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scarletpeaches
11-16-2008, 09:38 PM
Not copied from another thread at all. :D

Okay, let's get stupid here. There's a space on your profile page for you to name your ultimate writing dream so let's expand on it here.

As someone who has no publisher and no agent, I freely admit to having the ultimate writing dream of winning the Booker.

Just for the prestige and the book sales. I'm shallow like that. I want to see a book with my name on it, yes, but also with the gold leaf flash saying "Booker Prize Winner 20??". I want to walk into a bookstore and say, "Those are my books - shall I sign them?"

What about you - is it money, fame, having your novels made into a film? Climbing the social ladder? Changing the world?

Please note: I named this thread 'unrealistic' expectations but there's no reason why our dreams can't be realised if we work hard enough. I don't want people to think I'm being negative, here. That's why I said 'unrealistic', not 'impossible'. :)

Cybernaught
11-16-2008, 09:45 PM
I expect that someday I will be able to submit a manuscript without a well-crafted query letter. I will simply send a memo on a Post-It that says, "lyk, i finished a new manuscript and it pwns. publish it now and send my seven-figure advance western union tonight. k thx bye."

Afterward, I expect to be sent on a worldwide book tour, where I will pick up a myriad of women on each signing and check into the highest-rated hotels at the expense of the publisher.

I will start an author's blog and only add a new post once every quarter of the year. It will be rant-filled and self-indulgent, discussing the rigors of writing and how hard I have it making $6,000,000 a year.

I'll submit articles to markets that don't publish the material and they will be published, despite the fact it's a Dog lover's magazine and the article suggests a good recipe for cooking pets.

Perhaps, if I'm really good, I can just churn out stories about inanimate objects that kill people and make even more money.

Bubastes
11-16-2008, 09:52 PM
The National Book Award and tons of money.

Heck, I'll settle for only the money. No sense being greedy. :D

Inky
11-16-2008, 09:55 PM
I'll be a guest on the Oprah Winfrey show...and she'll surprise me by having Orlando Bloom appear...'cause she heard I had such a huge crush...and then Oprah will turn to the huge screen behind here, and low & behold Peter Jackson's face will bloom onto the screen where he'll request to turn my book into a movie...and then everyone in the audience will be oh-so surprised to find their free copy of my book under their seats...

what?
WHAT?

It could happen...

inkkognito
11-16-2008, 09:58 PM
Okay, if I could have any unrealistic dream at all, it would to become famous writing self-help books that change people's lives...kind of on the order of how Claudia Black and the ACOA movement in the 1980s helped so many people. I don't mean Dr. Phil fame (that's like becoming a caricature of a counselor in my opinion) but rather giving talks and seminars and whatnot.

I'd also love to write/sell a moderately successful fiction book but I don't think that one could happen even in my wildest dreams. I'd like the end result, but I just can't picture actually DOING it.

Cranky
11-16-2008, 09:58 PM
Pfft. Pikers. I want a Nobel after writing only one novel.

Okay, no, really. What I want is to be able to sort through about sixty different offers of representation, after which I shall choose the most badass agent in the world, who will then sell my book at auction for an astronomically disgusting amount of money, and a thirty book contract signed in blood by a very prestigious publisher.

And then the Nobel. :D

Seriously? I just want to write books other people really like, and a few awards would be nice, too. A steady fan base, and the ability to support myself and my family through writing would be a neato addition.

"A" Is For "Agent"
11-16-2008, 10:00 PM
I expect that someday I will be able to submit a manuscript without a well-crafted query letter. I will simply send a memo on a Post-It that says, "lyk, i finished a new manuscript and it pwns. publish it now and send my seven-figure advance western union tonight. k thx bye."

Afterward, I expect to be sent on a worldwide book tour, where I will pick up a myriad of women on each signing and check into the highest-rated hotels at the expense of the publisher.

I will start an author's blog and only add a new post once every quarter of the year. It will be rant-filled and self-indulgent, discussing the rigors of writing and how hard I have it making $6,000,000 a year.

I'll submit articles to markets that don't publish the material and they will be published, despite the fact it's a Dog lover's magazine and the article suggests a good recipe for cooking pets.

Perhaps, if I'm really good, I can just churn out stories about inanimate objects that kill people and make even more money.

Amazing. I'll be your personal assistant.

Lady Cat
11-16-2008, 10:08 PM
Now this is what I call a fun thread!

I want to have all my books become bestsellers and then I want producers fighting over the honour of turning them into movies AND I want to be able to pick who stars in them. And while we’re at it, it wouldn’t hurt that those stars would do anything to star in these movies.

