dungeon work count as violence? I've got some nifty racks, clips, floggers, clamps, candles, hot oil, and rope tricks, but I prefer not to break skin or leave permanent marks. I find that tends to lose the audience. :e2brows:))

dpaterso
12-26-2008, 04:44 PM
Tactics: Beak and flippers vs. fangs and claws.
Waddling vs. circus acrobat agility.
Slow marching in straight lies vs. frenetic scampering in all directions.
Terrain: Both species suited to cold climates.
Penguins noticably lethargic in warmer climates.
Badger claws grip ice.
Badgers run on all fours.
Supply Logistics: Penguins can only eat fish; can't stray far from sea.
Badgers eat anything, anywhere.
Badgers can coerce flying squirrels into making long-range supply drops.
If Things Go Bad: If penguins are forced to retreat, they dive into the water where seals and killer whales have a feast.
If badgers have to retreat, they hide out in fortified underground sets where they can hold out forever against enemy incursions. Those tunnels are bewildering mazes filled with death traps. Multiple exits allow swift raids on enemy positions, weakening command authority and disrupting supply lines.
Ability to Supply Reinforcements: Penguins lay one egg at a time.
Badgers have litters.
Not looking good for Pingu.

-Derek

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 04:45 PM
What is it with you and violence?

Wouldn't you like to know? ;)


I'm a lover, not a fighter, and you need to get that straight if you're going to write my bio.

This is the Hollywood adaptation. The fighter side that I'm making up about you will get me a less restrictive rating than the lover side. You know how it is - violence good, loving bad. Sorry, that's the way it goes.


((Does dungeon work count as violence? I've got some nifty racks, clips, floggers, clamps, candles, hot oil, and rope tricks, but I prefer not to break skin or leave permanent marks. I find that tends to lose the audience. :e2brows:))

Amateur.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 04:47 PM
BLAH BLAH BLAH

Penguins rule, badgers drool.

Well, actually they kinda froth at the mouth and slobber all over the place...but...close enough.

scarletpeaches
12-26-2008, 04:53 PM
dpaterso - At least someone is taking this thread seriously.

I salute you, sir.

Even if you are completely wrong.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 04:54 PM
I'm taking the thread srsly. Penguins srsly pwn badgers. Period.

Pwning badgers is srs bznz.

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 05:05 PM
Why do I have to choose? I like them both for different reasons.

Penguins, seriously cute, especially when they pop out of the water to get up on the ice.

Badgers, cute in a Rolling Thunder kind of way.

thinker is right. This is srs bznz. my brain wants to asplode just thinking about it. :e2cry:

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:08 PM
Why do I have to choose? I like them both for different reasons.

Because you do.


Penguins, seriously cute, especially when they pop out of the water to getup on the ice.

See? 'nough said.


Badgers, cute in a Rolling Thunder kind of way.

Thank you for making my point. Rolling Thunder is NOT cute.


thinker is right.

Truer words were never spoken. :D


This is srs bznz. my brain wants to asplode just thinking about it. :e2cry:

ANSWER. THE. QUESTION. NAO. C'MON. NAO!!!!! *taps foot*

Don
12-26-2008, 05:09 PM
In a fantasy world, where penguins have magic powers and the protection of a fairy godmother, penguins rule, no doubt. They're way cuter.

However, in the real world, Derek nailed it. Penguins are badger bait.

ETA: Come on, Derek, get that vote in where it can be counted. I'm all alone up there so far.

ETA2: However, Cows with Guns (http://www.cowswithguns.com/cowmovie.html) can whip both their @$$e$.

Don
12-26-2008, 05:11 PM
Amateur.
I'm afeared. Srsly.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:16 PM
In a fantasy world, where penguins have magic powers and the protection of a fairy godmother, penguins rule, no doubt. They're way cuter.

Them's fightin words.


However, in the real world, Derek nailed it. Penguins are badger bait.You know why you never hear about penguins killing badgers?

Because penguins are better at hiding the bodies.


ETA2: However, Cows with Guns (http://www.cowswithguns.com/cowmovie.html) can whip both their @$$e$.With the added help of chickens in choppers, yes, I'll give you that.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:16 PM
I'm afeared. Srsly.

:D

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 05:26 PM
Because you do.



See? 'nough said.



Thank you for making my point. Rolling Thunder is NOT cute.



Truer words were never spoken. :D



ANSWER. THE. QUESTION. NAO. C'MON. NAO!!!!! *taps foot*
but, but, I like Rolling Thunder. :e2cry:

Oh all right, don't get your thong in knot.