And money. Lots and lots of money. Enough so that I could buy an island in the tropics (outside of both the path of hurricanes and free from volcanos) with a big, white, Moorish castle style home complete with fountains and tiled, sunken baths, and filmy white curtains floating in the tropical breeze . . .

Cybernaught
11-16-2008, 10:11 PM
Amazing. I'll be your personal assistant.

Alright. How does $50 a week sound? Work won't be too hard. Just standard research with at least 100 sources, bathe my dog, Swiffer my kitchen, some caulking here and there, maybe.

Mr Flibble
11-16-2008, 10:23 PM
I want to have all my books become bestsellers and then I want producers fighting over the honour of turning them into movies AND I want to be able to pick who stars in them. And while we’re at it, it wouldn’t hurt that those stars would do anything to star in these movies.

I get the casting couch :D

I'll go for the Hugo, the Nobel, the Booker, heck every single award. In one year. For ten years on the trot.

I will also have a large house which will house all the hottest men on the planet. They will not be allowed to wear clothes except on my specific say so ( good for taking to the premiers) and their main duties - apart from the obvious - will be keeping the baby oil jacuzzi at body temp.

And then maybe, ooh I don't know, world domination? First International President?

Or am I aiming too low?

scarletpeaches
11-16-2008, 10:29 PM
I've never wanted my books to be made into films because as soon as it goes to script stage you lose control of the story.

That said, I'd be cool with Jared Leto and Colin Farrell fighting over who got to play the male lead in one of my books-to-movies.

Naked.

While covered in chocolate sauce.

Inky
11-16-2008, 10:59 PM
Nah...Gerard Butler...WITH his brogue...hate when they make him tone down the brogue...he's a Scotsman, damnit...but ye' ken me...gimme a brogue and a kilt and I do that girly thing & swoon...okay, so actually, I lick my lips and pant...but I was goin' for a cleaner image...no? Yeah...didn't work for me either!

scarletpeaches
11-16-2008, 11:02 PM
Calm down, woman!!

No kilt, but all yours...
http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii53/doriangrayspictures/Monday%20totty/GerardButler2.jpg

Inky
11-16-2008, 11:27 PM
*licks screen*

'ave I told ye' how much I miss ye'?

Uber glad ye've returned, lass!

*licks Scarlet-avatar* :e2tongue:

what?
Oh, hush. Ye' ken ye' blushed...grinned...screamed...then blushed again!

*goes back to nuzzling Gerard pic....*

Oh, if only it were a scratch & sniff....THAT would be keen!!! :e2brows:

BenPanced
11-16-2008, 11:32 PM
A 36-hour TV miniseries to cover my entire trilogy. Not just one 2-hour movie to cover each book, oh no.

Inky
11-16-2008, 11:37 PM
POOOOTER!!!
Pooter-meister.
Pooter-bud.

Well, color me nekkid, it's a bloody reunion!

*swoons....all faves now present...screw books...I'm surrounded by my peeps!*

Stormhawk
11-17-2008, 12:00 AM
My ultimate dream? A front-cover quote by Neil Gaiman.

Yeah, it's not millions of dollars, nor is it every award (though I wouldn't sneeze at an award), or even a movie...but it's what I want. :)

maestrowork
11-17-2008, 01:17 AM
I'm not going to jinx anything. ;)

euclid
11-17-2008, 01:27 AM
I will also have a large house which will house all the hottest men on the planet.

Not going to happen. I'm booked that week.

:)

Prawn
11-17-2008, 01:54 AM
That said, I'd be cool with Jared Leto and Colin Farrell fighting over who got to play the male lead in one of my books-to-movies.

Naked.

While covered in chocolate sauce.

I think I threw up a little bit in my mouth just now.

How about this: Cormac McCarthy comes to me and says, "Prawn, since you are such a great writer, what do you think about my leaving all those quotation marks out of my books? I need an opinion I can trust on this."

And, I'd say, "Cormac, you really do need 'em."

Mr Flibble
11-17-2008, 01:56 AM
Not going to happen. I'm booked that week.

:)

Yep - I booked you for the dungeon, bad boy.

scarletpeaches
11-17-2008, 01:56 AM
I think I threw up a little bit in my mouth just now...

Much more of that and you'll start writing books with a female MC called Kate, who begins each chapter by waking up and describing her own reflection.

williemeikle
11-17-2008, 02:17 AM
I want just one best-seller... number one on the NY Times list for six months should do it :)

That, and the movie made properly, and I'd be very happy.

Clair Dickson
11-17-2008, 02:25 AM
To make enough money that I get to stay home and write full time. And Hubby would quit his job to be my sexetary. ;-) And then I could pay off the mortgage and own my own slightly-used hybrid. And then, since I'm still writing books, I'd be able to help my brother(s) and maybe my parents out financially.

But the best part is using Hubby as a sexetary.:e2brows:

JoNightshade
11-17-2008, 02:33 AM
I have one ultimate writing dream: To be interviewed on Charlie Rose.

No money, no fame, no whatever. I have experienced what "fame" is like and I'd rather go without it, thanks very much.

I think the Charlie Rose fantasy is an expression of my desire to be taken seriously.

redpbass
11-17-2008, 02:47 AM
My dream...It would be nice if my first novel gets published and is a shocking success (the one most surprised would be me, I assure you). The second and third are equally successful and I am by that point rich, what with the movie deals and such. Also, the movies end up to actually be good, further cementing my reputation. I properly invest my money and am now set for life, at which point I can just sit back and churn out novel after novel which all end up on the best seller list simply because my name is on them. Hopefully I won't let all of this success go to my head :p

cherubsmummy
11-17-2008, 03:54 AM
There is this house for sale next door to my son's kindy. For a cool million dollars it could be mine. I can see myself now, floating blissfully through this pristine house, settling myself on the verandah to write brilliant sparkling prose. Everyone would know my name, most especially the people who ignored me through high school. :P

Yeah, but really, I just want to make enough to justify my never getting a real job.

K1P1
11-17-2008, 05:57 AM
Just to sell enough books to afford 1) a decent office/studio space that my stuff actually fits into and 2) a secretary/assistant to deal with all the piles of stuff once there's space to put it away.

Jenifer
11-17-2008, 06:10 AM
Money. Money, money, money. Enough money to buy Wisconsin, at least. And just enough clout to have a few people casually killed* before Kevin Smith- that's God to you lackeys- wags his finger at me.

* Casually meaning on a couch, in jeans and loafers with no socks, with a chainsaw. RRRRrrrRRrrrRRrrr...

Prawn
11-17-2008, 06:30 AM
I just want to make enough to justify my never getting a real job.

I don't know if you have noticed, but writing is hard.

scarletpeaches
11-17-2008, 06:31 AM
Is it? Huh. I must be doing it wrong.

Prawn
11-17-2008, 06:34 AM
We both are, since neither of us is published yet. Sometimes I feel like it is an unrealisitic expectation to ever be published at all, much less to be a kajillion-aire Booker prize-winning chocolate sauce wrestling spectator.

Darzian
11-17-2008, 06:34 AM
I always have dreams of answering interviews about my novel (still in writing).

Don't stare at me- you're the one who said unrealistic expectations.
:Shrug:





:D

thethinker42
11-17-2008, 06:38 AM
I've never wanted my books to be made into films because as soon as it goes to script stage you lose control of the story.

That said, I'd be cool with Jared Leto and Colin Farrell fighting over who got to play the male lead in one of my books-to-movies.

Naked.

While covered in chocolate sauce.

Now wait, is the role one in which they're naked and covered in chocolate sauce, or are they fighting over it naked and covered in chocolate sauce?

I'll be happy with Jared and Colin playing the male leads in my book-to-movie. A romance...with only two characters...and Haagen-Dazs...

scarletpeaches
11-17-2008, 06:40 AM
Now wait, is the role one in which they're naked and covered in chocolate sauce, or are they fighting over it naked and covered in chocolate sauce?

I can't decide. So...both.


I'll be happy with Jared and Colin playing the male leads in my book-to-movie. A romance...with only two characters...and Haagen-Dazs...

All twenty-seven chapters of that epic novel of yours, right? :D

thethinker42
11-17-2008, 06:41 AM
Sometimes I feel like it is an unrealisitic expectation to ever be published at all, much less to be a kajillion-aire Booker prize-winning chocolate sauce wrestling spectator.

Well aren't we a Negative Nancy, Mr. Pessimist Prawnpantz.

I fully expect to win a Nobel Prize for Literature and make enough money to have four manservants waiting on me hand and foot.

Specifically, the four current members of 30 Seconds to Mars.

In loincloths.

thethinker42
11-17-2008, 06:43 AM
I can't decide. So...both.

All twenty-seven chapters of that epic novel of yours, right? :D

Absolutely. :D

Prawn
11-17-2008, 06:49 AM
Sorry to rain on the Leto-fest, but I had to google him because I had no idea who he was. Let me revise my unrealistic expectation: Peaches, Thinker and I will be so famous that the Letos will have fantasies about the three of us wrestling in chocolate sauce.

thethinker42
11-17-2008, 06:57 AM
Sorry to rain on the Leto-fest, but I had to google him because I had no idea who he was. Let me revise my unrealistic expectation: Peaches, Thinker and I will be so famous that Leto himself will have fantasies about the three of us wrestling in chocolate sauce.