Badgers, because like Rolling Thunder they're good in a fight. srsly. If I were facing down a bunch of rabid penguins I would want a badger or RT with me. :)

scarletpeaches
12-26-2008, 05:29 PM
If you were tracked down by even one rabid penguin, there's not a badger army that could save you.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:29 PM
but, but, I like Rolling Thunder. :e2cry:

Your vote doesn't count then.


Oh all right, don't get your thong in knot.

I don't wear a thong. Ask Don.


Badgers, because like Rolling Thunder they're good in a fight. srsly. If I were facing down a bunch of rabid penguins I would want a badger or RT with me. :)

Penguins don't need rabies to be badass. They're so badass, rabies gets penguin shots.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:31 PM
Penguins are the Chuck Norris of the animal kingdom, folks. Why do you think James Bond dresses like one? I mean, c'mon. James Bond wouldn't be nearly as badass without his suit...because he's trying to be a damned penguin.

I hereby change the name to pwnguins.

scarletpeaches
12-26-2008, 05:33 PM
*has changed usertitle*

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:34 PM
*has changed usertitle*

*WINS* :D

JoeEkaitis
12-26-2008, 05:35 PM
There are no penguins in The Wind in the Willows.

No, really.

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 05:35 PM
Your vote doesn't count then.

:tongue:

It should count more as I seem to be the only one openly admits to liking Rolling Thunder.

If you were tracked down by even one rabid penguin, there's not a badger army that could save you.
Oooooooo, I'm so scared. :e2tongue:

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:37 PM
There are no penguins in The Wind in the Willows.

No, really.

Then The Wind in the Willows is a giant bucket of epic FAIL.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:38 PM
:tongue:

It should count more as I seem to be the only one openly admits to liking Rolling Thunder.

That means you clearly don't know what you're talking about, and as such, are an incompetent voter.


Oooooooo, I'm so scared. :e2tongue:

*unleashes the pwnguin army*

Be afraid. Be VERY afraid.

Don
12-26-2008, 05:41 PM
I don't wear a thong. Ask Don.

Well, except when you're doing your Thong and Dance routine.

'Standing' room only... srsly!

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 05:44 PM
That means you clearly don't know what you're talking about, and as such, are an incompetent voter.

I'm an American. Not only do we allow incompetent people to vote, we elect them into office. My vote count should count double. :tongue:



*unleashes the pwnguin army*

Be afraid. Be VERY afraid.
:guns:

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:48 PM
Well, except when you're doing your Thong and Dance routine.

'Standing' room only... srsly!

You weren't supposed to tell anyone about that. Jeez...

Don
12-26-2008, 05:48 PM
You weren't supposed to tell anyone about that. Jeez...
I guess I should take the video off of YouTube, then?

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:50 PM
I'm an American. Not only do we allow incompetent people to vote, we elect them into office. My vote count should count double. :tongue

I'm an American, too.

In fact, I'm a stupid English-only-speaking American living in a foreign non-English-speaking land and being a stupid American resident-tourist, so my vote counts for triple.

Pwnguins WIN. HANDS DOWN.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:51 PM
I guess I should take the video off of YouTube, then?

Unless you want me to upload the OTHER video...

Don
12-26-2008, 05:52 PM
Unless you want me to upload the OTHER video...
You should know better than to threaten me.

Okay, everybody. Here's the video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0).

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:54 PM
You should know better than to threaten me.

Don't make me throw kitchenware at you.

dpaterso
12-26-2008, 05:57 PM
Facts:
The Badger (http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&q=badger%20comic) is a cool superhero.
The Penguin (http://images.google.com/images?um=1&hl=en&q=penguin+batman) is a laughable villain.

-Derek

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 05:58 PM
PENGUINS PWN BADGERS

-Derek

'bout time someone saw it my way...

alleycat
12-26-2008, 05:58 PM
"Well, ladies and gentlemen, what a surprising first round this is turning out to be. Even though the ever-popular penguins had the momentum of a head-start and unsportsmanlike help from the sidelines, the noble badgers have surged ahead by the smallest of margins.

For all of you without a life, this is shaping up to be the battle of the century . . . if you can stay awake. As we enter the second round the ultimate winner of this fierce contest is anyone's guess. This reporter suspects that it may come down to a nose, or beak, as the case may be.

Stay tuned for our continuous live coverage."

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:02 PM
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g76/shadow_ferret/angrybadger.jpg

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:03 PM
OH NOES! NOT TEH SCARY RODENT THINGY!!!

You know why you never see a badger fighting a pwnguin? Because the badgers run away screaming every freaking time. A badger taking on a pwnguin would be like Steve Urkell taking on Chuck Norris. Isn't even a fair fight.

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:06 PM
You know, I give up. Honestly. I'm going to change my user name to something else.

I am so tired of the rodent comments.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:07 PM
You've all enraged the evil penguins.

Don't say you weren't warned. Now there's nowhere to run.

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/evilPenguin.jpg

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/e4dee531-59e8-4072-8f27-bad5192ae65.jpg

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/evilpenguin-1.jpg

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:08 PM
You know, I give up. Honestly. I'm going to change my user name to something else.

I am so tired of the rodent comments.

I was talking about the pathetic little badger picture you posted.

Yeesh...assume much?

dpaterso
12-26-2008, 06:13 PM
rodent n. mammal with strong incisors and no canine teeth, e.g. the rat, mouse, squirrel, beaver, and porcupine. [Latin rodo gnaw]

Relevant portions underlined for the hard of understanding.

-Derek

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:14 PM
Considering ferrets and badgers are part of the same family...

rip a badger, rip a ferret.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:17 PM
rodent n. mammal with strong incisors and no canine teeth, e.g. the rat, mouse, squirrel, beaver, and porcupine. [Latin rodo gnaw]

Relevant portions underlined for the hard of understanding.

-Derek

Bite me.


Considering ferrets and badgers are part of the same family...

rip a badger, rip a ferret.

And do you notice that "rip a penguin" isn't in there?

Clearly...penguins win again.

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:21 PM
Whatever.

How does Ed, as a username sound? I'll have to delete all my ferret pics and come up with something else.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:23 PM
Whatever.

How does Ed, as a username sound? I'll have to delete all my ferret pics and come up with something else.

We could call you "Weasel".





I actually had a ferret named "Weasel" once...go figure...but if you bite me like she did, I'll be calling you much worse names...

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:27 PM
but if you bite me like she did, I'll be calling you much worse names...
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g76/shadow_ferret/bitingferret.jpg

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:29 PM
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g76/shadow_ferret/bitingferret.jpg

Is that the best you can do?

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:31 PM
Unfortunately, the web doesn't seem to have any decent bloody, flesh-torn, pictures of ferrets gone evil. So, yeah.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:31 PM
Unfortunately, the web doesn't seem to have any decent bloody, flesh-torn, pictures of ferrets gone evil. So, yeah.

Yet the web is full of pictures of evil penguins.

Lock thread. Pwnguins win.

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:32 PM
It was about badgers though.

Tool.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:34 PM
It was about badgers though.

Tool.

And even with the help of squeaky little fingernomming weasels, the badgers couldn't pull it off.

Penguins: 1
Glorified Rats: 0

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:36 PM
Someone needs more study in animal kingdom taxonomy.

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:37 PM
Someone needs more study in animal kingdom taxonomy.

Why the hell would I want to learn how to stuff animal carcasses??

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:38 PM
*walks out the thread's door and slams it hard*

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:40 PM
*walks out the thread's door and slams it hard*

Don't catch your tail in the door...

:roll:

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:43 PM
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g76/shadow_ferret/funny-pictures-angry-weasel-soup.jpg

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 06:44 PM
Penguins eat ferret soup for breakfast.

BEFORE they go kick badger ass.

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 06:47 PM
http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g76/shadow_ferret/66959_wallpaper280-1.jpg

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 06:48 PM
You should know better than to threaten me.

Okay, everybody. Here's the video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0).
http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/smileys/dance_partners.gif http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/smileys/dance_partners.gif http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/smileys/dance_partners.gif http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/smileys/dance_partners.gif

Facts:
The Badger (http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&q=badger%20comic) is a cool superhero.
The Penguin (http://images.google.com/images?um=1&hl=en&q=penguin+batman) is a laughable villain.

-Derek
Quoted for truth.

"Well, ladies and gentlemen, what a surprising first round this is turning out to be. Even though the ever-popular penguins had the momentum of a head-start and unsportsmanlike help from the sidelines, the noble badgers have surged ahead by the smallest of margins.

For all of you without a life, this is shaping up to be the battle of the century . . . if you can stay awake. As we enter the second round the ultimate winner of this fierce contest is anyone's guess. This reporter suspects that it may come down to a nose, or beak, as the case may be.

Stay tuned for our continuous live coverage."

:ROFL:

Hey, I resemble that remark.


http://i53.photobucket.com/albums/g76/shadow_ferret/angrybadger.jpg

I agree.

Thinker, http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/specialsmileys/img.gif


You've all enraged the evil penguins.

Don't say you weren't warned. Now there's nowhere to run.