You could've just looked in my signature. Jared and Shannon both grace my signature with their presence every few frames.

And BACK OFF THE BROTHERS LETO. THEY WILL BE MY MANSERVANTS. Drizzled in chocolate sauce. And barely clothed, if at all...

Prawn
11-17-2008, 07:04 AM
Then it seems like the best I can do is corner the chocolate sauce market. That way my future will be assured, even if I can't make it big in books.

thethinker42
11-17-2008, 07:20 AM
Then it seems like the best I can do is corner the chocolate sauce market. That way my future will be assured, even if I can't make it big in books.

If I had to choose between the boys in my signature graphic, and chocolate sauce...well, enjoy the chocolate!! *runs away with the Brothers Leto and the rest of 30STM*

willietheshakes
11-17-2008, 05:18 PM
Lengthy book tours. Good hotels. Coke. Groupies.

I'm a simple man.

Alpha Echo
11-17-2008, 05:29 PM
I just want to be published.

I'm sure that if I ever snag an agent and find a publisher, I'll probably want more. Another novel published. A best seller. Another best seller. Etc. But for now...I'm focusing on writing to get published. Just one book with my name on it...the idea alone is enough to stop my heart from beating. :)

Phaeal
11-17-2008, 05:49 PM
I just want to make J. K. Rowling sigh with relief because she no longer has to feel the pressure of being the literary poster child for Ungodly Financial Success (UFS).

Broadswordbabe
11-17-2008, 05:59 PM
I like this thread.

Totally unrealistic expectations?

Having my first booksigning and seeing the line goes round the block - and they haven't come to the signing thinking it was Neil Gaiman. Neil Gaiman turning up to get his copy signed...

People coming up and saying 'I loved your book!'

Someone who's really famous in about 20 years' time coming up and saying I made them want to be a writer.

Discovering that people are writing slash about my characters. That's when you know you've made it!

Johnny Depp, Gabriel Byrne and...hmmm... a few others, probably, fighting for roles in the film. Without many clothes on. No chocolate sauce - just lightly brushed with Brandy Alexander.

Oh, and enough money to give up the day job permanently, thankyousoverymuch.

Norman D Gutter
11-17-2008, 06:36 PM
My wildest writing dreams usually go something like this:

- My self-syndicated newspaper column, currently in zero newspapers, becomes a fantastic national hit in over 500. Every other year I cobble these up into a volume with some material added, and sell a few million copies.

- My post-Bible era historical novel is picked up, after which a sequel, and prequel are published. This would make a decent movie, and possibly becomes one. This eventually becomes about a 10 to 12 book series.

- My baseball thriller is published, become a movie that wins the Oscar for Best Picture, and two sequels result.

- I develop two other series of novels (which are already on the list, both mental and written, of things to write in the future). Though in different genres, they are successful.

- I am able to write a few political thrillers, and maybe some science fiction for good measure, all of course wildly successful.

- My five to ten ideas for non-fiction books eventually result in publication, with wild success of course.

- My poetry book is either published or self-published, to greater success than all my other projects. One narrative poem from it is pulled out and made into a Hallmark Hall of Fame TV special. After this, I write poems for my own pleasure, occasionally publishing a slim volume that I don't care if anyone reads.

- I write a series of Bible studies that many people use.

- Oh, and at some point in all this, I quit my day job and never look back.

NDG

tehuti88
11-17-2008, 07:01 PM
Unrealistic expectations--all the usual stuff. Publication, fame, adoring fans. (Fortune would be nice but it's not what I'm seeking. *shrug*)

My big guilty fantasy, however, is to have all my stories made into animated movies--also maybe graphic novelizations--and to have all sorts of fansites (official and unofficial) put up devoted to my characters and stories and such. REALLY detailed fansites with loads of info, like Wikipedia style. And of course, the animated movies would do extremely well too. They'd get so popular that at the premiere of one of my sequels, there would be big cardboard cutouts of the main characters stuck up on the movie theater lobby walls. And of course the soundtracks would be really fantastic.

Oh, and then I'd have people dissecting my stories for their symbolism and all kinds of junk, okay, I'm posting and going now.

Shadow Dragon
11-17-2008, 07:43 PM
To have my first novel become a best seller all around the world. Also, like Tehuti, to have fansites for all of my characters.