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/evilPenguin.jpg

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/e4dee531-59e8-4072-8f27-bad5192ae65.jpg

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/evilpenguin-1.jpg


Jeez, couldn't you do a better photoshop job? :rolleyes:

Don
12-26-2008, 06:56 PM
Penguins iz smartrez.

http://www.2blognow.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/diving%20penguins.jpg

thethinker42
12-26-2008, 07:00 PM
Prepare to die, Badgers:

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/badgerpwnage.jpg

Yeshanu
12-26-2008, 07:08 PM
Okay, friends.

I've got a typically Canadian attitude to this war. I don't like it. Canada is a country of immigrants, and I'm a mixed breed--got both penguins and badgers in my family tree and as friends.

So I'm sending in the peacekeepers:

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h190/Yeshanu/MIL_Canadian_Flag_Soldiers_Kandahar.jpg


Just hoping the hunky guys in uniform distract sp and Lori and BB, and the guns and stuff distract the guys. Then we'll have peace.

Or at least amusement if the girls all decide to go for the same guy and start fighting amongst each other...

:tongue

Don
12-26-2008, 07:10 PM
http://inlinethumb19.webshots.com/44690/2600934330100527759S425x425Q85.jpg

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 07:21 PM
Okay, friends.

I've got a typically Canadian attitude to this war. I don't like it. Canada is a country of immigrants, and I'm a mixed breed--got both penguins and badgers in my family tree and as friends.

So I'm sending in the peacekeepers:

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h190/Yeshanu/MIL_Canadian_Flag_Soldiers_Kandahar.jpg


Just hoping the hunky guys in uniform distract sp and Lori and BB, and the guns and stuff distract the guys. Then we'll have peace.

Or at least amusement if the girls all decide to go for the same guy and start fighting amongst each other...

:tongue

ooooooooo, mens in uniform.

[/ distraction]

Nope, not going to work, today.

SP, thinker, http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/specialsmileys/lamer.gif


http://inlinethumb19.webshots.com/44690/2600934330100527759S425x425Q85.jpg
:ROFL:

truelyana
12-26-2008, 07:23 PM
Badgers, however, braved the catastrophe that was the Mattastroface.

Still...I vote penguins, 'cause of this li'l guy:
http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii53/doriangrayspictures/Pingulogo.png

Your favouritism wins me over.

Yeshanu
12-26-2008, 07:34 PM
ooooooooo, mens in uniform.

[/ distraction]

Nope, not going to work, today.

SP, thinker, http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/specialsmileys/lamer.gif


:ROFL:


Okay. Since someone has already guess my deep, dark secret:

I voted Penguin.

:wag:

Mostly because of this guy:

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h190/Yeshanu/bugsbunnypenguin.jpg

(I mean, what's not to love...)

But also because sp and thethinker42 bribe me with Cate pics.

(So much for Canadian neutrality... :tongue)

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 07:41 PM
Okay. Since someone has already guess my deep, dark secret:

I voted Penguin.

:wag:

Mostly because of this guy:

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h190/Yeshanu/bugsbunnypenguin.jpg

(I mean, what's not to love...)

But also because sp and thethinker42 bribe me with Cate pics.

(So much for Canadian neutrality... :tongue)

He is cute.

Heh, I gave you a Cate pic with NO strings attached. Next time I'm adding strings. :e2tongue:

Yeshanu
12-26-2008, 07:50 PM
He is cute.

Heh, I gave you a Cate pic with NO strings attached. Next time I'm adding strings. :e2tongue:

As in: string bikini? :D

(I tried to return the favour, but you refused to be distracted. Not my fault. The guys are still there if you want them.)

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 07:57 PM
As in: string bikini? :D

(I tried to return the favour, but you refused to be distracted. Not my fault. The guys are still there if you want them.)
Of course, white crocheted string bikini. It's see through when wet. ;)

Hah! You only sent a squad. Since, they are dressed instead of nekkid, it would take at least a platoon to distract me today.




http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/smileys/knockout.gif

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 07:58 PM
*sigh* Sold out for bikini pics.

Haggis
12-26-2008, 08:08 PM
I'm terribly sorry, but until the Penguins join the Big Ten, I have to root for the Badgers.

http://www.boneyardwings.com/wisconsin_badgers_80306.jpg

Yeshanu
12-26-2008, 08:09 PM
Of course, for the right price I could become a double agent.

Like Mac in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

Yeah, just like Mac, who sold out to this Ukrainian doctor:

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h190/Yeshanu/irina_spalko_1.jpg

Sophia
12-26-2008, 08:14 PM
Lets do some Googling exhaustive empirical research :

Save the Penguins: 588,000 hits.
Save the Badgers: 592,000 hits. ---> Badgers better liked than Penguins.

Kill the Penguins: 341,000 hits.
Kill the Badgers: 175,000 hits. ---> Badgers leave less survivors to complain.

Save us from the Killer Penguins: 92,900 hits.
Save us from the Killer Badgers: 38,600 hits. ---> Badgers, again, leave less survivors to complain.

Deaths of Penguins by Badgers: 705,000 hits.
Deaths of Badgers by Penguins: 850,000 hits. ---> Badgers better at utter destruction of Penguins than vice versa.

However, the question is flawed as it ignores the fact of the greatest predator. Thus, the definitive stats:

Number of chocolate bars made from Penguins: 150,000
Number of chocolate bars made from Badgers: 70,500

Percentage of Penguins eaten by Susie: 7,920 %
Percentage of Badgers eaten by Susie: 34,100 %

Thus, Penguins are pwned by Badgers, who are better able to survive Susie.

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/customavatars/avatar69_74.gif

Case Closed.

Yeshanu
12-26-2008, 08:17 PM
:ROFL:

I'm not sure that made any sense at all, but it's funny...

:roll:

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 08:20 PM
:ROFL: OMG, elara, that's brillliant! :ROFL:

JoeEkaitis
12-26-2008, 09:12 PM
http://images.bridgeman.co.uk/cgi-bin/bridgemanImage.cgi/600.LAL.5483030.7055475/300666.JPG
Interesting . . .

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 09:28 PM
hmmmmm ... This is Scarlet Peaches and thinker right now: :flag: :flag:

Don
12-26-2008, 09:29 PM
hmmmmm ... This is Scarlet Peaches and thinker right now: :flag: :flag:
Why would they be waving their undies on a stick?

Shadow_Ferret
12-26-2008, 09:31 PM
I don't know, but I, for one, am not complaining. :D

Beach Bunny
12-26-2008, 09:31 PM
Why would they be waving their undies on a stick?
They're thinking badgers would be foolish enough to be distracted such a tactic and not eat them.

Susie
12-26-2008, 09:47 PM
Lets do some Googling exhaustive empirical research :

Save the Penguins: 588,000 hits.
Save the Badgers: 592,000 hits. ---> Badgers better liked than Penguins.

Kill the Penguins: 341,000 hits.
Kill the Badgers: 175,000 hits. ---> Badgers leave less survivors to complain.

Save us from the Killer Penguins: 92,900 hits.
Save us from the Killer Badgers: 38,600 hits. ---> Badgers, again, leave less survivors to complain.

Deaths of Penguins by Badgers: 705,000 hits.
Deaths of Badgers by Penguins: 850,000 hits. ---> Badgers better at utter destruction of Penguins than vice versa.

However, the question is flawed as it ignores the fact of the greatest predator. Thus, the definitive stats:

Number of chocolate bars made from Penguins: 150,000
Number of chocolate bars made from Badgers: 70,500

Percentage of Penguins eaten by Susie: 7,920 %
Percentage of Badgers eaten by Susie: 34,100 %

Thus, Penguins are pwned by Badgers, who are better able to survive Susie.

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/customavatars/avatar69_74.gif

Case Closed.

:roll: That is funny, Elara, but I'm pretty sure the stats should be higher! :D Susie's curls and red bow look especially spiffy! :D PS For the record, I don't eat Penguins or Badgers in real life land. :D

dpaterso
12-27-2008, 12:55 AM
Why would they be waving their undies on a stick?
Female badgers use this very tactic to waft their scent over greater distances to attract male badgers.

-Derek

Ciera_
12-27-2008, 01:19 AM
A Badger can scare a bear away from its kill, while a penguin often IS a bear's kill.
Oh, and badgers can gallop at 25-30 km/hour, while penguins waddle and fall flat on their face.
If it came down to a fight, a badger could take down like 10 penguins at once. And it'd probably eat their still-beating hearts or something badass like that.
No contest.

Pagey's_Girl
12-27-2008, 03:51 AM
What do you think I'm going to say? Penguins rule!

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:12 AM
Penguins aren't ALLOWED in the Big Ten because they would have an unfair advantage.


I'm terribly sorry, but until the Penguins join the Big Ten, I have to root for the Badgers.

http://www.boneyardwings.com/wisconsin_badgers_80306.jpg

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:14 AM
hmmmmm ... This is Scarlet Peaches and thinker right now: :flag: :flag:

HA!

Not a chance.

I was sleeping. I am now awake. The PWNGUINS shall now continue PWNING.

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:18 AM
Why would they be waving their undies on a stick?

Oh please. You know as well as I do that I don't wear- I'm not waving my undies around on a stick.


I don't know, but I, for one, am not complaining. :D

Filthy rat...