Phaeal
11-17-2008, 11:10 PM
Gee, my richer-than-JKR fantasy is starting to look a little unassuming. I better work up some more great expectations. ;)

Shadow_Ferret
11-17-2008, 11:16 PM
There's really not much more that needs to be expanded. In my profile I said my ultimate writing dream is to have groupies, lots and lots of groupies.

Seems self-explanatory to me.

Varthikes
11-18-2008, 06:05 AM
My books will be instant best-sellers and be picked up to be made into a series of movies. And, I will be able to approve the script before it goes into production. And, then, when the movies go to DVD, they'll ask to interview me and do the commentary.

Yeah. That should do it. :)

Jenifer
11-18-2008, 06:07 AM
I could stand to see my books made into movies. Non-crappy-type, please and thank you.

SPMiller
11-18-2008, 06:30 AM
Since this is the unrealistic thread...

I expect to send out only a dozen or so queries before an experienced, connected agent picks up my debut novel. This agent will sell my novel for a high four-digit advance to a large publisher, which will print a hardcover or trade paperback run. My novel will sell through and begin earning royalties, thereby getting my career off to a nice start.

While this is going on, I expect I'll be writing my next novel.

Also, I expect many f/sf fans will read and enjoy my novel. My unique writing style, unconventional voice, and cliche-busting story will help trigger a shift in the market, leading to greater interest in the sort of stuff I write. In time, thanks to my efforts, fantasy will finally shed its escapist-adventure stigma.

(Hey, while we're being unrealistic, I can dream, can't I?)

cherubsmummy
11-18-2008, 06:43 AM
I don't know if you have noticed, but writing is hard.

I am sorry, I should have clarified that I was being sarcastic. My youngest child starts school next year, and I am constantly being asked if/when I am going to get a job. The articles I have sold apparently don't count.

I am well aware that writing is very hard work.

Chauchat Butterfly
11-18-2008, 10:41 AM
I just want to be placed on the same pedestal as my heros.

maxmordon
11-18-2008, 11:46 AM
Winning the Nobel by my book, an Oscar by directing and screenplay of the adaptation and a Grammy for the songs I whistled for the soundtrack of the previously mentioned film adaptation. :P

Seriously? I am happy if my book get translated to English (or if I have written an English one, to Spanish) and perhaps being invited to talk about it on TV or a convention, having fans... that would be too dreamy

blacbird
11-18-2008, 01:01 PM
I used to fantasize about the Pulitzer, NPR interviews, book readings and signings, stuff like that.

Now, I'm pretty much reduced to fantasizing about writing the check for next month's mortgage payment.

caw

Exir
11-18-2008, 03:54 PM
I have always hoped to write a story that will make myself cry......

For some reason, and despite me being very easily moved to tears when reading other people's stories, I never cry at my own story, no matter how melancholy it is.

scarletpeaches
11-18-2008, 03:59 PM
Oh, I cry at my own writing all the time...

Shara
11-18-2008, 04:43 PM
Assuming that I write a book that one day becomes a runaway bestseller (because I haven't yet relegated that one to 'unrealistic expectations'), my ludicrous fantasy is that the bestselling novel gets made into a blockbuster Hollywood movie. That I wrote the screenplay for. And it gets nominated for loads of Oscars, including best screenplay, and I get to go to the Oscars ceremony, wearing some million-pound designer dress and all the paparazzi photograph me, and I'm in all the gossip magazine and everyone knows who I am. And as we're talking unrealistic expectations, let's also assume I've lost about 50lbs and have had a makeover by a celebrity stylist...

(wakes up at desk). Oh uh, sorry. Must have dozed off there. Yes, I'll get back to typing those letters...

Shara

KTC
11-18-2008, 04:48 PM
How about I one day pick up the phone and Michael Chabon says, "Man...that was a great read. My name is Michael...wanna meet for lunch and talk about your book?"

You said have fun.

scarletpeaches
11-18-2008, 04:49 PM
Indeed I did, Mister the Christ. I hope your dream comes true. :D

Ol' Fashioned Girl
11-18-2008, 05:16 PM
Calm down, woman!!

No kilt, but all yours...
http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii53/doriangrayspictures/Monday%20totty/GerardButler2.jpg


Uh. No. Not all hers. Uh-uh.

Spiny Norman
11-19-2008, 01:18 AM
Two words: cult author.

I'd love to have the sort of material that a small selection of people go nuts over and start trying to spread it to friends and family like a disease. That, to me, would be the ultimate writing dream.

scarletpeaches
11-19-2008, 01:21 AM
I've been called a cu-

Oh wait.

You said cult?