Female badgers use this very tactic to waft their scent over greater distances to attract male badgers.

-Derek

We're luring them into a trap. The penguins are going to ambush them.


A Badger can scare a bear away from its kill, while a penguin often IS a bear's kill.
Oh, and badgers can gallop at 25-30 km/hour, while penguins waddle and fall flat on their face.
If it came down to a fight, a badger could take down like 10 penguins at once. And it'd probably eat their still-beating hearts or something badass like that.
No contest.

Of course they run faster than penguins. That's the only way they've survived this long. If they didn't run faster than penguins, the penguins would've long since rendered their sorry badger asses extinct.

Don
12-27-2008, 04:35 AM
You know, Derek settled this so conclusively in post 11 (http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showpost.php?p=3101870&postcount=11) that I can't believe the thread has lasted this long. There's a term for continuing a discussion long after the issue's been settled, but it escapes me at the moment.

Oh, well, I think I'll go read a good book. I just found this on my bookshelf.

http://inlinethumb35.webshots.com/42210/2049401470100527759S500x500Q85.jpg


:ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL: :ROFL:

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:41 AM
BLAH BLAH BLAH I can't think of any witty comebacks BLAH BLAH BLAH Time for old geezers like me to get out of the thread BLAH BLAH BLAH

Well said, Don.

Don
12-27-2008, 04:43 AM
Well said, Don.
Glad you liked it. :roll:

You didn't really think I'd leave that quick, did you?

scarletpeaches
12-27-2008, 04:44 AM
You wouldn't be...hotlinking, would you, Don?

ALERT THE MODS!!!

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:45 AM
Glad you liked it. :roll:

You didn't really think I'd leave that quick, did you?

Well, I figured it might be past your bedtime. It's probably not healthy to stay up so late at your age.

Don
12-27-2008, 04:49 AM
You wouldn't be...hotlinking, would you, Don?

ALERT THE MODS!!!
Nope, that link is to my own album. :)

Don
12-27-2008, 04:50 AM
Well, I figured it might be past your bedtime. It's probably not healthy to stay up so late at your age.
It's 7:50 PM here. I've still got 10 minutes. :D

DL Hegel
12-27-2008, 04:51 AM
Badgers are cute, friendly, and waddle when they walk:)

where am i?

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:51 AM
It's 7:50 PM here. I've still got 10 minutes. :D

Okay, well, since it's so close to your bedtime, I'll be nice and refrain from throwing any dinnerware at you.





*quietly orders army of penguins to storm Don's house...*

Don
12-27-2008, 04:55 AM
Okay, well, since it's so close to your bedtime, I'll be nice and refrain from throwing any dinnerware at you.





*quietly orders army of penguins to storm Don's house...*
That's nice of you.





*walks the line, making sure the badger brigade is in place in case of invasion of silly birds in tuxes.*

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:58 AM
That's nice of you.

*walks the line, making sure the badger brigade is in place in case of invasion of silly birds in tuxes.*

If you aren't afraid of penguins, why bother with the brigade?

Don
12-27-2008, 05:00 AM
If you aren't afraid of penguins, why bother with the brigade?
I have to keep them in line. It's my contribution to environmentalism. If I let them run loose, tux birds would quickly become extinct.

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 05:04 AM
I have to keep them in line. It's my contribution to environmentalism. If I let them run loose, tux birds would quickly become extinct.

Nice try. Everyone knows they'd go all James Bond on you.

dpaterso
12-27-2008, 12:57 PM
http://inlinethumb35.webshots.com/42210/2049401470100527759S500x500Q85.jpg
While the saucy minx's back was turned, the horny little troll filled her basket with narcotic fruits, all the better to get her in the mood. Little did he know that her faithful hedgehog was lying in wait to prick him!


You wouldn't be...hotlinking, would you, Don?
That pic is hot, all right!

-Derek

truelyana
12-27-2008, 04:02 PM
Can't we all meet halfway?

I too love badgers just like penguins, but than there is a whole load of other beauties out there, including moles. :D

sadron
12-27-2008, 04:04 PM
Penguins! They are the kings of ... never mind. >.>

Beach Bunny
12-27-2008, 04:08 PM
While the saucy minx's back was turned, the horny little troll filled her basket with narcotic fruits, all the better to get her in the mood. Little did he know that her faithful hedgehog was lying in wait to prick him!


That pic is hot, all right!

-Derek
*reads Derek's post ... studies picture ... looks puzzled ... reads Derek's post again ... looks at picture ... reads Derek's post and looks at picture ten more times ... still looks puzzled*
Ummmm Derek, single malt scotch is not your friend. Is this some weird scottish fantasy you got going on here? How much time have you been spending with the sheep up in the Highlands?

thethinker42
12-27-2008, 04:12 PM
Can't we all meet halfway?

I too love badgers just like penguins, but than there is a whole load of other beauties out there, including moles. :D

You are either with us, or against us.

Choose. And choose wisely.

dpaterso
12-27-2008, 06:23 PM
*reads Derek's post ... studies picture ... looks puzzled ... reads Derek's post again ... looks at picture ... reads Derek's post and looks at picture ten more times ... still looks puzzled*
Ummmm Derek, single malt scotch is not your friend. Is this some weird scottish fantasy you got going on here? How much time have you been spending with the sheep up in the Highlands?
One sheep! It was only one sheep! Will ye never let my shame be put to rest?!

[helpful mode]

http://i165.photobucket.com/albums/u62/dpat57/illustrations.jpg

-Derek

scarletpeaches
12-27-2008, 06:24 PM
You have defiled my thread.

And I love you for it.

alleycat
12-27-2008, 06:26 PM
Gosh, the penguins are being slaughtered in the poll. Who would have thunk it?

Don
12-27-2008, 06:45 PM
Gosh, the penguins are being slaughtered in the poll. Who would have thunk it?
Wow! A poll that actually reflects reality. Whoda thunkit?

alleycat
12-27-2008, 06:47 PM
Wow! A poll that actually reflects reality. Whoda thunkit?
Maybe she can put baby seals and piglets in the next poll.

JoeEkaitis
12-27-2008, 08:46 PM
http://images.bridgeman.co.uk/cgi-bin/bridgemanImage.cgi/600.LAL.1742030.7055475/299292.JPG

"A poll? No, not interested. Buzz off or
I'll release the attack penguins."

Beach Bunny
12-27-2008, 09:04 PM
One sheep! It was only one sheep! Will ye never let my shame be put to rest?!


No.



[helpful mode]

http://i165.photobucket.com/albums/u62/dpat57/illustrations.jpg

-Derek

This is still not helpful. I got this part:


While the saucy minx's back was turned, the horny little troll filled her basket with narcotic fruits, all the better to get her in the mood. Little did he know that her faithful hedgehog was lying in wait to prick him!


It's this part that has me exceedingly puzzled.




That pic is hot, all right!

-Derek

"Saucy", "horny", "in the mood", are not the words that pop into MY mind when I see a pic like that. Not even ironically.

Pervert.

Leave. the. single malt. alone. :tongue

Don
12-27-2008, 09:05 PM
Apparently Derek not only likes sheep, he has a thing for calves as well. :roll:

Beach Bunny
12-27-2008, 09:12 PM
Apparently Derek not only likes sheep, he has a thing for calves as well. :roll:
:ROFL: ... Have you ever seen a Highland calf?

http://i47.photobucket.com/albums/f166/dolphindancer/stuff/p20_10_hcalf.jpg

:ROFL:



Okay, now I get it.

alleycat
12-27-2008, 09:12 PM
Apparently Derek not only likes sheep, he has a thing for calves as well.
I'm thinking the troll might be more his type.

;-)

Don
12-30-2008, 07:16 PM
One more point needs to be made here.

Batman whipped Penguin's @$$.

You know why there was never a Badger villian?

Batman woulda got his face ate off.

thethinker42
12-30-2008, 07:18 PM
Penguin was a penguin wannabe, not a real penguin.

They tried to cast a badger villain, but it broke down sobbing during the audition, and they just figured it was too wimpy to bother.

Beach Bunny
12-30-2008, 09:16 PM
One more point needs to be made here.

Batman whipped Penguin's @$$.

You know why there was never a Badger villian?

Batman woulda got his face ate off.
Don, you have way too much time on your hands if you're still thinking about this poll four days later. :)

thethinker42
12-31-2008, 06:21 AM
Don, you have way too much time on your hands if you're still thinking about this poll four days later. :)

I could think of worse things for him to be thinking about four days after the fact.

Don
12-31-2008, 07:20 AM
Don, you have way too much time on your hands if you're still thinking about this poll four days later. :)
Nah, the Dark Knight thread reminded me of it.

thethinker42
12-31-2008, 12:59 PM
Just to settle this once and for all...

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/n679718831_1338106_9115.jpg

Today, the polar bears.

Tomorrow, the badgers.

dpaterso
12-31-2008, 01:07 PM
http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i177/thethinker42/n679718831_1338106_9115.jpg
March, penguin army, in your ridiculous straight line, while cunning badger strike forces maneuver to attack your exposed flanks and rear.

-Derek

thethinker42
12-31-2008, 01:10 PM
Derek, the photo doesn't show everything. Go ahead and let your pitiful badgers attack. Then you will see that penguins really CAN fly...in fighter jets.

dpaterso
12-31-2008, 01:16 PM
Derek, the photo doesn't show everything. Go ahead and let your pitiful badgers attack. Then you will see that penguins really CAN fly...in fighter jets.
I poo-poo your wild claim. There's not one recorded instance of a penguin ever operating simple machinery, never mind flying a complex multi-million-dollar combat aircraft. How would they even thumb up the trigger cover to go "weapons hot"?

-Derek

thethinker42
12-31-2008, 01:18 PM
I poo-poo your wild claim. There's not one recorded instance of a penguin ever operating simple machinery, never mind flying a complex multi-million-dollar combat aircraft.

That should tell you how few survivors they leave in their wake.


How would they even thumb up the trigger cover to go "weapons hot"?

Pfft. Thumbs are for apes. All the penguin has to do is LOOK at the trigger and it goes "OKAY!"

They're the Chuck Norris of the animal kingdom. Simple things like the lack of an opposable thumb - or a thumb at all - are hardly enough to keep a penguin down.

dpaterso
12-31-2008, 01:26 PM
Well, OK, as long as you're quoting proven scientific facts and not just making stuff up on the spot... which I know you'd never do because your sense of honesty and respect for all life on the planet sets your moral compass, which shall never deviate from true magnetic north.

-Derek

thethinker42
12-31-2008, 01:28 PM
Well, OK, as long as you're quoting proven scientific facts and not just making stuff up on the spot... which I know you'd never do because your sense of honesty and respect for all life on the planet sets your moral compass, which shall never deviate from true magnetic north.

-Derek

'bout time you saw things my way.

Don
12-31-2008, 04:03 PM
The Penguins have an army.

Big Deal.

The badgers have Hillary.

Badger... Hillary Badger.

Shaken, not stirred.

Agent 10+

http://inlinethumb14.webshots.com/41229/2987462420100527759S500x500Q85.jpg

thethinker42
12-31-2008, 04:06 PM
Pffft. And she probably distracts all the badgers, making it that much easier for the Penguin army to come in and pwn. Perverted badgers...



The Penguins have an army.

Big Deal.

The badgers have Hillary.

Badger... Hillary Badger.

Shaken, not stirred.

Agent 10+

Yeshanu
12-31-2008, 09:30 PM
The Penguins have an army.

Big Deal.

The badgers have Hillary.

Badger... Hillary Badger.

Shaken, not stirred.

Agent 10+

http://inlinethumb14.webshots.com/41229/2987462420100527759S500x500Q85.jpg

That's a badger????

I think I just changed sides...

brad_b
12-31-2008, 10:04 PM
Badgers, being a solitary animal, wouldn't stand a chance against a stampeding herd of crazed penguins. In numbers alone, though minus a few due to leopard seals, penguins have a distinct advantage. Also take into consideration environment, it's a lot colder in the Antarctic than in Wisconsin, thus penguins are hardier. Conclusion - if the badgers don't conscript a hungry, horde of leopard seals then the outcome seems rather obvious.

Yeshanu
01-01-2009, 12:22 AM
How many badgers have ever had their own comic strip? (http://www.berkeleybreathed.com/pages/Cartoon_Collections.asp)

Changed sides again...

Don
01-01-2009, 12:27 AM
That's a badger????

I think I just changed sides...
Yep... Hillary Badger. You can have your penguin comic strip. Give me a Badger stripping any day. ;)

ETA: Did you notice the armadillo? :D

thethinker42
01-01-2009, 05:30 AM
Badgers, being a solitary animal, wouldn't stand a chance against a stampeding herd of crazed penguins. In numbers alone, though minus a few due to leopard seals, penguins have a distinct advantage. Also take into consideration environment, it's a lot colder in the Antarctic than in Wisconsin, thus penguins are hardier. Conclusion - if the badgers don't conscript a hungry, horde of leopard seals then the outcome seems rather obvious.

Proof. Penguins pwn. Lock thread.

Ciera_
01-01-2009, 07:40 AM
http://thumbnails.truveo.com/0005/CB/6F/CB6FD9B069BDEDA77547AD.jpg

Penguins come with built-in tuxes, but badgers have been known to go out and find a suit. A much cooler suit. Has a penguin ever worn anything so awesome? On second thought, don't answer that. People in history have been free to dress penguins up in whatever humiliating costumes they wish. If they tried that shit with a badger, they'd get their foreheads turned inside out. This badger put the suit on himself, because it's snazzy, that's clear.